Page 22

Chapter Twenty-One

M y body trembles and the pain is not only throbbing in my cheek but deep inside me. The mental pain outweighs the physical and reopens wounds that have long since healed. Or so I thought. It’s a terrible feeling, and I don’t want to go back. I don’t want my memories to return; I want them to stop once and for all.

But then I feel rough hands gently stroking my back, comforting me. Ezra is simply standing in front of my open car door, holding me in his arms and healing a small part of my wounds. His closeness feels so incredibly soothing.

“Move over. I’ll get you out of here,” he murmurs against the top of my head, planting a gentle kiss on it before pushing me toward the passenger seat.

I wipe my wet eyes and see I’ve soaked Ezra’s shirt. God, how embarrassing!

I look up at him, somewhat ashamed, nod weakly, and climb into the passenger seat of my car. I have no idea what Ezra is up to, but I trust him.

“One second,” he says with a raised index finger before disappearing briefly.

I watch him, realizing just how close I came to causing a serious accident—or worse, running him over—if Ezra hadn’t reacted so quickly.

Ezra retrieves his bike, pushes it to the side of the road, and leaves it there. He only takes his keys and helmet, places them on the back seat, and gets into the car. Starting the engine, he reverses off the edge of the meadow where I’d stopped and guides the vehicle back onto the empty road.

I have no idea where Ezra is taking me now, and frankly, I don’t care. My mind is a whirlpool of confusion and emptiness. One moment, everything spins out of control, and the next, it’s still, only to start spinning again—an endless, relentless cycle.

But then Ezra unexpectedly puts his hand on my thigh and squeezes it gently, and everything inside me suddenly stands still. I look at him in disbelief because it’s as if he’s my haven of peace when I need it most.

He looks at me, and only then do I realize we’ve stopped. I turn my head, trying to figure out where we are, but I don’t recognize the place. We’re in a small clearing, with only the dim light from the distant highway illuminating our surroundings.

“Where are we?” I ask, scanning the area.

“In a small bay next to the highway. I used to come here a lot,” he says.

His hand remains on my bare thigh, and despite his earlier anger, his gaze is gentle now. I’m at a loss for words or actions. I never wanted Ezra to see me like this, but a small part of me feels comforted that he’s the one with me now, offering support. “Do you want to talk about it?”

I quickly shake my head. No, I don’t want to talk.

“Is there anything else I can do for you?” he asks a moment later, his soft lips brushing my cheek.

Ezra is so close now that I can smell his familiar scent of wood, aftershave, and leather, a combination I’ve come to adore. It fills my senses, making it impossible to forget.

“Make me forget,” I whisper, turning my face toward his. Our eyes lock, and the dim light highlights the depth of his gaze. His warm breath against my lips makes me instinctively lick them.

For a moment, nothing happens. Everything is completely still, except for our breathing. Then Ezra reaches next to the driver’s seat and presses a button to adjust it backward before patting his thighs and asking me to climb onto him. I don’t have to think twice and sit on his lap.

I need this right now: peace and quiet, warmth, and support. Ezra gives me all that and so much more. I resisted it for a long time, but now I can see it clearly, and I want nothing more than to be close to him. He gives me the feeling of being whole, not hollow, and worthy of affection and desire. Is it shameful to want to feel that way?

I tentatively put my arms around his neck and look down at him. Meanwhile, Ezra strokes my bare thighs up and down with both hands. But he only goes up as far as my dress has ridden up. Goosebumps spread, and a pleasant shiver chases down my spine. I let go of all decency and reason and kiss him.

My lips meet his in a gentle, yet demanding way. Ezra returns the kiss before taking control a moment later. My fingers slide into the short hair at the nape of his neck as our kiss intensifies.

I sigh softly. His tongue is dancing with mine, making me feel things I haven’t felt in so many years.

My stomach flutters like butterflies, and it’s only because this young man is gentle and loving toward me.

He sees me and cares for me. He kisses me like crazy because that’s exactly what I need now.

Am I making a fool of myself? For sure, and yet I don’t care right now. Because I need this. I need him, his healing touch, and the distraction. So, I grind my core on his lap more and more urgently. I can feel the prominent bulge in his jeans, which gets me even more turned on.

The first dampness forms between my thighs, and I want nothing more than for him to take my mind off things. To make me forget and turn this terrible evening around for the better. I need this now. So much!

My hands find their way to his belt, and I undo it. But when I reach for the first button of his pants, Ezra grabs my hands and interrupts our kiss.

Breathless, we look at each other, and I try to understand why he’s stopping me. My brow furrows more and more the longer he looks at me.

“I’m going to drive you home now. Or to Kelly’s. Wherever you want.” His voice is soft, yet I hear that unmistakable, sensual rasp.

I look at him, a little taken aback. Does he want to stop? Now?

After a moment of me looking at him uncomprehendingly, Ezra grabs my face with his hands, a gentle grin adorning his face, and pulls me close to his lips. We lean against each other, forehead to forehead. I close my eyes and enjoy his touch and scent once more.

“You don’t know how hard I must stop right now. But it would be best if you didn’t regret it. I don’t want you to regret anything when we’re together, Beauty,” he murmurs against my lips before he kisses me again in such an engaging and hot way that it’s a complete contrast to what he said.

I sit breathlessly on his lap when he releases me a moment later. The violent throbbing that comes from his hard-on beneath me almost drives me mad, so I climb back into my seat with shaking limbs.

We don’t say a word for the entire journey, yet it’s not an awkward silence. It’s just… our silence ? And I really enjoy it. With Ezra, I don’t have to explain myself, justify anything, or be unsure of what I can and can’t say. I hardly know him, yet it’s as if we’ve known each other forever. That sounds wild, but I don’t question it because Ezra is good for me. Why shouldn’t I act selfishly just once in my life? Think only of myself and not have a guilty conscience?

He turns into our street because I asked him to take me home. I don’t want to go to Kelly’s only to tell her that Thomas has fallen back into old patterns. Besides, I’m certain he’s not home—after what happened, I expect he’ll be drinking and wallowing in his office.

“Are you going to be okay?” asks Ezra, looking toward my house.

As I predicted, my husband isn’t home. Everything is covered in darkness.

I nod weakly because I’m not sure if it’s true. Tentatively, my eyes meet his. I don’t know what to say. It’s different between us, and yet it shouldn’t be, even if the voice of reason is getting weaker and quieter in my head. But I can’t turn it off completely… can I?

I swallow hard as Ezra leans toward me.

“Don’t,” I breathe because we’re still outside my house, even though I want nothing more than for him to kiss me now.

Our neighbors might see us, and I don’t want them to witness me like this. As a married woman, my personal issues with Thomas are private matters, and I don’t want them to speculate about anything, including whether I'm involved in an affair. I need to reflect on that situation myself…

But despite my warning, Ezra plants a gentle kiss on my cheek, not on my mouth as I thought he had intended, but on my cheek. I smile sincerely at this kind gesture.

He takes the key out of the ignition and hands it to me before we both leave the car. We stare intensely at each other over the hood.

“Good night, Mrs. Shepherd,” Ezra bids me farewell with a little bow that makes me smile again.

“Good night, Mr. King.”