Page 37 of How to Trust a Hellhound (Hellhounds of Paradise Falls #4)

After a moment, he crawled up my body, laying next to me, naked, and I felt his soft, wet cock against my thigh.

He’d been so turned on from pleasing me that it hadn’t taken much for him to come.

I wondered if he’d used my own cum to jerk himself off, and a thrill went through me at the thought.

He reached over and grabbed tissues to clean us up, and then he wrapped his arms around me and nuzzled into my side.

I felt myself drifting in a sea of calm. We didn’t speak for a bit. Josh’s breath tickled the hairs on my chest, and his fingers gently caressed me. I ran my hand gently up and down his arm, smiling when goosebumps rose at my actions. I leaned down and kissed him on the head.

“Thank you, Mei Ume. I’ll reciprocate the favor.”

Josh looked up at me. “I wanted to take care of you. You’re always looking out for my pleasure, even when taking your own.

I wanted this to be about you. You needed to relax, and I wanted to help you do that.

” He smiled at me. “Not that I’ll ever complain, but you don’t always have to be in charge. ”

I laughed lightly, leaning down and kissing his lips. “I enjoy being in charge of your pleasure. That brings me pleasure. But you were right that I needed to just relax. That was a gift. Thank you.”

Josh was glowing at the praise, and I wondered how I was so lucky to have such a giving, beautiful man by my side.

Which made me realize that perhaps it was the time for honesty. Not that I’d been dishonest, exactly, but I hadn’t told Josh I’d marked and mated him. I ran my fingers along his neck where I’d bitten him.

“We need to talk, Mei Ume,” I said.

He frowned. “Nope. Unless you’re breaking up with me, do not start a conversation with that serious face and that phrase.”

I laughed. “I am most definitely not ‘breaking up with you.’”

“Then how about you tell me about earlier and why you thought you should leave,” he stated.

Ah, well, this was not where I had seen the conversation going, but Josh deserved an answer. And an apology.

“I was full of nervous energy.”

Josh snorted, because I supposed that had been obvious. I gave his side a little pinch, and he giggled a bit.

“So, as I was saying, I was full of nervous energy. An itch under my skin. I get that sometimes when something is wrong. When someone needs me. There’s too much that’s up in the air, and while it’s been quiet, I don’t think that will last.”

Josh hummed, then asked, “Is that a part of being a hellhound? Knowing things ahead of time?”

“I’m an original hellhound, created in the underworld before I came topside.

I have forgotten more than I remember from those early days.

It’s the only way to live on the mortal plane.

Did I have foresight at some point? I don’t know.

Even if I did, foresight is complicated, because people have free will, so things can be changed. ”

Josh hummed in agreement and went back to softly petting my chest. It was comforting.

“That itch, though—I think it means something has already been set in motion. Something is already happening. It can be… frustrating,” I admitted.

“Why did you think you should leave?” Josh asked.

“Mei Ume, you aren’t going to let me get away with it, are you?” I asked.

“Nope,” he said. “Tell me.”

I sighed. “I didn’t want you to be afraid of me. I didn’t want to trigger you with my nervous energy.”

Josh leaned up on my chest and looked in my eyes. “You know that I trust you, right?” he asked.

“Of course I know that, but—” I began.

“No. No buts. I know that no matter how upset or anxious you get, you wouldn’t hurt me. Might I occasionally flinch or curl up when someone is mad? Yeah, sometimes I find myself doing it,” Josh admitted. “My brain doesn’t even process it; my body reacts first. Do you think less of me for that?”

“Mei Ume, I could never think less of you. You are strong and resilient, and a flinch does not change that.”

“Ok,” Josh said. “So if it doesn’t change who I am, then it definitely doesn’t change who I know you are.

It’s just my body reacting, but my brain knows you wouldn’t hurt me.

My body knows that, too, and if given the option, I’ll curl up in your arms at every opportunity.

You make me feel safe and cared for, Wilder. ”

“I understand, Josh. Thank you,” I said, leaning up to kiss his lips.

He gave me a peck and then backed up. “Do you? Because if the option is having you here or not having you here, no matter how angry or upset you are, I will always choose having you with me. I would help you through your anger or nerves, just like you’ve helped me.

You can lean on me, just like I know I can lean on you. ”

I rubbed my hands against Josh’s arms and stared into his beautiful eyes. He was strong and resilient, and it was part of what I loved about him. He was right, though. By thinking to hide my pain from him, I had done him a disservice.

“Forgive me, Mei Ume. You’re right. You are my partner, my helpmate, and I know you can bear my burdens with me, just as I can bear yours with you.”

“It’s not just that I can , Wilder. I want to bear your burdens with you. I love you.” He stared down at me, his eyes searching mine as he said those words.

“I love you, too, Josh,” I answered. “More than you can possibly imagine.”

Our mouths eased together, and we kissed leisurely, our tongues tracing each other’s lips, our hands gently touching wherever they could reach. Josh was resting on top of me, and his weight was a warm, comforting presence, his smell surrounding me and entering into my very soul.

I eased him away eventually, because I still had more to tell him.

“Josh, you are my mate,” I finally said.

He looked down at me, his head tilted slightly to the side.

“Like Dexter and Toby? And Liam and Q? And Aiden and Atlas?” he asked.

“Yes. Hellhounds mate for life, and there are some… perks. You’ll live as long as I do, and you won’t need to worry about illness or disease. I should have asked you first, but I claimed you when I bit you. I acted without your permission, and I apologize for that.”

Josh leaned down, and before I knew what he was going to do, he bit into the space between my shoulder and my neck. I gasped, and despite the pain, I felt myself rubbing up against him and growing hard .

He pulled away, looking at me seriously. “There. Now we’re even. I claimed you too, Wilder, and don’t you forget it.”

I tugged him down into my arms and hugged him tightly, tears coming to my eyes. “Thank you, Josh. You are a gift.”

We basked in silence for a few more minutes, and then I heard Josh give a small sigh. He had smelled of happiness and joy, but now there was a slight tinge to it.

“What is it, Mei Ume?” I asked.

“Don’t tell Q,” he mumbled grumpily. “I am not having the rent conversation again.”

I couldn’t help the bark of laughter that escaped me, and then Josh was giggling as well.

We laid together until our stomachs were growling, and then we finally got up, ready to argue over who got to feed who that evening.

Josh was right. I loved taking care of him and seeing to his pleasure, but he was my partner, and he knew sometimes I needed to be taken care of, too. I was blessed to have someone so perfect in my life.