Page 37

Indy

Evander had warned that the hounds were coming, and they were kind enough to wait till after breakfast. They didn’t knock or do anything to herald their arrival, they just poured in, knocking down the apartment door and shattering the window by the fire escape.

Sully’s wards worked like an electric fence that fried skin and hair, deflecting several of the attackers while others crawled through the barrier sizzling and snarling.

Loren, Dottie, Abigail, and Gunnar armed themselves and went to work.

It was a bloody display.

The incoming hounds were stunned and wounded, giving our pack an advantage that showed in severed limbs and disembodied heads sent rolling across the floor.

I stood back with Sully, torn between horror and some kind of weird fear boner I didn’t have time to sort out.

It was a little bit hot to see Loren’s towering silhouette swinging the glaive with deadly precision, awakening some sexy grim reaper fantasies I never knew I had.

But this was merely the opening credits to a much bigger show.

Slaughtering hellhounds was akin to cutting the heads off a hydra.

They would respawn and return as long as their master sent them.

My fight was with Nero, and he wasn’t here, so I shouldn’t be, either.

A lull in the action permitted me to sprint forward and catch the sleeve of Loren’s sweater.

He whirled around with his glaive gripped in both hands and a wild look on his face.

Black blood stained his hands and dripped from the curved blade of his weapon while I tried not to swoon.

When I opened my mouth to urge him to leave, I blurted instead, “You look so fucking good right now.”

He twitched, like his brain was glitching trying to figure out what exactly was wrong with me.

Terror and nerves and performance anxiety collided in a maelstrom that made me want to dive out the broken window and fly away.

It made me stupid. And shaky.

And stumbling over myself to course correct as I batted at the air as though I could shoo the dumb away.

“Forget I said that,” I said, feeling tense and breathless.

“I’m gonna remember this, is all.” My gaze flicked over him from head to toe, and I flashed an uneven grin.

“Battle-mode boyfriend.”

“Indy!” Loren’s prompting stopped the verbal vomit and put my thoughts on board a productive train of thought.

“Right.” I bobbed my head.

“We have to go. Do you know where Nero is?”

Loren nodded back, and the polearm vanished.

We’d discussed it last night during commercial breaks and quiet moments.

The other hounds believed the archdemon had retreated to Hell after the bowling alley attack.

Odds were even he would come back, which was why Loren and I had waited for our venture into Hell.

Well, that and because I had selfishly claimed those final hours for myself.

I’d wanted that last meal, last kiss, last everything.

The clash of metal and yelping of wounded dogs cluttered the air.

Sully’s neighbors would be wondering about the mid-morning battle royale.

Like a puppy playdate that had gone horribly awry when the puppies started trying to rip each other’s throats out.

I tugged on Loren’s sleeve again, then pointed at a patch of brick wall between Sully’s bookshelves.

I’d seen him open hellish portals all kinds of places, so I assumed anywhere would do.

I also assumed I could go through them, which might have been a logical leap considering I was, apparently, a heavenly being, and the gates of the lower plane might be closed to me.

If that were the case, I would have to wait for Nero to make his next appearance topside, but without being sure how long my phoenix batteries would hold a charge, I didn’t dare delay.

We broke into motion and almost collided with Sully, who had come up behind us with her arms spread wide enough to catch us both in them.

“Good luck, you two.” Her voice muffled as her face pressed between our shoulders.

Leaning away, she brought her hands to press one to my cheek and the other to Loren’s.

Her mocha-brown eyes shimmered.

“I want you both back, you understand? If there’s a way, promise you’ll find it.”

My mouth went so dry I knew my voice would crack, so I nodded, then hugged her while angry yips and howls rang out behind us.

Loren didn’t go for the hug, and he didn’t say anything, either.

He wouldn’t. Not until this was over because today was a bad day for both of us.

The storm was raging, and the rain was coming down no cats, all dogs.

But tomorrow would be better.

It always was.

We raced toward the wall where I gave up my grip on Loren’s shirt to clasp his hand instead.

He dragged his finger over the brick and mortar, cutting a hole in the universe.

I sucked a breath and held it as he stepped forward then paused halfway between worlds.

He looked back, and I understood the question he couldn’t bring himself to ask.

“I’m sure,” I told him.

I could have died right then.

Vaporized. Burned alive.

Blinked out of existence in the strange, interplanar shift.

But I’d been yanked up to Heaven and now dragged down to Hell, and it turned out I was made of pretty tough stuff.

It didn’t feel good, though.

My arrival in Evander’s office in the sky had been overwhelming but pleasant, like when the X started hitting so hard I thought I might lift off.

This was an entirely new mindfuck.

It was dark, and heavy, and so low it felt like the world was sitting on my chest. I came through the other side in a daze, and I got that swoon in after all.

I toppled into Loren’s arms, and the intensity in his face as he stared down at me was everything.

My protector. My partner, searching me so hard it was like he was trying look through my skin to make sure my insides were properly arranged.

Other than my heart beating rapidly out of time, everything was fine.

For now, anyway.

“Look at you, still sweeping me off my feet,” I told him, then righted myself and took a look around.

The dark room was bathed in a fiery orange glow.

The wall beside us was made of stone stacked to frame a wide, tray-like inset filled with licking tongues of flame.

It gave modern gas fireplace meets medieval castle vibes, which I almost appreciated until I saw the rest of the space.

One entire side of the room was comprised of cages.

The scuffed metal boxes were packed from floor to ceiling in a grid that towered over us.

The sense of hopelessness and wretched captivity tangled with my own memories of being locked away, and I shrunk from the sight.

Loren’s arm braced against my back, and I found myself leaning on him while a horrible realization settled on me.

This was the place. When Loren stayed gone for days at a time, when his mistress kept him from me, she put him here.

In this gloomy room, in one of those cramped kennels.

They were empty now, but it was easy to envision Loren’s face peering through one of the barred doors, or to imagine the keening sound of a desperate whimper.

I’d only seen one room of Hell, and I already hated it.

“Oh, baby…” I murmured, then sought out Loren’s hand again.

It was a miserable scene, but I was about to change that.

For Loren and every hound Hell had ever made.

If I didn’t need to save my flames for Nero, I would have melted those cages down to mush.

But with the archdemon eliminated, the kennels would stay empty for the rest of eternity.

I glanced around again and identified the nearest exit: an open doorway leading to a hall.

“That way?” I pointed toward it, and Loren nodded.

We hurried.

I’d survived my journey to Hell, and I needed that luck to hold until I reached my objective.

Getting caught or even seen by demons other than Nero would sabotage our plan, but with corridors creating narrow one-ways from one place to the next, every turn felt like we were tunneling toward disaster.

“How much farther?” I whispered as we branched onto a particularly long passage lined with doors.

The idea that one of them might open and some dreadful thing could step out made my pulse quicken, and I found myself leading the charge despite Loren being the one who knew the way.

He didn’t answer. He told me once his thoughts got like knots, tied so tight he couldn’t separate one from another.

They tied his tongue, too.

Kept him quiet, tethered to his own fears.

“It’s okay,” I murmured, keenly aware of how many times I’d said that in recent days.

“I promise it’s gonna be okay.”

I gripped his hand.

My palm was so sweaty it must have squelched, but neither of us let go.

We’d been moving quickly but, as we neared the end of the hall, Loren slowed.

I assumed it was to do with the lack of available turns, but a glance in his direction revealed a profound sense of dread.

Ahead of us, an elaborate brass knocker was affixed to the last door on the left.

It looked like a demon all its own, leaking some kind of bloody liquid from its mouth.

I would have hesitated to touch it under any circumstances, and now, realizing this was our destination, I drew up short.

“That’s it?” I motioned to the door.

Loren nodded.

There was more to say or ask, but none of it found a voice.

We’d said everything already.

Questions had been answered, assurances given, and decisions made.

There was no going back.

Only forward.

I cracked my neck from side to side and finally, reluctantly, released Loren’s hand.

For this, I needed space.

I needed air. I needed fire.

My fingers curled, burying my blunt fingernails in the creases of my palm.

“Watch out, baby,” I said.

“I’m going in hot.”

The coals inside me stirred, sending out sparks that snapped, crackled, popped until it felt like even my hair was sizzling.

Heat bloomed from my back as my wings sprouted, and Loren let out a breathless sound.

I glanced over and saw my golden flames reflect in the dark pools of his eyes.

This was my moment. My chance to say all the goodbyes I never got to.

Maybe Loren was rubbing off on me because I couldn’t get it out.

After a handful of seconds standing there, burning through fuel I could not afford to waste, I simply shook my head.

Words seemed inadequate, incomplete, and I was pretty sure I would start bawling if I opened my mouth.

Instead, I pinned my lips together then sprang toward Loren, looping my arms around his neck and kissing him hard.

I hoped it bruised. I hoped it throbbed and ached like I was still there even after I was gone.

Before he could react and before doubt could shatter my fragile confidence, I pulled free of him and wheeled toward the demon’s door.

I would have tried the knob, but there wasn’t one.

Just that gross, drippy knocker ring that I grabbed, then rapped against the tap plate in a series of echoing clangs.

“Knock, knock, motherfucker!” I shouted.

“Heard somebody ordered a phoenix!”

I was readying my next insult when the door swung inward, eerie as a Halloween prop.

It was dark inside, so I couldn’t see much beyond the threshold.

Then Loren whined, and I knew.

“You have to go,” I told him.

“Find Whitney, okay?”

He didn’t agree, but I knew he would do it.

That was the other good thing that would come out of this.

Whitney could be more than merely content.

He could find the kind of happiness Loren and I had together.

Sully could have it, too.

And Loren… Maybe he would meet some nice hellhound and settle down.

Live a life that lasted more than a decade at a time.

Have something that wasn’t so temporary.

I looked over at where he lingered with his damn puppy dog eyes, and my phoenix soul sang, Mate.

Mine. Always.

“Go, baby,” I whispered because I knew why he sent me to Heaven: he didn’t want to watch me die, and I wouldn’t make him.

I didn’t wait to make sure he actually left.

I didn’t wait at all.

I simply rolled my shoulders and gave my wings a rustle, trailing smoke and liquid fire into the demon’s chambers.

Once inside, the darkness took on color.

It was deeply green, like Central Park at night, and the familiarity brought a much-needed sense of ease.

It fed my courage as I paraded into the vast space, shouting and hearing my echo call back.

“Come on out and sign for this package, you slimy piece of demon shit!”

Something clattered, like the chain around Moira’s ankle in Heaven’s basement.

It clinked from above, and I rocked my head back in time to see some kind of massive web dropping fast. I ducked when I should have dodged, and the web struck with the force of a blow.

Far from the wispy gossamer of a spider’s making, this was hard and cold.

Yes, chain. A net made of metal with weights on all sides that pinned it—and me—to the ground.

I groaned, driven to my belly while my head rang from the impact that felt like I’d taken a hammer to the skull.

It dazed me. Definitely knocked the wind out of me, and I lay gasping while a voice resonated in the cavernous dark.

“Well, this is a welcome surprise.”

My eyelids fluttered as I looked around, seeking the source of the noise.

The chains were heavy across my back, inordinately so, flattening my wings like a blanket spread across the cold stone floor.

I must have triggered a trap, or the bastard saw me coming or, fuck, heard me announcing myself taking centerstage.

And what had I expected?

That I could prance into Hell, strike a match, and bask in my own warmth until the fire went out?

Shifting and wriggling changed little about my prone position, and my breaths began to quicken.

Panicking wouldn’t help, but knowing that didn’t slow my descent into a steaming heap of scared.

“N-not such a surprise you weren’t prepared for it,” I stammered.

A rumbling chuckle answered me.

“I could not have possibly prepared for this. Who should I thank for bringing you to my door?”

“I came alone,” I replied.

It was a bad lie, and the demon laughed again.

“Impossible,” Nero said.

“But never mind that. I’d rather not have to reward some flea-bitten mutt for playing a game of fetch.”

Glancing side to side, I saw dark and dark and dark.

Fire licked from my feathers and curled around the chains that bound me.

Metal could melt, given enough temperature and time, and I focused on that, bearing down and stoking the fire until the radiant heat singed my cheeks.

The chains didn’t yield, and when I pushed up again, straining to get on my hands and knees, the net held as fast as ever.

I was in the thick of it now, heart hammering and lungs burning with the strain of sucking air hard and fast. I’d intended to die here, but not like this.

Trapped and useless, wasting myself and all my power while the demon leered from too fucking far away.

I needed to see him.

Glimpse the whites of his goddamned eyes before I cut loose.

Wasting my one shot with Nero out of range was giving “if a tree falls in the forest” vibes.

If a phoenix blows up in the vacuum of Hell, would it do any good?

Would it matter at all?

“I said I came alone,” I repeated, every word a fight to keep my voice from cracking, “and it wasn’t for some elaborate cock tease. You wanna milk me? Juice me like a fucking lemon? Let’s do it!”

The sound of his humorless grunt seemed to circle me like a buzzard making rings above my head.

“You like to talk,” Nero said.

“That won’t do.”

He emerged from the shadows in all his unholy splendor.

Still absurdly tall, still imposing, but diminished somehow.

His gait was a bit unsteady, and his red skin had taken on a deeper shade.

I remembered the burns and blisters on Loren’s face and the way the hounds had gone skittering from Evander’s holy light.

He must have injured Nero, too, and sent him scurrying back here to recover.

I would have been smug about it, but then his eyes flashed acid green, twin lights in the oppressive dark, and a tendril of fear slipped in again.

The last breath in a stream of unsteady pants whistled out of me while he came closer.

His steps were slow, almost hesitant, despite the arrogance in his tone as he carried on speaking.

“We keep our pets muzzled unless we have need of their teeth,” he hissed, “but I don’t have such a use for you. I’d have you silent and weeping. It would make a pretty sight. Precious tears leaking out of pleading eyes, wanting the pain to stop.”

I thought of Loren, my quiet boy, muted and caged, and a swell of rage banished my lingering fear.

The fire on my back turned blistering hot, making the chains into ropes of singeing heat.

They seared my skin, and I wasn’t sure I’d ever burned like this, if I’d ever felt it.

If I would feel it this time while my body was reduced to bones and ash.

“I’ll have to hurt you, you realize.” Nero continued his approach.

“It’s the simplest way to obtain what I require. You’ve surrendered yourself to a miserable existence. Do you feel foolish?”

Terror flared again, but my flames scorched right through it.

I may have looked like a worm in the dirt in front of this hellish being, but I was more.

I was a fucking superhero.

Superpowered. A dying star about to light up this dark room.

I waited while Nero walked closer, monologuing about how he would torture me.

How I would cry for him.

How I would wish for death before it was over.

And I did. I wished for death even though I didn’t want to die.

Nero stopped at the edge of the net.

There were only a few feet between us, and I hoped it would be enough.

I hoped I would be enough.

To do this right. To make Loren proud.

I curled up as much as I was able, balling every scrap of energy into a molten core in the very heart of me.

It built and grew until I must have been glowing.

Brighter and hotter than I’d ever been until the world behind my eyelids was a wash of orange red. And I burned.