Page 18 of Hotter in the Hamptons

While Aly thanked people for coming, Lola waited in the cookbook section, the roses growing heavy in her arms.

“Come here often?” Aly said as she finally made her way back to Lola.

Lola laughed. “Actually, no.”

They kissed lightly, as though they were slightly unsure of how to act around each other now that Aly had bared her soul.

“I rode my bike here,” Lola said.

“I can ride on your handlebars.”

“That is literally so unsafe,” Lola cried. “I’ll just walk it back.”

“Up to you.” Aly shrugged, a mischievous grin on her face.

They were quiet on the walk back to their street. Lola ran through things she could say— where have you been all day or I liked your reading or please don’t ignore me anymore —but everything felt trite. Aly seemed to feel the same way. Every now and then, they smiled at each other but quickly looked away. It was like a first date.

Finally, they reached their two houses. “Yours or mine?” Aly asked.

“Mine,” Lola said and stashed the bicycle against the side of the house. A big box from Amazon sat on the porch. Lola was confused for a minute before remembering it was her sewing machine. She pushed it to the side and held the door open for Aly.

In the living room, they sat on the sofa side by side, only a few inches between them.

“Lola, I—” Aly started.

But Lola cut her off. “Me first, okay? You already had an audience.”

Aly laughed and gestured for her to go on.

“I like you so much,” Lola said. “I can’t remember the last time I felt like this.”

“Same,” Aly interjected, and Lola shushed her.

“I want you in every way possible. I don’t care that you’re a bitch when you’re moody or that you’re still friends with your gorgeous, tiny, super- mean ex-girlfriend. I don’t care that you ruined my life once already. I just want you. I want to be with you.”

Aly raised an eyebrow. “Be with me, or be with me?”

“ With you,” Lola confirmed. “But you have to accept me for me too. And I’m sorry that I’m not a lesbian. I’m sorry I’m not even bisexual. I know it would be easier for you if I were. It might be easier for me too, or at least less confusing. But it’s not like I want anyone else. And shouldn’t that be what matters?”

Aly was quiet, her hands folded in her lap.

Lola continued, “Maybe one day, I’ll feel differently. Maybe there’s a word for me that I haven’t encountered yet. But all I know is how I feel, and how I feel is that I can’t lose you. I won’t.”

“You’re not going to lose me,” Aly said. She took both of Lola’s hands in hers. “And you’re right. It doesn’t matter. I know that you care about me. I don’t need you to be someone you’re not.”

“Really?” Lola said, in shock that Aly had agreed so quickly. “Are you sure?”

Instead of answering, Aly kissed her, long and deep. Lola leaned into it.

Aly whispered into her mouth, “I’m sure.”

Lola pounced on her, happiness filling her body, coursing through all those places that had been empty and sad all day, knocking them both backward onto the couch. She kissed Aly’s neck while Aly gripped her ass. “I’ve never wanted anyone the way I want you,” Aly said, and then she flipped Lola over and pulled her jeans off.

She kissed up Lola’s legs, her hands tight on Lola’s thighs. Lola didn’t bother trying to be quiet.

When Aly finally put her mouth where Lola was wettest, it was all Lola could do to keep from screaming. Aly’s tongue swirled into her with the exact right pressure. But she didn’t want to be the sole recipient of pleasure. She wanted Aly to feel what she was feeling while she was feeling it. She sat up.

“What are you doing?” Aly asked.

Wordlessly, Lola arranged herself so that Aly could keep going down on her while she did the same.

“Fuck,” came Aly’s muffled voice from between Lola’s legs.

Don’t come , Lola told herself while she licked deeper into Aly. Don’t come don’t come don’t come don’t come.

Aly’s thighs tightened around Lola’s head. Okay , she thought. Maybe now I can come.

They both did.

Just in time to hear the front door open. And then a scream.

“Lola, what the absolute fuck?”

Aly and Lola flew to opposite sides of the couch, scrambling for their pants.

Ryan stood in the doorway, horror painted plainly on his face.

“This is what you missed dinner for? So y’all could sixty-nine on Giancarlo’s twenty-thousand-dollar sofa?”

Dinner?

Then it hit her.

Dinner. With Ryan and Emmett.

“Oh my god, Ryan,” she started to say, but he cut her off.

The words were tumbling out of his mouth faster and faster. “You are out of control. This entire summer, you’ve been so selfish. You’ve been binge-drinking depression wine, you haven’t done anything to salvage your career, you’ve been entirely absent from my life, and you’ve just been here using me and my house and my access.”

“Jesus,” Aly said.

Ryan ignored her. “It’s always about you. It’s always the Lola show.”

“I don’t want it to be,” Lola cried. “You know that!”

“I do know that. Why else would you bury your head, actually literally I guess, in a new lesbian-chic relationship instead of dealing with your own fucking shit!”

The truth slapped Lola right in the face.

It was exactly what she didn’t want to deal with, stated so plainly by Ryan, who always had known her best. And he was right. Because Lola was so sick of herself, sick enough she was willing to get totally lost in a relationship so she wouldn’t have to face her own thoughts. But she couldn’t say that. Not with Aly here.

“Ouch,” she said quietly.

Ryan wasn’t done yelling at her. “Oh, poor me. I’m Lola. I didn’t mean to say it. I didn’t mean to do it. I didn’t mean to sleep with the woman who ruined my life. But, like, you did . And you’re an adult. You have to take accountability.”

“I should go,” Aly said, starting to stand up.

“No, no, by all means,” Ryan said. “Stay at my client’s house and jizz on his white sofa. Really. I don’t care at all.”

Aly sat back down, as though stunned by his crudeness.

“Ryan, I’m sorry I missed dinner,” Lola said, trying to keep her voice from breaking. “I was so freaked out about losing Aly that I just totally spaced.”

“And what’s your excuse for every day leading up to now?” he shot back. “First we hate her, then we love her, then we hate her, then we love her. Meanwhile, I’ve been here all summer, on my summer trip, waiting for you to come back down to earth. At a certain point, the problem is you .”

Lola did start to cry then.

Aly jumped in. “Hey, man, it’s none of my business, but don’t you think you’re being a little hard on her?”

“You’re right. It isn’t any of your business.”

Aly held her hands up in surrender.

Ryan continued, “And what the fuck is that huge box outside?”

“A sewing machine,” Lola whispered.

“A sewing machine? ” Ryan repeated. “How the hell do you plan on taking it back to Soho?” He paused for a beat and then laughed cruelly. “Oh, I see. You’re just going to leave it here and make Giancarlo deal with it. Sounds familiar.”

“Ryan, stop!” she cried. “Just stop. Okay? I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything. I’m sorry I let it get to this point that you had to yell at me like this for me to hear you. But I hear you, okay? I really, really hear you.”

And she did. She knew he was right. She’d come out here for a summer of friendship and introspection and had instead become totally obsessed with the enemy next door, ditching both Ryan and herself in the process. How quickly had she kicked aside that sewing machine on the doorstep? How easy had it been to forget how terrible she felt even before Aly’s article tore down her life?

“I’m so sorry that I forgot about meeting Emmett and that I haven’t let you tell me about him all summer.”

Ryan threw his hands up in the air. “How long have you known me? Twelve years? And how many guys have you seen me with over that time? A dozen? A hundred? Have you ever heard me say anything about being in love before?”

“No.” Lola frowned.

“No,” Ryan repeated. “This is a wholly new situation, and you just…you bailed on me for it. I really needed my best friend.”

Ryan was softening. Lola could see it.

“Can we reschedule?” she begged.

“It’s not even about the goddamn dinner,” he said. “It’s about you not being here for me at all, ever. Sure, fine, we can reschedule the dinner. But we can’t reschedule all the times you’ve flaked on me since we got here. All the times I was talking to you and you literally didn’t hear a thing I said or when you were just gone completely, nowhere to be found for days and days.”

“I know,” she said. She felt like her heart was breaking. The thought of hurting Ryan—who had been with her through the toughest shit of her life—was too much to bear. “I know I won’t get a do-over. All I can do is promise to do better starting now. And I do promise.”

He looked at her warily. “I don’t want to get my feelings hurt again,” he said. “It’s easier to just expect nothing from you.”

Lola felt the hard truth scrape through her middle. How had she let herself become this person? She had to fix it. She would.

“I won’t let you down again,” she said, her voice strained with desperation.

“What if we all had dinner at my house?” Aly offered. “I’ll cook. We can do it tomorrow.”

Ryan had always been dying to be friends with Aly. He’d never pass up an invite for dinner at her house, regardless of how angry he was with Lola.

“It’s kind of last minute,” he said, feigning hesitation. “I’ll have to check my calendar.”

“Please do,” Aly said. “And let me know. I would love to have you all over.”

“It’ll be like the fucking Gay Straight Alliance,” Ryan said.

There was a tense pause, and then they all started laughing.

Lola flew off the couch and pulled Ryan into a tight hug. “I’m sorry I’m the worst,” she said.

“You really are,” he said, hugging her back. “And I can do tomorrow,” he added, not having checked his calendar.

Lola grinned. “I had a feeling.”

He pulled away, a smile tugging his mouth up. “Oh, and I do have some pants that need hemming. Since you have a new sewing machine and all.”

“Whatever you need,” Lola said, and she meant it.

“I think you need to take a shower,” he said, his voice clipped. “You smell like pussy.”

She could tell he was still mad at her. But she’d win him over. She had to.

***

In the morning, Aly drove Lola to the farmers market.

Lola didn’t love being up before 8:00 a.m., but she was committed to doing whatever it took to get Ryan to forgive her. And if that meant getting to the stalls early to get the most perfect produce on Long Island, well, she’d do it.

Not that there was anything for her to do once they got there. Aly, it seemed, was friends with every single person running each white tent; she knew where to get the best of each item too. Lola stood back and watched her charm the entire farmers market.

They returned to the car with their arms loaded down with dark leafy greens, heirloom tomatoes that looked like Loewe, ripe peaches, fresh mozzarella, an entire chicken, and a bunch of basil. It really was a shame that she wasn’t posting to Instagram anymore.

They gently put everything in the trunk.

Climbing into the passenger seat, Lola said, “I’ve never been so aroused by the way someone buys groceries.”

“Should we have sex?” Aly joked, turning the car on.

“Not no ,” Lola said.

But as Aly pulled out of the parking lot, the windows down and a warm breeze tickling Lola’s neck, things felt less urgent between them. Instead, a tender intimacy had settled. They held hands while Aly drove them back, NPR playing softly from the car speakers.

“He’ll forgive you,” Aly said. “Everyone fucks up sometimes.”

“Yeah, but I really fucked up,” Lola replied, leaning her head back on the headrest. “It’s really hard to balance falling for someone and…well, anything else.”

They came to a stop at a red light, and Aly looked at her. “So you’re falling for me,” she said.

“I mean, what would you call it?” Lola grinned. But then she realized she was doing it again: she was talking about her and Aly when the focus should have been on Ryan. Her smile faltered. “I don’t want to be a bad friend,” she said. “He’s really been there for me forever. And he’s right. He’s never been in love before. The least I could do is remember the guy’s name, and I couldn’t even do that.”

“I get it,” Aly said. “But from an outside perspective, it seems like he wants to make up. Being mad takes so much energy. And he’s clearly dying to talk to you about this guy. Friendships like yours don’t disappear because of one fight.”

“I hope you’re right,” Lola said. “Thanks for listening.”

The light turned green, and Aly drove onward. “I’ll always listen to you,” she said. “I like when you tell me how you’re feeling about things.”

It was such a simple thing to say, but it made Lola’s heart soar.

***

At 7:00 p.m. on the dot, Aly’s doorbell rang.

Aly was in the kitchen wearing a brightly hued Dusen Dusen apron over her best black linens, stirring a big pot of pasta.

“I’ll get it,” Lola offered from her perch at the island.

She opened the door to Ryan and Emmett. She and Ryan hugged while she assessed Emmett over his shoulder. He was cute, which was no surprise; he had thick, black hair, olive skin, and broad shoulders. He was a little bit shorter than Ryan, wearing a blue henley and khakis.

“Lola, Emmett; Emmett, Lola,” Ryan said.

“Can I hug you?” Lola asked.

“Please,” Emmett said, opening his arms. “It’s so nice to finally meet you. The best friend. And wow, you are just as gorgeous as Ryan said you’d be.”

Lola laughed. “I like him already,” she said.

She led the couple into the kitchen, enjoying getting to watch Ryan take in the exquisite details of Aly’s space.

“We have to talk interiors,” he said to Aly, kissing her on both cheeks. “And this is Emmett, my boyfriend.”

Lola couldn’t help it. “Boyfriend?” she shrieked.

Ryan laughed. “How’s that for a hard launch?”

Emmett grinned and grabbed Ryan’s hand.

Lola felt competing emotions: thrilled for Ryan that he found someone he loved enough to put a label on and absolutely riddled with guilt that she hadn’t been there for it.

“Why do you look like you’re going to cry?” Ryan asked her.

“Sorry,” she said, laughing as she wiped a tear from her eyes. “I’m just so happy for you. And so sorry for being the worst friend in the world.”

“You’re not the worst ,” he said.

Her heart did a little happy jump. It almost felt like forgiveness.

***

Aly refused to let anyone help cook, so the three of them sat at the table and waited for her to serve them. Delicious smells were wafting around them, making Lola’s stomach growl. Boygenius played softly from hidden speakers, and the lighting was soft and warm. Lola felt like they were auditioning to be the Spotify playlist picture for Dinner with Friends.

“Emmett, I’m going to need a full bio,” Lola said. The table was lit with candles and decorated with a huge bouquet of sunflowers.

“Well, I’m a talent manager,” Emmett said. “I’m from Brooklyn originally. I’m a cat dad of two. I don’t usually come to the Hamptons, but my mother insisted I take a vacation, and I always listen to her. Oh, and I’m in love.”

Ryan was blushing, something Lola had never seen before.

“A talent manager, huh,” she said. “I don’t know if Ryan told you, but I’m in need of a whole new team.”

“Lola,” Ryan warned.

“Sorry, sorry.” She smiled, sheepish. “I am supposed to stop making things about me.”

She felt a flash of guilt remembering how she’d stood up their dinner the night before. She couldn’t believe how selfish she’d been, not giving Ryan room to talk about the perfect man at the table across from her. It clearly was serious.

“I’m happy to give you some names,” Emmett said, nonplussed. “I just don’t represent friends, and I have a feeling you and I are going to be great friends.”

She felt warm all over.

“So I saw the sewing machine,” Emmett said. “Seems like there’s a story there.”

Lola eyed Ryan, waiting for him to get pissed about her large purchase, but he just nodded at her to talk.

“I used to make clothes,” she said. “Or at least I used to rehabilitate secondhand items, give them new life. I was thinking about getting back into it. I mean, what else am I doing? I can’t work with brands right now, might as well do my own thing.”

“I think that’s a great idea,” Emmett said.

“Do you think that as a talent manager or as someone dating my best friend?”

“Both,” he laughed. “You do have to keep moving forward, you know? The spon con will come back. It always does. Meanwhile, it’s a great time to reestablish your own brand, remind people who you are and why they follow you.”

“I love him,” Lola said to Ryan.

“Right?” Ryan beamed.

“And a cat dad to boot. Are you sure you don’t want to marry me instead? My life has been sorely lacking cat children.”

Ryan flicked his napkin her way, and Lola grinned.

Aly finally left the stove and came to the table, putting a hand on Lola’s shoulder. “Okay, guys, I’ve got pasta with homemade tomato sauce, sautéed kale, and roast chicken. Give me your plates.”

“You’re going to plate for us?” Ryan gasped.

“Of course.” Aly nodded, solemn in her role as chef. “Just tell me what part of the chicken you prefer.”

“Lola likes breast,” Ryan said.

Aly’s neck turned pink. “I know she does.”

Each plate Aly brought back to the table was artfully arranged and steaming hot. Lola uncorked the red wine and gave everyone a generous pour. Finally, after they all had food in front of them, Aly sat down.

“Eat,” she said. “Don’t let it get cold.”

Lola gave Aly’s knee a squeeze, and they exchanged smiles. “Thanks for cooking, babe,” Lola said.

“Seriously, thank you,” Emmett said. “It’s so nice to not be at a restaurant for once this summer.”

“I’m so sorry for yesterday, Emmett,” Lola said. “I feel like such a dick.”

“Girl, it’s fine,” Emmett said. “Sometimes you really do just need to sixty-nine on a priceless piece of furniture.”

Aly nearly did a spit take, struggling to swallow her wine.

“Ryan!” Lola screamed, but she was laughing.

He shrugged, then flashed a wicked grin. “You shouldn’t have done it if you didn’t want me to talk about it.”

“Fair enough,” Aly said. “Okay, I want to know everything about both of you.”

***

Dessert was peaches, which Aly grilled in the yard while the rest of them lay on her lawn furniture and looked at the stars.

It was a clear, warm, perfect night. The full moon looked like an opal in the velvet sky. Just a few yards in front of them, the ocean roared in and out, washing away the day’s footprints.

“I really like him,” Lola whispered to Ryan.

“Right?”

“He’s so nice and smart and seems really…” She searched for the word. “Like, normal? As in not crazy.”

“I know, right?” Ryan said. “Can you believe there are still normal guys out there?”

“I can hear you,” Emmett said, and they all laughed.

Aly fetched a pint of vanilla ice cream from inside and then made them all put two scoops on top of their grilled peaches, which she served in white ceramic bowls.

“And to think, we could have been having chic dinner parties all summer,” Ryan said. “Instead of whatever Greek tragedy you two have been involved in.”

“I think the tragic part is over,” Lola said. “I’m ready for things to be good from here on out.”

“Me too,” Ryan said. “And I’m so glad to have you back.”

“So you forgive me?” Lola asked.

“I forgive you,” he confirmed. “Besides, it’s hard to stay mad when I’m in love.”

Emmett leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. Lola kissed the other cheek. “You guys!” Ryan cried, laughing. “This is too much PDA. But thank you. I feel very special.”

“You’re the most loved and the most special,” Lola said. “I’m so happy we’re all here together.”

Lola was pretty sure she’d never felt so happy. Everything suddenly felt possible; she didn’t have to disappear into Aly in order to have a relationship with her. She didn’t have to abandon Ryan in the process. She could have both friends and a love interest and her own wants and needs. Her mom was right: all she had to do was be herself.

It made the future feel exciting too, despite everything that had happened. For the first time in a long time, she was looking forward to whatever might come next.

“There are five weeks left until September,” Aly said. “Let’s make them count.”

***

When Ryan and Emmett left, after the dishes were cleaned and the food put away, Aly took Lola by the hand up to her bedroom and said, “I was wondering if you’d be interested in trying something.”

“Anything,” Lola said. She meant it; something felt different between them. Perhaps it was because Aly had seen her through this major conflict with Ryan, had been part of the milestone now labeled Ryan falling in love . They weren’t just two people fucking anymore. They were two people who cared about each other, who were becoming friends with each other’s friends. Aly was starting to see the real her and, she hoped, vice versa. A new sort of trust hummed between them, and she felt eager to prove it.

“Well, don’t agree just yet,” Aly said, laughing. She looked nervous as she opened her nightstand and produced a silicone dildo attached to a leather harness.

When it came to sex, Lola liked to think she was hard to shock, but her mouth fell open. The dildo was purple and sparkly and on the small side.

“Oh,” she said. “I…”

Aly raised her eyebrows. “It’s okay,” she said. “Never mind.”

“No, no, no, wait,” Lola said, grabbing the dildo from her. “Listen, you know that I like dick. I just don’t know if I want one inside me right now. I’ve been kind of enjoying sex without it.”

Aly cocked her head to the side. “Oh, no,” she said. “I don’t want to wear it.”

Again, Lola found herself shocked. “You want me to wear it?”

Aly nodded.

“To fuck you?”

Aly nodded again.

“You want me…to be the top?” Lola felt proud that she knew the lingo.

“Not permanently,” Aly clarified. “But it’s fun to switch things up, no?”

Lola allowed herself to imagine it—taking control, penetrating Aly with something she’d wear. It was a surprisingly hot visual, surprising because of how submissive she tended to be and hot because, well…the idea of dominating Aly—of Aly wanting to be dominated by her—was not something she had considered before.

Stepping out of her comfort zone was good, she knew. She’d been doing so much of it lately. She felt like it was making her a better person, or at least a more interesting one. Whereas the Lola of six months ago never took risks, the Lola of this summer was all about them.

She couldn’t conceal her nervousness, though. “What if I’m terrible at it?”

“You won’t be,” Aly said. “But if I don’t like what you’re doing, I promise to tell you.”

“And if you like it?”

Aly smirked. “You’ll know if I like it.”

Lola imagined Aly overcome with pleasure because of the way Lola was fucking her and felt her skin heat. A rush of anticipation flooded her body.

“Besides,” Aly said, “haven’t I proven to be a good teacher?”

“You have.”

“So?”

“Okay, Carter,” Lola laughed, getting used to the idea. “I get it. You want to ride my dick.”

Aly laughed too and then groaned. “Have I created a monster?”

“Maybe,” Lola replied. “But a monster who is about to fuck you.”

They undressed, and Aly showed Lola how to pull the straps into place. Lola felt like a nervous teenage boy. It was not something she’d ever fantasized about, having a dick, using it to have sex with a girl. She wasn’t sure if she’d like it, but she was determined to be a good sport. Still, she felt a little silly, looking at it hanging there between her legs. Dangling .

Aly handed her the lube.

Lola said, “I feel like I’m about to lose my virginity.”

“You aren’t not.”

She worried briefly if this was some sort of test, if Aly was trying to see how committed to the bit she really was, if it was a bit at all, or if it was actually serious. She was determined to prove herself.

Aly lay back, and Lola crawled on top of her. Together they guided the dildo inside Aly, who made a little gasp when it was fully in. Then they were joined, their bodies fitting together in a new way. Abruptly, Lola’s concerns vanished. There was nothing not to like about this. The base of the dildo pressed into Lola’s clit, and as they moved together, she found she liked the sensation of being in total control. It was nice for them both to be hands free too.

She was setting their pace—slow but intense. Her hips moved like liquid.

Aly was soft and pliable under her, following her lead, her eyes half-closed in ecstasy.

“Do you want to get on top?” Lola asked.

“Not really,” Aly said, and they both laughed.

Lola went back to thrusting. Her abs were growing tired with the effort, her arms a little shaky from holding herself up in a forearm plank, and she felt a new appreciation for every man who’d ever fucked her in missionary. It was a lot of work. But it was worth it.

“Are you sure you’ve never done this before?” Aly whispered into her ear. Her breath was hot and damp.

“Maybe in another life,” Lola replied.