Page 39 of Hollis (The Moore Men #2)

Twenty-Four

Hollis

C an’t Tell You No by Muscadine Bloodline floats down the hall from where it’s playing in the living room as I brush my teeth.

It’s Saturday morning, I’ve got the next two days off, thanks to our weekend farm hands, and I’ve got all the windows open.

The smell of freshly cut grass and wildflowers drifts in, reminding me of long summer days spent as a kid running around by the creek and through the woods with my brother.

The conversation I had with Ford a couple of weeks ago comes to the front of my mind.

There’s nothing quite like growing up country.

I can’t imagine being a city slicker. Never getting to experience nature in its truest form. No better way to live, in my opinion.

The slowed-down life.

The simplicity.

Thinking about Ford brings back other memories…

More sordid ones, like the time in his office.

Fuck, my dick gives an appreciative twitch just at the thought.

That was so goddamn hot. It always is with him.

Since we started sleeping together, I haven’t had any interest in finding it anywhere else.

This is the closest I’ve come to monogamy in years.

I go back and forth with how I feel about that.

Some days, it freaks me out. This thing with Ford feels very akin to a relationship, or at the very least, like we’re dating, and as somebody who swore that off a decade ago, it’s a weird thing to think about.

But then other days, I don’t even bat an eye about what we’re doing, and how Ford makes me feel.

With him, it’s easy.

Natural.

And there’s no denying that I do feel something more for him.

Swishing some mouthwash, I pause when I hear what I think is the door.

Tapping on my phone screen, my brows pinch together, wondering who the hell could be knocking right now.

Maybe it’s my brother. Though, he usually texts me first. Oh…

Maybe it’s Ford. That sends a zap of heat down my spine as I turn off the bathroom light and meander down the hall.

I switch over the deadbolt and pull open the door, coming face to face with neither my brother nor Ford.

“What’s up, man?” Stepping to the side, I gesture for Remi to come in. “Everythin’ okay?”

Confusion wrinkles his forehead as he spins around to face me as I close the door. “Yeah, why wouldn’t it be?”

“Just wonderin’. You never come over this early.”

Flashing me a grin, he holds up his helmet. “It’s a nice day,” he drawls. “Figured we could take a little day trip up to a certain waterfall?”

“Which one?” I ask, just as it comes back to me. “Bay Ridge Falls, right??”

“Hell yeah.” Remi snaps his fingers. “ You down?”

It doesn’t take much consideration on my part. Nodding, I say, “Let’s fuckin’ do it.”

“Cool. Get your shit ready so we can hit the road soon.”

“Five minutes,” I promise, patting him on the back as I stroll past him toward my room.

Bay Ridge Falls is about two and a half hours south of Wolf Creek.

Neither of us has ever been, but Remi recently discovered it on social media, and I knew we had to go at some point.

He’s a huge sucker for a waterfall, and based on the pictures he showed me, this place is beautiful.

Plus, I’m always down for a day trip on the bike.

Once I’m dressed, we’re on our way. As soon as we merge onto the highway, the same jolt of adrenaline that hits me every time I ride rushes through me.

The rumbling of the engine is steady and wild.

I feel it everywhere—in my chest, my spine, my legs, even in my teeth.

The world quiets down when it’s just me and the open road—well, and Remi.

I love my bike, but I don’t get to ride nearly as much as I’d like, so days like this are rich and therapeutic for me.

Twisting the throttle, she surges forward, and with the wind pressing against my chest and whipping around me as Remi and I pass every single car around us, a smile splits my face under my helmet. It’s freeing.

We make it to Bay Ridge in good time, and despite it being a Saturday morning, the place doesn’t look too crowded…yet. I’m sure that’ll change as time goes on. It’s hot as hell outside, and we have to hike about a mile to get to the waterfall, but once we do finally make it, it’s worth it.

“Damn,” I huff, my t-shirt clung to my back, thanks to the endless amount of sweat from the no-shade trek here.

“I know, right?” Remi flashes me a toothy grin as we keep walking closer. “It’s even better than the pictures. ”

The breeze coming off the water feels great against my overheated skin, and luckily, there’s a few shaded spots here. Taking a seat, we spend a little while people watching. There aren’t many people here, but the ones that are, are interesting.

“Think they’re on a first date?” Remi asks, nodding toward a couple that can’t be older than twenty-one. She’s in a red sundress, her hair perfectly curled, and he’s in what I can only guess are his nice Carhartts.

“I’m goin’ with third,” I guess.

“Why do ya think that?”

“They both look nervous,” I explain. “Which could indicate a first, but look at the way they’re laying, with their legs intertwined. That’s not first date positioning. My guess is that they’re gonna bang for the first time after this.”

Remi barks out a laugh. “You got all that from their legs?”

“Yeah, man. How did you not?” Tipping my head to the left, I say, “What ’bout them? What’s their story?”

Checking them out, he smirks, dragging his gaze back to me.

“They’re friends,” he says. “Best friends, probably. But she”—he gestures toward the brunette woman, who has to be at least mid-thirties, her dark brown hair tossed into a messy bun—“is definitely in love with her”—talking about the friend, similar age, wearing flip-flops, and waving her hand in front of her face at the mosquitos trying to feast on her—“and she is completely oblivious.”

“Think so?”

“Maybe.” He shrugs. “What do ya think?”

“The same thing.” I snort.

Remi reaches into the backpack he brought with us, handing me a bottle of water before grabbing one out for himself.

Comfortable silence settles as we take in the sights.

I think what I love most about my friendship with Remi is there’s never been this uncomfortable need to fill the silence.

He and I have known each other for so long, been through various chapters of life together, that there’s no need for useless small talk.

That’s true friendship, in my opinion; being able to simply exist together and find comfort in that.

Clearing his throat, Remi glances over at me after a while, and asks, “So, when were ya gonna tell me?”

My stomach bottoms out, and I break out in a sweat all over again that has nothing to do with the heat. He doesn’t have to clarify what he means. I can see it in his eyes. Rubbing the back of my neck, I blow out a breath. “How’d you know?”

“So, it’s true?” he asks, his brow arched, but I can’t read his expression. “You and Ford?”

Wincing, I nod, my heart clear in my throat. “I’m sorry, man. I would’ve told you, but I wasn’t sure how you’d react. At first, we were just havin’ fun; it was just sex, so tellin’ you seemed like it would stress you out more than necessary, and?—”

“At first?” he parrots.

“Huh?”

“You said, ‘at first we were just havin’ fun.’ Is it more than that now?”

“No.” I shake my head, the two-letter word falling from my lips before I even process the question. “Well…”

“Oh boy,” he murmurs. “I’m gonna need you to start at the beginning.”

Fuck. I guess we’re doing this.

“It wasn’t intentional,” I preface before diving into it all. The app, how I didn’t know it was him at first, then how I found out it was him. I lay it all out for him, and by the time I finish, I’m not even sure I took a breath once.

I still can’t read the look on his face, and for a moment, he doesn’t say anything. “Why’d it have to be Ford?” he finally asks. “You could’ve picked anybody, but you picked my captain. You picked my boss… again . What the fuck, Hollis?”

His tone isn’t angry; maybe a little annoyed, but not angry, which I’m taking as a good sign.

“I didn’t know it was him at first, I swear to you, Remi.”

“Yeah, but even if you did, you probably still would’ve gone for it,” he mutters.

“Ouch.” I chuckle. “You think so highly of me.”

“I’m not sayin’ it to be mean, but we both know it’s true.” He pins me with a look, like he’s daring me to disagree. “You haven’t exactly been quiet about your attraction to him.”

“Okay, yes,” I say slowly. “But that doesn’t mean I would’ve done it. I knew how you felt because of what happened when we were younger, and I wouldn’t have done that.”

Remi pauses, and I swear, I see the corner of his lip twitch. “But you did do that.”

“Well, yes, but the circumstances were complicated.”

He scoffs, this time unable to hide the smile as he rolls his eyes. I continue before he has a chance to respond.

“By the time I found out who he was, I was already into him, and when I confronted him when we were campin’, I wasn’t exactly thinkin’ logically.”

“So, you have feelings for him?”

“What?” I shake my head. “Uh, that’s not wha?—”

“I think that’s exactly what you’re sayin’,” he says, cutting me off. “First, you said it was just fun in the beginning, and now you said you’re into him. Hollis, you have feelings for him.”

That hits me square in the chest, and it steals the breath straight out of my lungs. Sure, I’ve acknowledged how I feel something for Ford—that much is obvious—but to have feelings for him… That’s a whole different thing.

Right?

Or no?

That can’t be what this is. I would know.

Yeah, what Ford and I have going on is more than just a physical connection, it’s more than just sex, and yeah, being around him feels good, and I look forward to the times I get to see him…

which, admittedly, is a whole lot lately.

And okay, I admit, the nights I do spend alone now are never as good as the ones spent with him, but that doesn’t mean I have feelings for him.

I don’t do feelings.

Scoffing, I shake my head. “No, that’s… No, you’re wrong, Remi.

” A dry laugh bubbles from me as I digest what he’s saying.

Every encounter with Ford since we matched flashes through my mind like a slideshow.

Every message sent. Every single time we flirted with each other.

Every picture sent. How it felt seeing that tattoo and knowing he was the guy on the app.

That first time up against the tree… Then again, the next night in his tent.

Each time we’ve hung out after that, and the way he’s made me feel.

The gentle kisses, the cuddling, the deep, desperate need to see him any chance I can.

Oh, god.

“Shit…” My gaze slides over to Remi, who’s already watching me with…amusement in his eyes? “I think you might be… I think I might… Holy fuck, Remington!” Jumping to my feet, I thrust my fingers into my hair. “Remi, how did this happen?”

Throwing his head back, Remi laughs—fucking laughs —to the point of tears in his eyes. “Oh shit, that’s good,” he breathes out .

“How is this funny?”

“You are spiraling over havin’ feelings for somebody,” he explains. “Hollis, you’re nearly fuckin’ thirty. It was bound to happen at some point.”

“But that’s… That’s not what this was supposed to be.” I’m pacing now. “This was supposed to be fun. That’s it.”

“How does Ford feel?”

My brows pinch together as I stop pacing and narrow my gaze. “How am I supposed to know?”

“Uh, haven’t y’all talked about this?”

I nearly balk. “No? What is there to talk about?”

“I don’t know, Hollis.” He snorts. “Maybe that you have feelings for him? Don’t you wanna know if he feels the same?”

I shake my head quickly. “He doesn’t.”

“And you know that how?”

“Because that’s not what this is,” I repeat through gritted teeth. “Wait— Are you not mad?”

“I’m not exactly thrilled , but I’m not mad either.” Then he adds, “I mean, I guess I was a little annoyed at first. Mostly because you were keepin’ it from me, and because I don’t want your dick to get in the way of my career.”

“Ford would never allow that to happen,” I say, tone very matter of fact.

Heaving a sigh, Remi stands up too. “I know that.”

“Remi, I swear, this was never supposed to get this far.”

He places a steady hand on my shoulder, looking me in the eye. “Okay, but now that it has, you have to talk to him. With the divorce behind him, you need to tell him how you feel, see how he feels.”

My face scrunches up. “I don’t get why you’re being so nonchalant about this.”

“I don’t either,” he drawls. “But you’re my best friend, Hollis, you’re my family, and I want you to be happy. That’s all I’ve ever wanted. You’ve sworn off dating and relationships for so long… I guess the idea of seeing you in love makes it kinda hard for me to be mad at you.”

I’m already shaking my head, even as my stomach flips. “I’m not in love.”

He snorts. “Yeah, okay, buddy. Denial isn’t only a river in Egypt.”

“Oh, fuck off.” I chuckle. “That’s not what?—”

“This is,” he finishes for me. “Yeah, I heard you.”

I stare at him for a moment, at a loss for words. Remi knows… My best friend knows I’ve been sleeping with his boss. He knows, and he’s not mad.

Wow.

Not how I saw today going, but okay.

“How’d you figure it out?” I ask, needing to know.

“Dude…” He huffs out a breath. “You left your hat on his desk.”

“Oh, shit.” I wince. “I did, didn’t I?”

“Yeah.” Chuckling, he says, “Pretty easy to put two and two together.”

“Damn…”

That’s all that’s said about it for the rest of the day.

We end up walking closer to the waterfall, and Remi snaps some pictures, then we hop on our bikes and head back to town.

Stopping at a diner on the way, I’m surprised how not awkward things feel between us.

It’s like the conversation back at Bay Ridge never even happened.

But there’s one thing I can’t get out of my mind…

I’m not in love with Ford.

Yeah, okay, maybe I was completely oblivious to the feelings I have for him, but love is different. I would know if I was in love with somebody… Right? I haven’t been in love before, but surely, that’s something someone would know, even if they had no experience in that situation.

This is feelings… Not love.

He might’ve been right about one thing, but Remi’s wrong about this.

He is.

I think.