Page 31 of His Sunshine Baby (The Silver City #2)

My first thought, the next morning, is about how well I’ve slept. For the first time in a while, the sun is already up outside, and I don’t feel like jumping out of bed. I would rather not. Estelle is still sound asleep right next to me, in a curled-up position, so cute I can’t bear it. I slowly recall everything that happened yesterday as if it was a dream. But it’s not, and my daughter is right here.

I observe her for a while until someone slowly opens the door. I frown before realizing it’s James, on his short legs, looking at us with his big blue eyes. Damn, this kid is an energy pill.

Having spotted his newly befriended cousin, he walks up to us with anticipation, but I frown.

“James, if you wake her up…” I whisper.

What time is it anyway? Probably not late, considering we are in July and the sky is still slightly pink. Of course, my nephew decides to play deaf, putting his hands on the bed.

“ Nora, Damian, your kid is here. ”

I sense my brother’s frustration, while Nora is probably still asleep as well. A few seconds later, my brother walks in, but his sudden arrival makes his kid scream and run away. Damian grabs him before he can get out.

“James, you little…”

“… Daddy?”

Damn it, now she’s awake too. I sigh.

“Sorry, Nate, I didn’t realize he was up,” says my brother.

“Good morning, Uncle Damian. Good morning, James,” says Estelle in her little voice.

“Stella! Up, up!”

She smiles and slides off the bed to walk up to him. Damian gives up and lets his son down, who grabs Estelle and takes her somewhere else in the house. I sigh.

“Ever tried the leash on him?”

“Trust me, I’ve thought about it a couple of times,” admits my brother. “Coffee?”

“Moon Goddess, yes.”

We both head to the kitchen to prepare breakfast for everyone. From the snoring we can hear, Boyan slept on the couch. I check the cupboard to see what I can cook for everyone, and realize they are even fuller than usual. Who the heck eats this much pesto?

“Don’t ask,” sighs Damian, spotting my confused expression. “Nora eats like a dinosaur with this one.”

I chuckle. It’s probably better than being exhausted like she was with James. I finally find enough ingredients to make some pastries and hot chocolate while Damian is in charge of the coffees, which pretty much sums up his culinary skills.

“Daddy? What are you making?”

Estelle just walked in, curious. She climbs up onto one of the kitchen stools.

“Croissants. Do you like them?”

“I don’t know. Can’t you make a magic cake?”

A magic cake? What the heck is a magic cake? I exchange a glance with Damian, but he’s about as clueless as me. I turn to my daughter, with her messy hair and oversized pajamas.

“What is a magic cake, baby star?”

She hesitates then points at one of the hot chocolate cups. Something with hot chocolate?

“A mug cake, honey?”

Nora just walked in, and quickly kisses her husband.

“Damian, I really hope it wasn’t your son I just saw drawing on his bedroom wall.”

“Crap.”

My brother runs out, and Nora turns to us with a large smile.

“A mug cake?” I repeat, confused.

Stella nods, smiling from ear to ear, while Nora laughs at my confused expression. She grabs one of the cups and some of the ingredients I took out and puts it in the microwave.

“Well, you know how bad Elena’s cooking is, so I gave her this recipe. Two minutes to make a chocolate mug cake, with a microwave and basic ingredients. James loves these too.”

“You’re telling me I just spent fifteen minutes preparing croissants for nothing?” I sigh.

“I love croissants, but for kids, this works better,” she says with a confident smile.

As it turns out, Nora is right. Both James and Estelle eat their mug cakes in a few minutes, looking happy and satisfied. Okay, I may be the best at cooking, but my sister-in-law definitely beats me at handling kids.

Damian lets me know that after a call to the hospital, Elena hasn’t woken up yet, but everything else looks alright.

“I’ll go visit her this morning; I need to do my pregnancy check-up anyway. How about you take Estelle out?”

I nod. I did say I would take her shopping and to see my place too. I’m not sure how confident I am about watching a kid, though.

“How about you go with Boyan? He’s good with kids, and it will give him a break from watching me and James all the time.”

“Okay.”

I’m still not confident about this. I’ve never spent the day alone with a child, let alone my four-year-old daughter who I didn’t know until yesterday. However, I still want to spend as much time as I can to get to know her. I borrow one of my brother’s cars and take us to the mall, which is not too busy on a Sunday. Plus, the huge brown wolf next to us keeps everyone at bay, meaning we can walk side by side and take our time.

Truthfully, it’s even better than I thought. First, Estelle is impressed by everything. She’s never been to a mall and seen so many things or so many people in one place. Though she doesn’t let go of my hand one second, her eyes are everywhere. I’m also shocked by how well-behaved and shy she is.

Even if she sees something she really likes, she will just stare at it and not ask for anything. It takes me a while to realize every time, and I have to insist and ask several times if she wants it. If I make her try on clothes, she’s happy to show it to me and blushes anytime I or any of the salespeople gives her a compliment. In the end, despite my best efforts, we only buy a few outfits, two pajamas, and a drawing set.

I sigh as we exit another shop empty-handed, but Estelle doesn’t seem to mind at all.

“ Don’t worry. You’re doing well. ”

“ You think so, Boyan? ”

“ She’s just not your average kid. She grew up in a forest; this is too new for her. Spending time with you is probably more important to Stella than all that stuff you want to buy her. ”

I realize he’s probably right. Everywhere we went, Estelle made sure I was never out of reach or sight. She just won’t leave my side, and looks to me for everything. I put a knee down to face her.

“Estelle, shall we have lunch now? Are you hungry?”

“Um… a little bit.”

“What do you want to eat?”

She seems to hesitate, then looks around. This mall has a few restaurants open, and from across the hall, she spots the food court with people lining up. It will probably be easier if she can see the food. We walk over there, checking what’s available. There are a couple of Asian food stalls, one for sushi, two famous fast-food chains, an Indian one, and a Mexican one.

“Daddy? What do you like best?”

“I’m not sure. Which one do you like, Estelle?”

“I don’t know…”

A lady is giving samples a bit further along, and after trying it out, we settle for the Asian food one. It turns out my daughter loves the noodles and sweet and sour pork. It’s nice to simply chat like this and eat together, trying each other’s food. I realize it’s also the first time I’ve really taken a day off in ages.

“… Daddy?”

“What is it?”

“Are we going to live at Auntie Nora’s house now?”

I hesitate while Estelle is waiting for my answer with an anxious expression. What should I tell her? Until Elena wakes up, and even after, it will be a difficult question.

“I think so, until your mom wakes up.”

“And when Mommy wakes up?”

“It will be up to your mom to decide?”

“We can’t… live in your house in the sky?”

“Only if Mommy wants to, little star. But I’m not sure.”

That will probably depend on how mad her mother is with me… and if there’s a chance for all three of us to be a family again, I guess. Estelle nods.

“I understand. I hope Mommy will wake up soon.”

“Me too, little star. Let’s go see her after we are done shopping, okay?”

“Do we still need to buy more?”

“Didn’t you want a new bunny?”

Her eyes suddenly light up, and I’m glad she looks happy again. We finish eating quickly, and do some more shopping, but without finding a new plushie to her liking. She seems happy about her drawing set though and keeps looking at it in the car as I drive to the hospital.

“ Nate? ”

“ Damian, we’re going to the hospital with Estelle. ”

“ I was about to call you; Elena just woke up. ”

I stay speechless. Shit, really? Now? I can barely think. I park the car in the first spot I see, taking deep breaths.

“Daddy?”

“Give me a minute, baby.”

I grab my phone, fidgety, calling Damian.

“What?”

“Is she… she okay?”

“Yeah. She’s with a doctor, but she’s fine. She asked about Estelle as soon as she woke up, and Nora’s with her right now. Are you far from the hospital?”

“We were on our way. We’ll be there in five minutes.”

“See you then,” he says before hanging up.

Crap. I’m not ready. Despite all this time with Estelle, I’m so not ready to face her mom. What should I tell her? Should I apologize straight out, ask for forgiveness? Or try the friendly approach first? Damn it, what friendly approach, you dumbass.

“Mommy is awake?”

“Yeah, baby.”

“Can we go? Daddy, can we go see Mommy? Please?”

I take a deep breath.

No matter what, I want to see her. I don’t want to push this back any longer. For Estelle’s sake, too, we need to have this conversation, as painful as it may be.

“… Daddy?”

“Yeah, we’re going. Let’s go see Mom.”

“Yay!”

She looks bright and happy again, unaware of my inner turmoil. I drive to the hospital, a hundred thoughts fighting inside my head. I’m a mess inside, and I’m so not ready when I finally park, helping Estelle out while Boyan takes the lead.

We walk inside, and honestly, I’m torn between running to her room and running outside. I’m just… so ashamed. Ashamed of the idiot I’ve been, ashamed of everything I’ve said to her. How mad will she be? How much can she really resent me, after all this time?

“Daddy!”

Estelle guides me back to her mom’s room; she already remembers which one it was. We wait outside for a second, and Nora suddenly walks out.

“Auntie Nora! Mommy is awake!”

“Yes she is, sweetheart. You ready to see her?”

“Yes! Can I go in now?”

“Go, honey. No running and no screaming, okay?”

“Yes, I promise!”

After that, Estelle lets go of my hand to rush to her mom, yet not running as she promised. I stay outside the room, my heart thumping loud. Nora looks at me, a bit worried.

“Nathaniel? Are you okay?”

“I don’t know… what to say.”

“It’s okay. You two need to talk, okay?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I know.”

“Alright. I’ll stay here with Bobo.”

I nod, my mouth a bit dry. Yeah, I’ll be fine. We will be fine.

I step inside, and the only separation between us is a simple curtain. I can already hear her voice, talking with Estelle.

“… he bought you new clothes?”

“Yes! Daddy got me a new drawing set too. It has fifty pencils, a lot of pretty colors, and even animal stamps.”

“Whoa, you’ll make pretty pictures with that?”

“Of course! I’ll make new ones for you, Mommy. And for Auntie Nora too! And Daddy!”

I try to gather my courage and take another step, but Moon Goddess, I’m scared. I can’t remember the last time I was so stressed.

“… Nathaniel, if you want to talk, you’ll have to stand where I can see you.”

Her voice takes me by surprise, causing me to jump. Damn it. Of course she felt me. I gather up all my courage and step forward, finally facing her hospital bed.

Damn it. It’s so… awkward.

And Moon Goddess, she’s so beautiful. Elena’s sitting up, in a hospital gown, Estelle right next to her on the bed. Her hair is brushed compared to yesterday, and she looks a bit healthier too, despite the dressings on her head and her arm in a sling. Her face has better colors, and her eyes are open.

Open and looking right at me.

“… Hi,” I finally manage to blurt out.

“Hi, Nate.”

The simple fact that she uses my nickname means the world to me. I walk a bit closer, and Estelle, unaware of that atmosphere between us, smiles at me. Elena caresses her hair, and I can finally see how alike they are.

“Thank you for taking care of her,” Elena says.

“I should be the one to say that.”

I smile a bit, she knows what I mean by those words. I know, I know she’s my daughter, and she had to raise her alone.

“… It’s okay.”

“It’s not okay, Elena. I’m sorry.”

“I don’t need an apology.”

“I’m really sorry.”

She glares at me, a bit annoyed, but I need to say it. I need to lift that weight off my heart, even if it’s just a little.

“Things shouldn’t have turned out the way they did. I should have believed you, I should have helped you from the start.”

“Nathaniel, I really don’t want to hear this right now. Honestly, I’m just glad we are both fine, okay? I don’t… I’m not in the mood to have that conversation now. Really.”

Her last words sound a bit annoyed, and I realize. It’s maybe a bit too… early for that. I nod, and Elena turns to Estelle again.

“You’ve been a good girl with Auntie Nora and Daddy, my baby star?”

“Yes! And Auntie Nora made us magic cakes this morning!”

“You slept at Auntie Nora’s?”

While she tells her mom all about last night, I grab a chair and sit next to them, unable to take that stupid smile off my face now. I’m just an idiot, happy to be with these two. I feel a bit relieved, though I know we still need to have the talk later. I’m just glad she didn’t refuse to see me, cursed at me, or kicked me out. It could have been way worse.

“Mommy, are you coming to sleep at Auntie Nora’s home?” asks Estelle.

“No, baby star, I need to stay in the hospital. Mommy is still very tired, okay?”

“Okay. But Auntie Nora said I can’t sleep with you.”

“Yes, but you can sleep at Auntie Nora’s house for now, okay?”

“Actually…”

I hesitate, but I really need to ask.

“I was thinking… I mean, Estelle was also asking if she could sleep at my place.”

To my surprise, Elena nods.

“Sure.”

“Really?”

I was prepared for her to say no, but she just smiles at Estelle.

“You can ask Daddy or Auntie Nora and pick where you want to sleep, okay? Auntie Nora says you and Daddy can sleep at her house too if you want, but I think your cousin is tiring her out a lot…”

Estelle chuckles.

“James runs around a lot!”

“Yeah, and you saw Auntie Nora’s tummy? She is going to have another baby!”

“I know! I will have another cousin!”

“That’s right, baby star, but until the baby is born, it’s better to let Auntie Nora rest, okay?”

“Okay! I can go and sleep at Daddy’s house then?”

“Yes, if Daddy is okay with it.”

Estelle turns to me, excited.

“Daddy, can I sleep at your house tonight? The one in the sky?”

I smile.

“Of course, baby.”

She smiles brightly at me. I’m so grateful she feels safe at my place… and it seems to show Elena I’ve been doing alright as a dad so far. The two of them exchange smiles, and Elena caresses her hair. Something in her smile seems forced, though. Is she in a lot of pain? Or trying to act tough for Estelle?

“Mommy, when will you get out of this hospital?”

“Um... When the doctors say I can, baby star.”

Estelle frowns, a bit disappointed with her answer. She inevitably glances down at her mom’s injuries, especially her arm.

“Does it hurt very bad?”

“It’s okay, baby star.”

It’s probably not as okay as she wants to make it sound. For Elena to be faking smiles and allowing her daughter to see her wired to a hospital bed, her injuries must be greater than she’s showing…

“Do you want me to blow on it? Like you did when I scratched my knee? It really worked, you know!”

“If you want, baby star. You’ll give Mommy a kiss, so I’ll be all better?”

“Of course!”

Damn, I could just melt from watching the two of them together. They hug, with a closeness I can only watch from the sidelines, making me a little bit jealous… until I catch Elena looking at me over Estelle’s shoulder. We stare at each other, for just a few seconds, until loud steps come from the corridor.

“Elena! Elena! Babe, oh my babe…”

Her friend Daniel just barged in, looking panicked. He runs to her, but Elena grabs his collar right before he jumps on her.

“Daniel Lewis, if you hurt me with one of your herculean hugs, I’ll kick your butt as soon as I can stand, you hear me?”

To my surprise, he just laughs.

“Moon Goddess, it’s really you… Oh babe, I missed you.”

The two of them hug, Estelle caught in between. I’m feeling a bit out of place now, but I just stay quiet, waiting.

“Are you okay? It doesn’t hurt? I can ask them to increase the morphine dose, but…”

“I’m okay, Danny, chill.”

“Babe. You could have…”

She frowns, and I know she’s telling him to be mindful about Estelle, who’s right next to them. To my surprise, she turns to me.

“Can you take her? I need to talk with Daniel.”

I’m a bit disappointed that’s all she asks of me, but I hurry over.

“Sure. Estelle, are you coming? Let’s go grab the hot chocolate you liked last time.”

“Oh, yes! Mommy, do you want a hot chocolate too? They are really good, and the nice lady puts sprinkles on it!”

“I’m fine, baby, eat a lot of sprinkles for me, okay?”

“Okay! See you later Mommy, see you later Dada!”

“Bye, baby star.”

We walk out, Estelle still waving at her mom, while I feel like I left my heart back there…

I drive us back to my place, Estelle sipping her hot chocolate in the back seat, excitedly talking to me about how happy she was to see her mom.

I still can’t believe it, either. I was prepared for anything, for Elena to scream or yell at me. I wouldn’t even have blamed her if she punched me a few times. I’m still waiting for it. I take a glance at my baby star in the back seat. How did she raise such a precious, perfect little girl alone like that? I take a deep breath.

I need to make things right. Not just with Estelle; I want to resume my relationship with Elena too. Even if it takes years, I want to earn her forgiveness, have them both back in my life, and stop being that ghost I’ve been for the past four years. I’m the most selfish man there is, for sure, but honestly, I’d rather die than miss my chance again.

I finally park in front of the residence, escorting my baby star out of the car. She is amazed by the view of the sea behind us.

“Daddy! Is it the ocean? It’s so big!”

“Yes, baby star. Come, you will see it even better from my apartment.”

“Really?”

She takes my hand and follows me inside. The concierge, Harry, opens his eyes wide, seeing me walk in with a kid. Aside from Elena or my family, he’s never seen me bring anyone else home.

“Good evening, Mr. Black. May I ask who the little Miss with you is?”

Estelle, a bit shy, exchanges a glance with me before smiling at him.

“I’m Estelle, mister.”

“Nice to meet you, Miss Estelle, I am Harry. Please let me know if you need anything.”

“Thank you, Harry!”

“Thanks, Harry,” I say, a bit proud.

While we walk to the elevator, Estelle suddenly stops. You can see the pool from the other side of the glass wall, and she is stunned.

“Daddy! There is a huge pool too!”

“I know. Do you want to go for a swim later?”

She frowns, turning to me.

“I don’t know how to swim… and I don’t have a swimsuit…”

“Alright, then we can buy you a swimsuit, and Daddy can teach you to swim, okay?”

She nods with a big smile, her eyes turning to the pool again. It’s cute how she can barely manage to hide her excitement. We take the elevator to my apartment, and when she walks in, she doesn’t dare to walk away from me, even after we take our shoes off.

“This is… Daddy’s house?”

“Yes. Go on. Don’t you want to explore it?”

“But… you live alone, Daddy?”

“Yes. Your uncles come sometimes. But your mom is the only girl who came here before you.”

“Really?”

With excitement, she finally walks in, looking at everything around her. Now that I think about it… maybe Estelle was even conceived here. Not a lot of things have changed since then. I like a somber, neat style. Liam always says my apartment looks like it’s for sale, since it’s so clean you wouldn’t have guessed that someone lives here… Well, I usually only come here to shower and sleep.

“Daddy! There are so many rooms!”

I hear her running from one room to another, and I laugh. That place really is big. Way too damn big for just myself, actually. I remember I bought it because I had the means to get the best, but for one man alone, it’s ridiculously big. What was I thinking? I understand Damian better now. He just lived in the place above his office, with just one bedroom, and waited until he had a wife and children to get a huge family house.

“Estelle, come see the view!”

She comes out of one of the rooms while I put our shopping bags in a corner. I take her to the balcony, which offers an incredible view of Silver City, its buildings, and the sea, on the left. She’s silent, but I can tell she’s stunned.

“Daddy… It’s so big, like a forest of buildings…”

I nod and take a seat next to her. Elena loved this view too. I remember sitting here so many times with her, watching it while listening to her music. Even when it rained, she would lie on the couch and face the glass wall to watch it. Estelle goes to the edge of the balcony, looking at everything for a long time, sometimes commenting about some funny-shaped building, asking me what is this or that, and making me point out our company, the hospital where her mom is, and her auntie Nora’s house.

“I miss Mommy already,” she says, turning to me with a sad little face all of a sudden.

I open my arms, and she comes to sit on my lap. I gently tuck her blonde hair behind her ears, looking at my daughter up close.

“I miss her too, little star.”

“Do you think Mommy can leave the hospital soon?”

I nod.

“Of course. Your mom is super strong.”

“How soon? Tomorrow?”

“I don’t know, baby. That’s for the doctors to decide.”

“Okay.”

But I can tell she’s unhappy, looking down. How do I cheer up a four-year-old, especially without her mom?

“You’ll stay with me until Mommy gets out, okay? And we will go and see her every day, I promise.”

“Really?” she asks, her eyes shining again.

“I promise. Meanwhile, we can do anything you want: go to the sea, to the movies, to your auntie’s house…”

Estelle smiles wide again, making me feel I did something right.

“Can we eat more pizza?”

I laugh.

“You’re already addicted to pizza? It really is in your genes. How about I make you some homemade pizza tonight?”

“Is that okay? We had pizza yesterday.”

“Then… I can make something else if you want? Or we can even eat out?”

“I’ll eat what Daddy makes!”

After a while, we agree to make some mac and cheese and rent a Disney movie. As expected, she had never seen one. We end up seeing two more Disney movies together before she falls asleep on the couch beside me, and I take her to the bedroom.

Damian gives me a call that night, making sure everything’s fine. I don’t think I’ve ever been so grateful to my older brother. He’s always been on my side, but… It’s a strange feeling, him helping me become a good father. He gives me a few tips about what I could do with Estelle, what kind of food I should try with her, and so on. He’s been a dad for two years, but I have a four-year-old all of a sudden. I guess I’m doing something right if she’s happy staying with me so far. I also realize my place isn’t very child-friendly. I could use a few more toys and less impractical furniture.

The next day, I let Estelle pick one of the bedrooms to become her own. She’s so happy about getting her own room at my place and picks one with a good view of the sea, but more importantly, the one closest to mine. I tell her we will decorate it to her liking, and we spend the day going to furniture and toy stores. After a while, she goes for a winter theme after her new favorite Disney movie. She is most excited that we will paint it together, as she picked some turquoise paint.

We visit her mother in the afternoon, but as expected, Elena only wants to see her daughter. We barely exchange a few words. I’m fine with just seeing her for a while though. I spend more time discreetly inquiring with her doctor. She’s getting better, and should be discharged soon, much to my relief.

After two hours, Estelle agrees to leave, a bit sad to part with her mom again, and we spend the rest of the evening painting, as she was excited to start remodeling her new bedroom and finish the night by watching more Disney movies with my delicious homemade pizza.

While putting my daughter to bed, I realize I completely forgot about work, but Isaac didn’t call me, and neither did my secretary, so I guess it’s fine…

The next morning, Damian calls me.

“Elena can leave the hospital.”

“What? Really?”

I’m busy preparing breakfast for my daughter who’s still asleep, and I almost drop the pan. She… Elena can leave the hospital? Already?

“Yeah,” says Damian. “Her shoulder is still injured, so her arm is not healed completely, but her legs are fine now. She can walk, and apparently, she insisted on leaving quite a lot.”

“When?” I ask, fidgety.

“She’ll be discharged after they give her a new cast and she gets the clearance, so… in an hour or so.”

“Okay. Can you delay it? I want to bring Estelle there before she leaves.”

“Fine, I’ll talk to the hospital director. But hurry up.”

“Yeah. Thanks.”

I hang up, and notice Estelle woke up, walking to me half-asleep while carrying her new bunny plushie.

“Good morning, Daddy,” she says in her sleepy voice.

I walk over to kiss her cheek, picking her up to carry her. Even her eyes are still fighting to stay open.

“Baby, I got good news from your uncle.”

“Uncle Damian?”

“Yes. Your mom is leaving the hospital today.”

Suddenly, she’s completely awake and excited, her big eyes looking at me.

“Really? Really, Daddy? Mommy can leave? Today?”

“Yes, baby. So, you should eat your breakfast and we can go see her.”

“Okay! Daddy, I’ll eat fast so we can go right after, right? Daddy, what is this?”

“It’s crepes, baby. My mom used to make them when we were young, with your uncles. I made ones with chocolate and sugar, so take what you want, okay?”

“Can we save some for Mommy?”

“Of course.”

She smiles and starts eating happily, faster than usual. I may be more excited, though. I barely eat, just gulping down my coffee. I’m so anxious. I get dressed, a T-shirt and some jeans, and help Estelle get ready before we drive to the hospital.

I decide to make a stop on the way to buy some flowers for Elena’s discharge. Is that too much? Estelle can give it to her, it will be less awkward that way. If only I could calm down. I hurry to the hospital, park, and walk inside with Estelle.

Damian is already there, discussing with Elena and some guy from the medical staff. Calm down, calm down. I try to calm myself, holding our daughter’s hand a bit tighter. Elena notices me first, but turns back to the doctor.

“Is that all?”

“As long as you take the medicine and get lots of rest, you will be better in a few days, Miss Whitewood. Please don’t stand for too long, and be careful with your arm. I will schedule a check-up for you in three days, just to make sure.”

“About the hospital bill…”

“Elena, don’t,” says Damian with a frown. “Nora will scold us both. Don’t you dare talk about money.”

She sighs, turning to Damian.

“Can I at least say thank you?”

I see the slightest bit of a smirk on my brother’s face. Since when were these two so close? I let go of her hand, and Estelle runs to her mother.

“Mommy!”

“Baby star!”

She kneels down painfully to hug her daughter. Is it alright for her to be crouching? Her arm is still in a sling, and she looks tired too. I quickly join them, grabbing Estelle to carry her. Elena barely looks at me…

“Mommy, can you really leave now?”

“Yes, baby, I’m leaving the hospital.”

“Really? And you can come and live with Daddy and me? We painted my room! It will be dry in two days!”

Elena hesitates, looking at me. I take a deep breath.

“How about we discuss this a bit first? Maybe Mommy wants some breakfast too, baby?”

“We made some crepes!”

While she tells her mother all about her morning, Damian settles the last details with the hospital so that we can leave. Elena is obviously trying to avoid my eyes while talking to her daughter. Meanwhile, I take deep breaths, trying to calm down and act rationally. It had to happen sooner or later, right?

“Alright, it’s settled,” announces Damian. “I have to go home, Nora asked me to watch the kid this afternoon.”

“She’s not working?” I ask, worried.

“No, but Tonia is taking her shopping for the baby.”

“Didn’t you say you don’t want to know the gender yet?” asks Elena, surprised.

Damian nods.

“We don’t, but they still want to look for more baby toys and things to prepare for the birth. Nora is scared it will be premature like James. Anway…”

He sighs and says goodbye to us, giving a kiss to the girls before leaving.

Okay, now I’m left with the two girls. I take a deep breath and turn to Estelle.

“Do you want a hot chocolate, baby? So you can finish eating your crepes with Mommy?”

“Yes! Come, Mommy! Daddy, can we get another one for Mommy?”

“Of course, baby.”

Elena stays silent and follows her to the hospital cafeteria. It’s so awkward. I take a deep breath and follow them. I insist on paying for the drinks, getting myself an Americano and two hot chocolates for the girls, and we sit down, a bit uncomfortable.

“Do you like it, Mommy?”

“It’s good, sweetheart,” says Elena.

We stay silent a bit longer, and it’s the most awkward we’ve ever been. I really need to say something, now. It’s the time, if I ever want to make things right…

“Are you coming home with us now, Mommy?”

“I think I’ll go and live with Auntie Nora for now, baby star.”

Estelle immediately makes a sad face while looking at us, alternating between her and me, worried.

“But… Daddy has a lot of rooms… and the Disney movies… and he said you liked it at Daddy’s place before…”

She’s almost crying, and I immediately feel so guilty for it! I turn to Elena, talking very seriously.

“You could come to my place.”

“Oh, heck no, Nate. We are done.”

“I’m not asking you to get back together with me. I have a lot of spare rooms, and I can–”

“Your place is not a hotel, and I am not desperate. Nora can host me anytime, and we both know it.”

“Yes, but I want to see my daughter, and we can’t split her between my place and Damian’s all the time. And Nora is pregnant and tired; she can’t host all three of us.”

“I’m pretty sure Damian can lend me a room anytime I ask for it, Nathaniel.”

“Elena, I’m just asking you because of our daughter. You don’t have to get back with me, just consider living in the same place as me.”

“Nathaniel, do you even know what you’re saying! It’s not like we could just be roommates!”

“Why not?” I ask, very seriously. “Elena, you know I want you back. I’ll be very clear right now about that. I owe you a hundred apologies, and we need a good, long talk. I’m asking you to have it now, for Estelle’s sake. But my place would be better than a hospital cafeteria. You… You’re free to go back to Nora’s place with Estelle after that. All I’m asking is… you just give me time to talk to you before that. Please.”

She takes a deep breath, visibly conflicted.

“Nate, we already had that talk about four years ago.”

“You know I didn’t have all the pieces of the puzzle, Elena,” I try to argue. “It was unfair. I’m not saying it was your fault, but you can’t… I mean, anyone would have had doubts. You had my medical records and the paternity test–”

“I told you,” she immediately gets furious. “My cousin–!”

“Elena.”

I give her a second to calm down, and she glances towards Estelle, who’s staring at the two of us, anxious and a bit lost. She is holding on to her hot chocolate, trying to grasp what’s going on between me and her mom. I sigh.

“Elena, I’m just asking we go to my place for now to talk. I don’t want to just pick a random place, and Estelle’s stuff is there too, she can just watch a movie while we discuss calmly, like adults.”

“Mommy, Daddy and I watched Disney movies yesterday! It was very, very funny, and I even know the song a bit!”

Elena caresses her cheek, without answering me. She looks so conflicted, but I need her to agree. I’m desperate to patch things up between us, no matter how long it takes. And her coming back to that place where we have so many memories would be a huge step in that direction… She eventually sighs.

“Fine, but… just to talk, Nathaniel.”

“Of course,” I nod, relieved. “I promise, you’re more than welcome to stay at my place, but I won’t hold you back if you want to go to Nora’s.”

I grab her bag before she can change her mind, and we leave the hospital. Estelle happily walks between us, telling Elena all about her new room and the movies she watched at my place. I’m kind of glad she’s helping me out a lot without knowing.

Elena sits next to me in the passenger seat, but we don’t exchange one word; she silently stares at Silver City while I chat and entertain our daughter. Did she miss our city…?

We finally park in front of my residence and go upstairs. Does it bring back memories for her? Harry recognizes her and greets Estelle, professional as usual. The elevator ride is quick, and I let her step into my flat first… She glances around, but it probably hasn’t changed that much since the last time she came here, except for our daughter’s stuff… Should I have made some more family-friendly changes? No, that would be too much. Estelle runs to get her latest drawing.

“Look, Mommy! Daddy and I, we picked some really nice pencils! I did this yesterday!”

“It’s very pretty, honey.”

“Baby,” I ask her. “Can you be a good girl and watch another Disney movie? Mommy and I need to talk a bit.”

“Okay, Daddy! I remember how to pick a movie!”

She runs to grab the remote and climbs onto the couch, ready to watch. Meanwhile, Elena sighs, and I put her bag on the kitchen counter to leave her the choice of where she wants to settle, and I go to the fridge.

“Do you want something to drink?”

“I’m fine.”

I pour a cup of water, nervous as hell. I got her to come here, now what? This is what I’ve been hoping for, but she’s keeping her defenses up. Music from Estelle’s movie fills the room, not exactly ideal. I head to the balcony, and thankfully, Elena follows. I take a seat, hoping she’ll do the same.

“… You stopped smoking?” she asks, surprised.

“Yeah, about two years ago. I stopped a lot of things.”

If she knew the wreck I was after she left… I hit rock bottom before I managed to climb back up. First, I started drinking a lot. Isaac and my brothers tried to help me as much as they could, but… I was a wreck. I put myself in danger so many times, Damian lost his shit. It’s probably around that time I had my car accident… It took time, but I got better. A lot better. Damian thinks I went to the other end of the extreme, turning into a work and fitness junkie, but at least I don’t put myself in danger anymore… And now that Elena and Estelle are here, I couldn’t be more grateful. They both have no idea, but they’re my best reason to live.

“Alright. I guess we need to discuss some things about our daughter.”

“Elena…”

“Nathaniel, no.”

She stops me with a determined expression, and I’m forced to shut up.

“We will only discuss Estelle. Because she’s your daughter and if you have questions, I’m ready to answer them. Nothing else.”

“Elena, it’s not just Estelle I want to talk over with you. I know I really owe you an apology.”

“Nathaniel, I–”

“No, listen.”

I put my hand on hers. I’m the one who needs her to listen to me. I see she’s mad, she’s upset at me and rightfully so, but I need to speak up, at least once. I owe her that apology.

“Elena, I’m so, so sorry for not believing you back then. No matter the numbers, the tests, the hospital. I should have… I regretted it so many times, I swear. Even before I knew Estelle was really my baby, I wanted to bring you back and apologize. I didn’t even care who her father was, I just wanted you back. You have no idea… how many times Damian and Liam kept me from doing some really, really stupid things. I was a fucking idiot, Elena. Because I was blinded by the idea you could have been with someone else. I died of jealousy. I just couldn’t swallow it. When the results came back, I felt like you were betraying me a second time, and I lost it. I swear I never, ever meant for you to leave Silver City. I had no idea you would go somewhere I couldn’t reach you.”

“Nate, I didn’t just leave because of you. So many things happened back then. I had no choice. Yes, you were part of the problem, but… it wasn’t just about you.”

It wasn’t just because of me? Then what… I try to remember the situation back then, what else could have pushed her to leave not just me but the city…?

“Because of your pack? And your relationship to Nora?”

She growls, rolling her eyes.

“I’m not saying it wasn’t partially your fault! But yeah. Because of all that. And Estelle… As soon as I announced I was pregnant with your child, things became complicated with my pack.”

… What the fuck? Her pack pushed her to leave? For having my child?! I thought it was all my fault, but I never understood why she had to leave the city, and it turns out it was her pack’s doing?!

“Elena, why did you leave?” I insist.

It has to be more complicated than that. Given Elena’s personality, She wouldn’t have just left if she had any other choice. Nora is a royal, and her cousin… I glance towards Estelle, and that’s when it hits me.

“She’s… a Royal?”

She nods. No way… Now that explains a couple of things…

“Why didn’t you tell me? About your relationship with Nora?”

“It was so complicated, even for me, Nathaniel. I was barely sorting out who I was, no one wanted to talk to me about my origins. Even with Nora, we did nothing but guess until the truth came out.”

“So it’s true? You’re cousins?”

She nods, and goes on to explain to me everything I was missing so far: how she felt her bond with Nora, how they both looked for answers regarding their biological family, what she learned from her mentor and Sylviana. That’s a lot… I always knew she was special as a werewolf, but I had no idea how much.

“So that’s why you’re not fully Royal… but Estelle is?”

“Yes. Your Alpha blood was strong enough to awaken her Royal gene, or something like that. Daniel can explain it better than me.”

Moon Goddess… I would have never imagined our daughter would be that special. Well, I had no idea her mother was either. I am glad a lot more things make sense now, though.

“Okay,” I eventually mutter.

“That’s it?” she frowns. “Okay?”

“What did you expect me to say? My daughter is a Royal, and you are Nora’s cousin, though you’re not completely Royal because your mother was human. I am not saying I wouldn’t have wanted to know earlier, but it doesn’t change much. I want you and Estelle back.”

“She is your daughter, I never said otherwise,” she immediately says.

“You know what I mean, Elena. I still love you.”

Elena looks away from me; she probably wasn’t expecting that, but I’d rather be honest and blunt. I’m not giving up on either of them.

“Nathaniel, no.”

“I’m not going to do anything. I just needed you to know, Elena. I still love you, maybe even more than before.”

“Can we just focus on Estelle for now?”

I nod. I know I won’t convince her so easily… and I’m already happy with where we’re at.

“Okay,” she says. “I just want what’s best for her right now.”

“I still want both of you to stay here.”

I insist before she changes her mind or thinks there’s a better place for them to go, which I’m sure there isn’t.

“I understand you want to spend time with Estelle, but don’t include me in–”

“She is our daughter. And I don’t want us to have to split our time with her, Elena. I’m not asking you to think of me like that. I mean, I do want us to get back together, but I know the most important right now is that we both stay with her. I have this huge apartment with enough rooms you can lock anytime. Estelle likes it here, and I know you do too.”

I’m trying hard here, but I know I’ll have to respect her decision, whatever it is. I’m just hoping that now that she’s here, she’ll agree to stay. I want her and Estelle here, I really do. Not only do I not know how I could spend one more night without her near, but I’m terrified at the idea that she’ll put up more barriers and our relationship won’t be rekindled. But I have hope. Lots of it; I can see in her eyes she’s hesitating. Nora’s pregnant, and her pack kicked her out. I know I shouldn’t be happy about it, but I know that makes my place the most suitable home for the two of them. Moreover, we are a family. Estelle’s our daughter, and she likes it here. She’s waving at us from the couch, singing along to some Disney song.

Since she’s taking a while to answer, I decide to give her the time to think; at least she won’t make a rash decision and leave now.

“You can think about it until tonight, Elena. I know it’s complicated for you to forgive me, but I’m not going to change my mind about anything I said. So, whether you leave or you stay, it’s up to you. But I do want you here, and Estelle too, of course.”

“Daddy!”

Our daughter comes running, getting tired of watching us through the window. She runs to me, all excited with her pink cheeks.

“Daddy, in the movie, they were eating spaghetti Bolognese! With big meatballs too! Can we eat that for lunch?”

Elena suddenly laughs, and I’m completely confused. She smiles at me between her tears.

“I was making Bolognese before we left the house.”

“You made Bolognese?” I can’t help but ask, a bit surprised.

“Mommy burnt it! With crunchy parts!”

I laugh, while her mother dies with embarrassment.