Page 26 of His By Sunrise (Disreputable Dukes of Club Damnation #3)

Charlotte frowned. “Why did you need his help in the first place?”

“He was a solicitor before he took the title, a shoddy one, of course, and I needed advice because one of my investments had soured. I wanted to sue the man who killed the deal. I’d invested heavily in steel.”

“Was it simply another scheme?”

“No, another way to make an income to support my pregnant wife.”

She blew out a breath. “A gamble.”

“Much of investing is, but this wasn’t. Steel is still strong to this day, and it is how I’ve made quite a tidy fortune, but that is beside the point.

” He gave her a half-grin. “I have honest skills in investing and speculating, but I was ill-informed and lied to about this investment. Regardless, William slammed the door in my face, but that was a good thing, for it forced me to rely on myself, on my instincts, which I did.”

Charlotte pressed her lips together. Her eyes held a wealth of emotions. “What happened then?”

“I refused to give him another thought and went on with determination. By then, I’d found Club Damnation, and with the help of the men at the club, I overcame every challenge enough that I was confident enough to keep you happy... for a time.”

“I had no idea how hard you worked, what you’d gone through.” A few tears of her own fell to her cheeks. “I’m so sorry I misjudged you.”

Perhaps he’d done all that, involved himself in charities and causes as a way to find redemption. It felt... good to finally acknowledge it.

Her words were like a benediction. “It was all for us—my little family. And then I won this manor at cards, fairly and without contest. I knew then that I could see a future with you by my side. I wanted a place to raise a family away from the vices and sins of London. It made me work even harder.”

She snorted. “Yet you are still a part of that world in London.”

“Not as much as before.” And he’d worked damned hard to become what he was today—a man of substance, of character, with a reputation that might be bent, but he wasn’t a criminal.

“I slowly had this place renovated for you, and by the time we moved in, Olivia was talking and discovering the world around her, forming her own little personality. I’d even procured her a pony so she could begin riding lessons.

I was thrilled. In that moment, I was the richest man alive because I had the two of you. Everything was perfect.”

A half-stifled cry left her throat. “Then we fell apart. I miscarried our second child, fell into a depression, and we drifted apart because you were in London on business so much.”

“Yes.” His chest ached, but at least the story had been told. “I wanted to continue making money. I thought if I worked hard enough, you wouldn’t be ashamed of me.”

“I wasn’t. That wasn’t the reason I left...”

He nodded. “I realize that now, or at least a part of it.” When he met her gaze, he was leveled by the pain and need he found in her eyes.

“I wanted a large family, because I grew up as an only child with shitty parents. My mother was an actress. She left my father and I when I was quite young. My cousins all died of various illnesses or by violence. Then my father died of the drink while I was in prison. I missed the noise of family around me. But being in London, pursuing investments and leads meant I abandoned my family... ushered in the demise of my marriage...”

“No.” Charlotte openly cried now. “It wasn’t just that.

Of course, I was lonely, and raising a five-year-old by myself was difficult.

It was the miscarriage; I felt alone and unwanted, and I hated myself for losing our child.

” She accepted his handkerchief as her tears continued to fall.

“I felt I was being consumed by our relationship enough to lose my identity, to lose myself in you, in the wonderful carnal world of pleasure and pain you’d introduced me to.

I didn’t want that to be the only thing we had in common.

” As she shook her head, she came around his desk.

“I was also mourning the life I thought we’d have as well, but couldn’t, not after losing the baby.

There was a distance between us I didn’t have the strength to bridge. ”

“We both mucked up our marriage, but we can learn from that.” In an instant, he was out of his chair and closed the distance.

“We were distracted, allowed outside interference to come between us.” He cupped her cheek and wiped at the tears lingering there.

“Sometimes in life, the things you come up against aren’t fair.

You don’t have closure or the chance to make things right.

Fate gives you anger instead. For a time, it fuels you, but you must be careful, for it will blind you, destroy you if you let it fester. ”

“Then what happens?” She nuzzled into his palm, and he rejoiced at the trust she showed.

“You must find a way to let the anger, the disappointment, the guilt and regret, go. If you don’t, you’ll be left with none of the good things in life when you fall.”

“ If I fall.”

“You will. We all do when things hit the breaking point. Trust me on that. I have had many.”

“I’m sorry about what my father did. Especially since he cited your infidelity and alleged criminal past as the reasons for the break.” Her chin trembled. “That probably did more to damage your reputation than anything else.”

“I was annoyed at the time, of course, but now? It doesn’t matter. My character is unharmed. My friends and associates know the sort of man I am, and now you do too.” He shrugged. “I’m trying to be better every day.”

“I know, but I should have protested Papa’s intentions. You must think I’m a coward.” Tears welled in her eyes.

“Shhh. We all have our weak points.” Daring much, he drew the pad of his thumb along her lower lip.

God, this woman was both so fragile yet so damned strong.

“Shed those feelings, Charlotte. Perhaps that is what I’m doing too by having you back with me.

This is a catalyst for us both, I think.

” But would it result in them renewing those sacred vows?

Tossing the divorce away and starting again?

“Who will catch me?” she asked in a barely-there whisper. So much need reflected in those brandy-hued eyes that desire smacked into him like a blow.

“I will, if you give me that right again. If you can bring yourself to trust me, to know that I never wanted anything except to be worthy of you.”

“Oh, Edwin...” She looked so lost that his protective instincts welled. “I need you to catch me, after all this time, I still need you,” she whispered, and another tear fell.

Well, damn.

There was only so much willpower a man could tap into before he broke.

Edwin crushed his lips to hers in a savage kiss that told her in no uncertain terms he wanted her and the tortured mess they’d both gone through to reach this point.

By the time they wrenched apart, they were breathless.

He sought her gaze with his. “You don’t have to remain strong if you don’t wish it.

I’m here to catch you... as I will be for the rest of our lives if that is what you want. ”

Was it too premature to admit that?

“I want to forget, or to pretend that we’re not at odds.

..” She tugged his shirttail from his breeches and then shoved her hands beneath his shirt.

The heat of her seared his skin, ignited his blood.

His body caught fire and was fueled by the stark want in her brown eyes.

“And frankly, I think you and I are moving toward something even greater than what we had before.”

“Ah, Char. I feel that too. We should discuss it.”

“Not now, not this afternoon. I’m not ready.”

“Fair enough.” Never could he resist her. “Do you wish for me to discipline you, spank you for daring to talk to William?”

“You saw?” Fear jumped into her eyes.

“I did.”

She shook her head. “I didn’t invite him; he merely assumed, and when he kissed me, I immediately shoved him away.”

“I know. I saw that too.” He continued to peer into her eyes. “Do you want him?”

“No.” His beautiful former wife shook her head. “Not anymore. I have found—or perhaps rediscovered—something far more wonderful.”

“Oh, God.” Edwin embraced her, kissed her hard so there were no doubts of how much he desired her.

Over and over, he devoured her mouth as if she’d be instantly ripped from his life.

She did the same, gave as good as she got, and soon they were panting, hands searching, fingers trailing over familiar skin, lost to the heat between them.

As desire overrode common sense, he carried her to the desk and deposited her on it. “You never answered my question.”

“Which was?”

“Do you want me to spank you, to send you to the edge in that manner?”

“Later tonight, perhaps. Right now? I only want you, in a raw, messy, primal way that tells me you’ve never stopped wanting me in your life.” She tugged him closer. “That we should never have divorced in the first place. I want you without games or distractions to hide behind.”

The honesty in her words fed his ego as he settled between her naturally splayed legs.

With a hand at her back, he yanked down her bodice, bared her breasts from the layers of fabric, then pleasured them, sucking the erect nubs of her nipples.

Her soft cries of enjoyment spurred him onward, and by the time she reached for his frontfalls, his length was engorged to the point of pain.

As his member sprang from his trousers, he paused long enough to appreciate Char in all her glory.

Skin flushed, legs parted, skirting rucked up to her hips, eyes shining, she looked the part of a woman far gone in desire- and dare he hope- in love, even?

If he were fortunate, and his heart squeezed from the thought.

“Why do you hesitate?”

Need for her spiked. Circumstances weren’t ideal but taking her on the desk would have to do. But then, that never seemed to matter when it came to carnal endeavors between them.

“When we come together like this? It’s as if the years apart never happened.

” He shoved up yards of her skirting, and when she was bared to his gaze, he gripped her hips and brought her forward until she balanced on the edge of the desk.

As passion drove him, he kissed her, found her center with the tip of his member, and then thrust swiftly in until he was fully seated in her honeyed heat.

“Oh, God,” he whispered against her lips.

Every time, she welcomed him back with enthusiasm, and the years ceased to matter.

Charlotte clutched at his forearms as she moaned. Need mirrored in her eyes. “In many ways, I wish they hadn’t, but perhaps they needed to so we could finally realize what mattered most.”

“I feel that as well.” Being with Char like this, after sharing what had been his greatest shame, it felt right, as if he’d been waiting for this exact moment since the damned divorce.

His thrusts were frantic, hard, and deep.

At one point, he paused inside her merely to enjoy the blissful sensations she created within him.

Charlotte held his head between her hands, brought his forehead to hers, and kissed him like a woman desperate for the air he breathed.

Edwin kissed her back. Never had the connection between them been so strong.

It was heaven-sent, and he promised himself not to take it for granted.

“I wanted this coupling to last, but I want you too damned badly.” Then, he straightened as urgency compelled him to finish. He held her hips, the outside of her thighs to go as deep as he could, stroking again and again into this woman who’d managed to upend his life once more.

Perhaps for the final time if fate smiled upon him.

All too soon his stones drew tight and hot pleasure rushed through his length.

He thrust quicker and faster. When she broke with a cry upon her lips and tears in her eyes, he kissed her, taking most of the sound into himself as he fell into an intense release that left him shattered and sated.

How could it still be so between them after everything?

This was much like he’d felt when they’d been first married.

He ground his pelvis into hers to prolong the joy, but the act was over, and he wasn’t ready to let her go.

His limbs shook as she clung to him. Obviously, the same sentiment hit her, so Edwin removed them both to one of the chairs.

After he sank into the leather, he cradled her on his lap, her legs on either side of him.

As their breathing rasped and chests heaved, when his pulse pounded and he felt the flutter of hers beneath his fingertips and their frantic breathing slowly calmed, he vowed once more to make this his reality.

“Charlotte...” What? Was he brave enough to voice his budding feelings?

“Don’t, Edwin, not yet.” Shadows haunted her eyes. “I’m not strong enough to lose you again.” Finality rang in her voice.

His heart constricted. “You are the one who left me. Why do you think I’ll do the same?”

“You still have investments and business partners.”

“Yes, of course. It is how I make my living. I only find more respectable ones now. And I will need to be in London at times, but I want you to come with me. Be with me.” In all the ways that mattered.

“Oh.” Her eyes rounded in surprise.

His chest tightened. “Will you let me court you a second time?” he asked in a rush. I am a bacon-brained idiot to offer myself up for rejection.

“I...” With a sigh, she slid from his lap. “Let me think about it, for this is quite a large step for us both.”

“It is, but I remain ever hopeful.” He couldn’t keep the grin from his face. “I have never once given up on having my family with me again.”

She nodded, and the delicate tendons of her throat worked with a hard swallow. “Neither have I.” Then she bussed his cheek. “I am going to retrieve my flowers then lie down for a nap, but I will see you a bit later. Perhaps we can go for a walk if it’s not raining?”

“There is nothing else I’d rather do.” And another piece of his heart flew into her keeping.

Please, God, let us find forever together this time.