Page 15 of Hiding From Laughter

Ashton

“But…well…”

I’d lost track of the question but that was probably because my twirly straw was fun to look at. “You usually don’t let me have more than one.”

Never more than two.

I wasn’t a lightweight but he liked rules.

But I wasn’t trying to use any heavy machinery…I didn’t even know where my glue gun was.

“Yes. Please.”

I was smart and ignored the gremlins in the back of my head as I handed Micha my glass. “It’s fun to watch it come up through my straw.”

“I thought you’d like that.”

Micha looked so happy it was suspicious. “The red color makes it more fun too.”

He was really smart.

Yes. That was suspicious too.

Micha never thought that much about alcohol, mostly because it took so much to affect him, he didn’t bother with it. That was curious enough to make my brain try to work, but it needed help, so I took several more long sips of my drink while I worked on getting my brain cells in one place.

He tried talking to me about my work and his work and the yard work, but it just didn’t stick around. I didn’t have enough leftover brains to do that much multitasking. So I nodded and sucked and let the three cells I could find whirl around.

“You’re being sneaky.”

Oh.

His smirk said I might’ve interrupted something.

What had he been talking about?

“I…I had a good day at work.”

Was that right? “And…and mowing the lawn is a good idea.”

I was positive those were appropriate responses to something he’d said in the past few minutes but the way he was coughing said otherwise.

I wasn’t so drunk I didn’t realize he was covering up laughter.

A few more sips and I might not have noticed, though.

Yep, he was being sneaky.

“Ugh. It’s about the weekend. You want to talk. That’s a terrible idea.”

It was so bad I took another sip. “You’re so sneaky.”

And I was so full.

“Those were sneaky too.”

I couldn’t help being stupid and cuddly when I was full. It was how food worked. It took blood from my brain and shoved it all to my stomach. That just made me stupid.

He was so fucking sneaky.

He even pretended to look confused until I waved my hand at the grill. “Oh. Well, you bought the steaks.”

I had?

No. It wasn’t my fault.

“You did this.”

He was sneaky. “It’s very rude.”

So was the way he was back to snickering and coughing.

When he finally caught his breath, he leaned back in his chair and shrugged, looking sexy in the low light of the back yard.

That was cheating too.

Looking sexy was always cheating…it made me stupid.

“You kill my brains really easily.”

Yep. Cheating.

“Thank you.”

Micha was clearly proud of himself. “You didn’t need them tonight anyway, though.”

Ugh.

How rude.

“I always need them. How will I worry without them?”

How would I keep my thoughts to myself without them? “I’ll talk without my brains.”

Duh.

Micha shrugged. “That’s a chance I was willing to take.”

He was so cavalier about the problem…the big problem…the huge problem.

“That’s rude.”

For some reason he didn’t realize I’d insulted him and he was back to snickering.

“That’s rude too.”

How was I supposed to explain that when my drink was half gone already?

“Well, I love you more than anything in the world, so I think you can talk to me without thinking about worries or words.”

Micha was a pain in the butt and shrugged again when I groaned. “Let’s just try it and see what happens.”

“I’ll happen.”

I always happened. “You just…ugh.”

He needed to lap me.

Yes.

That was his job.

“Do it. Just do it.”

Carefully setting my drink down, I closed my eyes and held out my arms. “I won’t fight you.”

“You are the cutest nut I’ve ever met.”

He was being ridiculous, but he was also being smart because I heard him get up from his chair. “Can you be dramatically carried and hold your drink at the same time?”

Hmm?

“No.”

And I didn’t want to be sticky like that. “You can make me sticky later.”

Cum was better than booze if we were going to get messy.

Hmm.

He laughed again.

That might not have been just in my head.

“I agree.”

Micha laughed as he picked me up, but my groan probably had something to do with it. And the moan. And the sigh.

Okay, maybe I was a little bit funny.

Just a tiny bit.

“Yes. You are. Especially when you’re drunk as a skunk.”

He made a thinking sound as he shifted me around in his arms and opened the back door. “If you get too dramatic, I’m going to ask what you had for lunch. If there’d been food in your stomach that first drink wouldn’t have hit so hard.”

Shoot.

My body was cheating too.

Tattletale.

“I’m not dramatic.”

There was no reason for him to do something ridiculous like start asking about lunch. “I’m…I’m cute.”

Yes. He thought I was cute.

“You’re right.”

Micha sat us down on the couch and kissed my head as he snuggled me tighter against him. “You’re very cute, especially when you’re drunk and dramatic and trying not to talk to me about everything in your head.”

“It’s leaking out.”

Brain diapers should be a thing. “I keep trying to catch it but it’s not working.”

Everything was sneaky tonight, including me.

I sighed, making sure Micha knew I was frustrated by that, but he chuckled. “I’ll catch your brains, so I don’t want you to worry about leaks or escapes.”

Ugh.

“When you’re done with your sound effects, I’d like to know what you thought of the scene last night.”

He was so rude he didn’t even sound worried.

Didn’t he know he was supposed to ease me into that conversation?

So rude.

“I’ll never be done and you can’t make me tell you that I liked it. I know my contract. I don’t have to tell you that. Just colors. I’m green. I’m stupid and I might need more special…special whatever that was. But I’m green and that’s all I have to say.”

Contracts were hard but I was pretty sure that was what mine said.

Maybe.

“I’m glad you’re green.”

Micha was such a pain in the butt he kissed my head again and snuggled me so my face was pressed against his neck. “I’m going to tell you my green parts.”

For fuck’s sake.

“That’s cheating.”

It had to be. “You can’t make me know what you like.”

Micha’s chest jerked but he didn’t laugh out loud that time. “You can get up and walk away at any point, but I feel like talking.”

“I’ll…”

I’d do something…but what? “I’ll go down on you. I will.”

He snorted.

“At this point I’m not sure you could find your dick, much less mine.”

Mumbling something about lunch and drunk nuts…which might’ve been about me…he sighed. “I liked being in control. That’s not a surprise, though.”

“No.”

He was exhausting. “You like that and you like taking care of me.”

I was a lot of work but he seemed to like it.

There was no accounting for taste or common sense.

“So the whole thing…the stuff…that was all something you liked because you controlled me so much you had to take care of me.”

I still didn’t understand making more work and liking it, but Micha was confusing sometimes.

“You’re really smart when you only have a few brains left.”

Micha rubbed my back as he kissed my forehead. “I’m glad you understand.”

“That’s the easy part.”

My parts were hard. His were easy. “The quiet toy keeps me from being a pain in the ass. The coloring kept me busy. I didn’t annoy either of us. My arms. You made me have to sit still. You fed me. Yeah. That’s the easy part. I can see why you liked it.”

I was the confusing part.

Why had I liked it?

“Because you like it when I take care of you.”

Micha decided to be a mind reader and a pain in the butt. “You like it when I cuddle you and your brain really seemed to like not having to do grown-up stuff at all. You relaxed and actually got a good night’s sleep.”

“It was probably the orgasm and bubbles. The combination might be magic. Or science? Something like that.”

I’d have looked that up online but I was kind of afraid what the search results would look like.

Shit.

“I forgot…you were…you were supposed to use my ass.”

How had I forgotten? “And…and this morning we were late because…well, you distracted us.”

He’d snuggled me until I’d used the stupid diaper again.

He was a sneaky fucker.

But he was kinda cute and he gave me kisses and he bought me books.

“I’m glad it seems like you have to keep me then.”

Micha just had to keep proving he was psychotic. No. Psychic.

Ugh.

He just kept laughing.

“That’s going to make me seasick. You have to stop bouncing me around. Giggle still. Yes. Very still.”

He was so big he was like a boat. Fuck. He laughed again. “No. You have to sit very still. You’re making the world move. God, you’re big.”

It was so sexy.

“Stop grabbing your dick. You can’t distract us yet.”

Micha was being completely unreasonable and took my hands, pinning them against my thighs. “That’s better. I’ll let you play with your cock once we’ve had our talk.”

Talk?

“I talked.”

I talked about random stupid shit, but I talked. “I’m done.”

Nope.

Couldn’t move.

Couldn’t touch my dick.

“I’m stuck.”

Admitting that made the dick situation even worse. “Now I really need to come. Please?”

Nope.

Still couldn’t move.

“Where were we before you distracted me? Oh. Yes. What I liked.”

He sighed like he was proud of himself for figuring it out. “I already said control and taking care of you. That’s where we got off track. You and your dick.”

“You like that too. It’s green for you.”

He was easily entertained sometimes. “You liked the diaper because it kind of controls my dick and it makes me wiggly. You like that too.”

He laughed again.

“The boat is moving.”

He had to stop that.

“I’m the boat, nut.”

My boat hugged me tighter. “But yes, that’s probably part of why I like the diaper part. I also like seeing you lose control and hearing you laugh and knowing I get to take care of you after. So yeah, back to that caretaking part.”

Caretaker Doms were kind of insane…and high maintenance.

Why had I never realized that before?

“Because I’ve been too careful and backed off when you started getting nervous.”

His tone sounded like he wanted to say duh but he was too grown-up for that. “You’re testing my patience, nut.”

“It’s not my fault you keep reading my mind.”

He was just rude. “You’re not supposed to do that.”

Every book said that was just bad manners.

“Stay focused.”

Micha groaned, probably because he knew he’d been rude when he read my mind. “I’m not going to be nice any longer.”

“Then will you fuck me? I like it when you get frustrated and kind of mean.”

Not really mean. Micha didn’t do mean. But he was sexy when he growled at me and said I was driving him batshit. “If I drive you insane for a few more minutes would that be enough to get you to bend me over the couch again? Slowly. The seasickness might come back if we go fast.”

God.

He was bouncing me again…if I barfed it wasn’t going to be my fault.

“You are a wonderfully constant reminder of why I love you.”

He was trying to make me crazy and seasick at the same time. “I will fuck you hard if you can tell me two things you liked about our scene last night and if you remember the drunk rules from the contract.”

He was so much work sometimes.

“Why am I asking about the contract rules, nut?”

He had his stubborn voice on, so I knew better than to drag out the answer.

“Because if I can’t remember the rules then you can’t fuck me. Being…imb…imp…no…inebriated. Yes, inebriated means we have to be careful.”

Well, he thought we had to be careful. I thought I belonged to him and he should be able to use me whenever drunk me or sober me decided it was a good idea.

“That’s right.”

He seemed happy I remembered that lecture because I got another kiss. “So…two things you liked first…once you make me happy then I’ll make you happy.”

There was something…

“We’re both getting happy.”

Yes. That was what I’d missed. “That bribe doesn’t work.”

Ugh.

“Stop rocking the boat.”

That did not help keep the boat steady.

“Two things.”

The stubborn tone was back even though it was still giggly.

“Um…”

Two things. I could do two things. He had to already know two things I liked anyway. He could read my mind. “I like the way the diaper rubs my dick. Dry. Yes. And…and I really like how happy it makes you. So we can do it again tomorrow. Green. You’re going to be really happy.”

So happy he groaned?

“I’m going to give you an order with more fine print next time.”

Mumbling something about dragging out new information, Micha sighed. “And the contract?”

Contract?

Oh.

Yes.

Ha.

Almost forgot that one.

Three things I didn’t want to do…I could figure that out even with two fruity drinks…or had it been three? Oh well, that didn’t matter. Opinions. Drunk me always had opinions. Usually it was about fun things like crafting and which dildo was perfect to ride, not fuck.

“Um…I’m thinking…not distracted.”

Yep. He’d worry if I got too distracted. “I don’t want to be spanked.”

He snorted.

“It doesn’t matter if it’s easy answers.”

That was the rule and he couldn’t change it. “Um, I…I don’t want to be diapered tonight because I want to go to bed naked.”

That was new, he made thinking sounds and he liked it.

“Good boy. That’s a good opinion.”

Only my Dom wanted a sub with extra opinions…it had to be a caretaker thing.

“I…I don’t…”

I don’t want to play the game any longer. “Um, I don’t want to go to bed sticky, so you have to make sure I’m cleaned up. I don’t…I don’t want to get a shower in the morning and then try to get…that…what did you call it?”

Ugh.

I sat up.

I looked at him.

He was frowning.

Had I confused us both?

“The headspace?”

Perfect. Micha was so smart even when I was drunk. “Yes. That.”

Whatever it meant.

“I understand. Thorough cleaning tonight, so we can go right into that relaxed headspace in the morning.”

Micha smiled, giving me a quick peck as I wiggled around so I was straddling his lap. “That’s very good thinking, baby.”

Yay.

Leaning in, I rested my forehead against his. “Good thinking means good fucking.”

I’d been really smart to make sure that was in our contract too.

Sober me was amazing…drunk me was horny.

“You are insane.”

Micha wanted to giggle but he gave me another kiss instead. “But I love that about you, baby.”

Yay.

Three cheers for getting fucked.