Page 11 of Hearts of Fairlake (Men of Fairlake #8)

GRANT

The mixer's rhythmic sound melded with the oven's hum, filling the air with the smell of flour, yeast, and baking bread. The feel of the dough in my hand was soft but growing firmer as I kneaded it. Of course, machines could do it for me, and I owned them, but nothing beat the feel of the dough in my hands as I worked. These were the sights, sounds, and smells I was used to, part of the list of things that calmed me, soothing the ragged edges of my mood.

Not that my mood was foul at the moment, but the anticipation of the festival in only a few hours was enough to make my nerves tighten to the point of discomfort. The mayor had requested I make a personal showing to the few stalls that had been set up for my bakery, and considering how good the people of this town had been to me, it had been impossible to turn the request down. It seemed that Louise's hard work on the social media accounts for the bakery had done their job, and the mayor thought it would be good for my face to be shown.

I had made appearances at other festivals, but those had been more locally focused. This anniversary celebration was broadcast from one end of the country to the other. It had been helped along by Louise, who the mayor had personally sought out after hearing she was the one who had been managing the social media accounts to great success. I wasn't exactly sure how he’d found that out, but Louise swore up and down she hadn't told him, and she had never lied to me.

Quite the opposite, really, to the point that even I, who was straightforward and not prone to subtlety, sometimes wished she would dial things back a little or at least consider keeping her opinions to herself. Then again, if she did those things, she wouldn't be Louise. I could only imagine the meeting between Louise and the mayor after he'd sought her help, and I felt pity for the man, who I considered to be a little high-strung, sensitive, and not all that assertive. She had never said, but I was quite sure Louise had run the negotiations, and I hoped she’d managed to come away with benefits and pay for her efforts.

Prodding the dough, I decided it was done and moved to grab what I needed to roll it out. Again, there were machines but for this particular crust, I wanted to make sure it was done by hand. While I wasn't the sort to believe things made by machines weren't good enough, that was impractical. There was something special about something made by hand.

I hummed as I worked, something I blamed on my brother. He had always done it in those rare moments where he was focused on something so intensely he lost track of the world around him. I didn't hear it as much, but according to Luke, Felix was doing it more than he ever did, especially after being trained and given a job at Adam's workshop.

There was something...amusing that at the end of the day, Felix and I had both found a passion and career in creating things, though in his case, it was offset by the fact that he also repaired things. It seemed fitting for him to have learned to repair when so much of his life had been broken by the choices he'd made. There was a symbolism behind it that I appreciated, but it was mostly nice to see my brother finally find a comfortable place in the world rather than being subject to its whimsy.

A thump from the front drew my attention away from the dough, and I grunted when I heard a familiar voice. “Well, good morning!"

"Good morning, Louise," I called with a sigh, knowing my peace and quiet were officially ending. She was more excited about the festival than most people. Then again, that meant she was going to be at the stalls, able to meet all sorts of people. That was precisely why I’d been more than happy to put the gregarious woman at the front of my shop years ago when I'd been hiring.

"What?" came my brother's voice. "I don't get a good morning?"

Yes, my morning was officially no longer quiet. “And good morning to you too, Felix. I suppose you didn't think to speak up, or perhaps you didn't think you would be heard over Louise."

"Isn't it cute how he thinks he's witty?" I heard Louise ask Felix as if I couldn't hear her.

"What are you both doing here?" I wondered. "Louise, you weren't set to work until later when we need to start setting up the stalls."

"Did you or did you not say you wanted to have a morning run so people could still get their morning donuts, pastries, and whatever the hell else you've put poor Devin up to?"

"He volunteered to get everything I normally make in the mornings shipped over," I retorted. "He's more than capable of the task."

Felix appeared with an armful of boxes that he set near the door. "Am I allowed to point out that you've made a lot of progress as a person and that you're so willing to hand the reins of your work over to other people?"

I blinked at the boxes. “Both Devin and Luke have proven more than capable of handling things. I have seen an uptick in business for them both, and a majority of reviews coming in are extremely positive. Why should I feel any differently about this?"

Felix raised a brow. “Because this is stuff coming out of your original bakery. You're trusting Devin to make it to your standards."

I didn't know why that made me uncomfortable, but I shifted uneasily. “He worked here for some time before I decided to have him take over the Fovel location. If there’s anyone I trust to know precisely how I want things done, it’s him."

"You know, it is possible you can accept that you've grown as a person and that I'm complimenting you on that fact," Felix said with a snort.

"Is it just the two of you?" I wondered, knowing I was changing the subject but not caring. There were other things to worry about besides my apparent growth.

He gave me a knowing look before shrugging. “Luke's at home until I head back so he can make the deliveries from Devin's. Louise will stay here while Luke takes everything we have here to the stalls to begin setting up. Afterward, Devin will close up as you agreed and return to spend the rest of the day at the festival. I'm going to start the setup process, and then Louise will come in after you close here and 'fix' everything I got 'wrong' despite her painstaking and exhaustive description of what she wants."

"I see believing you're witty is a family trait," Louise said brightly from the front room, followed by more thumps.

"What's with the boxes?" I asked, knowing I had zero say in how the day's events would go. Louise was handling presentation, while everyone but me handled the logistics outside of baking. Not that I couldn't have done it, but between Luke, Felix, Devin, Louise, and even my husband, I’d been outvoted and told I would take on only the load for food preparation.

In a way, I could see Felix's point because the idea of handing so much responsibility and organization to others would have once filled me with a dread that would have driven me absolutely crazy. Now, though, I could see the strengths of the people who worked for me, and I understood my limitations...for the most part. It still left a twitchy feeling inside to leave so much to others, but I knew there was no way I could manage the entire load without losing my mind.

Louise popped her head in, and I saw she’d painted half her hair red and the other half blue. I didn't know how she managed, but there were also white stars on each side. "Where is Sylas?"

"Sleeping in, as I requested, until he helps man the booths later," I said, knowing I should be used to her hair changes but unable to help myself. "You realize this is an anniversary celebration for the town, not the Fourth of July, right?"

She stared at me momentarily before her hand touched her hair thoughtfully. "It took me forever to decide what to color it. In the end, Fairlake doesn't have any town colors, so I went with the country's instead. It's still celebratory, and hell, maybe it'll strike up aconversation."

"Or attract attention," I said. "That stands out when people expect...well, small town."

"If they think my hair is weird for a small town, wait until they discover the absurd number of homos in this town," she said with a snort .

"She has a point," Felix noted with a frown. "Why have I never realized that before?"

"Beats me," she said with a shrug. "The whole town seems to attract or make them."

"Make...them?" I wondered, knowing that was not how sexuality worked, but unable to stop myself from hearing her supposed logic.

"Well, yeah, this one went and bagged Sylas' assistant despite him being straight," she said, jamming a finger toward Felix, who didn't look bothered in the slightest, only grinned. "And then there's you, who somehow managed to bag a whole ass celebrity even though the chances of that are, like, next to zero. Then there's that cute cop married to his former straight best friend. Those two cuties from the firehouse, the police chief who just happened to fall for the former straight best friend's former brother-in-law. Then there's Devin also getting with his former best friend turned love of his life, who really needs to get on top of proposing. Am I forgetting anyone?"

"There's that gay cop and EMT that a bunch of the people you just mentioned helped a while ago," Felix said.

"Oh, right," Louise said with a nod. "That's a lot of formerly straight, bi, and gay men in this town, which is just weird. I love it, but that doesn't mean it's not weird."

"I believe that is simply a coincidence of noticeable proportions rather than anything specific," I said carefully.

She gave me a disbelieving look. “Hey, I wasn't saying it was because of anything. I was just saying it's really weird. But hell, for all we know, there is something in the water."

"Hope it doesn't make the frogs gay," Felix said, making Louise snort.

"I...what?" I asked in confusion.

"I am not going to explain the context around an old meme to you," Louise said with a shake of her head. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have things to do before I start."

I didn't bother to ask and let her disappear back up front. Whenever she was in a full-blown mania, it was simply better to stay out of her way and, if you were one of her chosen helpers, to do as she told you. Otherwise, you were likely to get run down while trying to figure out what was going on in her head. Clearly, Felix had the same thought because with her gone, he quickly scooted out of sight of the doorway to join me at the table, albeit from the other side, where he wouldn't get in my way.

"I take it Luke is currently home with Gray, then?" I asked, resuming my attempts to make the dough cooperate.

"He is," Felix said carefully, undoubtedly feeling out my mood as best he could. "It's only been a few days, so we're trying to make sure one of us is with him as much as possible. It's a little tricky with us both working, but we've more or less made it work."

"It might have been simpler if both of you hadn't been tied to businesses in high demand for the festival," I pointed out.

"Are you making conversation or a critique?"

"A little of both. It was quite sudden, this fostering."

"It was an emergency fostering," Felix said with a shake of his head. "If we hadn't agreed, he would have gone somewhere else. Or possibly into the system to await another set of foster parents."

I felt my stomach twist uncomfortably at the idea. Both my brother and I knew how rough that situation could be on a child. "You also made it far harder on you and Luke, considering the current circumstances. It would have been easier on the two of you if you’d waited until the festival was over. "

"Which would have still left him up shit creek without a paddle."

I paused. “Is this because of the boy, or because you can't stand the idea of standing by and seeing a child thrown into the system when he could have been with you and Luke?"

"What, are they mutually exclusive?"

"Don't be flippant."

"I'm not. But I'm not going to pretend my decisions are made in a vacuum, made up of only the stuff happening at that moment," he said with a shrug, leaning on the table. "At the end of the day, I decided to get into the fostering program to...I don't know, make up for what happened to us, to try to be something good in a system that creates so much apathy and cruelty. And at the same time, it's a way for me to feel out if I'm ready to have a family like Luke has always wanted."

"You can't let his wishes on something as serious as this influence such a big decision," I told him, not wanting to make it sound like I was accusing Luke of pushing or Felix of being weak. Still, I knew how easily a loved one could influence your choices, especially a spouse.

"He hasn’t made that wish known often. We don't talk about it much. I think he's afraid it’ll push me toward that decision. Kind of annoying, having someone baby me like that, but it's Luke, and I can forgive him because he's never done anything meant to harm me," he said with a smile. "But I know that's something he wants, and he’s willing to give up that dream if I don't want it. So, this is a way for me to figure it out...and if I'm even up to the task."

"I can't argue with the logic of making sure beforehand," I said. "I suppose this is as good a trial run as you get...though perhaps fostering is, as was put to me once, starting out at hard mode."

Felix grinned. “Let me guess...Sylas? "

I hesitated, not sure if I had trodden on a toe. “We...have discussed it, yes."

Felix shook his head, still smiling. "Yeah, you and pretty much everyone who knows it. Buncha gossips, I swear."

"It wasn't gossip ," I said, slightly offended at the accusation. "It's a serious topic that affects the people we love and care about. It was bound to come up in conversation."

Felix chuckled. “Calm down, I meant it as a tease, not accusing you of anything. Luke and I knew it was a big step for us as a couple, and he won't admit it, but it's a huge step for me. People were bound to start talking, and it wasn't like we were keeping it a secret."

I wouldn't say it aloud, but I wouldn't lie to myself either. I wondered if Felix was up for the task, not just raising a child but raising one who’d been through a lot before coming to live with him and Luke. I had no doubt my brother was genuine in his intention to do his best and had come a long way from the man I’d witnessed making disasters for years.

That did not mean that taking on the monumental task was something he was fully prepared for. I understood that no one was ready to raise a child, not really, and especially not one who’d already been through a lot. However, my brother had also been through a lot, and while I understood that it meant he had a specialized view of life and trauma, that did not mean he was technically ready to deal with the reality.

"I can practically feel the doubt rolling off you," Felix said, maintaining his smile, but it faltered.

"I don't mean to..." I took a break to collect my thoughts so they came out as correct as possible. I needed my brother to understand that I was just worried, not that I thought he couldn't do it. "I just know this is a lot to ask of anyone, and you have even doubted whether or not you're ready. But as you also pointed out, no one would achieve anything if they waited until they were ready. I just...do not wish to see you get involved in something that could cause you more harm."

Felix thought about that for a moment before shrugging. “Well, that's how life goes. Like you said, I can't wait until I'm ready, but I also know there's a good chance I could screw up, and this could blow up in my face. But...I'm confident that after all the progress I've made and the people around me, even if it doesn't work out, I'll still be able to get through in one piece."

"Well,” I relented. "You’re much more stable than you've ever been, no offense."

"Absolutely none taken," he said with a chuckle.

"I just...I worry. I know you don't want me to, but I do."

"And maybe just like you've learned to let people help you, so have I. Maybe we've both learned a thing or two about growing up and understanding that letting people help isn't a sign that we don't know what we're doing or that we're weak, but that we're loved."

"Maybe we did at that," I said with a smile.

"Then yes, I'm sure this is what I want to do right now, and I'm sure it was the right decision," he said, his eyes softening. "And you should see him, . He reminds me of us at that age. I'm glad you're going to meet him today."

That surprised me. “You're bringing him to the festival? I thought you were trying to keep things quiet for him a little longer?"

Felix gave a helpless shrug. “Well, that was our original plan. But then Gray heard about the festival, and it was the first time he’d shown real interest in anything other than sleeping. Which is saying something because he...doesn't say much."

"Really?"

"Really. He's not much of a talker, which you'd think would work with Luke instead of me because I'm way more yappy than he is, but I guess all those years of dealing with you have made me pretty good at reading between the silent lines."

"I can't tell if that is supposed to be an insult, so I’ll stick with 'you are welcome' instead."

Felix stared at me for a moment before letting out a snort. “I don't know why because you'd think I'd have adjusted by now, but you'd think I'd have gotten used to the fact that your sense of humor has been growing in recent years. But it keeps catching me off guard."

"Sylas says it's a lifetime work in progress."

"Make it two."

"I have no idea why everyone thinks you're the better brother. You're as rude as others have accused me of being."

Felix pushed away from the table with a laugh. “That's because I'm adorable. Luke tells me that all the time, and since I've never known him to lie, who am I not to believe him?"

"Someone who desperately wants their husband to tell them they're cute."

"What, and you don't like it when Sylas calls you cute?"

"No," I said honestly. "He doesn't, and it would be strange if he did."

"Hmm," he said after a moment and then nodded. "Yeah, someone sentimental and mushy wouldn't be a good fit for you."

"People like that don't typically want to be around me for long," I agreed.

"He probably tells you your dick is amazing and that you're hot," Felix said to my horror but not surprise. "And I bet you act bashful about it most of the time, but deep down, there's a part of you that lives for it when he does that kind of shit."

"And brotherly bonding time has come to an end for some reason," I muttered. "Now, if you would kindly go see if Louise needs any help, that would be appreciated. I need to focus on this pie while juggling everything else that needs to be done today."

The cackle he gave helped something slide into place in my chest and I found myself calm once more as I resumed my work.

"Bread! Pastries! Muffins! Slices of pie! Come get all that and more!" Louise called out merrily beside me, making me wince as I wondered if my hearing was going to survive the day or if I was going to end up with hearing aids by the end of the weekend.

"I don't think they heard you in the next county," Sylas told her from where he was lounging in one of the foldable lawn chairs Louise had packed for when we didn't need to be on our feet. "Perhaps we could get you a bullhorn so they could hear you down in Denver."

"Don't encourage her," I complained, gently rubbing my ringing ear. "And, Louise, please warn me before you start shouting again. I would rather keep my hearing if it's all the same to you."

"Does that mean there's something wrong with being deaf?" a new voice piped up, and I looked over to see Ayla watching me with a smirk.

"If I could avoid it, I would. I'd rather not add to the problems I already have," I told her without batting an eye. I had come to know Ayla fairly well over the past few years, not enough to know everything, but enough to know that, like so many people in my life, she was prone to teasing and taunting.

"That your way of telling me that if you had the chance to get rid of what makes you special, you would?" she asked, cocking her head.

"Absolutely," I said without hesitation. "It would have made my life far simpler."

"Even if that meant you'd miss out on what you have now?" she wondered.

I didn't answer right away...couldn't, actually. Undoubtedly, if I’d had better parents, ones who had done more for me or at least didn't outright abuse me and try to sell me, would I have found my passion? Would I have bothered to come to Fairlake, where I would inevitably meet the people around me? Would I have met Sylas and fallen in love? Have the kind of real relationship I had with my brother?

There were too many variables and chances for things to be different, which was more anathema to me than ever. The answer was simple. “You make a strong point. It would be nice not to have the problems I do, but if it meant losing all I have now, then the price is too great."

"Huh," Ayla said thoughtfully. "I'll have to get back to you on that one. Now, a slice of strawberry if you please."

"I got you, hun," Louise said warmly, turning to fetch it. "Where's Annie? She was looking for you earlier."

"I ditched her," Ayla said. "And I'm not a hun."

"Well, I'm going to call you that anyway. Call it a product of knowing you since you were younger," Louise said, not batting an eye as she handed over the container with the pie. "Consider that slice on the house."

Ayla held up a card. “It's on my dad, so take the money."

"Ah, well, that's a different story," Louise said, taking the card and plugging it into the machine.

"I saw your interview," Ayla said, staring past me.

"Yeah? How'd I look?" Sylas asked.

"Like shit."

"Ah well, and now? "

"Like a bum."

"Perfect. That means retirement has really settled in for me."

Ayla smiled at that one. “It kinda suits you."

"Retirement?"

"Being a bum."

"Funny, that sounds like something my mother would say. Which is not a compliment for the record."

Ayla's small smile turned into a wider, knowing one. "I know a thing or two about moms like that."

"So I've heard," Sylas said, and I didn't have to look behind me to know he was sprawled out in the seat, legs spread, arms on the rests, head back with sunglasses on. He hadn't been back in Fairlake for long, but I had to admit, there was something different about him. It had been his express desire to find a nice, peaceful life for a while in Fairlake, and he had taken to that endeavor with enthusiasm.

It bothered me a little, seeing him so lazy, but at the same time, it was nice to see him relaxed. I hadn't realized until after his retirement, but even when he'd been here between roles, there had always been a weight that followed him around. When he'd returned this final time, it had been gone, and a far more at ease and less worried version of my husband now existed.

It certainly didn't hurt that since his retirement had been a semi-surprise for his mother, she’d refused to speak with him...as if that were a punishment. If Celia Goner thought that was somehow weighing on Sylas' mind, she couldn't be farther from the truth. On the other hand, I thought it more likely she was so furious with her son that she couldn't bear to speak with him. It was bad enough that he’d spent his life constantly balking at her rules and doing pretty much whatever he wanted. It grew worse when he'd finally stood up to her completely when it came to Felix and me, something I would be forever grateful to him and his sister for.

Now, he'd gone and retired before she had a chance to have her say in the matter. I wouldn't be surprised if she were fuming for weeks, if not months.

"Well, as much as I'd love to sit around and discuss mommy issues, a thoroughly fascinating and not at all depressing topic of conversation," Ayla said, cracking open the container she'd been given. "I think I'm going to find something else to do. Supposedly, there's a dunk tank around here, and I want to see which volunteer is in there now. I hope it's Chase."

Louise turned to her. “Chase? There is no way in heaven or hell that man signed himself up for something like that."

"No, but his name definitely ended up on the list," Ayla said with a wry smirk. "And I want to be there if his name gets called."

I watched her go. “Who would have done something like that without his permission?"

Louise snorted. “It could have been anyone in his life, from what I know. My money would be either Bennett or Ayla herself, though from what I hear, that man of his can also be quite devious."

I turned to Sylas. “Would you ever do anything like that to me?"

He smirked, still staring up into the sky. "Not on your life or mine. But we're different than those two, and our relationship is different. Maybe Chase's man can get away with that sort of thing because maybe Chase wouldn't be as bothered by a prank like that, where you would be greatly upset. I don't mind teasing you, it's good for you now and then, but a prank like that is too far for you."

It was direct and descriptive but also lacked the characteristic wariness Sylas had shown when speaking to me about serious things when we first got to know one another. It seemed Felix and I weren't the only ones who’d made some personal progress and learned a few things along the way. I reminded myself to ask Felix later what he thought had changed on Luke's end if anything.

"Uh oh," my brother's voice piped up. "Someone's got that face that means he's either irritated or thinking real hard about something serious."

I glanced over to see Luke was with him. “How can you tell the difference?"

"Depends on what he says next," Felix said. "Or if Sylas tells on him."

"And ruin your guessing game? Absolutely not," Sylas said. "Luke."

"Lazy ass," Luke grunted back with a smirk. Those two had always taunted one another, Luke more so than Sylas. I was that it wasn't uncommon with siblings, which I hadn't believed until Felix and I had reached a point where we could have a conversation that didn't involve treading on each other's feelings.

"Goddamn right," Sylas said with a sigh.

"Language," Louise said, leaning over the stall. "And this...must be Gray."

Curiosity got the better of me, and I leaned forward to see the boy Luke and Felix had taken into their home. I still wasn't great at reading expressions or moods, but there was a definite surliness that looked out of place on someone so young. That was until someone from the crowd shouted unusually loudly, and I watched his head snap toward the noise, taking a small step back.

Ah, not angry, afraid.

Luke's hand slid up to rest lightly on Gray's shoulder, and while that didn't make the boy relax, he didn't pull away either. "This is Gray. We've been going around, seeing what there is to see. We've already run into some people we know."

"Exciting," Louise said, still looking down at Gray. "Meet anyone interesting?"

Gray peered back at her for a few heartbeats before slowly shrugging and pulling his eyes away. I couldn't necessarily blame him. Louise could be a bit much if you weren't used to her. I wasn't detecting any real attitude from him, just an awkwardness and a wariness of those he didn't know.

"A few people," Felix said with a shrug of his own. "Just enough to say hi and all that. He did seem to like Julian and Bennett, though, so that's something."

I heard Sylas' chair creak behind me. “A cop and a firefighter? Likes men in uniform, a guy after my own heart."

"He's a little young for all that," I muttered.

Sylas' voice dropped so they couldn't hear him. “For sex, yeah. But I had crushes at his age."

"Sylas," I sighed, speaking louder than I meant, but my nerves were already tight enough with all the noise and confusion of so many people.

Gray perked up. “Goner?"

His voice was almost lost in the noise, but there was enough strength in his surprise for me to hear him. Sylas didn't miss a beat, though, getting to his feet and leaning on the stall counter. “I'm not surprised to hear my last name. I'm just surprised it's taken this long."

"Probably because you look like you just rolled out of bed after a weekend-long bender," Luke said with a snort.

"Hey now, I've had plenty of those in the past, and I didn't look bad," Sylas said with a snort. He squinted down at Gray. “Not going to lie, the stuff I do isn't usually aimed at someone your age."

"I still saw some," Gray said, shrugging again.

The more I watched him, the more I understood what Felix had been trying to say when we'd talked this morning. There were some strong similarities to us, or more precisely, me. Before I'd grown a little more sure of myself and comfortable in my own skin, I had come off as antisocial and wary of everything around me. That little shrug, as if to say, 'I don't really care right now' but also 'I'm not sure I should be having this conversation' was something I recognized with sickening understanding because I had done the exact same thing.

"Alright," Sylas said, laying his arms on the counter as Louise slid away to talk to someone browsing the collection of bread. "Dare I ask which one you saw...or should I say, which one you liked most?"

Gray again hesitated, his dark blue eyes flicking around to see that he was being watched, although Luke was doing a better job than Felix and I at hiding it. "Uh...Moore Pain."

"Moore Pain?" Sylas asked, and I could practically hear him groaning on the inside.

When we'd first started dating, I had refused to see any of his work. I had never been able to explain why I refused, especially when he was so obvious in his praise and appreciation of what I did. Yet, every time I tried to bring up a movie of his, I found myself flicking it off before I saw even a moment of his acting. It wasn't until I asked Felix if he'd watched any, which sparked Felix to offer to have a movie night while Sylas had been away for a shoot, before I finally saw his movies.

It was odd at first, seeing the man I loved on the screen behaving in a way that was foreign to who he was as a person. Of course, I knew that was the nature of acting, and I had to say Sylas managed it. I honestly didn't know what he’d meant when he said he didn't have the spark for that sort of thing when the only way I could see the man I knew was from the occasional glimpses that flashed from his characters.

By the end of that weekend, I had seen most of his movies, though none had been to my taste. 'Moore Pain' had been at the bottom of my list of enjoyable movies, and I knew it was Sylas's least favorite. The plot had been threadbare to the point of being nonexistent, the characters had no real development or depth despite how hard the actors had tried to add life to them, and the violence had been over the top and unnecessary, in my opinion.

"Ah, right," Sylas said, and I had to admire his ability to restrain showing his distaste to the boy. "That was the Hollywood summer blockbuster...or at least that's what they said."

"Huh?" Gray asked, then looked surprised that the quiet, brief question had left his mouth.

"It means they expected it to be a big deal during the summer, which is when they love to push big action movies like Moore Pain."

"Oh," Gray said, looking at his feet. "My...mom got it a while ago. She liked your movies. Always said you were handsome...when Dad wasn't around. That would have made him mad."

His face scrunched painfully at the mention of his parents, and I couldn't tell if he was angry or just plain upset. I didn't know anything about Gray's past, but undoubtedly, if he’d been in the system, then it wasn’t a happy story. I wondered if my brother had chosen him simply because the boy reminded him of us somehow or if the boy's story had touched his heart and enticed him to choose him over the others.

Not that I was going to ask or would expect Felix to tell me. We had come too close to our past being leaked to the world once before, and we knew the value of privacy. People would ultimately ask those kinds of questions and I hoped that Luke, and especially Felix, were ready to field them. Well-meaning people could accidentally tread on a sensitive subject, either asking an offensive question or unknowingly making a comment that could upset Gray. It was going to be up to them to take care of those people and any fallout from Gray himself.

Sylas, however, was an expert in dealing with other people and made a point not to acknowledge the boy's discomfort. "Well, why don't you check with those two to see if you can have something from the stall? Maybe we can find out if there's another of my movies you like."

Gray looked up at him nervously before sliding his eyes over to Felix, who was smiling at him. My brother winked. “Be my guest. Sylas is a close friend, so it's probably best you get to know him while you're with us."

Gray's eyes grew wide. “Wait, you know him? I thought he was just...here."

"I live here," Sylas told him.

"And I'm married to him," I added, amused at the shock growing on his face. It was perfect for getting rid of that somber expression that had made him look far too old, and instead, he just looked like a kid meeting a celebrity and learning things about him that he never expected.

"Wow," Gray said, looking up at Felix and Luke. "And you two know him too?"

"Know him? That's my best friend and former boss," Luke said with a laugh. "If there's anything you want to know about him, you should ask me, not him. Because he won't tell you everything."

Felix gave Sylas a sidelong glance and then his husband. “Uh, from what I've heard, maybe you shouldn't tell him some things."

"Well, yeah," Luke said with a snort. "I know better than that. And you don't know everything anyway. "

"Oh?" Felix wondered, his brow shooting up. "Am I ever going to hear those stories?"

Sylas narrowed his eyes at Luke. “If he's thinking of a couple of the things I'm thinking of, he had better not. Some things are better off going to the grave with us, thanks."

Now I was curious as well and peered at him. “Do I know these stories you're avoiding?"

"You do not, and you will not," he said, giving Luke a dirty look. "And I'd like to think you’d be smart enough not to have brought it up in the first place."

"Why can't I know?" I wondered, not necessarily bothered by the idea of being left out but simply curious about what could be so bad that he didn't want anyone but himself and Luke to know about it. "Is it truly that bad?"

"Like...divorce worthy?" Felix wondered, now deciding to help...or maybe just be his impish self. It wasn't easy to tell. Him grinning could be a sign, but it could also be a sign he was enjoying himself rather than trying to start anything.

"No!" Sylas protested, eyes wide as he stared at my brother in horror. "What the fu?—"

"Language," Louise chided, clearly listening to the conversation while helping customers.

"What the fudge is wrong with you?" Sylas demanded, scowling at him.

"I don't think we have time for me to go over the full list," Felix said, and now I could see his grin was him stirring up trouble.

"You can swear around me. I heard it all the time," Gray said with a shrug, watching us with what I thought was confusion and interest, which...I didn't blame him. It was probably the strangest conversation he'd heard adults have, especially when two of the three were supposed to be his legal, albeit temporary, guardians.

"First of all, just because someone else does something wrong doesn't mean you can," Luke told him. "Secondly, there are families and really little kids here who don't need to hear Sylas' foul mouth going off."

"Oh," Gray said, looking around as if noticing the crowds for the first time. In reality, it might have been the first time he was aware of them on a conscious level rather than just background noise that stressed him out.

"I definitely think you should at least tell those stories," Felix said.

Sylas raised a brow. “Uh-huh, and have you told Luke all your stories then?"

"That's...different," Felix said, eyes going wide. Undoubtedly, my brother had a vast array of stories he would probably prefer no one ever find out. Most of which I didn't know and didn't want to know. At his worst moments, Felix had turned to drugs, partying, and sex to drown out the storm in his head. Though from what Sylas had told me about his life before, perhaps his and Felix's stories weren't all that dissimilar. Though I thought it was probably safe to assume the parties were more expensive, the drugs and drinks of a higher quality. Even retired, Sylas had more money than I knew what to do with, and it had probably been thrown at things he should have avoided.

"Hmm, yes, I don't think I want to know these stories," I said, frowning as the possibilities cycled through my mind.

"See?" Sylas said, pointing at me. "He doesn't want to know."

"I kind of do," Felix said.

"Me too," Gray piped up, clearly growing more comfortable. "You guys are weird."

"Tell us something we don't know," Luke said with a sigh, squeezing Felix's arm. "And you know that no matter what you told me, I'm not going to leave you or judge you, right?"

"I know," Felix said quickly, and while he sounded like he meant it, I didn't think he believed it completely. My brother had lived a troubled, if storied life, and deep down, he was always worried he would lose people because of who he was or who he had been. "But there's just some things that don't need to be said, you know?"

"I get it," Luke said and then nodded toward Sylas. "Go ahead, Gray. We're going to stick around here a little longer, so you can go hang out with Sylas if you want."

Gray's eyes went wide with excitement, but he barely hesitated when Sylas waved him to the other side of the booth. Once more, the kid he was supposed to be was shining on his face as he walked around the stall. Sylas walked with him back toward where we kept the stock and the chairs, one of which Sylas pulled out so Gray would have somewhere to sit while they chatted.

"Are you sure it's alright?" I asked now they were out of earshot.

Felix snorted. “Are you kidding? That's the most I've seen out of him for the past few days. If it takes having a few stars in his eyes over your husband, by all means, let him have at it."

"Has it been difficult?" I asked, cocking my head. "You seemed enthusiastic earlier."

"I am," Felix said with a shake of his head. "But, he's just been?—"

"Quiet, a little moody, and wary of us like crazy," Luke said with a sigh. "We were warned he's pretty wary of men, but...at least he's managed to talk to us. And he seems happy with his room. He even agreed to go with Felix after the festival to see if they can't find some stuff to make it feel more like his. And some clothes."

"Did he not have any?" I wondered.

"He...did, but you remember," Felix said with a sad smile, " showing up with only a garbage bag full of whatever crap you could stuff in there."

"Ah, yes," I said, thinking that was one of those things I would rather forget.

"It'll just take time," Luke said with a confident smile. "Plus, Uncle Sylas over there is doing wonders at loosening him up. I guess we should have introduced Gray to the family sooner."

"We're still waiting at least a couple of months before we make him endure your family," Felix said with a snort, and I nodded in agreement. I'd met them only once when Luke and Felix had got married. They were energetic and enthusiastic and congregated in large, loud groups whenever they were around one another. It was a little difficult to picture someone as mild-mannered and steady as Luke coming from that environment, but he had let it roll off his back like it was nothing. Meanwhile, I was left to try to find spaces that weren't filled with their noise.

"Endure," Luke snorted and then thought about it. "Alright, yeah. My family would be a little much for him. I'll talk to Mom. She can keep my sisters in check."

"Good call," Felix said, a small smile on his face. "Huh, I know he's got a niece that he dotes on, but this is the first time I've seen him deal with a kid."

"He's great with kids," Luke said. "C'mon, I want to grab one of those spicy margaritas before they run out."

I turned to see what they were talking about and felt something flutter and settle in my stomach. Sylas was still chatting merrily with Gray, who was returning the same enthusiasm. I couldn't make out what they were saying, but I watched Sylas gesticulate wildly, probably telling some story about a mishap on one of his sets. Whatever story he was telling, he had Gray's undivided attention as he laughed at something Sylas said .

We'd both agreed we would never have kids, even if, at the time of the discussion, I'd thought Sylas would be a quite capable parent. I, on the other hand, was not built to raise children. They were too noisy, messy, and demanding for someone of my temperament to be able to do anything effectively. I would end up messing the kid up, or it would come down to Sylas having to raise them while I took a background role, which wasn't fair to either of us or a potential child.

Now, watching him as he effortlessly made Gray feel at ease, I felt a slight twinge of regret. I stood by the decision, but I suppose from here on out, I would have to see if Sylas couldn't take on a role with Gray and perhaps any other children Luke and Felix might end up fostering. It seemed to work for him, and it struck me that, like Felix, I’d never really known Sylas could be good with kids.

It seemed there was always something new to discover about the person you loved, and like now, sometimes it was things that helped you fall in love with them all over again.