Page 24 of Hearts Adrift (A Texas Beach Town Romance #4)

I ask myself this the following evening when I decide, for the first time in a week, to go out. And, predictably, it’s to the Easy Breezy I go, in search of Cooper’s long-sought-after advice. The man’s a vault. I can tell him everything, even this, and it won’t go anywhere.

Once again, it’s not Cooper I find: “Dude, like, does it really matter if it’s just a fling? Have sex with him. Do it already. Enjoy it. Boink the bastard.”

Chase gives terrible advice.

“It matters to me if it’s a fling,” I say right back.

“I’ve been saying it for weeks that you should have a hot rebound.

” He picks up his glass and swirls the liquid inside.

We’re at a table on the outdoor patio section of the Easy Breezy.

It’s starting to get dark, but there are still a lot of people out on the beach.

I think it’s someone’s bachelor party or something.

“And if it becomes real, great, and if it doesn’t, also great! No headache afterwards.”

“I don’t want a rebound . I want more. I’d thought we were building something more, but maybe …” I sigh and sink against the banister to my side. “It’s all in my head.”

“What was this guy’s name again?”

I look away and clear my throat. “Cal.”

“Cal? Like, short for Calvin or something?”

“Sure.”

Chase chuckles, sitting back. “Finn and Cal … I’m not hearing bells with that combo. Cal. Sounds like a straight-curious dude headed back to his dusty little town after the weekend’s over. Probably has a wife and six kids, too.”

Or a nationwide scandal involving his fist and the big-name director whose jaw it collided with . “It never felt like a fling. I know he didn’t come here for sex. He came for an escape from … from a situation in his life.”

“Hmm, okay …”

“Things just got serious between us for a minute. Then hot. Then fun. And serious again. We’re growing closer … but I’m worried that the moment his ‘situation’ ends, he’ll be outta here. Where does that leave me?”

“But … you haven’t actually had sex yet?”

I frown at Chase across the table. “No.”

“Easy fix. Just do the do with him.”

I sigh. “Did you even listen to anything I just said?”

“You’re making all of this too complicated, dude. Just do it. Boink him. You’re clearly into him, he’s clearly into you. The math isn’t complicated.”

The math is more complicated than you can possibly imagine, Mr. Chase . Of course I don’t say that. I just slump against the table with a sigh and stare off toward the beach.

I have to be honest with myself. How did I think this would end? With River and I getting together? That if the day comes that this scandal blows over, he’s not going to head back home to his huge life as a movie star?

But the way he looks into my eyes …

The words he says …

How he captures me with poetry and makes me feel like I’m the only person on this island worth his breath.

But how can I trust it? Chase wants to talk math?

How about the math of how tiny a number I am in the grand life of a guy as big as River Wolfe?

Did I seriously think he was falling for me?

Imagining a life with me here in this small, washed-up beach town?

Am I really that desperate to have a boyfriend again after the demise of me and Theo?

“Just boink him,” mutters Chase again before downing the rest of his drink, burping, then gazing off at the hotties on the beach, for whatever reason constantly discounting himself as one of them.

“Oh, hey, you hitting up Teegan’s party this weekend?

Cooper should be there with Seany, if you wanted to catch up with him. ” He pauses. “I think.”

The last thing I need is one of Teegan’s parties.

And maybe I already know what advice the wiser and more grounded Cooper would give me: End it with River. Definitively. Protect your heart.

I only closed the door between me and River.

I need to fix the lock, too—and throw away the key.

While I drive home, I go over what I’ll say to River.

Even after parking, I have a speech in my head, ready to say it’s over, to apologize for the extra pressure I’ve laid on him, and to move on.

It’s not his fault I interpreted what’s going on between us as anything more than him relieving stress in his difficult situation.

I can’t imagine the burden he’s being crushed beneath with this unfair scandal, and I won’t begin to pretend I know how that feels.

The world’s eyes are on him. It must be a nightmare.

Upon entering the house, however, I find both of my sisters and my father in the foyer by the stairs—Brooke seated on the first step, Heather and my dad standing next to her, and a ton of tension on their faces.

Then they all turn to me.

Oh no.

The jig is up, I just know it.

Brooke couldn’t keep the secret. Heather caught River. Dad, too. Everything just crashed right to the ground while I was blowing off steam at the Easy like a careless fool.

Then my dad smiles. “And there he is, man of the hour. Your ears must’ve been turning red.”

I freeze.

Or maybe they didn’t find out?

Heather comes up to me. “You’ve really got a hell of a lot of nerve, little brother, keeping this secret from me.”

Or maybe they did …? “What’s … What’s going on?”

Heather hooks her arm into mine—a thing I’m fairly sure she hasn’t done since we were teens—and puts on a slightly alarming grin.

“But if there’s any better way to heal you from a breakup, I don’t know it.

” We walk to the stairs, arm-in-arm, where she stops and rubs my shoulder.

“I don’t know whether you’re crazy or a mad genius. ”

“Probably a touch of both,” teases my dad.

I have to twist my eyes onto Brooke’s for a semblance of an idea what the fuck is going on.

And it’s she who gives me a grimace of apology and spreads her hands. “Sorry, bro. Had to … tell them about what we’ve been working on these past few days. Y’know. The … super neat idea you had … about being … my big headline guy … at the kissing booth.”

Her eyes tell a whole other story.

She was cornered. Had to cover somehow.

And this is the harebrained bullshit she weaved to keep my dad and other sister off the scent.

“Kissing booth,” I mutter. “Right … That.”

“What a perfect idea,” says Heather, squeezing my arm so tight, she could snap it straight off. “Kiss the Prince of Dreamwood Isle. A kiss with beachside royalty. It is, and I cannot stress this enough, the perfect promotion.”

“Perfect indeed,” agrees my father through a choked laugh, then pats and squeezes my other arm as if trying to snap that one off, too. Then he lowers his voice and gives me a sharp, knowing look. “Excellent business idea.”

And now this idea has turned into something my dad thinks I came up with to help save the Fair.

Yet another secret neither of my sisters are aware of.

That’s all I am lately. A knotted-up ball of secrets and confusion and misdirected anxiety.

“You know what? It is such a rare night lately that all of us are home,” points out our dad. He smiles at Brooke. “Didn’t you say you’ve been itching for a movie night for a long time? Why don’t we make that happen tonight?”

Brooke’s eyes flicker back and forth between me and him. “I, um … well …”

I jump in. “Movies aren’t my thing. And I’m not really feeling it tonight. Maybe we—”

“Don’t you guys go weaseling out of family time like you two always do!

” teases Heather, causing Brooke and I to freeze.

“We’re doing this! I’ll go set everything up.

Does our seven-speaker sound system even work anymore?

I’ll go check.” She releases my arm, mercifully allowing blood circulation at last, and hurries off around the corner.

Brooke and I share a look.

A look that begs a conversation after said movie.

Because next, my dad ushers us both to the kitchen to help him with our impromptu movie night snacks.

Then all of us are spread out on the couch and armchairs in the living room.

The movie starts—something vaguely ringing a bell called The Quiet Monster —and I cuddle my tub of popcorn while imagining River hiding in the guestroom upstairs, possibly having heard all of this.

Maybe he’s right. I should stop lying to my family and just tell them he’s here. They’d understand, wouldn’t they?

The second I look over at Heather curled up in her favorite armchair, I realize no, she definitely wouldn’t.

She would explode . The potential scandal it’d unleash upon the Fair, for us to be harboring River Wolfe in our home and casting a shadow upon us—and just as she started to like me again since breaking the heart she alleges Theo has.

Not to mention my confusing knot of emotions when it comes to River himself.

I’m not thrilled with how we left things at my bedroom door.

I had a whole speech planned to give him after coming home tonight, down to different pivot paths I’d take depending on how he reacted.

Now I’m choking down those words alongside a tub of popcorn.

Then the opening scene starts. Hard cut to a face.

River’s.

Close-up. Tortured expression. Dripping wet bangs and eyes glistening with emotion, right away. As if this is his actual face right now, projected onto our TV.

I meet Brooke’s eyes across the room. She’s already looking right back, perhaps sharing a similar inward panic. She grimaces at me as if in apology.

I grimace right back, accepting it.

Then we lock in, and I watch the first film I’ve seen in years—a film that happens to star an actor who, by totally insane circumstances, is hiding in our guestroom upstairs.

But just three minutes in, and I forget it’s River. He’s someone else—a man battling his demons. Is he a good person? Bad? Is there such a thing as either, or are we just quiet monsters suppressing our appetites all our lives?

I find myself attached to his character right away. Then hurting alongside him. Hoping alongside him. Rooting for him … then hating him.

I’m not sure seeing a film starring River Wolfe was all that great an idea in my current state of mind.

I was, until an hour ago when this movie first started, prepared entirely to sever ties with him, friend-zone myself for good, and apologize for complicating his stay here in Dreamwood.

I would let my sister help him, keep out of their way, and tend to the task of apparently preventing my own family’s financial demise—for which I’ve allegedly donated my lips, which warrants an entirely different conversation I will be having with my sister very, very soon.

But now as I sit here, fully engaged in a story centered around a person who is not River Wolfe yet looks exactly like him, I can’t help what my heart’s doing as it tugs for him in every single scene.

I can’t help remembering how he touched me so tenderly and caringly on the couch in that bungalow.

How he tended to my pain. How he listened as I poured my heart out.

How he looked into my eyes when we sat together in the shaded and secluded Cottonwood Cove, feeling like we were the only people on the whole island.

How he’s been to me while living with him upstairs.

How he checks up on me. How he smiles …

I can’t deny the way he makes me feel any more than I can deny what seeing him on the TV does for my soul.

Letting go of River won’t be as easy as I expected.

Suddenly the screen freezes, and we’re made aware of Heather holding the remote. “So sorry,” she says, “but if I don’t go and take a piss right now …”

“Me, too,” admits Dad with a lighthearted laugh, and the two of them hop off the couch and hurry away.

Brooke and I meet each other’s eyes.

Then we quickly scoot together and pour it all out. “I did not know this was the movie they’d pick—” she hisses.

“It’s fine, it’s fine. What the heck was that about me being your kissing booth prince? I said Chase would do it!”

“I’m so, so sorry, I panicked,” she whimpers, wincing. “Heather showed up out of the blue. I had to rush my ass downstairs. Then Dad came home, and I was trying to keep them both away from upstairs, but you know when the two of them get together, they—”

“—work each other up, yeah,” I finish for her. “So they didn’t see River …?”

“Of course not! But I had to cover up what I was really doing, and the very first thing I thought of was the kissing booth. You know how genius strikes me under pressure—”

“Genius?? You could’ve just said Chase instead of—!”

“It’s too late! They’re obsessed with the idea.”

“Now I’m headlining your mononucleosis booth—”

“ I said I’m sorry! ”

“—and everything else is messed up.” I let out a heavy sigh. “I hope it didn’t spook River too much.”

“Well … actually …”

I turn to her. “What?”

She peers over the back of the couch, as if sensing Dad or Heather returning, then lowers her voice. “I don’t know when it happened, but … he snuck out.”

“He snuck out??”

“Returned to the bungalow. I guess he figured it’s safe again.

He left a message on our guest line. It was in code.

He requested takeout from Easy Squeezy. He meant Easy Breezy, obviously, but they don’t do takeout, so I figured he meant he …

wanted to see you.” She comes even closer and lowers her voice to a near whisper.

“Just between us. Please tell me the truth. I’ve been watching you guys over this past week.

Tell me … is there something serious going on between you guys? Like, a real, actual thing-thing?”

Dear sister, please allow me to introduce you to the question of the day .

But before I can answer, Heather returns, and while we wait patiently on Dad, my sisters start exchanging opinions of the movie so far while I sulk on the couch drowning in my troubled thoughts.

On the TV screen ahead of me is a frozen screenshot of River’s face looking just as uneasy as I feel, bangs wet and dangling, eyes full of tension, and lips parted and plush.

I wonder if I can even honor Brooke’s lie of agreeing to be her Prince of Dreamwood Isle.

If I can even stomach kissing anyone else.

If my one condition for headlining the booth is if it’s only River Wolfe waiting in that line, only River that I kiss, ten times, a hundred, again and again, and no one else at all.