Page 22 of Hearts Adrift (A Texas Beach Town Romance #4)

For an actor, I sure can be shit at reading people.

Am I ruining everything we’ve been building over our time together, pushing myself onto him like this? I should have learned by now in life that my intensity helps nothing. It only suffocates the people around me.

What is it about Finn that makes his rejection hurt way worse than anyone else?

I watch him for a while longer, unsure what to say or do as he stands there at that window.

He’s so worried about his sister. Rightfully.

He doesn’t really know me, not truly. He’s afraid of everything crashing down onto him and his family.

And for what? A big-shot actor who is so extra that he requires more than one hiding place on this isle?

I’m the one who chose this place to stay. I brought this burden on him—this burden he definitely didn’t ask for.

It’s a wonder he hasn’t kicked me out already.

Sent me packing.

Told me to go back to the bungalow, that it isn’t his or his sister’s problem.

“It’s not so easy for me,” he says. “To do this. To … let loose and have fun with someone new. I’ve never had the chance.

Theo was my only boyfriend.” He peers away from the window.

“I’m sorry if I’ve been weird. You have a lot going on, too.

My sister is just trying to help. And you probably see me as … a lovely distraction from it all.”

“Distraction?” I nearly laugh out.

“You have to understand, River, my heart can’t tell the difference between this sexual adventure we’re having …

and … l-love. I’ve never had a hookup in my life.

Not even once. Do you know what that’s like?

I’ve only ever been in a serious relationship.

This whole experience with you …” His arms cross tighter, hugging himself.

“It’s freaking me out a little bit. I don’t know how to process it. ”

“You’re not a distraction, Finn.”

“Maybe I … do want this to be something real. Maybe I want this to be more than some fun thing that happened to you in your … your exciting little escape-from-Hollywood chapter of your life. I don’t want to be just a chapter.”

“Hey, hey.” I come up to his side by the window. “You are not just a chapter, Finn. Trust me. A guy like you? You’re, like … the whole fucking book.”

“And even books can get tiresome. Then you set them aside, forget about them, and they become a paperweight.”

“Is that your fear? You think I’m gonna forget about you when I go?”

Forget about you …

When I go …

Yeah, perhaps I could’ve thought my words over more before they flew out of my stupid mouth.

“ When you go …” he says under his breath, sounding like those words are three arrows I just struck him with like some kind of anti-Cupid.

“Sorry,” I quickly blurt. “That’s not—I didn’t mean—”

“It’s okay. I already knew.” He faces me.

“Who am I to have expected something real could come out of this?” He snorts and gestures at himself.

“Me? Some puffed-up beach rat from a town you can’t even find on a map?

And you? A star on the rise who probably lives in a house out in LA twice the size of this one?

Hey,” he says, cutting me off when I’m about to tell him to stop talking himself down.

“I don’t have any bad feelings. Let’s just be adults about this and keep everything … professional.”

Professional? “Finn …”

“You need somewhere to hide,” he goes on, ignoring me.

“The bungalow is potentially compromised, so … you should stay here. I’ll set up the guestroom.

Besides, you’ll be more accessible to Brooke this way, if she needs you for her online crusade to save your image.

It’s a win/win. See? We can be adults about this. ”

I take hold of his hands, pulling his crossed arms apart. “You said something to me last night just before falling asleep. You said that I deserved someone to … but didn’t finish your sentence. Someone to … what?”

His eyes drop to my chest, like he’s forgotten.

“Y’know what I think you were gonna say?” I bring his hands to me, pulling him closer. “I deserve someone to see me like a human being. A flawed and fucked-up human being like anyone else.” I catch his eyes with mine. “That’s what you’ve been since we met. I need that in my life.”

I’ve captured him. Reeled him back in. The dreams are alive in his eyes again when he peers at me, forgetting his spiel about us being adults and keeping it professional.

“I believe you,” he says, then gently slips his hands out and presses mine to my chest. “That’s why I’m doing this.”

“Doing what, exactly? Backing away? That isn’t what you wanted to do an hour ago.” I can’t help myself when I let the charm turn on and my words turn flirty. “When we were on that beach with my head stuffed under your shirt.”

He gnaws on his lip and mutters, “River …”

“Then a hot minute ago when my head was … stuffed in another place.”

“We should cool this down. Between us.”

“And I think we should heat it up.”

“It’s for the best,” he states firm enough to cause me to freeze.

“For … both of us,” he adds more softly.

“You’re in a unique situation. And I sympathize with that.

But I have a family and a business to protect.

You also have to protect your business. We should …

We should be smarter than … than whatever’s going on between us. ”

“So there is something going on.”

“No one uses the guestroom upstairs. The house is empty most of the day. You can stay here.”

“In other words, there’s hope for us?”

“We can’t tell my dad or Heather about this. They stay mostly downstairs anyway.”

I frown. “Finn, I don’t want you to lie to your family.”

“Thanks, but …” He steps back. “… I need to. They can’t know.”

My foot bounces in place. I want to wrap him up in my arms right now. I’m not sure I can contain myself a second longer. “Finn …”

“I’ll prepare your room.” Then after a glorious moment of hesitation where his beautiful eyes flick to mine, he goes at last. I’m left standing by the window, heart pounding.