Page 25 of Healing Her (Pulse Medical #1)

“ T hank you for the nice ride.” Jen shook the hand of her Uber driver and made herself summon up a smile from somewhere. “I’ll give you a great rating, everything was wonderful.”

“Thank you, ma’am,” the nice young man replied, ducking his head with a bashful grin.

He’d been a delight to talk to during the ride, a handsome young aspiring actor from Tennessee who was Ubering to make ends meet.

His stories about his single mama back home in Memphis had kept Jen either smiling or on the verge of tears the whole time.

“Hope I’ll get you again when you come back, I’d be happy to drive you again anytime. ”

“I’ll hope for that too.” She accepted her tiny red suitcase as he lifted it out of the trunk of his little Hyundai and with a wave, headed off into the airport to find the security lines.

It was a good thing she was traveling carry-on only and had splurged on TSA Pre-Check a couple of years ago.

She’d be able to get to her gate in a flash.

Jen had checked in on her phone last night as soon as the notification had come up, ready to get on her way to Minneapolis. But now as she walked towards security, she found her feet dragging. And she checked her phone over and over to see if there was anything from Ashley.

It didn’t surprise her that there wasn’t.

She had, to her shame, been ghosting the woman.

She knew it wasn’t like her and that it was probably hurting Ashley’s feelings.

No, she corrected herself with guilt. Not probably.

Definitely . She’d been avoiding Ashley at the hospital, too.

And sometimes when their eyes met, just before Jen ducked her head and scurried off, she had seen a flash of pain in those hopeful brown eyes.

The thing was, after the first couple of days of Jen gently rebuffing Ashley’s efforts to connect, there had been only radio silence and those hurt glances.

It was as if Ashley had simply… given up.

There had been no urgent cornerings in a deserted hospital corridor, no furtive encounters at her apartment door, not even a single late night phone call.

Surely, if Ashley wanted to try and fix things, she would have done something , wouldn’t she?

But Jen had heard nothing, she had left the contact ball in Ashley’s court and there it sat, abandoned.

If Ashley did want to repair their relationship, Jen would have liked a public acknowledgment at the hospital.

Not a big announcement, just… it might have been enough, she thought, if Ashley had approached her and asked her to talk, while some of their colleagues were around.

But nothing of the sort had happened. Only passing, beseeching glances. Jen could only give so much from her end. Ashley would have had to have tried , and she just hadn’t. That hurt, so as guilty as she felt about the ghosting and avoidance, it did feel a little… deserved.

That made her feel mean. And that was why she really did have to put herself first, and in a hurry. She didn’t like the way this was all making her feel and act. Something had to change.

Security went smoothly—an absolute miracle at LAX on Christmas Day, even with Pre-Check—and she checked her phone to find her gate.

“Of course it’s at the other end of the terminal,” she groaned.

And the airport was packed, throngs of people swarming around her in a tidal wave of humanity.

Gritting her teeth, Jen put her head down and trudged forth, speeding up a little when she realized her gate was going to close in twenty minutes.

As she approached what felt like the farthest reaches of Outer Mongolia, Jen looked up and saw a crowd at her gate, all lined up and filing into the jetway.

She had undoubtedly missed her business class boarding window, it was going to be an aggravation now to wait, and then to push past whoever was in the aisle seat next to her, who had not cut their boarding so irresponsibly close.

She sighed and began to make her way towards the gate. But as she got close to the end of the line of economy passengers, there was a commotion behind her.

“Jen!”

Slowly, unable to believe her ears, Jen turned around. Her mouth immediately fell open.

Ashley, in leggings, sneakers, and a long sweatshirt.

Sure, they were probably Lululemon or hell, even Saint Laurent or Chanel or someone much too fancy to be making yoga pants, but Ashley.

In casualwear . Jogging towards her with a roller suitcase in tow and a coat over her arm. With her hair in a ponytail .

Jen had to process all of this before she could even get to, what the hell was Ashley doing here at the airport?

Ashley skidded—Ashley? Skidding ??—to a stop before her, breath coming in gasps as she bent double. “I’ve… been… all over …”

“Oh, my God.” Jen knelt down to press a hand to Ashley’s forehead, all hurt and bewilderment burned away by the shock of everything that was happening. “What the hell are you doing? What is this? How did you even find me?”

It took a moment for Ashley to finally catch her breath. “I got lucky. Knew you wouldn’t be on an early morning flight.” She kept taking long, slow breaths. “Been here two hours. Checking every gate with a flight to Minneapolis.”

“How did you even?—”

“Accidentally eavesdropped on you talking to Maria.”

“I knew it.” Jen stood up, pulling Ashley up after her, and snapped her fingers in triumph. “I knew someone was listening.”

“Can’t believe… you were almost late.” Ashley clasped her hands over her forehead and exhaled. Then she locked eyes with Jen. “Don’t go. Please.”

It was all too much. Jen grabbed her suitcase handle in one hand and Ashley’s elbow with the other. She marched over to a bank of chairs at her gate and sat Ashley down, then took the seat across from her, leaning across to take Ashley’s hands in hers. “Explain. Now. Quickly .”

“Jen, I’m so sorry,” Ashley said immediately. “Before anything else, you have to know that I am so sorry for being so shitty to you. I am…” She swallowed hard. “I know I’m kind of an emotionally stunted headcase.”

“Well, I don’t know if I’d say that exactly like that,” Jen said, but shut up when Ashley waved an impatient hand.

“I would, so I am. But the point is that I should have figured out how to handle things in a better way, a little quicker. I got caught up in how incredible everything was on my side, in how much someone was giving me for the first time in my life… and I gave nothing back.” She looked down and shook her head. “I’m sorry for that.”

“Okay.” Jen sat still and thought for a moment. “Apology accepted. Now what are you going to do?”

“Um…”

“Because I love the apology; it’s great you’re apologizing.

But I need to know you understand all of what you’re apologizing for, and I really, really need to know what you plan to do about it.

” She let go of Ashley’s hands and sat back, legs crossed, arms crossed over her chest. Her entire nature screamed out to give the woman a hint, but she stifled it.

If this was going to go anywhere , she couldn’t help Ashley at all.

Ashley breathed in deeply, closed her eyes, and let it out slowly.

When she opened her eyes again, they were warm, loving, and the smile that spread across her face gave Jen a leap of hope.

“I’m going to love you,” Ashley said, boldly and without hesitation, her eyes never wavering.

“And I’m telling you right now that I sound brave, but I am scared shitless about saying this. ”

“Being scared is good,” Jen replied, working to keep her voice steady. “Being brave in spite of being scared is great.”

Ashley nodded and looked down at her hands.

“If you stay here—and I want you to, so much. I didn’t know what a great gift I’d gotten from the universe in you until you walked away—Jen, if you stay here, I want to give things a real chance.

Wide open, known, seen, no subterfuge. I want to live, finally, and I want you to be with me while I do it. ”

Jen uncrossed her arms and her legs and leaned forward again, putting a hand under Ashley’s chin so their eyes met once more. “You’re too hard to resist, and I hate and love that all at the same time. I accept. Let’s do it.”

Joy flared in Ashley’s eyes, a wildfire of happiness, and she jumped to her feet, hauling Jen up after her.

She leaned down to cup Jen’s face in both hands and planted a kiss on her that nearly stole all of her breath away.

Waves of overwhelming happiness, relief, completion , they all washed over and through Jen like a warm golden light.

When they finally parted, Jen was overjoyed to see how unafraid Ashley was. How soft, happy, and frankly wholly human she seemed. It must have been the first time in her life she ever felt like this. Jen felt honored to have been any part of such a glorious becoming.

Overhead, there was a crackle, and a loud, impatient voice. “Will Delta passenger Jennifer Colton please report to the gate for their flight?”

“Oh.” Jen’s hands flew to her mouth. “Oh, no.”

“Don’t go.” Ashley reached out and gently pulled her hands back down. “Don’t.”

“But…” Jen looked over her shoulder, then back at Ashley, then her gaze fell on the suitcase next to Ashley. “Wait, were you going to come with me?”

“Not to Minnesota.” Ashley pulled out her phone and held it up to show a pair of boarding passes, one with each of their names on it. “Come with me. We’ll have Christmas in New York. Together. A fresh beginning, then we come home and start building our real life.”

“Together,” Jen breathed. “Yes, oh, Lord have mercy, yes .”

A joyous little whoop burst out of Ashley’s mouth, and before Jen knew what was happening, she found herself snatched up and spun around in a bone-cracking embrace.

“Thank you, thank you,” Ashley whispered into her ear in a voice positively alight with joy.

“Oh, Merry Christmas, Jen. I have a lot of making up to do.”

Jen rested her head in the smooth curve of Ashley’s neck and felt like she was home. “Merry Christmas, sweetheart.”