Page 23 of Healing Her (Pulse Medical #1)
“ H ow are you feeling?” Jen pulled up a chair at Maria’s bedside.
Maria pulled her earbuds out and glared. “And just where the hell have you been?”
“Merry Christmas to you, too. I come bearing gifts. And chocolate.” Jen raised an eyebrow and held up a Christmas stocking stuffed full to the brim. Maria shook her head and crossed her arms.
“Don’t give me that festive elf shit, hermosa . You disappeared without a word right after you help give me a new damn heart, what was that about?” Her glare somehow got steelier. “Explain, or you can take your damn chocolate and never come back.”
“God, I’ve never known you to refuse chocolate.” Jen wanted to keep things light, but when Maria’s eyes narrowed further and her finger began to hover over the call button, she relented. “Maria, okay, don’t get mad?—”
“I am already mad,” Maria asserted, crossing her arms more tightly.
“Fair,” Jen admitted. She laid the stocking in Maria’s lap and took a deep breath. “I’ve been in Minnesota talking to the Mayo Clinic.”
Maria had loosened up and been about to pick up the stocking, but her hands froze mid-air. “This better not be going where I think it’s going.”
“There were some interviews… there’s been a provisional offer.” Jen cringed back slightly as Maria’s eyes grew dark. “I haven’t decided, exactly.”
“What the fuck, Jen!” Maria exploded and looked as if she was going to go through the roof. But just then, a nurse chose to come in and bustle around doing her checks on Maria’s incision, medication, and pain levels. Jen sat, hands folded in her lap, and avoided Maria’s steady death glare.
Eventually, the nurse left, and Jen slid her gaze to meet Maria’s. It was as piercing as it had been before the nurse showed up. “Okay,” Maria said, her voice flinty. “Explain. Quickly. ”
Deep breath in . “Again, I want to start by saying I haven’t made any decision yet.”
“Quicker,” Maria snapped.
“I… feel I need to separate myself from this hospital entirely,” Jen said, trying to figure out how to speak quickly but still make sense. “I’ve fumbled things up so badly in my time here. New job, new life, I shouldn’t have gotten involved with a colleague on top of all of that.”
“If it’s such a problem, just get uninvolved,” Maria said, waspishly.
“I mean, I guess I’m going to,” Jen admitted, trying to ignore how saying the words aloud made her heart contract painfully. “I just… can’t stay with someone who gives me emotional whiplash. And who doesn’t hear me when I try to talk to her about it.”
“You can break up with someone and not leave your job.” Maria’s eyes were softening, and her hand crept up to cover her new heart. “Please, hermosa . We’re finally living in the same city, don’t leave as soon as you’ve arrived.”
Jen shook her head. “It’s impossible. I can’t just move to a different department here.”
“So another hospital, LA is a big city, any of them would be lucky to have you.” Now Maria’s eyes were beseeching. “Cedars-Sinai! They were my second choice, surely they’d love to have you.”
“They have an excellent transplant director there in Marcie Philpott,” Jen replied, gently. “She’s doing amazing work for them. All of the hospitals in this city have fantastic transplant programs going on. I was actually really fortunate to get in here.”
Maria’s face fell. “Okay, can you at least stay in California? So you’re only a quick plane ride away? San Diego’s not so far.”
“I’ve applied to a few more, and yes, some in California, but I can’t exactly just turn the Mayo Clinic down flat.” She reached over and took Maria’s hand. “I’m going to go visit them at least one more time.”
Maria sighed. “I hate this. You were only seeing her for a few weeks! How can it be so bad so fast?”
“I guess… Maria, I just deserve better than being treated like a dirty mistress. Maybe the love Nina and I had spoiled me. Or honestly, maybe it educated me. If I’m not being heard by my partner three weeks in, at my age, do I really have the time to wait for another grown woman to figure out how to regulate her emotions and handle her work-life balance?
” But saying it like that made her wince. “That was harsh.”
“You were saying how you felt. It must have been really weighing on you.”
“To say the least,” Jen admitted. “Oh, but it really stinks! I like her so much…” She sighed and began to pick at her cuticles.
“But I mean, that’s part of the problem.
I definitely felt it getting serious fast. And if I break it off with her but stay here, I’ll be so tempted to fall back into it and keep getting my feelings hurt because I can’t stay away at this point. ”
Maria’s eyes opened wide. “That serious in such a short amount of time?”
“Apparently.”
They sat in companionable silence for a bit. Maria plucked a Lindt truffle out of her stocking and nibbled at it. “This does feel a bit like you’re running away, querida .”
“Well, that would be because I am .” Standing up, Jen began to pace the room. “I am well aware.”
“I’ve never known you to back down from a challenge,” Maria went on, and when Jen whirled to glare at her, her face was smooth and bland, as innocent as a baby bunny as she popped the rest of her truffle into her mouth.
“I am protecting my peace,” Jen gritted out between clenched teeth.
“Coward,” Maria shot back, succinctly. “Nina would hate to see it.”
“I like to think that Nina would hate to see me in emotional distress, Maria.” She inhaled deeply and pulled herself to stand up straight. “I’ve got to go clear out my office. Even if I don’t accept Mayo’s offer, I’m leaving here, I might as well make it easy on myself.”
“Jen…”
“I’m flying out day after tomorrow for the last round of introductions.
Don’t worry. I’ll visit you when I come back and I’ll keep you updated.
” She summoned a weak smile for her friend and headed for the door of the room.
As she approached, she heard the clatter of heeled shoes, and realized that the nurse had left the door slightly ajar.
Someone had been listening. Ashley?
Cautiously, she opened the door and peered up and down the hallway. She could hear footsteps disappearing down a corridor towards the elevators. There was no way she could run fast enough to see who it might have been before they got on the elevator.
Well. Ashley was going to have to find out about this eventually anyway. Though it didn’t exactly leave Jen with a good feeling that it might have been like this.