Page 15 of Headstrong Cowboy (Montana’s Rodeo Cowboys #2)

B eing nervous wasn’t Ryder’s go-to emotion.

When he’d been competing, he’d had an adrenaline burst before the gates opened and the bull leaped out.

What he was feeling now was completely different.

It wasn’t as if this was the first time he and Chrissy were going to be alone together.

They’d been alone plenty of times. And it wasn’t the first time they’d had dinner as well. They’d already done that.

Yet, tonight felt different and maybe that’s because the parameters of their relationship had changed. He knew that they were going to be intimate, but he also knew that aspect of their relationship was going to be directed by Chrissy.

Her declaration that she’d married her high school sweetheart had given him a moment of mistrust, but he disregarded it quickly.

If Chrissy was still married, there was no way she’d be with him.

Kiss him. Or say she wanted more. She wasn’t that type of person.

Not to mention he was sure Sunny would’ve said something.

Or even Riley. Whatever had happened to her marriage, her husband wasn’t in the picture.

Giving himself one last look in the mirror, he smoothed down his hair, feeling a little naked and exposed that he wasn’t wearing his hat.

Tonight, he’d decided he’d leave it in his room.

It wasn’t as though hats were discouraged from being worn at the restaurant in the Graff.

Far from it, as a lot of men wore their hats.

Ryder just didn’t want to do that tonight.

From the first second he’d put on the beat-up cowboy hat he’d been given at the foster ranch, he’d felt like he belonged to something.

He wasn’t a troublemaker... he was a junior cowhand.

He had a level of importance. And as he’d gone up in the ranks, both at the ranch and in the rodeo circuit, his hats had got more expensive.

As if they were a status symbol, when really they were just hats.

Not wearing it meant shedding a part of his past as that lost youth with no family. The kid who was too hard to deal with. He wasn’t that kid anymore, and he’d found that he wanted to show who he was to Chrissy.

Was that why he was more nervous about this date?

“It’s just drinks and dinner, something you’ve done a lot of times before tonight,” he muttered to his reflection.

The pep talk didn’t do much in terms of settling his nerves, but he’d spoken the truth.

After their dinner at the diner, tonight was going to be just as wonderful.

And she might not even notice he didn’t have his hat on.

You planning on telling her about your interest in her family’s land? And why it’s so important to you? How you could be destroying her family legacy, the way it was taken from your family?

Ryder was getting sick of that little voice in his head, but he couldn’t deny that he needed to tell her. Explain his connection to the land and why it was important that he have it. Except he wanted tonight to be about them and getting to know each other a bit better.

After watching her do more runs again that afternoon, he wanted to ask her about why she hadn’t pursued a career in barrel racing. Of course, growing up, people competed in the rodeo for fun, but someone with the talent that Chrissy had didn’t do it for fun. Like him, they did it as a career.

Like always, any thoughts about rodeos caused the hollow feeling in his stomach to return.

As he’d arrived back at the hotel this afternoon, he’d seen more evidence the town was gearing up for the first event that would be happening in just over a week.

More and more storefronts had decorations and displays in their windows.

He’d stopped in at Sage’s chocolate shop to get something for Chrissy, but the moment he’d seen the crowd and all the cowboy boot chocolates, he’d walked out.

Such an irrational reaction to confectionary, but it had all been too much for him.

The sensible thing to do would be to leave town for the next week and a half and return when the rodeo was finished. Yet, he couldn’t make himself pack his bags and follow through on it. The pull of Chrissy was too strong to even contemplate leaving and not seeing her for so long.

What was going on with him?

Ryder shook his head and packed up his erratic thoughts into a box where he could deal with them later—much later. What he needed to do now was head downstairs and meet Chrissy. It wouldn’t be a good look if he was late.

Checking that he had everything he needed, he flicked the light off as he exited his room and made his way downstairs.

Like always, the foyer was buzzing with people chatting and laughing.

This time he didn’t see a former friend like he had their first night.

And like the first night, his breath caught in his throat when he spied the woman who was taking up more and more of his thoughts, standing in the exact same place as she had been the night of their first dinner date.

He walked up to her, mesmerized by the sapphire blue of her dress. Her hair was curled around her face and her lips were shiny, and he wanted to taste them badly, but he wouldn’t. Not yet, anyway. Later. “We have to stop meeting like this,” he said as he kissed her cheek in greeting.

“We do.” She leaned back and looked him over. “You look dashing tonight. I like the ‘no hat’ look. Makes you look even more handsome.”

“Dashing and handsome, huh?” He glanced down at his pressed black trousers and black button-down shirt.

He wore one of the commemorative bolos from a rodeo’s hundredth celebration.

She’d noticed he didn’t have his hat on and liked it.

“I was going for dangerous.” He waggled his eyebrows and Chrissy giggled at him.

“I suppose dashing, handsome, and dangerous work. Tell me something...” She leaned in so that her lips brushed his ear. “Are you going to kidnap me and tie me to the train tracks?”

Ryder burst out laughing, drawing the attention of a couple of the people standing near them. “I don’t know about the railroad tracks, but kidnapping you and having you all to myself wouldn’t be a bad thing.”

Had he pushed too far again?

No, she wasn’t pulling away or looking horrified. In fact, she looked like the idea appealed to her.

“I could get on board with that,” she said quietly.

Was that a hint of wistfulness in her voice?

He had to have imagined it. Or was it wishful thinking on his part?

He definitely had the financial means to whisk her away to any place she wanted to go.

Maybe he’d ask her over dinner if there was a particular place she wanted to visit most in the world.

“I’ll keep that in mind. Shall we go to the bar and have a drink?

I got us a reservation for dinner, but it’s not until seven thirty. ”

“Sounds great. Lead the way.” She held out her hand and he took it, loving the feel of her lightly callused hand in his.

They found a free table and sat. He couldn’t take his eyes off Chrissy. Whatever she wore, whether it was jeans and a T-shirt or a dress, like she had on tonight, she was beautiful. “You take my breath away.” The words burst out of him and he didn’t want to snatch them back.

She dropped her head a fraction, and her wavy caramel brown fell across her face like a curtain. “I don’t know what to say to that.”

“You don’t need to say anything. Just take it for what it is—a compliment.”

Did he sound a little condescending? He didn’t think so, but sometimes what a person thought didn’t sound so good when they said it out loud.

“It’s been a long time since someone complimented me.”

Knowing that she’d been married had more questions forming in his mind about it. Had her husband turned into an asshole? Or was he being unfair to the man? Perhaps she’d been divorced for years and the guys she’d dated hadn’t been big on giving compliments.

Ryder didn’t ask any of those questions, but he would. He wanted to get to know everything about her. “What would you like to drink?” he asked instead, smiling up at the server who walked over to the table.

“I’ll have a chardonnay, thanks,” Chrissy said.

“I’ll have a scotch on the rocks, top shelf please.”

The server nodded and walked away. The place was busy, but not as noisy as if they’d gone to Grey’s.

“Was your sister home?” he asked Chrissy.

“She was. But I was walking past one of the stores on Main Street and saw this dress. Walked in, tried it on, and here we are. Tilly did let me shower at her place, though,” she finished with an impish grin.

“What is the age difference between you all?”

“My parents had us close together. There’s nineteen months between me and Sunny and eighteen months between Sunny and Tilly.”

“Oh, the teenage years must have been fun in your household,” Ryder commented after the server placed their drinks on the table.

Chrissy laughed and held up her glass. Ryder touched the rim of hers with his glass.

“There were times when three bedroom doors slammed simultaneously. But if someone did something to one of us, that person felt the wrath of the Bloom sisters. We had each other’s backs.

There was no way I was going to let anyone hurt Sunny and Tilly.

And they would do the same for me or each other. ”

“I envy you having that. Knowing that no matter what was happening or where, when you needed it the most, you had someone you could always count on.” There was no way to keep the longing and sadness out of his voice, and Ryder didn’t try to hide it.

He startled when Chrissy’s hand landed on his. “You didn’t have any brothers or sisters?”

He’d wanted their evening to be light and fun, but it wasn’t going to be the case.

In the back of his mind, he’d known that tonight would be heavier than their first date.

He had questions for her about her past, which would lead to questions about his own.

He’d managed to get through their horse ride without having to talk about his land in Texas, and how it had changed his life in a way that he hadn’t expected, and how it had led him to where he was now—in Marietta. “I grew up in foster care.”

Chrissy nodded, not giving him the hum of sympathy he’d heard many times when he mentioned it to the women he was dating. In the end, he never talked about his family with his dates and, if anyone asked, he smoothly changed the subject.

“I want to say, ‘I’m sorry,’ but I don’t think that’s what you need, or want, to hear.”

He quirked his lips. “You’d be right. Thank you for not saying it.”

“You’re welcome and, if you want to tell me more, I’m here to listen. But if you don’t, I understand as well.”

The temptation to spill all that he’d been through as a child to Chrissy was strong, but he controlled it.

She didn’t need to know all the bad stuff that happened to him, or things he did himself to sabotage his life.

The past was over and it couldn’t be changed, no matter how much he may want to alter some aspects of it.

All the things he’d been through had turned him into the man he was today.

“Thank you for the offer. Maybe another time.”

Chrissy sipped her wine and then smiled over the top of her glass. “There’s going to be another time, is there?”

This woman was flirting with him, and he loved every second of it. “There could be.” He winked to let her know he was teasing. He most definitely wanted there to be another time.