Page 90 of Havoc

29

Aimee

My stomach turns asI take in the gray skin. The splintered bone at the wrist.

The wedding band he never took off.

The scar on his index finger from the time it slipped when he was helping me open a can of green beans.

The lines on his knuckles are deeper than I remember, and they blur with the tears filling my eyes.

In the other room, Christmas music continues to play too cheerfully considering what is sitting in front of me. I try to step back, and my body runs into Levi’s firm chest. He’s the only reason I’m still standing when my knees are weak, and my head is swimming.

“I need air.” This time, when I pull away, Levi lets me go.

I shove between him and Venom and dip out of the room.

Through the static in my ears, I vaguely hear someone say they’ll contact Steel, but I’m gone by the time anyone responds.

Footsteps follow me, and I know it’s Levi without having to look back. His steady presence is all that holds my feet on the earth as the world flips upside down.

I spent almost a year with Titan. I know what he’s capable of. The scar on my stomach is the ever-present reminder of how far he’ll go to make a statement. I’ve always known there’s no mercy in hell.

But to see the pound of flesh taken from someone elsebecause of me…

I shove through the back slider and fall to my knees in the dirt. A rock slices into my hand as I plant my palms on the ground, and my stomach heaves.

Everyone in the clubhouse might be watching, but I don’t care.

The world is blurry, and my stomach won’t stop turning.

I throw up again.

And again.

Until I have nothing left.

Not just in my stomach, but in my soul. My heart.

I suppose that was the point. Titan’s ultimate goal was to break me, and he did a wonderful job. He didn’t just rip my life away; he stripped me of hope. Of confidence. He ripped me away from myself.

And now my father is suffering because of that obsession. Because I’m not there for Titan to play out this game. My father is hurting because of me.

Dirt digs under my fingernails as I curl my fingers, scraping them on the earth. It’s not enough for me to hold on as my mind slips into an abyss, so I seal my eyes shut and try to forget.

I fight, scratch, claw, beg, but I’ll never be free of him.

Titan made sure of it.

Levi kneels beside me in the dirt, resting a hand on my back. He silently rubs up and down, not speaking. Just letting me know he’s here.

My gravity. My center.

I don’t deserve Levi after everything that’s happened. He’s too understanding, and he hasn’t balked at a single confession. He should hate me for who I am now. Or, at the very least, for being the reason his club’s war with the Iron Sinners has escalated. He shouldn’t be here, making me feel better when I don’t deserve it.

Levi’s hand pauses at my lower back as I curl forward and vomit again. Only a splash of stomach acid comes out this time.

I’m empty as I rock back on my heels and sit in the dirt with my knees curled to my chest. I tip my forehead to my knees and take a long, deep breath as Levi continues to rub my back.