Page 39

Willow

The blankets shifted over me as I rolled over in bed, bringing Angus with me. I couldn’t recall a time I’d ever wallowed in self pity like this, but I’d also never felt as low.

Whenever Cain knocked my confidence, I’d live with the tiniest slither of hope that my future might be different. He’d control me the next day and all the days after that, but I always had that slither of hope, I could always dream of an alternative future.

But now, there was no hope. I may have been removed from his physical grasp, but now he was allowed to roam the streets and I’d never be safe or allowed to move on.

I’d always be looking over my shoulder or around every corner, switching lights on to check the shadows.

I’d never be able to fully trust another partner, no matter how hard they tried to prove their ability to love me without harming me.

Cain took my past, present, and my future from me, and the only thing he had to deal with was solicitor fees.

Well, that wasn’t entirely true. The household bills were now all on him.

The thought of his financial struggles gave me temporary relief, I could smile at that.

Karma would get him somehow, however small.

Fuck you very much, British justice system.

I clenched Angus’ head a little tighter, brushing his tufty fuzzy hair over my dry lips and sighing heavily. With every deep breath came a brief reprieve of the deep, aching pain. But all too soon, it returned, and the cycle of sadness continued.

Suddenly, the duvet was tugged off me and I was greeted with the bright overhead light.

“What the fuck?!” I croaked out, pulling my body in on itself and covering my eyes with part of Angus.

“Get up,” a familiar voice instructed, and I pulled Angus away, peeling my eyes open and adjusting them to the bright light.

“Elle?” I queried, tugging the duvet back.

“Yep, it’s me. Your knight in shining armour. Up you get.”

She tugged the duvet back and out of reac h

“Elle, please not now,” I groaned. “We’ll hang another time.” I shoved my face into the pillow beside me, it smelled of Jack, I enjoyed that far too much.

“We’re not hanging , dickhead. You’re getting up and into the bath running for you upstairs. And if you refuse, so help me God, I’ll carry you upstairs, strip you naked and dump you in the water myself.”

I peered at her. She clutched the duvet between her crossed arms, her hair static from the bedding battle. Her expression was stern. I opened my mouth to argue, until she raised her dark, pierced brow, and pouted – not an Elle I wanted to battle with.

Sighing heavily, I sat up and feebly moved round the bed, catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I gasped at the sight; hair tangled and in two matted ropes which used to be plaits, my T-shirt crumpled and one of the legs to my leggings half way up my calf.

“If you think the sight of you is bad, you should smell you. You fucking stink.” I glared at Elle in horror. “Fuck knows how Jack’s managed to sleep in the same room as you, poor bastard.”

Panic struck through me.

“You don’t think he’s notic—”

“Noticed? Without a doubt. You’re putrid, but he’s too kind, dreamy and British to say anything about it. So, move your arse up those stairs so I can fumigate this room, then we’ll go from there.” Elle started to strip the sheets from the bed.

“Why? What’s happening?”

She turned, and I could have sworn she pounced at me.

“Never mind ‘what’s happening?’ Get out!”

Before she could scare me anymore, I rushed upstairs to the huge free-standing bathtub. Candles lined the shelves and sink unit, and a large, white fluffy towel hung over the towel rail.

I stripped out of my six - or was it five? -day-old clothes. Pulling the T-shirt over my head I took the risk of sniffing it. Elle’s description of my stench wasn’t inaccurate. Jack had slept by me in this state all week, how embarrassing.

I sunk into the steaming water, soothing the aching limbs caused by endless days shifting only from one side of the bed, to the other.

Twenty minutes later, I had my hair washed despite my bandage and was wrapped in a fluffy towel. I’d become pretty skilled at working around my bandaged finger. It would take a while to adapt to having my fingers back soon.

Sheepishly, I moved downstairs to my bedroom, wrapped in the warm fluffy towel, damp hair wrapped in a bun on top of my head.

I stepped into my bedroom to find the curtains drawn, a fresh set of bedding on the bed, an outfit laid out on top, and Elle vacuuming the carpet.

She switched the vacuum off when she caught sight of me.

“Get dressed, we’re going out,” she snapped, before returning to the door.

Hesitant to irritate Elle more than I already had, I did as I was told.

She’d pulled out light-wash blue denim jeans, an olive green knitted jumper, and black Converses.

It was an outfit that felt like me, and Elle knowing that too, brought warmth to my insides.

I quickly blow-dried my hair and waited for Elle to tell me what to do next.

She wasn’t in control, but she’d at least had fresh air in the past week, so her decision-making skills were more trustworthy.

She looked me up and down and smiled like a proud mother.

“Grab your coat and come downstairs.” I pulled my coat on and followed her.

Downstairs, we moved into the living room, I stopped in the doorway, until Elle pushed me in further. Jack was perched on the edge of the sofa, the two dogs sitting either side of him with proud smiles etched into their adorable faces.

He stood and, as though he wasn’t sure what to do with himself, awkwardly put his hands in, and then out of his pockets.

Was Jack Lambert nervous?

“Willo—”

“Jack —”

We spoke simultaneously, then paused, before Jack spoke.

“You look… great. How do you feel?” He looked past me at Elle. “Can I ask her that?”

“Yes, you can ask me that,” I chuckled. “I’m feeling a bit better, thank you. Needed someone snarky to get me out of my funk.”

“I’d be offended if it wasn’t true,” Elle snorted from behind me. I ignored her and continued.

“I’m sorry Jack. I’m sorry I just retreated into myself, and didn’t communicate at all.” I avoided eye contact with Jack, looking around the room. “And for stinking the room out, I’m really, really sorry for that and would be grateful if everyone in this house could pretend that never happened.”

“Forgotten.” Jack smiled, a soft, comforting smile.

“Absolutely not,” Elle replied. We both looked over my shoulder to glare at her.

“I’ll avoid reminding you the reason why you festered, but I won’t be hesitant to remind you just how bad you stank ” —an unexpected growl crept up my throat, until she interrupted— “ or how far you’ve come. ” She winked at me and left the room.

“She isn’t wrong.” I turned back to him as he spoke. “If we forget you were —” He struggled to find the correct phrasing and I bit my lip to avoid laughing.

“Fragrant?” I suggested .

“Yep. Fragrant. If we forget that and remember how much progress you’ve made since you got here, you’re doing brilliantly.”

He smiled down at me, and I was suddenly acutely aware of the proximity of our bodies.

It looked like Jack realised the same thing at the same time.

He pulled me in by the shoulders and into his arms. Surprised, it took a moment for my body to react, but eventually my arms wrapped around his middle, and we sighed in sync.

Today was the day for surprises apparently, because I was dumbstruck when he pressed a delicate kiss to my forehead. I pulled back from his chest, until our faces were barely an inch apart.

He watched me with hooded, cautious eyes, as if he was longing to do something. In sync, we turned our focus to the other’s lips.

And there it was again. That invisible string, tugging one towards the other. We were so close, our lips so close I could feel and taste his minty breath. I parted my lips, ready for whatever this string had in store.

A loud cough came from behind us, and we jolted apart.

Elle was leaning against the door frame with a shit-eating grin. “Come on, we’re getting our hair done. This one’s on him." She winked, nodding at beyond me.

I grinned, glancing back at Jack and he offered a bashful smile, his hand moved to my elbow with a soft squeeze.

“Enjoy, ladies.”

Stepping out the door, into the early February sun, Elle dragged me to her racing green Mini Cooper – her prized possession. Plying the door open, I found Silas enveloped in the backseat with a sheepish smile.

“I hope you don’t mind me joining? I have hair too and… I missed you.” He looked down at his tattooed knuckles.

I flung myself over the centre console and into his lap. “Missed you too, Si.”

“You look good,” He squeezed me tightly.

“You should have smelled her. If you had, you wouldn’t say tha—”

“Shut up !” I shouted, my face stuffed into Silas’ muscular, cosy chest.

Together, we sped off to Elle’s favourite salon and settled into side-by-side chairs groaning at the scalp massages. It wasn’t until we were sat with hot drinks ready for our haircuts that Elle finally spoke.

“Did I interrupt something earlier?”

“Nope.” Yes , I snapped, desperate to shut her up, but this was Elle, and it wasn’t that easy.

“Hmm,” she sing-songed. “Didn’t look like that from where I was standing.”

I sighed and glared at her in the mirror .

“Well, you were standing in the wrong place,” I mumbled. She glared at me, forcing me to continue. “You’re going to anyway, so tell me. What did it look like?”

“Looked to me like you have eyes for zaddy Jack, and he has eyes for you.” She giggled to herself, and I rolled my eyes. “Roll your eyes all you like, you’re not denying it and you’re blind if you can’t see it.”

That irritated me, and Silas knew it. He shot his twin a warning glare.

“Okay, let’s say I do see it,” I snapped.

“What could he possibly see in the girl who stunk out the bedroom for a week because she was wallowing in self pity, after her abusive ex-boyfriend called her from an unknown number despite having a protection order against him. How could he ever want anything to do with someone as grossly pathetic as me ?”

The whole salon went quiet, and I realised I’d raised my voice. I sunk back in my chair, allowing the hairdresser to continue trimming my ends, but the hum returned.

“Not to mention he’s my boss, Elle. I’m sure that goes against like, every HR rule.”

“So, we’ll build that self confidence back up in due course, because how could he not want you? But you still didn’t deny that you feel something for him .”

She grinned at me from the corner of my eye while I glared at my reflection.

The mottled skin had faded but my confidence was wounded, and it was near impossible to see the girl behind the trauma.

How could anyone find this attractive, never mind Jack?

He was so special and so deserving of something special.

That wasn’t me, especially not right now. Could it ever be?

“Why are you doing this?” I asked, eyes closed.

“What she’s trying to say,” Silas interrupted from my left, a big gentle hand covering mine that gripped the arm of the chair, “is that you deserve to feel good. You’ve been trampled on for so long, we want to look after you, look out for you.

Plus, Jack has something up his sleeve to bring a spark back into you, because we’ve all missed your light. ”

I opened my eyes, gaping at him.

“What kind of surprise?”

“I swear to God, just accept the kind gesture, Willow,” Elle groaned.

They were right, today, and whatever Jack had in store was just what I needed.