Page 119 of Hard Rock Tease

Kell almost did a double take and calmed down a bit. “You probably want to give him a few minutes.”

“Is he okay?” He seemed fine on stage.

“Yeah, of course.” Kell gave me a thoughtful look. “Jayce likes time to himself to wind down after a concert.” He shrugged and moved on before I could ask any other questions.

I frowned, frustrated. My day’s work wasn’t complete without Jayce. I needed to catch him while he was still hyped up. I grabbed the arm of one of the backstage assistants.

“Hey, did you see where Jayce went?”

She shrugged and pointed. I followed her finger to an emergency exit door. I paused for a second, not wanting to invade his privacy, but I needed to do my job. He’d just come off the stage, playing to a huge crowd. Surely one more person in his face wouldn’t be too bad. I’d get a quote, head back to the tour bus, and leave him in peace. I pushed the door open quietly.

Jayce was sitting on the grey concrete steps of an empty stairwell, head in his hands, back facing me. His shoulders rose with a deep inhalation and slowly dropped as he exhaled.

“Jayce?”

He whirled around, entire body tensing up, expression shocked. His eyes were bloodshot, and his face was dull, skin almost yellowed in undertone.

“What are you doing here?” His voice was low and throaty, as if he wasn’t getting enough air into his lungs.

“I-I’m sorry. I just wanted…” I trailed off, looking at him more closely. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” He turned his back and ignored me. He took a deep breath in, and out came a frail, wheezing sound.

“Hey, if you’re sick, you should let someone know.”

“I’m not sick.” He didn’t turn around.

I hesitated. I understood not wanting to show weakness, but I didn’t want Jayce to think he had to hide himself away if he wasn’t feeling well.

“Want me to get someone?”

“No!” He shouted, eyes wide and scared, surprising me with his intensity. He lowered his head and heaved a sigh. “No, don’t get anyone. I’ll be okay in a minute.”

I didn’t want to leave him like that. I contemplated for a moment, then took the few steps down and sat next to him.

“If something’s wrong, you can tell me.” I echoed the same words he’d said to me.

He tilted his head back and glanced at me quickly before looking away. His fists were clenched, white-knuckled and trembling.

“Non-disclosure agreement, remember? I can’t tell anybody anything, or else they’ll sue me into the poorhouse.” I tried to give him an encouraging smile. I got a hesitant look back in response. “You don’t have to, though. No pressure.”

We sat in silence for a few long moments. I kept on expecting him to get up and leave, but he stayed sitting next to me, the tension in his muscles slowly relaxing with every second.

I bumped my shoulder against his. “You know, the guys might get worried if the two of us disappear together for too long.”

Jayce huffed out a small chuckle and, slowly, the shaking in his hands stopped.

“This stays off the record, right?”

“I promise.”

“Okay. Right.” He rubbed his hands on his pants as if wiping away sweaty palms. I wondered for a moment if he was going to continue. Then he spoke.

“I get panic attacks.”

Chapter Six

He saidthe words in one breath, as if blurting them out before he could take them back. I tried to hide my shock. I didn’t want him to think it was a big deal, or he might regret telling me.