Page 7 of Guys Can’t Write Romance

“No. No dinosaurs. No car chases. No bank robberies. Put it back the way it was.” Her eyes then went to the tilted paintings and books. “And put this stuff back, too. And my spices. Jeez. You’re worse than my first-graders.”

Across the room, Chloe poked her head out of her bedroom door and took a quick look around at the carnage.

“Woah,” she said, stepping into the room and taking a closer look. She turned to Chad. “You messed with the Post-Its? And you’re still living?”

“He won’t be for long if he doesn’t put it back the way it was,” Daisy said.

“What if I can’t remember where they went?” Chad said.

“Then you die.”

“How come the fun always happens when I need to leave?” Chloe said.

“Wait! You’re leaving me?!” Daisy said.

“Yep. Tonight’s my finger-painting class,” Chloe said. “And believe me, no one’s more bummed I need to miss this than me.” She turned to Chad and shot him a grin. “On the slight chance you’re not dead when I get back, I owe you a beer.”

“I should be going too,” said Chad.

Daisy spun to him. “Not a chance. You’re putting everything back the way it was. And then we’re working on our books. I’m not losing this contest because your brain decided to explode.”

“You still want to work on our books?” Chad said.

“Want to? No. Have to? Yes. Those were Mags’ rules.”

“What about all the notes I gave you?” Chad said, pointing to the wall. “It’s all right there.”

“Those aren’t notes. They’re provocations. I need constructive notes. Not dinosaurs squashing my male lead. And you need notes too, unless you’re chickening out on our bet.”

Chad smirked. “Not a chance.”

“Then fix my wall and let’s do this.”

“Now I’m really bummed I have to miss this,” Chloe said, picking up her bag. “Can you guys keep fighting till I get back?”

“No,” Daisy said. “Because Chad’s going to fix this room, then we’re going to work on our books till Ethan gets here.”

“Who’s Ethan?” Chad said.

“The boyfriend,” Chloe said, patting her mouth in a feigned yawn. “AKA, nature’s cure for insomnia. Hope you brought some Red Bull.”

“It’s in my backpack.”

Daisy folded her arms across her chest. “Being mature and responsible does not make Ethan boring.”

“No. Being boring makes Ethan boring,” Chloe said.

“So, what would it take to make him less boring for you?”

“Having a pulse, for starters.”

“Kind of like Daisy’s male leads,” Chad said.

Chloe grinned. “Exactly like Daisy’s male leads.”

Daisy spun to Chad and shot him a glare. “You. Fix my Post-Its. Now!”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Just keep the Red Bull handy, Chaos Boy,” Chloe said to Chad. “You’ll thank me.” As she turned to leave, a knock came at the door.

Daisy froze, hoping she hadn’t actually heard it. Then it came again. “Oh no. Oh no, no, no,” she muttered, glancing at her watch. Her stomach dropped. “He’s early.”

Chloe’s eyes perked. “Oooh. Is that Boring Banker?”

“Yes,” Daisy said. “He’s not supposed to be here till seven.”

“Welp,” Chloe said, dropping her bag and plopping down on the couch. “Guess I’m staying.” She grabbed the bag of chips off the coffee table and patted the couch beside her. “Grab a seat, Chaos Boy,” she said to Chad, her eyes beaming with mischief. “This plot just got fun.”

“Ethan’s Boring Banker?” Chad said, plopping down on the couch.

“Yep,” Chloe said, angling the bag of chips so Chad could reach inside. “Get ready with the Red Bull.”

“Do not encourage him,” Daisy hissed, smoothing her skirt as she hurried to the door.

She opened it, and Ethan stood there, looking pristine as always.

If Chad embodied chaos in his hoodie and baseball cap, Ethan embodied smug sophistication in his perfectly tailored suit and tie.

His polished dress shoes clacked on the tiles as he stepped inside, his faint cologne wafting ahead of him.

He adjusted the cuff of his perfectly ironed button-down shirt, then, almost as an afterthought, leaned down and kissed Daisy briefly on the cheek.

“You’re not ready?” he said.

“I thought you were picking me up at seven,” Daisy replied, brushing her hair back behind her ears. “You’re early.”

“I didn’t want to waste time,” Ethan said briskly. “I thought we could grab drinks before dinner.” His eyes then flickered to Chad. “And who’s this?”

“Oh! Uh,” Daisy stammered, smoothing her skirt as she stepped slightly to the side. “This is Chad. He’s, um…”

“Writing partner,” Chad filled in. He rose from the couch and stepped forward just enough to extend a hand. “Nice to meet you.”

Ethan hesitated for the briefest of moments before taking Chad’s hand in a brief, overly formal shake. “Ethan,” he replied coolly. “I see writing has brought a diverse group together.”

“Sure has,” Chad said, his grin not faltering for a second. “So you’re Daisy’s boyfriend, huh? She probably mentioned you, but I wasn’t paying attention.”

“He never does,” Daisy muttered beneath her breath.

Ethan didn’t return Chad’s grin. Instead, he turned back to Daisy.

“I wasn’t aware this contest was such a group activity,” Ethan said with the faintest hint of disapproval. “But it’s good you’re getting support, I suppose.”

“Oh, yeah, we’re big on support around here,” Chad said. “You see the Post-It mess Daisy made on the wall over there? I was just about to help her fix it when you showed up. Early.”

Daisy shot Chad a glare. Note to self: Chad dies a slow, painful death.

“Post-It mess?” Ethan asked, his brow creasing as he looked past Daisy to the wall; and then around the room at the tilted painting and misplaced books. “It appears the entire room is a mess.”

“Long story,” Daisy muttered. “I’ll tell you over drinks.”

Ethan’s eyes returned to Chad, narrowing just slightly. “And what is it you do, Chad?”

“Oh, lots of things,” Chad replied casually. “Write. Surf. Shoot hoops. Coach P.E. and baseball.”

Ethan blinked, clearly unimpressed. “Oh. P.E.? Hm. Well, I suppose someone needs to teach the children.”

Daisy did a double-take and shot him a look. “I teach children too, you know.”

Ethan returned her look. “That’s not what I meant.”

“That’s exactly what he meant,” Chloe piped in from the couch, kicking her feet up on the coffee table and shoving another chip into her mouth like she was watching a Netflix show. “But hey, Spreadsheet Guy, you do you.”

Ethan shot Chloe a brief, mildly disapproving glance.

“Have you ever played sports, Ethan?” Chad said, giving Ethan’s lanky frame a once-over. This guy probably thought chess was a sport.

“I have. Why do you ask?”

“Just curious. Golf obviously doesn’t count.”

“You don’t consider golf a sport?”

Chad snickered. “Sports are about breaking a sweat. But I can see how that might clash with some people’s cologne.”

“Some of us prefer not to smell like a locker room, I suppose.”

“Or they just know they’ll suck. But hey, every game has a winner and a loser, right?”

“I couldn’t agree more.”

“You guys should do a game of one-on-one basketball,” Chloe chimed in. “My money’s on the sweaty P.E. coach.”

Daisy grimaced. “Don’t you have to be at work, Chloe?”

“And miss the testosterone fireworks?” Chloe said, popping another chip into her mouth. “Not a chance.”

Ethan snorted. “I suppose, to each their own.” He turned to Daisy. “We should be on our way if we’re going to catch drinks before dinner.”

“I’m gonna need several,” Daisy said as she followed him to the door.

Ethan gave Chad one last dismissive glance before opening the door for Daisy.

“Don’t forget. Writing session’s at my place tomorrow night,” Chad called out from the couch. “Bring snacks.”

“His place?” Ethan said to Daisy.

“Long story,” Daisy said as she hurried out the door.

As soon as the door clicked shut, Chloe chuckled and spun to Chad, who just became her new favorite partner in crime. “Okay. That was awesome. Watching you ruffle his feathers was worth all the crap I’m going to hear tomorrow about how you desecrated her Post-It wall of horrors.”

“You’re not an Ethan fan?”

Chloe snorted. “I’d rather eat paint. Speaking of which, I’d better get to class before the kids paint my windows. But you’re a trip to have around, Chad. I hope Daisy doesn’t kill you too soon.”

“Me too.”