Page 58 of Grounded (Convergence #1)

Chuckling against her flesh, Thax obeyed his destra's command and then sat back on his heels to gaze up at her.

As he did, the branches slowly released Liria, lowering her into his waiting arms. He settled her astride his lap, his spent shaft nestling into her wet warmth.

Thax sighed and pulled her into an embrace.

“I love you, Liri, my destra. Please remember that when I behave like a brute.”

“I love you too. Remember that when I'm a vicious bitch.”

“Oh, fuck me,” he muttered. “I'm sorry. I keep saying terrible things to you.” He leaned his cheek against hers. “First, I feel like a mutant, and then a monster. And now, there's this.” He looked up at the tree. “What was that?”

“That was something Medeans can't do. We don't converge the living, not even plants. I don't even have a theory about how you just converged magic and technology in a tree. It's miraculous. You are miraculous. There's no one like you in all of Para.”

“That's another way of saying that I'm alone.”

Liria set her palm on his cheek. “Do you feel alone?”

“Yes.” Thax shuddered. “I'm sorry, destra. I know you're here, but this isn't inside you. It's in me. And that makes me feel alone even as I hold you. You can't understand what I'm going through. I don't even understand it.”

“I don't have to understand it to help you through this. It's a part of you, but you are a part of me. So, just like we promised each other, we're going to do this together.”

“You're so fucking brave, Liri. I need you to keep being brave for me. Can you do that? Are you sure you can face this with me?”

“I told you; there's nothing to be afraid of.”

“Yes, but I know you're lying.”

Liria widened her eyes at him.

“You're lying to ease me, but I sense it, destra. You know the magic has morphed inside me. It's become something new. Neither Medeans nor Aethari will welcome this new thing I've become. You may not fear me, but they will. And they will come for me.”

“For us. They will come for us,” Liria corrected. “But by the time they discover what you are, you will have mastered your ability. And Source will have shown you why you've been given this talent.”

“Why?” Thax stood up, taking her with him.

He steadied Liria as her wobbly legs threatened to topple her.

“The only reason for someone to have this power is to conquer others with it.

This is a weapon, Liri. A battle cry from the Source of Magic.

And the worst part is—I don't know whose side I'd be on.”

“Now you're sounding like your father.”

Thax scowled.

“I'm a vicious bitch, remember?”

“Stop saying that,” he whispered. “I didn't mean it. I don't mean half the things I say lately. The bitterness and anger just sort of bubble up and come out as poisonous words.”

“I know, destru. And maybe I have stretched the truth to comfort you, but I promise you that I'm not trying to comfort you now when I say that the Sources—both of them—have more than war planned for you.

They touched me too, remember? When I was underground, they helped me converge in a way very similar to what you did with that vidco.

I felt its . . . I don't know what I felt.”

“Need,” he whispered.

“Yes. You felt it too?”

“Yes. Liri, I have to tell you something. The night we were attacked—you asked me how I had summoned magic, and I said I hadn't. I'm not so sure that was true.”

“The night . . . but that was before you lost . . .”

“Before I was taken, yes. I had never spoken before, so I honestly wasn't sure if what I experienced was normal.

Now that I've converged, I know what I felt couldn't be what all Aethari speakers feel. It guided me, Liri. Not exactly with words, but there was knowledge passed to me. I knew how to move and where to be. I knew exactly what I needed to do to save you.”

“Thax, just now, as you converged with the tree, your eyes glowed. That doesn't happen with normal convergence, but I saw your father's eyes and skin glow when he spoke. So, maybe it was normal. Maybe you can still speak, destru.”

“No. No, the Source of Magic wouldn't speak through me now?”

“Why not? It just helped you converge. In a way, it spoke to you, just not through you.”

“But only Aethari speak. I am no longer Aethari.”

“That's debatable, but what's certain is that the Source of Magic is still with you. You are still chosen. And isn't Source supposed to guide its speakers? Doesn't it tell them what to say? That's knowledge, isn't it?”

“It speaks through them. It doesn't tell a speaker what to say.”

“But that night when you first spoke, Source wasn't speaking through you.”

Thax frowned. “That's the thing I'm not sure about.”

“The more I think about it, the more I think you're right to suspect it was different. When your father blessed us and spoke, those were obviously not his words. The same happened before I went after you. He spoke to me, and it was the Source coming through him. It told me it would be with me down there.”

“What?” Thax whispered. “You've never told me that.”

“Oh. I guess I kind of forgot about it with everything else that happened.”

“What did it say?”

Liria frowned. “It said it would guide and guard me. That it would go into the dark with me. And then it told me to retrieve my destru.”

“The Source of Magic told you to go after me?”

Liria grinned. “I told you. You're special.”

“And it called me your destru. Liri, it acknowledged our bond.”

“Huh. Yeah, I guess it did.”

“It went with you into the dark,” he whispered. “Great Source, thank you for protecting my destra and helping her save me.”

“Oh, so now Source gets all the credit?”

Thax burst into surprised laughter. “Isn't that what you've been saying all along—that it was two sources that guided and helped you?”

“Yeah, but I still want some credit for doing the manual work.”

He leaned down and kissed her. “I know you saved me. I've thanked you, haven't I? But I'd be happy to show you my gratitude again?” His hand drifted between her robe.

That's when she realized his pants were still hanging open. Grinning, she took his hand from her and put it on his pants. “Close your pants, baby. There are about ten gardeners out here.”

“Ten?” He looked around. “Why so many? We have only two maids.”

“Because the maids mostly dust empty rooms. They have only a few places to really clean. But a garden doesn't collect dust. It just keeps growing.”

He grunted as he fastened his pants. Then he picked her up.

“What are you doing?” She laughed as he carried her inside.

“Ten gardeners,” he growled. “I don't want any of them seeing you in your robe.”

Thax carried her to their suite, Liria snuggling against him the whole way. Only when he had the door shut behind him did he put her down.

Liria pulled him over to sit on the bed. “I think you need to talk to your father.”

“About Source blessing you before going after me?”

“No, you need to ask him what it's like when he speaks. Then you'll know for sure.”

“No.” He stepped back. “I can't let him know that I may still be able to speak. Especially not now that I know Source spoke to you through him. He will expect too much of me.”

“You've always wanted to bring about a change in the Aethari. Now, you can.”

Thax made a derisive snort. “Of course. Now I have the power to make a change. Now that I don't want to.”

“Why not?”

“Liria, I wanted the laws changed so I could marry you. But they don't apply to me anymore.”

“I thought you also wanted to change the law about mandatory service? And not just the laws, but your people in general. You said you were going to change Para.”

“Yes, destra. But now, I am the one who has changed. They are not my people anymore.”

“Yes, they are. You were born an Aethari. No matter what you become, you will always be Aethari.”

“You don't understand. Nor did I back when I wanted to be a leader to my people.

Change only comes at a price, and usually, it's blood.

I don't know how the Medeans will react to my converging or whatever this is, but I do know the Aethari will not accept it. This will be seen as something evil, brought back with me from the underground. They will declare me tainted by the Source of Technology and cursed by the Source of Magic, as evidenced by my lack of wings. They will never accept me as any kind of leader now.”

“Then fuck 'em.”

Thax snorted a laugh.

“No, really. You don't have to do anything with this new power. You can train with it, learn to master it, and use it purely for entertainment if you want. Whatever you do, there's no rush. If you want to ignore it, fine. Whatever you decide, I will support your decision.”

“Ignore it? You'd be all right with my simply ignoring this power? Just pretend it doesn't exist?”

“Why wouldn't I be?”

“I . . . I thought you'd want me to be, I don't know, a hero or something.”

“That's what you wanted, Thax. I'm a trained soldier.

I don't need a hero. I need you to be happy.

Healthy. Alive. My partner in life. I need you here with me.

Not in body alone, but fully present. Be my destru as you promised.

That's what I want from you. Just stay with me, and we'll figure out the rest together. All in good time. Our time.”

“Really?”

“Of course. You should know that I don't care about status or power. Heroics.” She snorted.

“Those things don't matter.” Liria laid her hand on his chest. “This matters.

Hearing your voice. Seeing you in your eyes.

You've been a ghost, Thax. Just like your wings, you've haunted this house.

Let them go, and return to living. That's what I want.”

“I want that too.” Thax laid his hands on her hips.

“I can't deal with figuring out what the sources want from me right now.

It's going to be hard enough to figure myself out without this getting in the way.

I want to forget for a little while. And then maybe, after I've gotten strong again, I can think about how to use this new ability.”

“Or not use it. It's your choice.”

“You don't know what a relief it is to hear you say that.”

“Just promise me one thing.”

“What?”

“Don't retreat into your mind again.”

“I won't.”

“Good, because feeding you while you were catatonic was not sexy. You've ruined all food-related kinks for me.”

Thax stared at her with wide eyes for a few seconds and then burst out laughing.

Liria stared. Thax was so damned handsome when he laughed.

She had forgotten that. And she'd forgotten who he was.

You'd think that with her constantly trying to remind him of his true self that she'd remember.

But in the midst of his anguish, the old Thax felt, well, dead.

Not any longer. There he was, surfacing from the underground at last. His soul just needed some time to catch up with his body.