Page 41 of Gideon (Finding Home #3)

Chapter

Fifteen

The bastion of havoc and bad behavior

Eli

Gideon stiffens all over like he has rigor mortis, and I tighten my grip on his hand.

“You alright?” I ask in a low voice.

To my amazement he doesn’t show any sign of hearing me. Instead, he stands up, and I feel my hand fall away unnoticed and unneeded. I lift my fingers and massage my chest as I watch him stride over to Frankie.

“Show me,” he demands, his voice tight and very, very controlled.

Frankie fumbles with his phone and holds it out to Gideon.

He takes it and looks intently at the picture before sinking suddenly into a chair.

Milo exclaims and hugs Gideon’s shoulders as Niall takes away the phone and stares at it.

He shakes his head. “Wankers,” he says in a low, angry voice, and then, to my amazement, he hands the phone to me.

I take it tentatively, feeling like it might turn around and bite me.

It’s as if it’s a sentient being. I look down and gasp.

It’s Gideon and me, and the first gasp is one of relief because out of every photo someone could have taken of us, the one of us hugging in the coffee shop is probably the least harmful to Gid’s career.

I think of the blowjob in the garden and shudder.

However, when I look again, I realise how very incriminating this photo actually is.

Gideon is holding me close, one hand clutching low on my hip and the other cradling my face.

He’s talking intently and the fondness in his eyes is unmistakable even in this grainy image.

It’s an incredibly intimate pose, something no straight man would entertain, but it’s my face that really gives the game away because I look like I’m drowning in him, all my attention on him and the love I feel visible in my eyes.

I hope that it’s just visible to me. I shudder, and Niall takes the phone away.

“Gideon,” I say in a low voice, willing him to look at me, to smile, to wink, even to say something typically acerbic that will bring a smile to my lips. But he does nothing. Literally nothing. Instead he ignores me, staring ahead into the distance as if he’s far away.

“ Gideon ,” Frankie snaps and my heart feels sick at the way Gideon immediately responds to his agent as if conditioned to do it. Like a dog.

“What?” he says hoarsely.

“Gideon,” I try again, and Frankie shoots me a glare full of intense dislike mingled with pleasure that Gideon is again ignoring me.

“It’ll be alright, Gid,” he says quickly. “I’ll fix it. Yeah?”

“Fix it by lying some more,” Milo says acidly, and Gideon stirs.

“Not now,” he whispers.

Milo hugs him but it must be like hugging a rag doll because Gideon just flops against him, his gaze still far away and turned inward.

“Yes, lying,” Frankie says angrily. “What else do you suggest we do, Milo? Fess up that he’s fucking his bloody nurse?

” Milo opens his mouth, but Frankie shakes his head, his eyes alive with disgust. “No,” he says sharply.

“You’ve had your way, Milo, and look what’s happened.

Gid’s career is over.” Gideon stirs, and Frankie grabs his shoulders.

“We can fix this, though,” he says, talking low.

The man’s charisma even now is unmistakable, his voice taking on a commanding take-no-prisoner turn. I can see how he captivated a lonely young boy. How he’s maintained a hold on him for so many years. I swallow hard.

“Look at me,” Frankie says insistently, and Gideon raises his eyes to him immediately.

Niall swears and moves away, scrubbing his hand through his hair in a short stabbing motion.

“I’ve got you an interview with Steven Hawksworth,” Frankie says, holding on to Gideon’s neck and forcing him to keep looking at him.

“He owes me a favour, and I’ve called it in.

He’s waiting at a studio in St Austell. You’ll go in now and deny everything.

Everything ,” he says with a heavy emphasis.

“Eli is just a friend of yours. Nobody special.” I flinch, waiting for Gideon to deny it, but he doesn’t.

Instead he watches Frankie as if hypnotised as the man carries on talking.

“He had just rescued that man and nearly fell over. You propped him up. Nothing else.” He nods his head firmly.

“Drop Jacinta in. No ,” he says sharply as Gideon looks at him.

“The time for doing it your way is gone, Gid. You need to listen to me. Steven won’t ask you anything difficult. ”

“But he’s known for asking bitchy questions and going full pelt at celebrities,” Silas says slowly.

“Not this time,” Frankie says smugly. “Put it this way, I have something on him that he doesn’t want known.

If he wants it to stay unknown, then he’ll do as I ask.

So, Gideon, you are going to put on the suit I have for you in the car.

Then you’re going to get in the car and you are going to lie your fucking arse off.

And when you’ve finished and your career is saved again, you will remember to thank me.

” He claps Gideon on the shoulder. “Come on, son, shake a leg.”

Gideon gets to his feet stiffly as if he’s a marionette, and Milo steps back, his hand falling away and finding Niall’s outstretched one.

“Sorry,” Gideon says hoarsely to him. “Sorry for breaking up the party.”

“Don’t do this,” Milo says softly. “Think about what you’re doing. You’re selling your soul. It’ll destroy you.” His eyes flicker to me. “It’ll destroy everything .”

Gideon hesitates for a second but then shakes his head and steps back stiffly. “Sorry,” he says again, his voice clearing a little bit but still wooden.

“I’ll come with you,” Frankie says decisively, but Gideon shakes his head immediately.

“I don’t want that, thank you. I need to be on my own for this.”

“Well, if you’re sure?”

For the first time Frankie seems unsure, but Gideon ignores him, moving away and towards the gate. His way forward takes him past me and without my brain telling it, my hand shoots out and stays him.

“Gideon,” I say softly, and a shudder runs over his body like a small wave breaking on the beach. He looks down at me, and I stare helplessly back. “Do you need me?” I ask.

He immediately shakes his head. “I have to do this on my own,” he says and, stung, I go to pull my hand back, but he holds on to it as if he can’t let go.

In that moment, I really look at him. His eyes are dark and distant, but somewhere underneath that, I can see my Gideon there.

He’s hidden under layers of blind panic and rage, but he’s there and it gives me the strength to smile at him.

“Well, I’m here if you need me,” I say softly.

“Will you still be here when I get back?”

I flinch because he just seems to be accepting that I’ll be leaving him at some point.

It breaks my heart. Instead of hugging him like I want to, I nod my head fiercely.

“I’ll be here,” I say steadily and firmly.

I squeeze his hand, heartened when he squeezes back.

“Be true to yourself,” I whisper. “Whether that’s staying hidden or coming out.

But make sure that it’s what you want and not what others tell you is best.”

He stares at me for a long moment, and his hand tightens almost painfully on mine. He opens his mouth to say something, but at that second Frankie stirs.

“Let him go, Eli,” he says angrily. “This is mainly your fucking fault. If he knows anything, Gid will bin you when this is all over.”

I stiffen, but for the first time since Frankie has arrived, Gideon’s face displays some emotion.

“Don’t you fucking talk to him like that,” he hisses at his manager, and Frankie steps back in surprise.

“He is nothing to do with you,” Gideon shouts.

“Fuck all. He’s mine, and you are not interfering in that. ”

For a second I think that Frankie is going to explode but then he visibly calms. “But you are still going to lie your arse off about him, aren’t you?” he says coldly.

Gideon stares at him, an emotion I can’t identify crossing his face. “You’re the boss,” he says slowly. Frankie smiles, and Gideon turns back to me. He lifts up my hand and kisses it. “I’ll see you when I get back?” he whispers, a pleading tone in his voice, and I nod.

“You will.”

And then he’s gone, disappearing round the corner and leaving a heavy silence.

Frankie hesitates and then mumbles something about getting the suit for him and disappears after him. I jump as a hand comes down on my shoulder. I look around to find Silas watching me with a concerned look on his face.

“Don’t worry,” he says in a low voice. “It’ll be alright.”

“Will it?” I ask in a hollow tone.

“Yes,” he says with a firm nod. He looks at Oz for his opinion.

It’s a totally natural reaction, as if the pair speak as a longstanding team.

Oz has sat throughout this whole exchange without speaking, his eyes as intent as a cat watching mice.

Now he smiles at his husband and then at me.

It’s sharp with an edge, but still kind and encompassing.

“It’ll be alright,” he says clearly, the Irish in his voice thick. “I’ve been watching Gideon for a while. It’ll be fine.”

“But w-what if he lies and goes back to his very t-tiring version of normal?” Milo says, his stutter noticeable.

“Then he does,” I say sadly. “It’s up to him and not any of us. He has to do this himself.”

“And if he l-lies? And denies knowing you?”

I shrug. “Then he does that. It’s not like I’ve been lied to. He’s been honest from the word go with me about who he is and what he can do.”

“That’s why I’m sure it’ll be alright,” Oz says, getting up and leaning against Silas, sure of his welcome. As Silas wraps his arms around him, Oz looks hard at me. “You’re the only person Gideon hasn’t lied to. Ask yourself why.”

I stand up. “I’m sorry, but I’m going to go back to the cottage just in case he needs anything.”

“Don’t worry,” Milo says, squeezing my arm. “Do what you’ve got to do.”