Page 67 of Ghost
She hums, looking out at the yard, and I sense a question on the tip of her tongue. If I was smart, I’d stand up and start kicking the soccer ball with Austin and Bea to avoid it, but I don’t.
“Why then?” she asks.
“Why what?”
“Why are you single?”
I rest my head back against the chair, close my eyes, and take a deep breath. I could lie to her, but like Bea said, lying hurts worse than the truth sometimes. And this is a truth I can’t take back.
“Because of Paulina.”
Five years later, and I still hate saying her name out loud. It stirs up every regret that lives inside me.
“You loved her?” Luna’s voice pitches with her question, and I sense a hint of jealousy from a girl I didn’t think capable of it.
Turning to look at her, I graze the back of her hand with my thumb. “Not like you’re thinking. She was like a sister to me. We grew up together, and after my familydied, she was there for me. She knew me outside of the club, and after a while, there weren’t many people like that anymore. You would have liked her.”
“Why do you think that?”
“Because she was sweet but always looking for trouble. Just like you.” I squeeze Luna’s hand. “And just like you, I should have kept her away from all this.”
I rake my hair back, and Luna turns in her seat to face me.
“What happened?”
“It started small. She came to my patching-in party and then another. And another. She started falling for the wrong kind of guy—”
“Bikers?”
“Iron Sinners.” I click my tongue, trying to harness my anger. “She thought she was in love. She dropped out of school and started dancing at one of their clubs. Her whole life was about him and then came the drugs. Everything changed.”
“I’m sorry.”
“She tried to get out when she caught him fucking one of the other girls at the clubhouse, and she came to me for help. I told her I’d fix it.”
“Did you?”
I shake my head. “Didn’t get the chance. He found out she came back to the Twisted Kings, and the Iron Sinners decided to send a message that nothing that was ours was untouchable. The things they did…”
I swallow hard, and Luna leans forward, listening.
“I should have never sent her home that night. I’ll never be able to erase the image of her the next morning, lying outside the property line.”
My mind flashes to the dark memory of Paulina’s naked body dumped at the Twisted Kings gate. She’d been beaten and raped—tortured. Patch didn’t go into details for my sake, but I know whatever they did had to have lasted for hours.
“It was all because she was close to me. If I had kept her away from the beginning, things could have been different. She was supposed to keep going to school. She was going to do something. And now with you—”
“I’m not her, Marcus.”
I want to believe that more than anything. “If anything happens to you…”
“It won’t.” She forces a smile, and I wish it was reassuring. “Thank you for telling me.”
She probably sees it as me opening up, but it should be a warning. If I ever found Luna like I did Paulina, I’d never survive it.
“So that’s why you kept your distance all those years?”
I nod. “There’s enough blood spilled on this land without adding people I care about to it. It was easier to just not get close to anyone again.”
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