Page 31 of Frat Around and Find Out (Peach State Fratbros #1)

I’m not surprised he could tell with just a look what I was thinking about. Not when he has something similar in his past.

“Yeah,” I say, and he reaches out, resting his hand on top of mine. “We took ice-skating lessons together when we were kids.”

“Oh my God,” he says, pulling his hand away, and starts unlacing his skates.

I take his wrist. “No, no. Please. I didn’t mean to mess this up.”

He turns to me, his eyes wide. “You think you’re messing this up by having an emotional reaction to something that meant a lot to you and your brother? Nothing is worth putting you through that, Lance.”

“But it’s not just that. Earlier when I was telling Mom and Dad about you, I was thinking how much I wish I could have told him. It would have been nice to have him there today.”

As his expression turns serious, I feel like I’ve ruined our date, but he says, “I know the feeling. Anytime anything good happens, I pull up my uncle’s number. I want to call and tell him what’s going on. I want to tell him about you, just like you want to tell Kacey about me.”

I rest my hand on his thigh.

“It’s hard for me,” he says, “because I know he’d want me to be happy, but sometimes when I’m happiest, it’s harder when I remember he’s not here anymore.”

His words cut to my core—the words of someone who really gets what I struggle with. I take his hand and roll it on my thigh, running my thumb over his palm.

“I think one of the reasons I avoid certain things Kacey and I enjoyed together is that I feel guilty enjoying them without him. But I also know that he, more than anyone else in the world, would want me to be happy. That day when you pranked us, I was thinking of something he once told me. It’s what convinced me to get out of the car in that ridiculous outfit.

“When I was in second grade, I lost some of my front teeth, and kids used to make fun of me because of it. I was so embarrassed, I didn’t tell anyone, but he noticed I wasn’t smiling as much.

He knew something was wrong, and when I confessed, he told me he got bullied when he was my age because he had braces.

I couldn’t imagine anyone making fun of him, so I asked him what he did, and he said, ‘Embarrassing stuff happens, and sometimes, you just gotta own it. Don’t let anything keep you from being happy.

’ ” It makes me tear up just thinking about it.

“He was only in middle school, but even now, it sounds wise, profound. And I did what he said. I started smiling more, not caring if anyone saw my teeth. And I made more friends, ones who didn’t mention anything about the gap.

I learned he was right, and it’s something I’ve reminded myself of anytime I get shy or insecure or worried. ”

Ty’s quiet for a moment. “He sounds like a really great brother.”

“He was,” I say quietly, my voice cracking slightly.

“Grant had little bits of wisdom he passed on to me too,” Ty says.

“Always encouraging me whenever I was down. Always there for me. What Dad did, leaving Mom and me, was stuck in my head for a long time. I just couldn’t get how he could have fathered a kid and didn’t want anything to do with him.

Something I thought about every Father’s Day, or when I’d see other kids with their dads at school events.

” He’s got this far-off look in his eyes, as though he’s been transported into a memory, and I’m hoping I haven’t brought up something horrible for him.

“One day, after a soccer event, my friend was being congratulated by his dad, and Grant and Mom were doing the same for me, but it just hit me hard, and he told me, ‘I get why you’re hurting, but don’t get so hung up on the things that go wrong that you miss out on the things going right.

’ Not always easy to remember, but it really reminds me to look at all the wonderful things I have in my life, even when things aren’t going great. ”

I grip his hand tighter. “They really just wanted us to be happy. And I know they’re right, and sometimes it feels like I’m betraying Kacey’s memory by refusing to have any fun like this. It’s just hard.”

Ty moves closer, putting his arm around me, and I bury my face in his chest. I’ve had plenty of times where I’ve buried my face in a pillow, trying to stifle my scream to keep Mom or Dad from hearing my pain, but it’s nice being able to hold him, someone who gets it, someone I don’t fear I’ll trigger by feeling this pain.

And it’s easy to forget where we even are as I hold him close, taking deep breaths until I feel I can manage my emotions again.

As I pull away, he looks me in the eyes. “Do you think you’re up for it? Own feeling like shit and go for it?”

I muster a smirk, appreciating how he’s referencing Kacey’s words of wisdom.

“Let’s try.” I push to my feet, collecting myself as I scan the skating rink once again for that image.

Ty and I walk up to the entrance, and I inspect the ice, taking a moment before getting on the other side and joining with the others already moving in clockwise motion around the rink.

I’m a little unsteady, like I was when Kacey and I were first learning together.

When I stumble, Ty grabs hold of me, keeping me on my feet.

“Whoa,” I say, laughing.

“Gonna have to keep an eye on you, aren’t I?”

“Maybe. It’s obviously been a minute.”

“You know damn well I can take it slow to begin with.”

I sneak a look at him, his smirk assuring me the play on words was intentional.

We skate around the rink a few times, and I get the hang of it again. Even though memories with Kacey are coming back to me, there’s something nice about being here with Ty, creating new memories.

At one point, Ty spins around and says, “Here. I wanna try to go backward.” He gives it a try but doesn’t really go anywhere. “What’s the trick?” he asks, assessing his feet.

“They have to actually move.”

“Very funny.” He gives it another go, moving slowly but managing it. “Hey, come on. That’s not so bad.” Admittedly, it’s not. And as he gets the hang of it, he stands a little taller, clearly proud of himself for his little stunt. “Fast learner, apparently.”

“I could have told you that,” I tease, and there’s a playfulness in his expression. I’m sure he’s thinking about the stuff we started messing around with a couple of months ago.

“We need to get out of everyone’s way,” he says, and when I make a face, he grabs my hand and guides me toward the middle of the rink, turning to me.

“If you think I’m skating backward after just remembering how to skate forward, you’re out of your mind.”

“Naw. It’s just been too long since I kissed that sexy mouth.”

“You wanna kiss me here.”

“I want to kiss you everywhere.” The way he says it, I can hear the desire in his tone, just how much he means it, and he moves quickly, taking my lips.

For having enjoyed our secret relationship for so long, I find that I enjoy being public like this even more.

No more need to keep our hands to ourselves.

No need for me to pretend I’m not totally into Ty.

I’m loving the way his lips and face are warming me up again. I embrace the joy I feared before we stepped out here. Don’t want it to end, and he doesn’t seem to either by the way he keeps nibbling at my lip before finally pulling away.

“Speaking of me not being able to keep my mouth off you, after we catch a few more rides, whose place we wanna head back to?”

“We’ve gone to your place a few times, so mine?”

He winces. “Wrong answer.”

“What? Why do you want to go back to your place?”

He glances around before leaning close and whispering, “Because I like fucking you in my bed.”

A rush of excitement moves through me. “That’s naughty, Rocky.”

“Whatever. You like getting this rock there too. So you can choose the easy way or the hard way.”

“What happens if I choose the hard way?”

“I haven’t really thought it out, since I know you’ll take the easy way.”

I laugh. “Oh, so you’re the bossy one today?”

“Yes, I am.”

He moves close and does a little spin, making it look effortless before he grabs my hand, undermining the move when he says, “That was pretty hot, right?”

Which has me laughing.

As fun as this is, though, I’m eager to get back to his place so he can fuck me in his bed.