Page 15 of Frat Around and Find Out (Peach State Fratbros #1)

Lance

I ’m in a funk, and I know it’s because of my conversation with Ty last night.

“I have an uncle… Had an uncle.”

As soon as he said those words, my heart ached for him. I could tell by the way his voice cracked, how he left behind the playful Ty I’m used to seeing around campus, just how special his uncle was to him.

But now, all I can think is how shit I was at being there for Ty. I’ve thought of all the things I should have told him so he’d know I understand what it’s like to watch someone you love fading right before your eyes.

But he knew, he must’ve. Not the details, of course, but the way he said it— “Everything okay with you, Lance? If there’s something you want to share, I’d listen too” —and the way he looked at me, it was as if I were transparent and he could peer into my soul, see this part of me I’m so good at hiding from the rest of the world.

I considered sharing what I went through with Kacey, but then, it felt like I’d be making his horrible tragedy all about me.

And I didn’t want him to feel like he had to comfort me when he was the one hurting.

The other issue was, I wasn’t sure I could keep it together if I started thinking about all the fun times I shared with Kacey. Christmases and Thanksgivings. Walking around the neighborhood on Halloween with friends in our Dragon Ball Z costumes, him as Goku, me as Gohan.

I’ve always felt like Ty and I understood each other—our competitive streaks, the way we care about our frats and our buddies. But what we discussed last night made me feel closer to him than any of the messing around. That stuff feels special too, no doubt, but in a very different way.

Even just imagining his mouth around me, how beautiful his face looked streaked with my cum, is enough to make my cheeks hot.

But now that I know what had him in such a weird state last night, I’m wishing I could have been the one blowing him, giving him relief. Although, I know from everything we’ve done it wouldn’t be entirely selfless of me.

As I walk around the rec center gym, picking up equipment that’s migrated throughout the day, I wish it were a more hectic day so I could get my thoughts on something other than the fact that I rushed out after Ty shared something so important with me.

“Hey, sexy,” I hear behind me, and turn to see Ash and Marty approaching.

I tense up.

“You headed off in a hurry this morning,” Marty says.

“Yeah, we just wanted to swing by and make sure everything’s all right.”

I’m not surprised they noticed I was acting strange. That’s one of the reasons I hurried through breakfast and left as soon as I could. And now I’m worried I’m as transparent as I was to Ty last night. That they might pick up on what’s on my mind too.

“Just wanted to get to work,” I lie.

“What time you get off?” Ash asks. “We were gonna grab something to eat in a bit.”

“Oh, it’s cool. I was gonna go straight back to the frat and finish up some homework.”

“Then get ready for your beauty pageant this evening?” Marty teases.

“It’s a bachelor auction, not a beauty pageant,” I remind him.

Activate Kindness’s auction got big a couple of years ago after Alpha Theta Mu’s own Troy Locklear brought a lot of attention to the event. Now it’s become an annual tradition for the frats to support the cause.

I’ll be there, and so will Ty.

“Gonna get a pump in at the gym to show off the guns?” Marty asks. “Or maybe practice your speech about how to end world hunger?”

Ash and I share a laugh.

“Could you imagine if we had to listen to some Sigma Alpha ass giving a speech about the solution to climate change?” Ash jokes, and I tense up.

I normally wouldn’t think twice about ragging on Sigma Alpha, but now I feel protective because of Ty.

“Sigma Alpha’s not that bad.” It’s like I can’t keep the words down, and as I say them, their expressions twist up.

“Um…” Marty says. “Ash, do you think Sigma Alpha learned how to brainwash our bros?”

“I think maybe they have. Lance, you’re the one who’s always ragging on Sigma Alpha. You know we don’t actually hate those guys, right? It’s all in good fun.”

“I don’t know why I said that. I’m kinda tired from being up last night.”

“You left the party early,” Marty notes. “Oh…wait… Oh…” His knowing look suggests he suspects something .

Did he see me head off with Ty? Did he catch something we whispered to one another when we thought no one could hear us?

“Huh? Am I missing something?” Ash asks.

My heart’s racing before Marty says, “Somebody’s been hanging out with Angie an awful lot recently.”

I breathe a sigh of relief as Ash prods, “Lance…”

“What? No. I mean, yes, we’ve hung out, but there’s nothing happening between me and Angie.”

Marty eyes me skeptically. “Dude, why do you have to pretend? Angie’s hot, and you have fun together.”

“I’m not pretending. We’ve only hung out once since that night she stayed at Alpha Theta Mu, and there’s nothing there at all.”

And if they knew whom I was really boning for, they’d really get just how not interested in Angie I am right now.

“Okay, man, I believe you,” Marty says, his tone suggesting he doesn’t even a little bit.

“I think Marty’s projecting here,” Ash chimes in.

“What? No I’m not.”

Marty says that so defensively, even I don’t believe him, and I use the opportunity to redirect the conversation. “You were awfully interested when she was over that first day.”

Marty’s shoulders square off. “Don’t you have some balls to tend to? Isn’t there a rule against talking to friends on the clock or something?”

“What are you gonna do?” Ash asks. “Turn him in?”

“Maybe,” Marty says with a smirk.

“Okay, come on.” Ash rests his hand on Marty’s back. “We’ll get out of your hair. Mart, you can tell me about how you’re crushing on Angie over lunch.”

“I’m not crushing on her!” he insists, and then we say our goodbyes and the guys leave.

I’m relieved they didn’t press about my weird mood today. I love my guys, but I don’t want to get into it with them. Not about this.

After my shift, I hop in my car and consider calling Mom or Dad.

I could talk to Dad and tell him about all the feelings that came up during my conversation with Ty. And we could hold space for the grief that remains from the great guy we lost. But instead, I pull up my last DMs with Ty on Insta, from last night after I got back to Alpha Theta Mu.

ME: Thank you again for sharing that. Sorry for having to head out, but hope you enjoy the rest of the party.

TY: I really appreciate your listening. And the other stuff too. ;)

Even with how heavy the night was, I smile at the thought of other stuff before messaging.

ME: Hey there.

I figure he might be at work, but he responds surprisingly quickly.

Ty: Hey, what’s up?

I hesitate, struggling with what to tell him. Been thinking about my dead brother all day because of our chat last night seems like a conversation killer, so I go for the next best thing.

ME: Not much.

ME: You ready to see me earn way more money than you for charity?

TY: You make more than me ? Not gonna happen.

ME: Pretty sure it will.

TY: Depends. You gonna be wearing that G-string? In which case, I’d say you’re not playing fair.

I snicker. The fact that we’re joking around like we normally would sets me at ease, assures me I didn’t do anything to make him uneasy during our conversation .

TY: Speaking of which, not seeing any prank from Alpha Theta Mu. You guys give up?

ME: Oh, you’ll be getting it.

TY: Counting on it. Looking forward to being impressed.

ME: Have I let you down before?

TY: You definitely have not.

There’s a rush because I know he’s talking about the stuff we’ve been doing.

ME: Seriously, though. Before we just go back to normal, I wanted to let you know, if you did need to talk to me again about anything…and I do mean anything, I’m open to that.

ME: And also, if you don’t want to talk, I get that too.

The ellipsis appears, then disappears.

Oh, the cruel world of texting!

TY: I can think of some things I’d want to get together with you to do, but it only involves the fun stuff.

I chuckle.

ME: Could use that after the day I’ve had.

TY: You should swing by.

ME: Must get ready for the auction. We don’t have much time.

TY: Do we need much time? ;)

I don’t hesitate before replying: Are you at Sigma Alpha now?

*

I’m surprised when I find myself at Sigma Alpha.

But despite everything going on in my head—or maybe because of it—I want to see him again. I want to know he’s truly okay after our chat.

Ty greets me at the door in a tank top and athletic shorts. His hair’s a little tousled, and is it just me, or does he look even sexier than he did last night?

“Hey, man,” he says. “Thank you for coming over. ”

“To enemy territory, you mean?” I ask, and my teasing makes him crack a smile.

He guides me up to his room and grabs me a White Claw. He sips on his own while I drink some of mine.

“I guess that was a lot for anyone to hear, and I probably shouldn’t have trauma-dumped on you,” he says.

“I don’t think that’s considered trauma-dumping. I made it clear I wanted you to share. We all go through shit, and it was a lot weighing on you. I can’t imagine not having someone you can talk to about that stuff. I’m the one who should be apologizing for rushing out like that.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” Ty says. “You were great.”

“I could have done better.”

“I’m not really sure that’s true,” he insists before quieting. “Are you okay?”

There it is again. He knows something. I can see it in those bright blue eyes, set on me, like they’re probing into my soul.

I start to say something, but the words catch in my throat. I remind myself this isn’t just about me needing to get it off my chest. I don’t want him feeling so fucking alone. Because damn, I know how alone this shit can feel.

“Last night when you asked me if I was okay,” I say, “you could tell I had my own loss, couldn’t you?”

He nods.