Page 98 of Fourth and Long

Seriously, I want to cry. I sniffle a little as he says, “I’ve already talked to management. I suggested they offer you a long-term contract, but they didn’t require my advice. They started drafting your offer before I finished telling them I wasn’t coming back.”

My heart feels like it’s going to gallop out of my chest. I swipe at the tears gathering in my eyes.

This is it—the chance I’ve been waiting for. A million thoughts tumble through my head—I can’t wait to tell Ellie, and Cam, and my family—but I push them away and try to focus on Randy. He must be devastated that we lost, and he’s hanging up his cleats. A good friend would ask him if he’s okay.

I must be wearing all my thoughts on my face, because he says, “I’m not dying. I’ll still be around.”

“You seem…happy,” I venture.

“Well…” He points in the direction of the field. “That game sucked. I would have preferred to go out with a ring, or at least play a decent game, but most players lose their final one, right? Not many guys get to finish with a win.” He raises his left brow. “I have it on good authority that I’m Hall of Fame bound…”

“You are,” I interrupt, and then I hesitate. “Maybe in a couple of weeks—after you’ve had time to think about it—you’ll change your mind.”

“I will not unretire.”

He’s too adamant for me not to believe him. “We’re going to miss you.” I lean over and wrap him in a quick hug.

When I release him, he chuckles. “You might miss my sterling company. However, out there”—he points toward the field again—“I don’t think you’ll miss me too much.”

“Well…I’ll miss not having a hand in losing this game,” I joke.

His chuckle turns into a laugh. “I might be jealous if you win next year.” He clasps my shoulder and tips his head to the side. “I’m going to grab a shower. We’re going to wait to announce the retirement until tomorrow. Press conference at three.”

I nod as he moves away.

I decide to skip the showers. I’m not very sweaty, and I’ve got a strange mix of emotions swirling in my gut. I don’t have any press obligations, so once I’ve changed into street clothes, I head to the family area.

Ellie’s eyes snap to me as soon as I enter the room. She moved to Sacramento with me during the offseason. I was terrified to ask, but she didn’t hesitate once I did.

Looking back, I can’t believe we spent so many months avoiding our feelings. She’s the opposite of a distraction. She always was.

She moves through the crowd and slips into my arms, then holds me tight for a second. “Sorry about the loss.” She pulls back a little. “You ready to go?”

She knows I hate hanging around after a loss.

I nod, and she clutches my hand all the way to the car.

When I climb in, my hands grip the steering wheel. “Randy is retiring,” I whisper.

“Oh.” Her hand darts out to clench my forearm. “What does that mean?”

“He thinks they’ll offer me a long-term deal.” I squeeze my eyes shut against the wave of emotions. I’m fucking happy…and fucking terrified at the same time.

“Slater,” she says, putting her hand on my cheek. “You’re ready.”

I swallow and look at her. She believes in me, and I believe in myself. I lean forward and press my lips to hers. “I love you.”

As eager as I am to be the starter, football isn’t the source of my happiness anymore.

She is.