Page 23 of Forged By Malice (Beasts of the Briar #3)

22

Rosalina

I follow the winding path through the cavernous halls of Keep Hammergarden, counting doorways and turns until I’m standing before a set of beautifully carved oak doors. Last night, Ez gave Dayton and me instructions on where his chamber was located, but this place is a maze. It’s as if a castle, a forest, and a cave were combined.

Oh well. If this is the wrong room, what’s the worst that could happen?

That terrifying masked man could answer, I think. Kairyn, Ezryn’s brother. Everything about him sets me on edge. Before I lose my nerve, I rap my knuckles on the door.

“Who is it?”

A breath of relief floods out of me at the sound of Ezryn’s muffled voice. “Rosalina.”

There’s a beat of silence, then: “Come in.”

Slowly, I crack open the door and slip inside. The chamber is stunning, flooded with light from massive windows looking out to the city. Like most of the keep, the walls are made of the mountain’s natural stone, creating a sense of raw beauty.

My eyes are drawn to the huge bed, draped in gauzy fabrics. The pillows look heavenly soft, and it seems far too big for one person. For some reason, the perfectly made-up bed looks like an unkept promise, an invitation to muss the sheets and send the pillows flying.

I take a breath and search for Ezryn. The rush of water sounds adjacent to the bed, and mist sprays out from beyond a pane of frosted glass. My throat clenches. Behind the glass is a man’s silhouette, light and shadows teasing his shape.

Water streams from a hole in the wall, cascading down the rocky surface. It’s like an indoor waterfall, a shower that seems carved from nature itself. And Ezryn’s in there right now.

My mouth suddenly feels bone-dry. Though he’s only a blurry silhouette, I can make out the lean lines of his body, usually hidden behind his armor. His arms raise up, fingers running through his hair. I remember when I was able to tangle my own hands in his thick waves, both wanting to cherish the feel of him and being terrified of how temporary I knew it was.

I drift closer. He turns, his face nothing but obscured shadow. But I swear I can make out the line of his nose and the curve of his lips. My fingers remember everything, a phantom touch.

Unconsciously, I take another step. This single pane is the only thing between me and that mysterious smile I’ve seen in my mind’s eye. The only thing between me and his skin…

My eyes drift down. His back is to me now, and I chide myself as I wonder if he only turned—

“Just finishing up washing,” he says. “I’ll be out in a moment.”

“Oh! Uh, yeah. No hurry.” Heat rushes from my chest up to the tips of my pointed ears, and I stiffly walk back to the bed and sit on the edge.

A shuffle and the ting of metal sounds from beyond the glass, and then Ezryn steps out.

He’s wearing a helm I’ve never seen before; the same style, but a brilliant starlight silver.

And he has a towel wrapped around his waist.

And that’s it.

Every nerve in my body lights up. There’s a voice in my head screaming at me not to be a lecherous perv, but the lecherous perv part is too strong, and I fully drink him in from the bottom of his long legs to the crest of his helm.

He stands with one arm leaning against the pane of glass, well-defined chest, covered in dark hair on full display. Water drips down his tawny skin, begging to be licked. Muscles ripple over his arms and abdomen.

He tilts his helmet, and the glint of light on the visor almost makes it look like he’s narrowing his eyes. “So…”

“Huh?” I answer. Then I realize my mouth is half-hanging open, and my eyes are practically out of their sockets. And I was the one who showed up in his room. Words would be nice right about now.

It’s just that I’ve only ever caught glimpses of his skin: the line of wrist between his armor and his gloves, the beautiful curve of neck under his helmet. And each of these were like treasures to be squirreled away. But now…

Now he’s on display like a piece of art, and merely looking doesn’t feel like it could ever satisfy.

“You needed me?” he adds. I always thought it was his armor that made him seem so still, but even like this, he barely moves. The subtle nods of his helm are all I have to go on.

I look down, folding my hands in my lap. “I wanted to make sure you were okay. Everything happened so quickly yesterday.”

He sighs. “Everything may have happened quickly for us, but I think things have been brewing in the Spring Realm for a long time. In my heart, I knew I was needed here. I only hope I’m not too late.”

“We’ll get to the bottom of this. Dayton and I can start investigating the stolen Spring steel. And Kel and Farron should be here any day.” I stand up and close the distance between us. It feels like the easiest thing in the world. “You’re not alone, Ezryn.”

His hand drifts up and pushes a curl of hair off my face. “Trust me, Petal, I have never doubted your intrepid heart.”

I place my hand over his, holding the warmth of his palm to my cheek. “Then what are your doubts? Ever since we’ve returned from Autumn, you’ve been distant. If you’re not in the Briar, you’re training or alone in your chamber.”

His other hand cups the opposite side of my cheek. “You find the good in all things. But trust me when I tell you, every decision I have ever made has been the wrong one. Even coming back to Spring and sitting upon the throne … Who am I to claim myself a better leader than Kairyn? Now, I must decide his fate once again.”

“I don’t buy it.” My fingernails dig into his skin. “Every decision has been the wrong one? What about choosing to stand with Farron in battle? What about saving Dayton’s life? What about—” My voice breaks with laughter and emotion. “What about not killing me on the bridge all those months ago? What about this?” I grab his hand and place it on my left wrist, on the skin he healed for me back in Autumn.

His helm shakes side to side. “Those weren’t choices to be made. They were just the right things to do.”

“Everything is a choice.” My hand drifts to his chest. I flick a smoldering gaze up at him.

He’s quiet for a long moment, breath reverberating through the helm. “Rosalina, I’ve warned you about the decisions I make.”

“Tell me,” I whisper, “does this feel right?”

Because for me it does. Like all the anxiety I’ve felt since I arrived in Spring and saw him facing his brother alone in the throne room, all but ebbs from my body. Like despite everything on the horizon, this moment could protect us from the world.

Another aching beat passes in stillness, my pounding heart and the rushing water the only sound. Then Ezryn grabs me around the waist, spinning us until my back is against the mist-sprayed wall. His hand tightly grips my jaw, the visor’s gaze penetrating. “Isn’t that just it, Petal? Why does this feel so right? You are mated twice over—”

“My mates love you. They love you, Ezryn. For once, stop thinking about everyone else. And choose me.”

My words seem to electrify him. A growl resounds from beneath his helm, and he drifts his hands over the curve of my waist to my hips. We’re so close to the spray of the shower, and I push away from him, walking backward and holding him with my gaze.

The water rushes over me, plastering my hair to my face and soaking through the thin pink dress I’m wearing. Ezryn’s palms press on the wall and the glass pane, trapping me.

I run my hands along the dress as it clings to my curves. The outline of my breasts is visible, and the helm’s gaze is laser focused on them.

“Come into the water with me, Ezryn.”

He does.

His hands tear the soaking dress up over my body. Water tings off his metal helm. I stroke along his collarbone, his muscular shoulders, clutch his biceps. I’m as starving for his touch as he is for mine.

He cups my breast and moans. The cool metal drops to the crook of my neck as he rocks his hips against mine. Through the towel, his hard length juts forward, pressing against me. Now it’s my turn to moan.

“Get rid of this. Now. Right now.” I tug on the towel.

He laughs, then hooks his fingers under the fabric. I push back so I can get a better view.

“What are you doing?” he asks.

I cross my arms. “Come on, don’t make it weird. I’ve been waiting for this moment for a long time.”

Now I’ve done it. He takes his hands away from the towel and instead leans over me. “A long time?”

A flush spreads across my face. How can I tell him the first time I saw him sitting at the dining table in Castletree, I pictured him throwing me over it? “I mean, a respectable amount of time that is not at all creepy or weird.”

“Don’t worry.” He takes my hand and guides it over his bulging length hidden by the towel. “I’ve been thinking of you for a long time.”

I gasp, caressing the hardness. “You saw me when we were in the Below.”

“I could pass a thousand seasons staring at you and never have my fill of your beauty. I want you when the cherry blossoms fall in spring, and during the balmy nights of summer. I want you on a forest floor filled with autumn leaves and shivering in winter’s snow.”

My hands tighten around his length. “Then take off your damn towel.”

He drops it with a wet thunk, and I intake a deep breath. Ezryn stands before me, completely bare except for his helm. The massive cock between his leg bobs, and a stream of water runs down its length.

Our hands are over each other in a moment: my lips on his shoulder, the steady stream of water beating over us, his steel hardness in my hand.

He groans and dips his head to my breasts. I shiver at the cold metal pressing against my nipples. Then he makes an agitated growl. “I crave the taste of you.”

His huge hand cups the apex of my thighs before I have a chance to respond. I cry out and grind against him.

“You’re so beautifully wet for me, Baby Girl,” he murmurs. “I want you to come around my fingers.”

“Yes, yes!” My lips give way to teeth as I bite his shoulder. Two large fingers press against my entrance before sinking deep. My grip tightens on his cock, and I stifle my cry against his skin.

Bursts of pleasure erupt through my core as he curls his fingers inside me. My pace increases along the length of his cock. I clutch it for dear life, barely hanging on through the rush of ecstasy.

“Ezryn,” I gasp, “if you keep—”

“If I keep what?” The fingers buried in me whorl and pulse, and his other hand snatches my dripping hair and pulls.

The sensation sends my climax roiling over me like the pulsing waterfall; I collapse against him, my heart near feeling like it will take flight from my chest.

“So good, Baby Girl,” he murmurs. “You’re so good for me.”

He holds me up by my waist, and I lean against his chest, blinking tears and water out of my eyes. His cock is pressed against my lower belly, and I pull myself tighter against him. It’s so hard and thick … I find myself drifting down to my knees.

“What are you doing?”

The misty water highlights his body as I glance up. “Worshipping the High Prince of Spring.”

And he does look like a High Prince now more than ever, his body like a statue, the starlight silver helm gleaming.

“Rosalina,” he begins, but I don’t give him a moment to protest.

“You’re not good at letting people take care of you. But I’m going to take care of you, Ezryn.”

With that, I take the head of his cock in my mouth and twirl my tongue. He groans, sinking against the stone. With one hand, I grip his shaft and with the other, I cup his balls.

His body goes rigid as I run my tongue up the seam, taking time to taste the pearly sheen on his tip.

“Fuck,” he breathes. “You’re such a good girl.”

Encouraged, I open my mouth and take him deeper. My hand clutches the base of his cock. He grabs a fistful of my hair, legs shaking. I suck in a breath through my nose, reveling in being able to take so much of him.

I blink up, a half-smile on my stuffed lips, and he rolls his head back, groaning. “Seven realms, you’re beautiful.”

His praise makes my chest heave, and I work him with my mouth and fingers until he starts thrusting against me. His tight grip on my hair keeps my head steady as he fucks my mouth, gently at first, and then harder and harder.

“You’re so good,” he groans. “Too good.”

I drop my hand from his balls and press against his hips to stop his movement. Then I pop off his cock, a line of spit dripping out of my mouth. “Are you going to give me your cum?”

His cock twitches in front of my face. “What?”

My voice becomes a whine. “Will you come in my mouth?”

He runs a hand over his visor, slicking away the water. “You want me to…”

“ Please .”

“Fuck.” In answer, he grabs the back of my neck and shoves his cock into my mouth. I suck him greedily, dragging my tongue around his swollen head, desperate for him.

“Rose, I-I’m—”

I open my throat as much as I can and squeeze his balls tight in my hand. With a roar, his cock throbs, then erupts in my mouth. I take him deeper and suck harder, eager not to miss a single drop. His hands are like vice grips in my hair, and then all at once, he relaxes. His hands lower, his knees buckle, and I swallow one more time.

“Come here,” he murmurs, and pulls me up by my elbows until we’re chest to chest, the hot water streaming over us.

He runs a hand over my lips, cleaning me. “Perfect.”

I smile, his praise addictive.

Ezryn leans his helmet against my forehead. “I choose you, Rosalina,” he whispers. “Whatever you’re willing to give me.”

The words nearly escape my lips: everything, everything, everything.

But maybe it’s the rush of the water waking me up or I’m not the same idiot girl I was yesterday, but I know I can’t say yes.

Because I’d given everything to Dayton, only for the world to remind us that it doesn’t work like that. It’s not enough to want something with your whole heart. It’s not enough for every part of you to be screaming that this is right.

I can’t break my heart again.

“Will you let me have you, Petal?” Ezryn continues when I don’t say anything. “Let me lay you on the High Prince’s bed. I will take you in a way that only a fae of Spring can.”

My heart feels like it may rip from my chest in order to get to him, but I push out of the shower, grabbing a second towel from the floor and wrapping it around myself.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, following me.

Tears cloud my vision. “I want to be with you, Ezryn. I want it more than there are words. But I can’t give myself to you in that way.”

He looks down. “I understand.”

“No, you don’t.” I intake a shaky breath. “This is going to sound crazy and greedy and selfish, but in here, ” I tap my chest, “I feel like you should belong to me. And I feel that way about Dayton, too.”

“So belong to me,” he growls. “I will take you and keep you safe and—”

“And what, Ezryn?” I cry. “Leave me when your mate finally comes along? Or refuse to find your mate altogether and abandon Spring to the curse? I thought I could break Dayton’s curse. No, I knew it. But you know what happened? Nothing. Nothing, Ez. We made love and everything stayed the same.”

Ezryn shakes his head back and forth. “No, nothing stayed the same. Because Dayton is different because of you, whether you’re mates or not. He is a better man, Rosalina, and fuck the curse, fuck the Enchantress, and fuck these damned bonds that get to dictate our lives. It doesn’t matter—”

“It matters to me!” I scream. “I’m not going to just sit here and watch as your roses wither, and you and Dayton lose more and more of yourselves to the curse. When Dayton and I made love, it didn’t help him. It only hurt.”

Ezryn rushes to me, guiding my face to look up at him. “Listen to me, Rose. One day, Dayton and I may meet our mates. It doesn’t change what’s happening between us right now. I would never ask you to do anything you’re not comfortable with. But don’t think for one second you are a burden.”

I pull away from him and stumble to lean against the bedpost. Looking over my shoulder, I whisper, “I can’t do it again, Ez. Can’t keep hurting people. Everything felt so alive in my heart when Dayton and I made love. But it didn’t matter. The curse didn’t break. We’re not mates.”

A choked cry escapes his lips. “What does it matter if you’re not mates? Why can’t I love you?”

Heavy silence thunders through the room. Did he say…

Ezryn looks to the side, fists clenching. “Why can’t he love you … I meant why can’t Dayton love you.”

I close my eyes, fighting back tears. “Because my love will only hold him back.”

Only hold you back.

Ezryn staggers to the wall, and it seems like he’s barely holding himself up. “So, what now? We pretend like none of it matters?”

I wrap my arms around his waist, burying my face into his back. I inhale his scent: that sweet and earthy blend that smells like home. “You will always matter to me.”

He sighs and turns around, pulling me into a hug. I take a deep breath, fighting the sob that wants to wrack through my chest. Because I don’t know where to go from here. I know for my own sake I can’t give myself to Ezryn. But I can’t remove myself from him either.

“Do you trust me?” I ask.

“Always.”

I close my eyes. Then I reach up and put my hands on either side of his helmet. He doesn’t stop me. Slowly, I inch it off, then hold the heavy metal in one hand. And with it, I hold his trust in a single blink.

Softly, carefully, I stand on my tiptoes and brush my lips against his. His warm breath caresses me. My free hand traces his jaw, rough with stubble, as our kiss grows from soft to needy. One second more , I tell myself second after second until finally I pull away.

I place the helm back on his head and tug down, feeling to make sure it’s in place. Then I blink my eyes open. “You have a realm to rule and a curse to break, High Prince. And I’ll be at your side looking after you for as long as I can.”