Being chased by hordes of naked elves was less than a pleasant experience. We ran into a dozen guards on our attempt to get away. My broomstick broke right away, so I ended up with a short sword instead. I wondered if we should try to avoid killing them, but when Luken used magic to blast off the head of one of our attackers, I decided staying alive was more important.

I wish the elves hadn’t taken my staff. The sword didn’t give me as much reach and was far less versatile. It was only thanks to Luken’s magic that we could escape the palace in one piece. Once we were in the forest, we were running. Endlessly running, until I was panting for breath and stumbling over my own feet.

Luken scooped me into his arms and twisted me neatly onto his back, and kept running. I clung around his waist and shoulders, making myself as small as possible so I wouldn’t get caught on the foliage. I wondered at his stamina. It seemed like he could go forever… which only made the relatively short sex we’d had more suspect.

I was fragile in comparison to him. Even though I was part vampire now, I was more breakable. Could he even enjoy himself with me? Was that why it was so much easier for him to fight the draw that kept bringing me back to him? He couldn’t want me as much as I wanted him, because otherwise, how could he hold back? He said he wouldn’t have me again until I begged for his touch, but the truth was, he could easily make me beg for him.

And this was the last thing I wanted, to feel sexually inadequate for a man whom I didn’t even want to want.

We came to a stop, and I blinked. My legs were stiff around his waist, but I quickly unwound myself and lowered to the forest floor. We were in among a group of ferns twice as tall as I was, with feathery fronds that reached out to tickle my cheeks. Ahead of us was a dark slash in the otherwise silver forest, a narrow opening that must be the cave.

Luken folded the map Donelle gave us and tucked it back into his tunic.

“That didn’t take as long as I expected,” I said suspiciously. “Are we sure this isn’t a trick?”

“I can assure you it’s not. The real trials will come once we’re inside.” Luken nodded toward the slash.

I stepped toward it. “We should get started, then.”

Luken caught my arm. “We have some time before the elves catch up. They won’t follow us into the cave, so we should rest out here while we can. We’re both exhausted and we need to have clear minds for what comes next.”

“But we don’t have the time. If Draven has gone in already…” I clenched my hands. “We’ve lost so much time already.”

“I know. But dying because we’ve pushed ourselves too hard won’t save Darcie or Thessa.”

He was right. My shoulders slumped, and I ran a hand through my hair. I caught several knots and glanced at him again. The crazed look from when I met him in the hallway was gone, but his hair was still a mess. What happened?

Thinking about that was a mistake. How could I rest when I still had all of these questions and fears bouncing around in my head?

I wasn’t ready to ask that one yet, so I jumped on another. “The queen said she was surprised that you hadn’t compelled me back to the palace.”

Luken grunted as he stepped into the ferns. “We should find a place that isn’t quite so exposed. We don’t know if Draven has come through, and I’d hate for him to find us sleeping.”

He held back the fern for me to follow him. I was tempted to be stubborn, but he was right. The best thing we could do was hide ourselves. We left the path and wandered a few meters away until we found a nice pile of bramble that would afford us a little protection. There was a hollow scooped out from beneath it, and we wiggled our way in. The bramble was deep enough that when we got to the back of it, we were surrounded on all sides with thorns, so thick I couldn’t see any of the forest. It was dark in here and cool enough that Luken’s body was warm.

“We need to talk,” I said softly. It felt important to be quiet now that we were hiding.

Luken sighed. “I suppose we do.”

“Can you compel me?”

He shifted toward me so both our faces were bathed in the light from his amber eyes. “I haven’t ever compelled you. And I will never do it.”

“But you can,” I whispered.

He flinched but nodded.

Despite the warmth of his body, goosebumps rose on my arms. He could make me do whatever he wanted. It would be easy for him. After what I witnessed, I knew it would be. And if he could do it, then what was stopping him? If he was really so obsessed with keeping me alive…

“Why don’t you just compel me to return to the castle with you?”

Luken sighed but didn’t answer.

“You can’t do that,” I complained, frustration making my voice rise. I grabbed hold of his tunic as though I could shake the answers from him. “I just learned that you can compel me to do anything you want and now you’re refusing to talk to me about it? Don’t you understand how terrifying it is, knowing that someone else can just take something so important? Why don’t you do it? Answer me.”

Again, he didn’t answer. Instead, he asked, “You thought I slept with Donelle.”

My cheeks went hot. “That’s not what we’re talking about.”

“But it’s related. You don’t trust me.”

I opened and closed my mouth a few times, trying to work up a good lie that would put an end to this line of questioning. It wasn’t any of his business what I felt or what I thought or… or was it? “If I answer you, will you answer me?”

“Yes.”

“Fine. Yes. Yes, I thought you were sleeping with her. I came to her room and I saw her riding someone with dark hair. I couldn’t see his face, but she was all over you before I was dragged out of there and… and she’s so beautiful,” I muttered, hating how petulant I sounded.

“You were jealous,” he murmured.

“No.” The lie was obvious.

The corners of his mouth twitched. “You were jealous.”

“I was angry,” I said, not wanting to admit just how tied up my feelings were.

“Why?”

I snorted and rolled my eyes to stare past his head. “Because of everything! Because you didn’t tell me why we were there, you didn’t warn me about what to expect, because there were people fucking on every surface in that palace, and it made me feel like an unwilling participant. Because you forced me to marry you. You didn’t ask, you didn’t give me time to adjust, you just commanded, and I had no choice.”

“I had to marry you quickly, to protect you,” he answered. “I’ve never been… exclusive with my blood donors and I didn’t want any of the others to get the wrong idea. I had to make sure everyone in the world knew I would burn them to the ground if they tried to touch you.”

“You didn’t tell me that.” I resisted the urge to move away from him. The thorns at my back proved it wouldn’t be a good idea. “And now we’re married, and I think those vows are sacred. So I’m not running off fucking other people, but if you slept with her, it means that our vows mean nothing to you.”

Luken touched my cheek, and I slapped him away, scratching my hand on the brambles for my efforts.

“Elara, I didn’t betray you. Those vows mean something to me, too. I’m not my father,” Luken said. His voice was low, gravelly with… anger? Was he angry with me?

I searched his face but couldn’t tell if it was anger or something else.

“It wasn’t me you saw. I didn’t sleep with her. You’re the only one I want.” He reached for me, pulling me tight against him. “If there was room in this place for you to top me, I’d say let’s fucking do it. You are the only one I want to fuck. The only one I want to kiss and hold.”

“Even though I’m only—” I cut myself off, unwilling to admit the insecurities that had reared their ugly heads. I started to pull away, but he let me, so I stopped. It felt too nice to have his arms around me.

Luken rubbed his nose along my jaw. “Only what? Divinely sexy? Strong and stubborn? Quick? Even though you know exactly what you want, and you let me know it?”

I shivered as his breath wafted over my neck. “Only one person?” I offered, lifting my chin to give him better access.

“I’ve never been one for group sex.”

I pushed slightly, wanting to see his face. “So you have had orgies?”

Luken’s jaw tightened in the way I was coming to realize it meant he didn’t want to talk about it. “Yes. Three hundred and fifty years is a long time. I’ve done many things, Elara. But all of that is in the past. Holding you like this is better than any wild sex parties I’ve attended.”

“Just how many wild sex parties have you attended?” I shuddered. “And was she part of any of them?”

Luken growled. “What does it matter what happened before we met? If I slept with Donelle, do you really think I would want to? Open the bond, and I’ll show you how I feel.”

The implications of his words made me go cold. I pulled away as best as I could, staring into his eyes. They were bright, searching my face, anger, and defiance and pleading all at once in his expression. He was right. I’d seen the way he reacted to the elves, and specifically Donelle. He didn’t want her to touch him. He’d tolerated it because of the situation we were in.

Shame welled in me.

For one thing, his past was in the past. If I’d been that old, I doubted I would still be a virgin, either. I’d have probably joined in a few of the orgies they had at the assassin’s coven, too, if I wasn’t holding onto my virginity like it was some precious treasure. If I hadn’t been a virgin in his bed—if I’d slept with a hundred, a thousand, others—it wouldn’t have changed the way Luken felt for me. Why should his past partners be something that I worried myself over?

But most of all… I’d been angry at him. Blaming him for Donelle’s attention. She was the one who held all the power in the Silver Forest, and yet I’d thought the worst of him.

I started shaking as the cold went through me. “If anything happened, it would be my fault.”

Luken pulled me close again. He touched my chin, his thumb running along my lower lip. “Nothing happened.”

“But it could have. We were only there because of me, and if she’d demanded—”

“Shhh.” He pressed his fingers over my lips. “We can’t drown ourselves in ‘ifs.’ We need to rest, regain our strength, and face what comes next. Dwelling on what might have happened will only freeze us.”

I pressed my face into shoulder, continuing to shake. What made it worse was that I knew this wasn’t going to change anything. Not really. I savored his warmth and the feeling of him close to me right now. I believed him about Donelle and wanting nobody but me. But as soon as tomorrow came—or whatever counted as tomorrow—I’d be back to being as prickly as the brambles around us.

I was many things, but honest wasn’t one of them.

Luken adjusted his hold on me, laying his arm beneath my head, changing our positions slightly so I’d be more comfortable. He was so tender about it all that I found myself relaxing, despite the guilt that still ate me up inside.

“I’m going to hate you again when I wake up,” I warned him as my eyes started to close.

Luken chuckled. “I know. But maybe you’ll hate me a little bit less. Maybe you’ll trust me a little more. Sleep, Elara. I’m here. Everything is going to be okay.”

Oh, I wanted to believe him. So much that right now, in the moments before I fell into slumber, I let myself do just that. I still hated him—didn’t I—but maybe I wouldn’t hate him forever.