Page 20 of Follow Me to Your Heart

I prayed my eyes were deceiving me, but they weren’t.

I scrolled through the photos of Cage and Lorie someone had sent me on FameVSYou, allowing the droplets of pain to fall freely onto my pillow.

When I talked to Cage last night, he told me he was going home after he and Red finished their rounds. So how in the hell did he end up wherever Lorie was? It didn’t make sense to me, and honestly, I wasn’t sure if I needed it to. When it all boiled down to it, Cage lied to me.

I sent the pictures to Taylor, put my phone on ‘Do Not Disturb,’ and rolled over.

One deep, shaky exhale, and I broke down.

It felt as if Cage had my heart in his hand and was squeezing it tighter with each breath I took.

Whenever I closed my eyes, all I envisioned were the pictures of them.

The tightness in my chest slowly eased and was replaced with a burning sensation that coursed through my body.

Unbeknownst to me, I’d lay there for an hour, allowing my sadness to fester into anger.

Sometimes, I hated how my mind worked. The number of different scenarios I came up with was sickening.

It only made my emotions worse to the point I’d gotten out of the bed and was putting some clothes on.

Daddy wasn’t at home which was probably the best for what I had in mind.

Since Daddy left me the keys to one of the cars, I was about to pull up on Cage. His location showed he was at home, and since I hadn’t heard from him, I assumed he was asleep. Little did he know, he was in for a rude awakening.

I stormed toward the garage on a mission to get shit straight.

The doorbell ringing stopped me in my tracks.

My lips formed an ‘O’, heavily blowing air through them as I rerouted my path.

With force, I swung the front door open to see Taylor and Sienna standing there.

I glanced back and forth between their empathetic gazes, feeling my breathing increase with each passing second.

After a while, I could no longer hold my emotions in.

My shaky hands covered my face, and I bawled.

Taylor and Sienna engulfed me, surrounding me with their love. Their energy calmed me. I needed them now more than ever, and I was beyond grateful to have them by my side.

Once I calmed down, we went to the kitchen where Sienna went straight to the pantry for a snack. It made me snicker. She’d never been big on snacking, so I knew it was all the baby.

“How are you, Sienna?” I inquired.

She waved me off. “Girl, this is not the time to be focusing on me. I’m fine, just worried about you.”

“I’m feeling too many emotions right now. I need to see Cage.”

“Hear me out,” Taylor started, sliding a bottle of water over to me. “I don’t think the pictures are what whoever is trying to make them seem to be. Someone set him up, and I believe Lorie had everything to do with it.”

“I agree.” Sienna chimed in. “We all know how much Cage loves you and despises Lorie. That girl planned that.”

Taylor snapped her fingers. “Exactly. I know it’s hard not to react off emotion, but you need to hear Cage out. Let him explain himself.”

Did I believe Cage and Lorie had something going on?

No. Absolutely not. Not whenever he had free time, it was spent with me.

Still, I felt we needed some time apart to figure things out.

Mentally and emotionally, I was drained with him. I may have been a little dramatic, but it was the truth.

I lowered my head with my mouth twisted. “Y’all are right, but honestly, I feel Cage and I need to put a pause on our relationship.”

Taylor and Sienna simultaneously gasped. Sienna’s hand covered her mouth while Taylor plopped down next to me. She laced her fingers between mine and gave my hand a squeeze.

“As badly as I don’t want that for y’all, you gotta do what you feel is right in your heart. Time apart might be good. It might strengthen what y’all share now. It’s going to hurt like hell, but you know we got you.”

Sienna agreed. “That, we do. There is nothing wrong with taking time when it’s needed. Let’s be real. You and Cage are soulmates. This time won’t affect anything but your hearts for the moment. When y’all get back together, y’all will be stronger than ever.”

Nervously, I waited for Cage to come outside.

He invited me inside, but I refused. I wanted to get the breakup over with so I could leave and wallow in peace.

The longer I stayed around him, the harder it would be for me.

I wanted to stand on business. I didn’t want to change my mind, because I felt time apart was best for us.

My heart dropped to the pit of my stomach when Cage approached me.

He was so handsome with the mug on his face, and I could sense he knew something was off.

When he made it to me, standing directly in front of me, I immediately started crying.

I couldn’t help it. The roller coaster my emotions were taking me on was one I prayed to never experience again.

Cage tried to embrace me, but I pushed him away. He jerked his head back, nose scrunched and eyebrows dipped. “What’s good, KoKo?”

“I can’t do this anymore, Cage. I can’t.”

“Do what?”

“Us. I can’t do us.”

The words tasted like vile vomit, burning my tongue with each syllable. I couldn’t believe we’d gotten to this point. Not only was I parting with my lover, but also my best friend.

He wet his lips and placed his hands on top of his hooded head. Cage took a step back and muttered, voice cracking, “Don’t do this, Korren.”

I dropped my head to avoid his stare. The chilly wind stirred our emotions around us. It was wild how connected we were. Cage’s heart was breaking, and I could feel every rip I caused. It mimicked how I felt anytime he choose the streets over me.

“You think I want to do this? I don’t, but what’s happening between us isn’t healthy right now.”

“And how do we make it healthy? You know how fucked up I am when it comes to you. You know if you truly want to do this shit, I’m not making it.”

His words cut deep. His tongue was a knife with rigged edges, slowly slicing through my skin. I imagined mine were the same for him. Finally, I raised my head to look at him. I shouldn’t have. His brown cheeks were wet as he glared at me, eyes darkening with each blink.

Barely above a whisper, I expressed, “It’s not forever. It’s only temporary.”

“If it’s only temporary, then why are you doing it?”

“Because what my dad said that day was right, Cage. You need time to figure things out for yourself. I know you’re not intentionally hurting me by dragging me along, but this shit hurts. How many times must I tell you before you make a change?”

“Making the change isn’t as easy as you think it is. There’s a lot behind the scenes you don’t know about. A lot you don’t see. I keep you protected from it because if you knew . . .” He ran his tongue over his top row of teeth and thumbed his nose. “You’re not being patient with me anymore, huh?”

“Patience can run thin.”

Cage walked up on me, standing in between my legs.

I could hear how hard his heart thumped in his chest. The warmth coming from his body wasn’t because of the sweatsuit he wore.

I slid my hand up his torso, stopping to feel his heart.

He closed his eyes, and more tears poured from them.

We were both weak, but I prayed what Taylor said was true: The situation at hand would only make us stronger.

Eyes open, Cage gazed into mine and asked, “You really want to do this, huh?”

“Want? No. Need? Yes.”

Slowly, he bobbed his head before softly pressing his lips against mine. The saltiness from his tears lingered on my mouth when he pulled away and cupped my face.

“I love the fuck out of you, Korren. This shit is killing me, but you’re right. It’s not fair of me to drag you along while I figure shit out. You do know this changes nothing, right?”

“What do you mean?”

“This break doesn’t change the fact you’re mine, and I’m yours.

This break doesn’t change the fact I’ll lose my mind behind you.

This break doesn’t change the fact we’re together.

You can call it a breakup or whatever you want, but it doesn’t apply to me.

All I’m doing is respecting the fact you need space and time to think while I get my shit together.

You’re opening my eyes to some things I’ve been too blind to see and too scared to step on, but you better believe I’m not going anywhere. ”

I’d always known Cage was a little on the crazy side, but the kiss he placed on my forehead before he walked away sent a chill down my spine.

With each step he took, a piece of me went with him.

Deep down, I knew our breakup wasn’t final, but it didn’t stop the agony residing in the place he was supposed to be.