Page 12 of Fixate (Devious Mafia Daddies #2)

Pharrell

I watched Ricardo sleep for far longer than I should have. It was fucking impossible to look away though.

This man, who I’d honestly believed indifferent to me, was in my lap, hugging my thigh and suckling my cock. What wonderful sort of hell had I fallen into?

The timing of all this is bad. And I had a feeling Ricardo wasn’t going to offer me another chance with him if things didn’t work out now.

What we’d done earlier felt so natural. I knew it was his first time with a man, yet it almost didn’t feel like it. Sure, his exploring and tentative licks made it obvious in some ways. But in others, he was so fully immersed in everything, I would have thought otherwise.

To top it all off, he didn’t want to let go of me. I’d seen the hesitant look in his eyes. I’d felt the way his body had gone taut as he went to answer me but couldn’t. Others would have thought he was coming out of a lusty haze and having regrets.

But I knew better.

His gaze was that of wonder and hope. He wanted to keep going. Answering me meant he couldn’t.

So, I’d given him an out. I’d told him he could keep my cock in his mouth while we napped. He’d passed out damn near right away.

I couldn’t though. Not when the man I’d had far too many fantasies about was here with me. Not when I needed to take in every piece of him, to commit it all to memory, so I’d have it after he left.

Because I had no doubt he would leave.

Whether it be after his nap when he sent me to my own room or later when he left after deciding I had myself put back together enough to lead. He was not someone who was meant to stick around in my life.

No matter how much I’d have liked it, I understood the score.

Eventually, I did pass out, one hand behind my head and the other gently resting against Ricardo’s head. It was a move to soothe, as well as to let me know when he decided to pull away from me.

I didn’t feel him trying to escape though. There was no indication he’d left at all when I awoke. In fact, he was still asleep as ever, though his mouth had continued to suckle my cock.

As expected, I was hardening again. I wondered how long it was going to take him to realize what he’d done. Part of me knew better than to expect him to want to give me head again. If anything, he’d wake up and run for the hills at what he’d done.

I knew how straight men were. Some could experiment fine, though they’d never claim to be bi or gay. It was just a ‘thing guys did’ they’d say to justify it to themselves.

Others would experiment once and only once, usually because they’d freak out the second they came to. I feared Ricardo would be in the latter group.

I waited for him to wake up as I willed my body to cool off. It was fucking impossible with how gorgeous he looked, lips wide and puffy, as they wrapped around my tip. He wasn’t even that far down anymore, yet I felt like he’d worked me over and deep throated me with how greatly I was affected.

His eyes slowly opened half an hour after I woke up. He blinked slowly, then froze. I watched as he became aware of what position he was still in.

Surprisingly, he didn’t immediately jump into action. Instead, he swirled his tongue around the crown of my cock experimentally. Almost like he was checking to see if this was still real.

I blew out a deep breath, which caught his attention. “Hello, mon chou. Did you sleep well?”

In an unhurried way, he pulled his mouth away from my now fully erect cock. He kept his head on my thigh as he worked his (probably stiff) jaw.

“It was really good. I haven’t slept like that in ages.” He threw a small grin my way. It was very shy compared to the man I normally interacted with.

“I’m glad. I rested well too. Do you have any questions for me? I’m happy to answer if your curiosity isn’t sated.”

Was it dumb to bring up the obvious? Probably so. I could have pretended nothing was amiss and we’d avoid the topic of what happened between us forever.

Except that wasn’t what I wanted.

Even if Ricardo didn’t want to be with me, I needed to ensure he didn’t feel guilt or shame for our time together.

He needed to know there was nothing wrong with wanting another man.

Our line of work was full of homophobic bastards spouting off at the mouth to cover their own issues.

If he’d heard half the shit I had, he was likely waging a war with himself internally over what was right and what we’d done.

Instead of answering me, his gaze went back to my cock. He stared at it with hunger.

“Tell me what you want, mon chou,” I rasped, too overpowered by the look he wore to mask my own feelings.

He rose from his position on my leg. I wanted to cry out at the separation. Instead, I waited. He knew what he wanted. Or at least, he had some idea. I needed to be able to reassure him that it was ok.

I’d take care of him. Just the way a Daddy would.

Fuck. No.

I had to push those feelings away. Getting to have him this way was one thing. Adding a kink dynamic to it was far too hopeful wishing.

As I watched, Ricardo pushed my legs a little closer, then straddled them. He’d lost his boxers at some point during our nap it seemed, which left him bare against me.

“I want…” he started. “I want more.”

My nod was immediate. Whatever he wanted, he’d have. I was his to conquer, his to control.

Funny how I was usually the one in charge, the one who kept their cool. But a single day with him, and I’m willing to risk it all for anything he’d give.

“Do you want my help again?”

“Well, duh. I don’t really know what I’m doing here.”

My hand slapped his ass before I had a second to think it through. The sound echoed around the room, freezing us both in our tracks.

“You might be bratty in some ways, but when I ask you a question, you need to answer respectfully. Understand me?” I wasn’t sorry for what I’d done. Not if the way his cock jolted and began to leak against me was any indication of how much he enjoyed what I’d done.

He bit his lip and nodded.

“I need words, mon chou. Tell Da — tell me you understand.”

Ricardo took a deep breath in, closing his eyes like he was trying to get his balance. Same, baby. Same.

“I promise I understand. Now can we please do something? I need more. It’s hard.” He grinned, letting me know that turn of phrase was intentional.

Sharing a tender moment with him felt natural. It felt like we’d always been meant to do this. That I wasn’t supposed to be in a forced marriage arrangement to a backstabbing woman, and he didn’t live across the country babysitting my ally.

I wrapped my hand around his length, eager to see how he’d react to my touch. His eyes widened slightly, but otherwise, he didn’t appear to be overthinking. He wanted to get off. Wanted to feel good.

And he knew I could do it.

“I’m going to wrap my hand around us both, mon chou. And you’re going to fuck yourself into my fist. It’s going to feel amazing when you glide against me. Trust me.”

Trust Daddy.

God, I wasn’t even there with him, yet it felt so right. I wanted to say the word aloud. Wanted to hear him say it back. It was becoming a need as great as the ache in my balls.

Shutting down that side of my brain, I focused on us. I spit on my hand, then did as I said I would. My grip was firm enough to have him jolt. I didn’t lessen it though. Not when I wanted to be sure he felt every inch of me as he chased his release.

He must have been worked up already because it took no time at all for his hips to lose their rhythm. “Going to come,” he bit out as he fell forward to hover over me.

Not wanting to lose my own high, I began to stroke up to pick up the slack where he’d lost course. He groaned deep when he came. His cock twitched against mine. It only added to the roar of need in my veins.

He’d only just finished his release when mine tore free. “Mon chou,” I whispered, my body and mind on another level of euphoria.

It was intoxicating.

It was overwhelming.

I didn’t know what the fuck was happening.

“I’m here.”

His words reassured me, but it was like I couldn’t focus. I couldn’t get a hold of myself as I came and came and came. There was no end to it.

“I’m here, Daddy. I’m here.”

It was that single word that pulled me from the haze. Ricardo’s mouth was open, as if he wanted to say more but couldn’t.

There was worry in his expression. And maybe a bit of fear. Definitely some confusion.

Knowing it wasn’t the time for a long talk, I pulled him into my chest. There was a mess between us, but I didn’t fucking care. He needed me. I needed him. We could shower later.

I rubbed his back to soothe the tension from his muscles. “It’s ok, mon chou. You did nothing wrong. You were… perfect.”

He shivered in my hold, though he didn’t say a word. How in the world was I going to convince him this was ok? That what he’d said wasn’t weird or anything.

I’d find a way. I always did.

Ricardo and I were going to get to the bottom of this connection we had. I might not have asked him to come, but he was here now, and he wasn’t leaving my sight.