Page 10 of Fixate (Devious Mafia Daddies #2)

Pharrell

This motherfucker was laughing at me.

Me.

Pharrell Lyon.

As if he didn’t know how deadly I could be when provoked. He’d stood by my side as we slaughtered Domenico’s men. I was ruthless to no end.

And yet he was smiling and laughing.

That sexy mouth of his was curved, a teasing edge to it. His eyes practically sparkled with challenge. I wanted to fuck the sass right out of him.

He had no clue how much he tempted me. Had no clue about the torment that came from being close to him. I’d hidden it far too well over the years.

Ricardo was my kryptonite.

I wanted to bend him to my will, make him see what good that mouth of his could do when wrapped around my cock. I ached to bend him over, spread his cheeks and delve my tongue into his body.

“Why didn’t you answer me?”

His voice pulled me from the daydream. I was still pressed against him, his back to the wall. We were touching more than we ever had before, my anger having stolen my rational thought.

I pulled back immediately. My cock was straining to be let free, to chase after what I wanted. If he’d been paying attention, I’m sure Ricardo likely felt what effect he had on me. His face didn’t show any change though, so I had to guess he was still clueless.

“There have been things I needed to handle. Replying to you wasn’t a priority,” I answered harshly.

Distance.

I needed to put distance between us.

Turning, I took off to the dining room. I’d been eating when he arrived. Or rather, trying to eat. It was a chore these days given how my mind wandered to all the issues at hand.

Stasia’s uncle had basically declared war on my people. He wasn’t killing us outright yet, though the tensions were high, and several shipments have been intercepted. Money was the backbone of this business. If it weren’t for the casinos filtering funds into the illegal activities, we’d be fucked.

As it stood, the process should have been going in the opposite direction. The plan was always to use the legit businesses to funnel cash from the illegal ones. It should have been a seamless process.

With the Bratva breathing down my neck, it had become a chore.

On top of all that, I was still unsure about the men surrounding me. Henri, Pip, and Jean were the only ones I knew who would have my back completely. Since Jean had taken on a side project for me recently, I only had two to trust.

It would be several weeks before Jean came back. The work I needed him to do required a deep focus, and he had to be cut off from all things related to La Famiglia in order to immerse himself in the tasks ahead.

Ricardo scoffed. “I should have been a priority. Whatever is happening here, I can help. You didn’t have to do this alone.”

Alone.

Such a simple word, yet so powerful. I loved and hated it in equal measure.

“Dante needs you.” My words didn’t sound as confident as they had before.

“No, he doesn’t. He has Preacher now. They’ve got everything under control. Besides, I just quit, and he wished me well.”

“You quit?!”

That was… interesting news. Why in the world would he quit his role after all these years? Part of me knew the reason immediately. It was the same word he’d just used.

Ricardo was alone. Not physically. Neither of us went without someone around us pretty much at all times.

He was alone in the same way I was. The kind where you didn’t have a reliable partner or lover.

Where the people you depended on were part of your payroll rather than being a friend.

It made all the difference when you couldn’t look to someone for help.

Doing things alone was a powerful feeling, yes, but the empty moment after accomplishing something and having no one to celebrate with was horrible.

“I did quit, yeah. It wasn’t for me anymore. I knew it was time to move on. Figured I could come out here to help you. Now you’re stuck with me.” His grin had my hands balling into fists so I wouldn’t accidentally punch him. Or worse, grab his face and kiss him with everything I had.

This crush of mine, this longing, was fine when he was halfway across the country. It was fine when he wasn’t this close. A fantasy wasn’t dangerous because it wasn’t real.

The man in front of me was very, very real.

“You’re an idiot for leaving. There’s nothing for you to do here. I’ve got it under control.”

A lie. I did not have anything under control.

I needed his help. There was no way to get out of the shit I’d fallen under without having someone to help take on the burdens with me.

And while I could have asked any of the three men I trusted to do so, it felt wrong to take them away from what they excelled at to throw them in the fire Stasia left behind.

My men needed to stay where they were. Each of them kept the rest of the men in line while I tried to put out the main blaze that had become my life.

Ricardo stepped into my space again, his gaze challenging.

“I might be an idiot at that, but I’m fucking smart in other ways.

Smart, as in I can see you haven’t been eating properly or sleeping well.

Smart, as in I knew Stasia’s family would be a bigger issue than anyone thought and that you need a new peace agreement with them before things go bloody.

Smart, as in I’m exactly what you need whether you want to admit it or not. ”

“Fuck!” I bellowed as I turned from him to catch my breath.

He was right. And far too intuitive for his own good.

The sound of my heavy breathing echoed around the room. Ricardo was a good fit to help me with the business. It was just this fucking obsession I had with him that would be problematic.

Stasia and I had always been friends and partners. She held her own, and I was never one to be jealous or emotional when it came to our relationship.

But I already knew I wouldn’t be able to hold back with Ricardo — though we didn’t even have a relationship to speak of.

If one of my men, or anyone else really, decided to test him, I’d likely put a bullet through their skull without thought.

I wouldn’t stand for him being disrespected or questioned like the men sometimes were with new people.

Worse, I had no clue how the men would handle me openly showing affection to another man. They all knew I was gay. I’d never hidden the fact. But out of respect for Stasia, I’d never flaunted any hookups or short-lived relationships. They’d never even seen me hold hands with another man.

I knew if Ricardo stuck around, that could possibly change. Even if he didn’t want anything to do with me, it wouldn’t take long for the men who’d been with me the longest to notice my obsession.

“Fine,” I said once I’d run through all the worst what-if scenarios in my head. I turned to face him once more. “You can stay. I’ll have a room made up for you and we’ll go over business stuff after you’ve rested.”

He shook his head. “Slept on the plane. I’m good to go. Though you might need a nap.”

The way his gaze raked over my face made me want to squirm. I held steady because he wouldn’t get to see the cracks in my armor this early.

I knew what he saw anyway. The bags under my eyes. The way my skin had become sickly pale. My clothes, which were now a size too big on my slender frame.

It was rather obvious how much I’d been struggling.

“I don’t have time for a nap,” I told him.

“What makes you think I’d have time for one then? You need sleep more than I do.”

I growled in frustration. “Are you always this fucking stubborn?”

“Yep. It’s one of my best features.”

Wrong.

His best feature was his undoubtedly his ass. Or maybe his hands.

Damn, I loved those hands. Had dreamed of them wrapped around my cock, clawing at my back, and sifting through my hair while I sucked around his length.

I’d had my fair share of filthy thoughts about this man. He knew not one of them.

Sighing, I thought of a solution to get this over with. The food was long cold, which was fine given I had little appetite. We had to find a solution to my lack of sleep and Ricardo’s petulance.

“What about this? We can both take a short nap. When we wake up, we can eat and go over business.”

Ricardo scrunched his face. “I’m guessing there’s no set time for stuff here. You know, cause the city never sleeps.”

I laughed at the silly phrase. “You’re right. We function at whatever time we’re awake. Whether the sun is up or not there is business to be handled. I could give you a tour of everything after you’ve rested. Maybe introduce you to the most important men beneath me.”

“That sounds good. I guess this means we’re going to nap, huh?”

Nodding, I turned us to the stairs. “Grab your bags and follow me.”

—-----

He followed me as I led him directly to his room. It was two doors down from mine. Far enough to give me room, yet close enough to get to him if there was an issue.

“This is where you’ll stay.”

Ricardo looked around the room, his gaze taking in every square inch and detail of the space. I wondered what he thought of the generic space. It had been designed as a simple guest room for family and friends to use, not that they ever really did.

Now it felt a bit inadequate for the man before me.

I wanted to offer him the finer things in life. He’d look amazing in fine clothing, with fabrics bright enough to contrast with his tanned skin. I pictured him relaxing on a beach somewhere, nothing but a small bit of fabric over his most private areas keeping him decent.

“It’ll do. I’ve been in worse,” he eventually said. The words pulled me from the wandering thoughts.

I hummed to cover the growl that built in my throat. Though he didn’t say so, I knew what he meant wasn’t simply that he didn’t have the softest sheets on his bed. He meant he’d been living in squalor at some point.

There was no way to erase that part of his past, yet I found myself wanting to. I wanted to take away every bad memory, every tough part of his life.

At the same time, I couldn’t even imagine the version of him that might exist if he hadn’t had to go through all that. We’d have likely never met.

My life was always destined to be this. I had no other choice, no options outside of this.

“I’ll leave you to your nap. An hour sound fine?”

He’d moved to stand by the bed. At my words, he froze.

“You aren’t leaving,” he said with finality in his tone. “We’re napping together. I don’t trust you to let me sleep, then go off to work on something.”

“Are you serious? Even if I humored your suggestion and stayed in here, I could simply leave once you were asleep. There is nothing to keep me honest if that’s your goal.”

Ricardo frowned as if the thought hadn’t occurred to him. No, I imagine it hadn’t. For a man so ingrained in the mafia life, he didn’t lie about anything. If I were to guess, then I’d say he was honest to a fault.

Perhaps his lies were only for certain things. Maybe I hadn’t been involved in anything yet where he needed to keep the truth from me.

As I pondered this idea, he moved around the bed in my direction. He moved with sure steps, not at all like he was afraid of me or what I could do.

“We are going to bed together. You’re going to stay the whole time or when I wake up I’ll make an effort to fuck up whatever you’re working on. It’s not in my nature to disrupt, but I will fucking do it if you don’t get on that goddamn bed and sleep with me.”

I grinned at the way he became petulant when he didn’t get his way. The bratty behavior matched the sass he’d given me when he arrived.

“You want me to sleep with you? Fine, I will. But there’s something you should know.” I began unbuttoning my shirt slowly. His eyes went to the movement.

“What do I need to know?” he rasped.

I slipped the shirt off, then unbuckled my belt. I loosened it and dropped my pants along with my underwear.

“You should know I sleep naked.”