Page 34 of Falling for the Playboy Pilot

JANNA

I flipped the page of the Cosmo magazine.

I wasn’t even paying attention to the words.

I was only doing what I could to avoid looking at my phone.

To avoid picking it up and texting Dalton.

His stupid invitation to get together pissed me off.

Was he planning to fuck Tanya at three and then me at seven?

Fuck that.

The man couldn’t seem to figure his shit out. Hot and cold. Games. I was not interested in being a yo-yo. If he wanted to mess around, he was more than welcome to do so. I just didn’t have to be one of the mares in his stable.

Let him talk to all the Tanyas in the world.

He wasn’t mine, and I wasn’t his. If he wanted to hook up with every pretty face he met, fine.

But it was ridiculous that he had the nerve to get jealous when I talked to two firefighters yesterday.

He had actually tried to fight them. I wasn’t tracking down his many women and trying to pull their hair or kick their asses.

And the balls on him, to have a date with Tanya in the afternoon and try to hook up with me later. Was he planning to kiss me with the taste of Tanya still on his lips. The bastard. Pig. Jerk.

After I spent the night in his bed, I thought there might have been something. I didn’t know what and I wasn’t going to ask him to put a label on what we were or weren’t. I didn’t want to be a total girl and freak him out.

And that stupid text, all cool and casual, made me crazy.

I knew I should be in the simulator or maintenance or anything that would be useful.

Instead, I was holed up in my room and allowing myself to sit in a pot of jealous stew.

A bubbling stew that was ready to boil over.

Like a volcano. I was two seconds from exploding and not in a good way.

All my lava was going to be directed at one tall, dark, and handsome asshole.

I felt so stupid for falling for the bullshit. I let him act like a caveman and then slept in his bed. I gave him what he wanted.

Except sex.

Why did he want me in his bed if not to fuck me?

That was odd. It had been anything but physical.

I groaned and threw the magazine. It was almost two o’clock. I didn’t know where Dalton was right now, but I knew where he was going to be. And dammit, I couldn’t stop myself. I had to know. I was a glutton for punishment.

Maybe I’d storm in on his little tryst and start throwing punches. See how he liked it.

I jogged downstairs and headed out to find Cheryl. She was reading a book in the living room area.

“Hey.” She smiled when she saw me. “I thought you might hide out and pout all day.”

I slumped down on the couch beside her, pulling my knees up to my chest. “I’m not pouting.”

“Right.” She closed her book and turned to face me, one eyebrow raised. “So what happened last night? You never came back to the dorms.”

Heat crept up my neck. “Nothing happened.”

“Nothing?” Her voice pitched higher. “You disappear after Dalton practically started a brawl over you, and nothing happened?”

I fidgeted with the hem of my shirt. “We just talked. Sort of. And then we went to sleep.”

Cheryl stared at me like I’d grown a second head. “Sleep? As in actual sleep?”

“Yes, actual sleep.” I could feel my face burning now. “We didn’t have sex, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“But you spent the night in his bed?”

“Yes.”

“And he didn’t try anything?”

“No.” I buried my face in my knees. “He just held me. We spooned.”

The silence stretched so long I finally peeked up at her. Cheryl was gaping at me like I’d just told her aliens had landed on the airfield.

“Dalton Lucas?” she said slowly. The look of incredulity would have been funny if I wasn’t in such a shitty mood.

“Yes. Dalton.”

“The man who goes through women like tissue paper, held you all night and didn’t try to get in your pants?”

“That’s what I said.”

“Holy shit.” She leaned back against the cushions with a huge grin on her face. “This is far more serious than I thought.”

“Trust me, it’s not.”

“What do you mean?”

I took a deep breath. “Because he got a text from another woman and he will be meeting her today. He was still asleep when it came through. I saw it and bailed.”

Cheryl’s expression shifted from confusion to understanding, then to something that looked like pity. “Oh.”

The single word carried all the weight of disappointment I felt crushing my chest.

“Yeah. Oh.” I tucked the phone away, hating how pathetic I sounded. “So you see? Whatever I thought happened last night was just me being stupid. He’s got his afternoon planned with someone else, and then he thinks he can just text me for tonight like I’m some backup pussy.”

Cheryl was quiet for a moment, chewing on her bottom lip. “Did you ask him about it?”

“Ask him what? ‘Hey, are you planning to sleep with another woman before you see me?’ I think that text speaks for itself.”

“But maybe?—”

“Maybe what?” I snapped, then immediately felt bad for taking my frustration out on her. “Look, I get it. I’m not his girlfriend. We’re not exclusive. Hell, we’re not even really anything. But after last night I thought maybe there was something there. Something real. But apparently I was wrong.”

Cheryl reached over and squeezed my hand. “You’re not wrong to feel hurt. Even if you’re not official, spending the night like that? It means something.”

“Does it, though?” I pulled my hand away and stood up, pacing to the window. “Maybe that’s just how he operates. Maybe he cuddles with all his hookups.”

“Janna, come on. You know that’s not true. Herc is a lot of things but he’s not a cuddler.”

I turned back to her, crossing my arms. “How well do I really know him? We’ve hooked up a couple times, but what do I actually know about Dalton Lucas besides the fact that he’s a good pilot and looks incredible with his shirt off?”

“You know he’s haunted by something. You know he has walls up for a reason. You know he fought for you yesterday.”

“He fought because his ego was bruised, not because he cares about me. He could have just peed on me if he wanted to mark his territory.”

She burst into laughter. “Gross.”

“That’s basically what he did. He doesn’t want me but no one else is supposed to touch me.

That’s so high school. It’s stupid. It’s not like I asked for a proposal.

He’s being dumb. And weird. I know I’m young, but he’s the one acting like a child.

He needs to grow the hell up. He’s off fucking a harem and I’m sitting here twiddling my thumbs. ”

Cheryl shook her head. “I don’t think that’s true, but even if it is, there’s only one way to find out.”

I glanced at the clock on the wall. Two fifteen. “I can’t just show up and spy on him.”

“Why not? If he’s just hooking up with some random woman, then you’ll know where you stand. And if it’s something else?” She shrugged. “Then maybe you’ll stop torturing yourself and take Tyler up on whatever he was offering yesterday.”

I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, that would be bad. Really bad. I don’t want to be the Reddington doorknob.”

She frowned. “What?”

“Everyone gets a turn.”

She burst into laughter again. “I don’t think that’s what anyone would think.”

I shook my head. “I can’t. I didn’t even want to get together with Dalton but dammit, he’s hard to resist. How did you manage?”

“Because he’s like a brother and that would be really gross. But I’m not the one to give advice about doorknobs. Hello, Wild Bill. And now I’ve got the Pickle situation.”

“That’s different,” I said.

“How?”

“Because you were in a long-term relationship with Wild Bill and Pickle is a good guy.”

“So is Dalton.”

I snorted. “Yeah, that remains to be seen.”

“Take my car. Stalk the man. I will totally back up the stalking in this situation.”

“I can’t.”

“The hell you can’t.”

“I don’t want to stoop to his level,” I said.

She rolled her eyes. “I’m not telling you to go in there and act crazy. You have to keep the crazy on the down low for now, but that doesn’t mean you can’t scope out the competition.”

“It’s not competition because I don’t care.”

“You are a terrible liar.”

I frowned because it was all true. “And then what? I see him with another woman. What do I do?”

“You confirm what you suspect,” she said. “Or you disprove it.”

“Does he have a sister in town?” I asked hopefully.

She grimaced and shook her head. “No.”

“Mom?”

“No.”

“Shit. Fucking asshole.”

“Could be a friend,” she suggested.

“If you believed that you wouldn’t be encouraging me to stalk him.”

“I’m saying you need to see it with your own eyes or you’re going to torture yourself with maybe it wasn’t what I thought it was nonsense. See it. Believe it. Move on. That’s all you can do.”

I hated that she was right. “Fine. Thank you for letting me borrow your car. I’ll fill it up.”

“Good luck. I’ve got bail money but not enough to cover a murder charge. And I don’t know you well enough to help you hide a body.”

“I’m perfectly capable of digging a hole,” I said and took the offered keys.

I drove into town and couldn’t help but notice Dalton’s truck was not in the parking lot when I left.

There was a feeling of dread and irritation in my gut.

Cheryl was right and I knew I had to see it with my own two eyes or I was going to keep holding out hope.

I would torture myself with the many possible excuses he could offer up.

And worse, I would be prone to believe his bullshit because I wanted him. I couldn’t let myself get lied to.

I spotted his truck parked out front of Martha’s. The feeling in my gut intensified. My hands were shaking. I pulled the car to a stop and shut off the engine. I was pretty sure I wasn’t obvious. He wouldn’t be looking for me. I felt adrenaline flood my system. I’d never spied on anyone before.

I spotted Dalton strolling down the sidewalk carrying flowers and a brown paper bag. The jealousy that coursed through me was almost enough to unlock the crazy I was barely keeping under control. He walked in, and through the windows, I could see him moving through the diner.

That was when I saw her: a pretty brunette in an olive-green blouse. She stood to greet him with a smile and a hug. She was pretty. I was expecting someone dressed in leopard print with big tits and bigger hair. The woman was definitely not that. She looked like a schoolteacher or a bank teller.

He looked at her the way I wanted him to look at me, then reached for her hand before pulling it back. It twisted the knife harder.

He pulled a bottle of liquor from the bag and set it on the table next to the flowers. I thought that was odd, but whatever. I watched as they sipped cold drinks and talked.

And then without ordering food, they got up and walked out together. She walked to a silver Camry with the flowers and bottle of booze. Dalton walked back to his truck and then he followed her.

“Cocksucker!” I quickly started the car and jumped in line behind them.

I expected her to lead him to a sleazy motel.

His cabin was in the other direction, so I knew they weren’t going there.

I watched as the little convoy pulled through the gates of a cemetery.

I stayed back because there was nowhere to hide Cheryl’s car.

“What the hell?” I murmured.

Graveyard sex?

And like a pervert, I parked outside the cemetery and crept up, hiding in the trees, and watched them. They parked and got out of their vehicles.

Dalton walked across the grass with her beside him. I watched as the woman knelt in front of a headstone and placed the flowers in the little holder. Dalton placed the bottle against the headstone.

Oh fuck. Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck. This wasn’t what I thought it was at all. This was something private. Something sad and sacred. And I was lurking in the bushes like some kind of serial killer. I needed to get out of there.

I started backing away slowly, trying to stay low behind the trees.

My heart was hammering so hard I was sure they could hear it from fifty yards away.

The woman was still kneeling by the headstone, and Dalton was standing beside her with his head bowed.

I couldn’t make out what they were saying, but whatever it was, it was none of my damn business.

I turned to creep back toward the car and debated sprinting.

“Janna?”

Shit. Shit, shit, shit.

I straightened up slowly, my face burning with embarrassment. Dalton was walking toward me, his hands on his hips, staring directly at me. Even from this distance, I could see the hard set of his jaw and the way his shoulders had gone rigid.

He did not look happy to see me.

The woman looked up from the headstone, confusion written across her face as she glanced between Dalton and me. I wanted to disappear into the ground. I wanted to spontaneously combust. I wanted to be anywhere but where I stood.