Page 38 of Explorer’s Revenge

THIRTY-FIVE

LOGAN

W e managed to set up windbreakers to protect us from the harsh gusts.

The rain has stopped, but who knows for how long.

We started a fire and got our bed rolls out, wrapping them around her after Wilder treated her head wound.

He said the cut is deep, and she might even have a concussion.

He looks concerned, especially when she doesn’t wake up when he prods the wound.

He also inspects her leg and gives her a shot of something, but from the tightening around his eyes, it’s clear he’s very worried.

Wrapping my hands around the steel mug, I blow on the water, watching her through the steam.

“When was the first time you met Maeve?” I ask curiously.

“Mine was at the Red Bull awards. You guys didn’t want to go to the after-party, but I went anyway, and she was there, surrounded by people.

Her laugh was so loud, it caught my attention, and she looked happy.

I had no idea who she was at the time. The next day, I noticed she’d signed with Ajax, and, well, the rest is history. ”

“Mine was online. Does that count?” Rick asks. “I was scrolling on our night flight back from Peru and found her channel. I watched her for hours. The first video was her jumping from a hot-air balloon and doing backflips. She looked like she had no cares in the world.”

“Or was batshit insane,” Wilder scoffs.

“The first time I met her was at Venture with Wilder, when Ajax tried to convince us to let her join our team. She’d just met with him, and she stomped out.

She was glaring at Wilder, and they argued.

She didn’t even notice me”—Way smiles—“but she made an impression, considering the way she went toe-to-toe with Wilder.”

“Mine was at Venture too.” Aiyaret moves closer to Way as he looks at her. “The one I told you about. I heard about her from you guys and saw her online, but it was my first time meeting her. She wasn’t loud or angry. She was . . . kind.”

“It’s like she knows what each of us needs,” I say then look at Wild. “When did you meet her?”

For a moment, I don’t think he’ll answer, but then he speaks. “The one she will remember is at Venture when we argued.”

“What do you remember? Why would it be different from what Maeve recollects?” I frown, unsure what he means.

“I met her years before that.” My eyes widen. He never mentioned knowing her before Venture. “I didn’t know her name back then. We were strangers. It was only years later, when I met her at Venture, that I learned it.”

“What? When? How did you meet?” Rick asks as he shuffles closer, propping his chin on his hands.

Wilder sighs, looking at Maeve. “It was brief. Do you remember when we went skiing and there was that avalanche, and I was trapped in a cabin for a few days with all those strangers who had been in the restaurant?”

I nod, and he looks from her to the fire.

“She was there. She’d just come in from the slopes.

Her face was red, and she was covered in snow.

When it happened, she stayed calm and helped people who were scared.

She made them laugh and lightened everyone’s mood.

I kept to myself after helping out, so I thought she didn’t notice me, but that night, she came over, sat by my side, and told me it would be okay.

I got so mad and told her I wasn’t scared and to leave me alone.

She said, ‘Hey, it’s okay to be scared. I am, but you have to have hope too.

’ I was scared because you guys were out on the slopes, and I didn’t know what had happened to you, but I wouldn’t admit it.

I was prickly and rude, yet she stayed at my side all night.

We didn’t really talk, just sat side by side.

It was the longest night of my life. I was terrified for you, but somehow, she lessened my fear, and when we were rescued the next day, she just left, and you guys were safe and sound. ”

“You never talked about what happened there,” I murmur softly. I remember that night. We were so fucking terrified he’d been lost in the snow. It was chaos, and when he walked out of the snowed in main building the next day, I’d never felt so much relief.

“I forgot for a while. She was just a passing stranger, one who’d loaned me a shoulder without complaint. When I met her again, I recalled who she was, but she didn’t recognize me, so I guess it pissed me off,” he admits.

Wilder’s eyes soften as they land on Maeve, and I see something in those depths that surprises me. I think he’s finally stopped fighting his attraction, and his anger has faded, leaving only the truth behind.

He cares for her.

I’ve lived with Rick and Wilder nearly all my life, and I have never seen that tenderness in his eyes. He never lets anyone close enough for him to care about them, always worried about protecting us. Wilder has his reasons, though, just like we all do.

“Do you still hate her?” I ask.

“I don’t think I ever really did,” he divulges, which is something. “She just?—”

“Called you on your shit?” Way laughs, making Wilder crack a smile.

“Yeah, and pushed my buttons. She made me feel things I had no right feeling. I need to be strong and calm to keep our family together. I felt unbalanced when I was with her, and I blamed her for that.”

“It isn’t all on you, brother,” Rick tells him. “It isn’t your job to take responsibility for us. You take too much on yourself . . . always have. You are allowed to feel things, date, and be happy. You are allowed to live for yourself, not just for us.”

His gaze sweeps over us and then moves back to her before he rubs his head. “We’ll see once we’re out of this. Right now, you need me to get you off this island.”

There’s no point in arguing when Wilder has made up his mind, so we slip into silence.

I don’t know what the others are thinking about, but I’m thinking about her.

I wonder if I’ll ever hear her laugh again.

Suddenly, Aiy’s voice jerks me from my thoughts, and I turn to stare at him.

It’s unlike him to talk a lot, but he seems oddly fond of her.

“She doesn’t even hesitate,” he murmurs.

“When there’s danger, she throws herself at it, despite whatever it means for her well-being, to keep us safe.

Her first instinct is to run at it and save us.

We were wrong about her. I was wrong about her.

She was always one of us, and I worry she’ll never wake up for us to tell her that. ”

“She will,” Way promises as he takes Aiy’s hand and kisses his head. “We have to believe that.”

“Maeve Carter would never let something like a head injury win,” Wilder states calmly. “She will wake up, and when she does, we can tell her ourselves.”

He sounds so confident, but I see the truth in his eyes. I don’t say anything, though, knowing Aiy needs comfort.

Wilder moves away, keeping watch, while the others go to settle down for the night, and I set my lukewarm mug to the side and scoot closer to her.

While the others are distracted, I take her cold hand, warming it between mine as I lean in, my words just for her.

“I lost my parents when I was young,” I tell her.

“I can barely remember them now, to be honest. I used to struggle to remember the color of their eyes, their scents, the way they would laugh . . . . It disappears after a while, but I remember loving them, and when they died, they left a hole in my heart that never healed. I distract myself and pretend I’m fine, but deep inside, I’m still that kid in the oversized big black suit, watching his parents’ coffins being lowered into the ground.

So, Maeve, don’t you do that to me again, okay?

I can’t lose anyone else. I can’t attend any more funerals.

” I kiss the back of her hand. “We need you. We need your insanity, and we need you to call Wilder on his shit, sooth Aiy, and play with us, so wake your ass up, Carter. If you do, I promise I won’t let you explore alone anymore.

We’ll be your family who explores with you while your dad can’t. ”

Blowing out a breath, I sit back and make myself comfortable at her side, her hand in mine. I feel eyes on me, but I avoid them, hiding the wetness in my own. I don’t want to upset them anymore or stress them out.

We all have our pain, from Way’s brother to Aiyaret’s past, Wilder’s guilt, and Maeve’s dad. We are all damaged toys.