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Dean

S eptember

“And what are we going to do when Daddy Luke comes out of the tunnel?”

“We scream our heads off to get his attention, and then we turn around!”

“That’s exactly right!”

Ollie sits on my knee, munching on a piece of hot dog bun while Lemmie and Mellie dip pretzel nuggets into nacho cheese in their seats beside me.

It’s the first Redwoods home game of the season here at Twin Peaks stadium, and it’s also Luke’s NFL coaching debut.

The girls and I were invited to watch the game from the owner’s box with James Adler and his family, as well as my sister and the rest of their friends.

But I wanted to be close to the action and close to my husband today, so we’ve got seats right on the fifty-yard line.

Wrangling my daughters by myself in a stadium jam-packed with football fans has been…a journey, to say the least. But it will all be worth it once Luke enters the field with the team.

The past few months have been a whirlwind.

My sister had her baby, adding another little girl, Meadow, to our gaggle of kids.

Luke started working with the team over the summer, and while his days are long and exhausting, he’s always home for dinner and never misses a bedtime story.

And I have totally embraced the stay-at-home dad life, even more so than before.

I ran a summer camp for all the kids we know in the yard back in July, and I’m convinced that in doing so, I’ve helped to raise the next generation of NFL hopefuls.

I’ve had a lot of talks with Lori and Judge Martinez as well, and today, I’ve got news for my husband.

The stadium roars to life as the Redwoods team song, Don’t Stop Believin’ by Journey blasts through the speakers. The team runs out onto the field in a sea of red and gold, and I’m transported back to when I was the one down on the field, getting ready to play the best game known to man .

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss playing professional football, but the life I live now is a thousand times better. I’d choose my husband and my kids over football any fucking day.

The coaching staff filters down the sideline, and true to their word, Lemmie and Mellie start to scream like banshees when they spot Luke in his fitted red t-shirt, red cap and headset.

Goddamn, he’s sexy when he’s all authoritative looking.

“Heya, chickadees!” Luke calls out when he spots us, jogging over and hoisting himself up the half wall and pursing his lips for a kiss. We all oblige—I let the girls go first, giving Luke their pecks before I place a softer, longer kiss to my husband's lips.

“What are you doing down here? I thought you’d be up in the suite,” he says, and I look down at Lemmie and Mellie, giving them a wink.

They turn their backs to Luke, and I put Ollie on my shoulders before doing the same so that Luke can see the backs of all four of our custom Redwoods jerseys.

The jerseys I had made for this occasion read Cannon-McKenna on the back.

I peer over my shoulder to see Luke’s reaction, and he’s standing there looking gobsmacked.

“Dean…are those…does that… ”

“I got the papers back from Lori and Judge Martinez back on Wednesday. I’ve just been waiting to tell you. The adoption was approved.”

I petitioned the court to adopt the girls only a few weeks after Judge Martinez granted Luke custody.

I didn’t want to be half a parent, half a presence in their life.

I wanted our family to feel whole. The bureaucracy crap took forever, and we still have to have a formal hearing, but as far as I’m concerned, Lemmie, Mellie and Ollie are officially my daughters.

But who am I kidding? They already were. I never needed a piece of paper to prove that.

Luke’s hand comes up to cover his mouth.

“Daddy, are you surprised?” Mellie asks, and Luke only nods.

“Daddy Dean gets to be our Daddy forever! And he said we can all change our last names so we match. Are you going to change your last name, too?” Lemmie asks, and I raise a brow.

“Yeah, Luke. You gonna change your last name? You want to be a Cannon-McKenna like the rest of us?”

He swipes a tear from his cheek, then jumps back up onto the wall, sitting on the ledge so that we’re face to face.

He’s probably going to have to pay the NFL a fine for that, but when he reaches out to cup my cheek and pull my face close to his.

“Yeah, baby. I’m changing my name. Dean, Luke, Lemmie, Mellie and Ollie Cannon-McKenna—that sounds pretty fucking good to me.”

And when he presses his lips to mine, even as Lemmie and Mellie groan in faux disgust, I feel whole. Here with my loves, my family, the lights that guide me and carry my home, I’m surrounded by love everywhere I look.