THE EXTENDED GROUP TEXT

New messages from: EXTENDED FAMILY GROUP CHAT .

Mikel: Someone tell Gabriel he’s burning the mulled wine.

Mikel: It smells like arsenic.

Gabriel: I’m trying.

Elijah: Trying to lose.

Moses: Lose at … mulled wine?

Kilian: They’re playing that online word game again, just like last Christmas.

Mikel: Less word games, more monitoring the stove.

Gabriel: This is what happens when you ban us from work for the holidays.

Oscar: The online word game that almost ended in an all-out brawl last year?

Isobel: That’s the one.

Oscar: That was the most thoughtful Christmas present I’ve ever been given.

Oscar: @Lily take over the mulled wine, Gabe needs to focus.

Lily Sato: Uh … I think this needs to be thrown out.

Logan Ashford: I’ll come and help.

Oscar: Stay three feet away from my little sister at all times, playboy.

Logan Ashford: Ew? She’s like my little sister.

Lily Sato: I have a boyfriend.

Bellamy: We all know I’m her favourite big brother.

Hana: @Niko

Niko: Yes, mom?

Hana: @Niko, did you give Illy the blanket I made her?

Niko: You don’t have to tag me in every message, okasan. And you can ask her yourself.

Kilian: This is the family chat, okasan.

Hana: @Kili-chan! How are you my son?

Niko: What, he’s your son now too?

Hana: @Niko, I have twelve sons. @Theodore @Moses @Gabriel @Kilian @Cian @Elijah @Oscar @Mikel @Kalen @Shinji @Tomoya

Bellamy: Wow. So every male in this chat except for me. Woooooow.

Luis Rosales: Um.

Hana: @Bellamy @Luis, my honorary sons.

Braun: @Bellamy, you need to learn to count, boy .

Oscar: Wait.

Oscar: Back fucking track.

Oscar: @Lily you have a what now?

Lily Sato: I have a boyfriend.

Lily Sato: Illy’s known for ages.

Isobel: Nope.

Theodore: Whoa, so many messages. Why did Illy just run outside?

Moses: Are we doing the chasing thing again?

Niko: This is the family group chat.

Moses: Well, if nobody else is gonna chase her …

Niko: This is the family group chat.

Cian: Fuck it, I’m chasing.

Teak: brAUN CARTER

Teak: I TOLD YOU TO JULLIENE THE CARROTS

Teak: NOT ROMEO AND JULIET THEM

Teak: WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THIS MOUNTAIN OF ORANGE MUSH

Theodore: Okay, Braun just ran outside, too, so I don’t think this is the chase thing.

Niko: Still the family group chat.

Kalen: @everyone, get back the fuck inside.

Kilian: @Theodore, you’re not reading a single thing before you send your messages, are you?

Theodore: No, why?

Kilian: No reason.

Sophia: Lunch isn’t going to be on time, is it?

Bellamy: Not a chance .

Sophia: Burgers?

Bellamy: I’ll pull the car around.

Sophia: Thank you, husband.

Isobel: Wait, you guys are leaving?

Sophia: I’m hungry!

Hanale Ashford: We brought snacks!

Cian: Sorry, dad. Already ate them all.

Hanale Ashford: We brought five bags of snacks.

Sao-Yeong Grey: We also brought snacks! I brought rice cakes for my daughter.

Kilian: Yeah, I definitely ate those.

Sao-Yeong Grey: They were for my daughter!

Kilian: What about your son!

Isobel: Tell me you didn’t eat my eomma’s rice cakes.

Kilian: You said I could!

Isobel: Not my SPECIAL rice cakes, I would NEVER.

Kilian: You better run, brat.

Theodore: Oh, there she goes again. Are we back on for the hunt?

Moses: READ THE REST OF THE MESSAGES @Theodore

Theodore: But why, there’s so many.

Mikel: @Sophia @Bellamy, you guys left, right?

Bellamy: In a cloud of dust.

Mikel: We need food.

Kalen: We’ll send you money.

Bellamy: Adam Bellamy saves the day again.

Kalen: And alcohol .

Sophia: On it.

Kalen: And twine.

Niko: This is the family group chat.

Kalen: Teak wanted it. For cooking.

Moses: Oh, well, we know THEY aren’t using it for anything other than cooking.

Elijah: Are we sure?

Gabriel: New bet?

Oscar: Get back to your word game, I haven’t heard shouting yet. No breaks. Not until I get my Christmas present.

Cian: There’s no way Braun is getting laid in that sweater.

Theodore: There goes Cian! The hunt is definitely on, right?

Theodore: I’m just going to go.

Moses: Let him run in the woods. Maybe he’ll get lost. That’s what I want for Christmas.