Page 23 of Don't Speak

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

Seven years ago

Detective Walsh leads me into her office, closing the door behind her.

I sit in the chair opposite hers, resting my elbows on my knees and placing my head in my hands.

This all just feels like one huge nightmare that I’m dying to wake up from, and every time I remind myself that this is reality, the pain cuts even deeper.

“…Mr. Miller?…” Detective Walsh’s voice snaps me back from zoning out.

“I’m sorry. Can you repeat what you were saying?” I ask her.

“Yes. I know this is difficult, but we are opening a case for her suicide. Charlie left a note detailing why she took her life, and it seems as though she was a victim of sexual assault. She named the man in question, and detectives are already on their way to his house.”

“Wh—What?” I choke out. “Did you say… sexual assault? Charlie? My baby sister? Sexually assaulted?” My mind is spinning a million miles an hour, and my emotions are playing hopscotch between rage and despair.

There is too much for me to wrap my head around today.

What does she mean Charlie was sexually assaulted?

Why didn’t Charlie tell me? She could have confided in me, and we would have handled this together.

My stomach roils with disgust, and I grab the small trash can by her desk, emptying what little I had in my stomach into the bag.

“I’m sorry to be the one to tell you. I didn’t want you to find out on the news, and I felt like you should know.

I have the letter if you would like to read it.

She did address it to you.” Detective Walsh slides the letter across her desk, leaving it placed in front of me.

“I’ll give you a moment,” she tells me before getting out of her chair and exiting the room.

I grab the piece of paper, staring at it a bit longer before I wipe the tears from my eyes and slowly unfold it.

Dean,

I want to start this off by saying that I’m sorry.

I know how you must be feeling right now, but I just couldn’t do it anymore.

Six months ago, I met a man online. Mom was on her 5th bender, and I was feeling lonely.

I hate bothering you all the time, so I just figured I could make a friend elsewhere.

We got to talking, and for a while, it was nice.

He helped me through issues with Mom and really listened to how I was feeling.

He made me feel seen, feel heard. I didn’t know that he was a monster in sheep’s clothing.

He lied about his age, telling me he was 17 years old.

He asked me to meet him at the park so we could hang out in person for the first time.

By now, I guess you can figure out which park that was.

Mom was passed out, so I left. It was late, and I should have known better, but Dean, I was so lonely.

You were working, and I just needed someone.

When I got there, I didn’t see anyone yet, so I sat on the swings, waiting.

Before I knew it, someone was grabbing me from behind, wrapping a hand around my mouth, and placing a cloth over my face.

When I woke up, my shorts and underwear were gone, and there was a man…

raping me. When he realized I was awake, he placed his hand back over my mouth.

His whispers haunted me for weeks. “Shhh. Don’t speak,” he said.

When he finished, I felt frozen in place.

I couldn’t move. I couldn’t scream. He told me if I ever told anyone, he’d kill you and Mom.

Dean, I’m so sorry I couldn’t tell you. When he left, I rolled over to put my clothes back on.

When I grabbed them from the mulch, I noticed a wallet on the ground.

It was his. I still have it. You’ll find it in my room in my sock drawer.

His name is Sean Edwards. I can’t live with this Dean.

I feel lost. I feel ashamed. I feel violated.

I feel broken, dirty, and disgusting. Please forgive me.

I’ll always be with you. I love you, big brother.

Charlie

Tears flow down my face as my heart breaks into a million pieces.

For what happened to her, for how she felt like she couldn’t tell me, for how she was violated.

That fucking monster took my sister’s innocence.

Took my sister from ME. My little butterfly.

Rage consumes me, and I squeeze my hand, crushing the note.

When Detective Walsh knocks on the door and asks if I have finished reading, I vow right then and there that there is only one way this ends.

Sean Edwards will fucking die.