Page 19

EIGHTEEN

There’s chaos on the other end of the phone, a multitude of voices and distracting sounds.

“Crystal, are you there?” I say into the phone, trying to get her attention.

“Coach Cass?”

“Yes, I’m here,” I say. Even though she’s the one who called me, her attention seems elsewhere. I can’t imagine what she’s going through. “Are there any updates about Evie?”

“No.” I feel the devastation in her answer. “What happened last night?”

Even though I’ve been trying to get ahold of her since this morning, I’m not prepared to have this conversation. I’ve been dreading it for hours.

“When I last saw Evie, she was asleep alongside the other girls. We woke up in the early hours and did a quick headcount, but she wasn’t there.”

“I don’t understand,” her mother says. “Where could she go?”

“We searched the entire school before the police were even involved. She isn’t there.” I pause. “I kept hoping she’d somehow gotten in touch with you and left.”

“I’ve not seen her since Thursday night,” she says. “I was working. One of the other mothers gave her a ride to the lock-in.”

Crystal knows even less about the situation than I do. She hasn’t seen her daughter in days. Maybe I shouldn’t be surprised by this outcome. I know she isn’t an involved parent, but I’d been hoping for something—anything—that might lead us to where she is.

In the same instant, I realize I can’t be judgmental. Maybe her past behaviors have led me to believe Crystal is an inadequate mother, but she’s not the one who put Evie in danger. I am. She was my responsibility, and she’s gone missing on my watch.

“I’m so sorry about all this. The police are involved now, but I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure Evie is found.”

“You better,” she says, hanging up the phone.

I stare at the screen, utterly helpless. I’ve always vowed to protect my players, especially Evie, and I’ve failed at that job.

“Any news?”

I’d been so distracted by the phone call, I’d almost forgotten about Nadia. She’s standing behind me in the hallway, watching.

“They still don’t know anything.”

“Do you think she ran off? We did it all the time when we were kids.”

“Evie is nothing like we were as kids. Well, that’s not true. She’s from our neighborhood, but she’s a good kid. She doesn’t get in trouble. She’d never run away.”

Again, Nadia’s face changes, her expression darkening. It’s hard to tell whether she’s stuck on a memory from our upbringing, or if she’s thinking about something else.

“What’s a girl like that doing at Manning Academy?”

“She was there on scholarship,” I say. “Her family life is chaotic. Her mother didn’t even see her for a full day before the lock-in, and has no idea where she is now.”

“You think someone came into the school and took her?”

“I don’t know. It’s a possibility.” I cut my eyes at her. “Especially since I left that door open.”

It dawns on Nadia now, all the blame I carry over what happened. Even if she’s being honest and had nothing to do with Evie’s disappearance, a girl went missing on my watch, and my actions could have contributed to that.

“Don’t blame yourself,” she tells me.

“How can I not? I knew better than to open that door.”

“You couldn’t have known something would happen.”

“It’s not just that,” I say, getting to the root of the guilt I’ve been carrying around all day. “I knew something was wrong with Evie. She tried telling me about it twice. Once after the game, and then again at the lock-in. We kept getting interrupted.”

“What do you think it was about?”

“I have no idea,” I say, defeated. “I already knew things were difficult for her. I could have stopped this if I’d kept pushing her, but I was so distracted.”

Nadia goes quiet. She clearly realizes the predicament she’s put me in. That because of her actions and my inability to do my job properly, someone may have gotten into the school. And now a young girl is missing.

“Aren’t there cameras?” she asks.

“The footage is messed up,” I say. “They’ll be able to recover it, but that will take time.”

“Just focus on finding the girl,” she says. “I can help you.”

“How can you do that?”

“I have lots of resources. I’m good at this stuff. Tell me what you know about her and the disappearance, and I’ll do my best to help you.”

“I don’t need your help.”

As I go to turn, I miss my step, shouldering the wall. I struggle to find balance.

“Are you okay?” Nadia asks.

I place a palm on my forehead. I feel clammy.

“I’m fine,” I say. “I’ve just had very little sleep.”

Only a couple of hours, I’m guessing. And every moment since I’ve been awake, I’ve been under an overwhelming amount of stress. My body is struggling to keep up.

“I don’t know if you should drive,” Nadia says. “I can take you?—”

“I’ll be fine,” I say. Even if Nadia wasn’t involved in Evie’s disappearance, it doesn’t mean I trust her. “My house isn’t very far from here.”

That part isn’t exactly true. It’s a twenty-minute drive, but I’m hyper-aware of my surroundings, staying alert.

When I do finally return home, I notice Connor’s car still isn’t in the driveway. I don’t have time to stop and think about where he is. As soon as I make it up the stairs to our bedroom, I’m overcome with sleep.