Page 34 of Dead Serious Case 5 Madame Vivienne

“I know, love, but not today.” I send him a sympathetic smile, then turn my head and notice a rather large bump under Chan’s jacket. “Chan,” I admonish.

He sighs dramatically and pulls out a pair of trousers, a blouse, what looks like a couple of miniskirts, a silk scarf, and a handbag.

“Cupboard?” I ask Danny.

“There.” He points to something I totally missed, and I’m startled to find a tiny door at the bottom of the wall.

“Is this where the Borrowers live?” I ask. “Seriously, it’s maybe a foot tall and a half foot wide, and it’s not a cupboard, it’s a door,” I point out. “For really tiny people, clearly.”

Danny chuckles. “Open it.”

I kneel down on the dusty floor and reach for the tiny door handle. “Fine, but I feel like Alice in Wonderland right now. If I open this and see a white rabbit on the other side, I just want you to know it’s getting bumped up the Everett Scale.”

“The Everett Scale?” Danny’s brow quirks.

“It’s a thing we do now.” Sam shrugs. “Everything is gauged on the Everett Scale.”

“I’m almost afraid to ask.” Danny shakes his head, a smile playing on his lips.

I turn my attention back to the miniature door and open it.

“Huh, why the fuck would someone do that?” I mutter.

Inside the wall on the other side of the door is a complete miniature replica of the room we’re all standing in, right down to the window and fireplace. At least, I think it’s supposed to be this room—minus the clutter. Against the same wall of the mini room that I’m currently kneeling in front of in the real room is a small cupboard, but there’s a keyhole in it that looks like it would fit a real-sized key, not a doll house one.

“Are you sure this is the cupboard Viv meant?”

Danny shrugs. “There’s really only one way to find out,”

I slot the key Viv gave me into the lock. It’s a perfect fit and as I turn it, the mechanism clicks smoothly. Only the small cupboard doesn’t open. The whirring and clicking noises continue all the way up the inside of the wall. I scramble to my feet and step back as a previously invisible seam appears in the wall and a much larger concealed door creaks open.

“A hidden cupboard.” Sam’s eyes widen. “So cool.”

“This house is bloody bonkers,” I whisper. I curl my hand around the part of the wall that has opened up and pull.

A much larger, more organised cupboard is revealed. It’s lined with mahogany panelling and features rows and rows of neat shelves stacked with rolled-up parchments, heavy leather-bound tomes, stacks of letters and paperwork, and a dozen other forms of information. I hear Danny squeak behind me and I almost smile because I know exactly what he’s thinking.

“Surely Viv didn’t mean all of this was mine,” I muse out loud. “I got the feeling she meant she found something very specific she wanted me to have.”

“What about that?” Sam points. “That’s the only thing in there that has a modern Post-It note on it.”

On one of the nearest shelves is a fair-sized rectangular item wrapped in black velvet, just like the ribbon on the key, and stuck to the top of it is a post-it. When I lean in, I inhale sharply.Sam was right; the wordsFor Tristanare written on the yellow paper in Viv’s messy scrawl.

Reaching in, I pick up the parcel. It feels hard, like a book. I set it down on the nearest box while the others gather around me. Folding the sticky note, I tuck it into my pocket before carefully peeling back the velvet. It’s a book, sort of. It’s large and the cover is black leather with the initials CC etched into the bottom right-hand corner.

Opening it up, I flip through the musty, crackling pages and notice where several have been torn out. I know that for a fact because those missing pages are currently sitting in a box in my spare bedroom.

“Is that what I think it is?” Danny’s eyes widen.

“Yes.” I let out a slow breath. “It’s the master copy ofCornelius Crawshanks Guide to the Recently Departed.”

7

Iwake with a yawn and reach out, only to find the other half of the bed empty. A rumbling purr is coming from somewhere near my feet and as I lift my head and blink, I can make out the blurry form of Jacob Marley curled up at the end of the bed and guarding me, like one of the protectors of the dead on an old Egyptian papyrus.

“Death would be pleased that you’re honouring your ancestors.” I chuckle sleepily as Jacob Marley, seeing that I’m now awake, stands and waddles his way up the bed to curl onto my chest.

I wince at the sudden weight. Don’t get me wrong—Jacob Marley only dispenses love and affection on his own timetable so I’ll take it where I can get it, but I’m pretty sure I’m going to have to have strong words with Brandy. If she’s going to cat-sit for me, she needs to stop spoiling him with rich foods or he’s going to end up looking like a furry beach ball with paws.