Page 61 of Dead Serious Case 4 Professor Prometheus Plume

“What on earth are you two doing?” I ask.

“What does it look like?” Bertie says as Roger launches another ball for her. “Deuce!”

“Um, I don’t know much about sports, but I’m pretty sure that isn’t deuce.”

“What are they doing?” Danny whispers.

“Roger is serving tennis balls and Bertie is shooting them with a double-barrelled shotgun,” I reply.

“Why?”

I fist my mittened hands on my hips and stare at Bertie. “That’s what I want to know.”

“What?” Bertie turns to us and shrugs. “Eternity’s really rather dull. After the first three or four decades, things get a bit stale. We had to come up with something to occupy our time. You should have been here for the blindfold Olympics we had last summer. Although I do still feel a little bad about the javelin incident.”

“Oh my god,” I say faintly.

“Oi! You there!” A loud voice rings out.

“Shit,” Roger mutters.

I look across to see a policeman in an old-fashioned bell-shaped helmet and wearing a heavy overcoat.

“Who’s that?” I ask.

“PC Armitage, run over by a tractor in eighty-two.” He turns sharply. “Bertie!”

“Oh, bloody hell! It’s the fuzz!” She picks up her shotgun and, holding her deerstalker on her head with the other hand, takes off running.

“Bertie, wait!” Roger calls. He scurries after her, clutching his tennis racket.

I turn back to see the policeman lift his gloved hand to his mouth and blow a very shrill silver whistle.

“Oi, you! Stop! You don’t have a licence for that firearm!” He takes off running after them and blowing his whistle but as he passes me and Danny, he removes the whistle and nods. “Morning! Lovely weather for a stroll!”

As he passes by, I see the massive tire treads of a tractor marking the back of his coat. Then, as he puts his whistle back between his lips and lets out a thin, reedy note, all three of them disappear.

“This is an utter madhouse,” I whisper.

“I’m almost afraid to ask.” Danny frowns and I turn to him.

“I’m pretty much one hundred percent certain I know why they don’t have many guests and can’t seem to keep staff,” I say. “The spirits here are bored and with no one to keep them in line, they’re running amok.”

“Ah, that would explain a lot.”

“I kind of feel like I should say something to Ellis or someone.” I glance back at the house.

“What are you going to say to him? That you see dead people and his hotel is overrun by a bunch of bored ghosts acting like badly behaved toddlers?”

“You may have a point.”

“It’s not your job to fix everything, love.” He draws me back to him.

“I know.” I sigh and watch as a large white snowflake drifts down and lands on Danny’s cheek. “Oh!” I tip my head back and look up into the sky in delight. “Danny, look!”

The sky is filling with big, thick, white flakes. This isn’t a small dusting dancing on the air like we get down south, this is a proper flurry.

I lift my arms up, crowing in delight like a child as they land on me. Grinning at Danny as I twirl around, I see him watching me with rosy cheeks and an amused smile. The snow is already settling on the ground, and I wonder absently if it’ll get deep enough for me to actually build a snowman, which I’ve never done before in my life.