Page 82 of Darkness Births the Stars #1

For a long, breathless moment, silver and black eyes locked in a relentless struggle, neither of us willing to yield.

Why couldn’t she see that it wasn’t myself I feared for?

That I only wanted to protect her? Because if the shadows of my past consumed her, it would destroy me utterly when nothing else had had the power to do so.

Suddenly, Rada’s harsh expression softened, as if she glimpsed a hint of my thoughts.

She stepped closer, her hand gently closing around my clenched fist, her fingers stroking over my knuckles.

“Remember,” she murmured, so quietly that the others couldn’t hear, “you always said we could be glorious together. That we could achieve the impossible.”

Curse it, she was good.

I forced myself to tear my gaze away from the sweet temptation of her hopeful face and looked over to the waiting soldiers. She was still my greatest weakness, and she always would be. Knowing it didn’t make me any more capable of resisting her, though.

“Fine,” I answered, not hiding my displeasure as I freed my hands from hers. “Have it your way. But don’t expect me to go soft on anyone.”

“Of course not. You can be as bad-tempered as you want.”

At least Rada had the sense to quickly stifle her triumphant smile as she made her way over to Adesh.

I only half listened as she informed him we would come to Dalath tomorrow after preparing the farm for someone else to take over.

Instead, I busied myself with fetching Nacin and readjusting the straps on his saddle, trying in vain to convince myself this wasn’t a terrible mistake.

Something roiled in my stomach as I watched Rada say goodbye to Tristan. The young man embraced her with obvious familiarity, and when he didn’t let go after a while, instead burying his face in her hair, I cleared my throat.

“We need to leave. There’s a lot to do on the farm if we want to go to Dalath tomorrow.”

Farm Boy finally stepped back at my words, though one of his hands lingered on Rada’s shoulder, and he made another sad puppy face.

“Won’t you be missing a horse?” he asked, with a glance at the wagon where his brother now rested. “Perhaps the two of you should come to the village with us. It might be safer. Kyree and I will leave at once with Khendrik, while Adesh and the others take care of burying the dead.”

“She can ride with me,” I interjected curtly. Rada and I needed to talk far from the ears of the villagers, without any interruptions. I might still be able to make her see reason.

Rada pressed Tristan’s hand with a warm smile. “Thank you, but Bele is right. We have to get back to the farm. I don’t want to leave the animals alone for too long. But don’t worry. We will see each other in Dalath.”

I really couldn’t wait.

Thankfully, Tristan returned to his brother’s side. Yet we still couldn’t leave, as Kyree approached us next. “I will return the Water stone to you when you come to the village,” he murmured, leaning close to me and Rada. “Let’s hope the others didn’t see me use it.”

“It’s not forbidden to own a lyr -stone,” I said with a frown.

“No, just unlikely for simple folk like us,” Kyree replied. “We don’t want any additional scrutiny.”

“No,” Rada said softly, taking his hand. “Thank you, my friend.”

The Aerieth smiled warmly at me. “I’m pleased you’re here with her. She may be the mistress of her fate, but she appreciates the company.”

“Kyree!” Rada exclaimed, shaking her head in mild annoyance.

The healer chuckled. “Don’t complain. Dolores wasn’t exaggerating. You are indeed a fortunate woman.”

“We are only friends,” Rada stated, her tone sharp with danger .

“Of course. Now go. The sooner you come to Dalath the better.” When Rada took Nacin’s reins, Kyree turned to me. “I am glad,” he whispered, “that not all of your kind are unfaithful and indifferent to the fate of others.”

My gaze followed him as he jogged back to the wagon. What an odd comment to make. Could he suspect Rada’s and my true identity?

Resolving to ask her about it later, I mounted Nacin and leaned down to help Rada up. The moment she had settled comfortably behind me, her arms encircling my waist, I spurred my horse onward, the road back to the farm stretching out before us.

“How did Khendrik survive?” Rada beat me to asking the first question the instant we were out of hearing distance, her voice tense. “The Chiasma used the Human life force to open a gate to the Other, didn’t they?”

“Not directly,” I replied, keeping my eyes fixed on the road.

“They used one or more Chaosdaggers to open the gate. The Humans were merely channels for the overflow of untamed Chaos magic. With Yggdrasil’s fall, it is more unpredictable than ever.

Using the life force of others is a blunt but effective way to prevent burning out.

” I shrugged. “That was Vultaron’s mistake.

He channeled more power than he could handle, and it destroyed him.

Chaos is an unforgiving force—one moment of weakness can lead to destruction. ”

“That doesn’t explain why Khendrik didn’t die like the rest of the Humans,” Rada pressed.

“Mmm. I suspect he has a latent ability to wield magic. It’s not uncommon among Humans.

Small, surely, but enough to keep him alive when the others perished.

” My mouth quirked into an unamused smile.

“Perhaps that’s why you felt drawn to his brother.

That proclivity for Chaos probably runs in the family. ”

Rada inhaled sharply behind me, clearly taken aback by my comment. Then she stated firmly, “You are not going to kill Tristan.”

“Why should I concern myself with the fate of a mere farm boy?” I replied, feigning innocence.

She snorted in disbelief. “I saw that look in your eyes earlier. You were contemplating a dozen ways to end his life when I said goodbye to him.”

Unfortunately, I had failed to come up with a method she could not trace back to me. “Believe me,” I said, detesting the mere discussion of him. “I know the boy is irrelevant.”

She shifted around behind me. “Tristan is a very kind man. He was there for me when I felt… well, lonely. He never asked for anything in return, and he deserves so much better than losing everything to the forces of Chaos.”

Maker, she made it sound like the cursed man did her a favor by sleeping with her. When he should have thanked fate on his knees for even being permitted to touch as much as her hand. Then her halting tone registered in my mind. She wasn’t as self-assured about this as she pretended.

“You’re feeling guilty,” I stated, aware it would irk her.

“I am not feeling guilty,” she retorted, bouncing in her indignation—a reaction that almost made me laugh. “Because I have no reason to feel guilty. I believed you were dead. Besides, even if I had known you were not, you have no claim on me.”

Suddenly needling her was no longer amusing.

“No. I never had any claim on you, did I?” I said tonelessly.

“I didn’t mean to imply— ”

“What? That I am nothing more to you than any other man you fell into bed with? Out of boredom? Or curiosity?”

I knew I shouldn’t have said those things, had no right to. Yet the mere thought of her moving on, finding happiness with another, was unbearable. Maker, Aramaz was right. My heart was too lost in darkness to ever comprehend how to love someone.

Rada’s grip on my waist tightened, her voice shaking as she murmured, “Don’t be ridiculous, Belekoroz. What you are to me… There is no word in the tongues of mortals or immortals to describe what is between us.”

She couldn’t give me such an opening and expect me not to pounce on it. “What I am to you? Not what I was?”

An annoyed puff of breath warmed my back even through the wool of my tunic. “Was.”

I yelped as a sharp pain shot through my thigh next. “Did you just pinch me?”

“You deserved it.” No remorse in her retort. “Always playing your bloody games with me.”

“ I am playing games? It seems to me you quite cleverly outmaneuvered me, ensuring I would agree to help your little band of peasants,” I said, arching an eyebrow at her over my shoulder.

She scowled at me. Time to shift the conversation.

“How did Kyree find out you possess a lyr -stone?” I asked, my gaze returning to the road.

Rada sighed. “I used it to heal him when his wing was damaged.”

“By dragon fire?”

“Correct.” She shifted again behind me, clearly massaging her temple. “Maker, he’ll never forgive me if he discovers our true identities. He has little respect for the Ten, and even less for the Anima, and he… ”

“Hates me?” I could imagine. “He suspects something, though. About who you really are.”

“Yes, but his suspicions might have led him to an incorrect assumption about you. And today, you may have unintentionally reinforced that belief.”

Reflecting on Kyree’s enigmatic comments and Rada’s words, I realized she was right. “He thinks I’m one of your Anima.”

“It would explain your—by the way, completely exaggerated—protectiveness toward me.”

I scanned the hills on either side of the road. No sign of danger, but we still should not linger too long in one place. It was bad enough that we were returning to the farm. I spurred Nacin on, causing Rada to tighten her hold on me with a gasp.

“I once swore an oath of fealty to you, my queen,” I reminded her when she had settled into the faster pace. “And I take my oaths seriously.”

“Really?” she asked skeptically. “So you would obey all my orders?”

“Do you wish to command me, Baradaz?”

She scoffed. “I’ll refrain. We both know you’d just twist my words to your advantage.”

Now, that was an unfair amount of suspicion. “I am a bit heartbroken, you know. I expected you to mourn my memory for at least a decade or two,” I said in a pained tone. She stiffened against me. “After all, I was the best you ever had, and—”

My insolence earned me another pinch, yet I could also feel her body shake against mine. “This is not funny,” she pressed out, torn between amusement and irritation.

“You’re laughing; you can’t deny it.” My voice turned smug. “Besides, that you only invited Farm Boy into your bed one single time and never again is quite telling. ”

She hit my shoulder. “I didn’t want to hurt his feelings.”

“Fine. I promise I will let the topic rest forever.” I paused. “Just admit it was abysmal.”

“And say what instead? That you’re the only man who ever satisfied me, who made me soar to such heights of pleasure I could barely remember my own name?”

I patted the arm wrapped around my waist. “See, that wasn’t so hard.”

“What? That’s not what I meant…”

She was still capable of cursing me in at least four different languages. Impressive.

“Just ride us home, you impossible man.”

I fell silent and obeyed. Her head rested against my back, her warmth penetrating through my clothes into my very soul. I was a fool in many things, but even I wouldn’t disturb this unfamiliar but wonderful sense of contentment within me. Our time of peace would be over soon enough.