Page 32 of Dance of the Phoenix (Cloak of the Vampire #3)

Ragnor

That night, as Aileen lay naked in his arms after he’d had his wicked way with her, Ragnor felt a pang of guilt that didn’t allow him to sleep.

While the essence of what he’d told Aileen about Yulia was true, he’d altered the details and lied.

He knew he was being a hypocrite, after she’d bared her soul to him and asked for the same in return, which he adamantly refused to do. But part of it wasn’t simply for Ragnor’s self-preservation, but rather for her own good too.

If Aileen knew the full truth of his past, of who he used to be when he met Yulia and what Yulia had truly meant to him, there would be no going back.

He loved Aileen. He loved her so much that he wanted to protect her from his own dark past. Which he knew Aileen would argue couldn’t be much worse than hers. About which she would also be right.

But the restrictions he had were nothing in comparison.

Because he knew far too much for a mere vampire, even a vampire Lord. If he were to share what he knew, even with Aileen, his lover, his Alara Morreh, then he wouldn’t be the only one to suffer the consequences.

He hated that his only way to protect Aileen from dangers beyond her understanding was to lie.

But seeing as she was already in hot water because of her status as the last Child of Kahil, he knew adding to it wouldn’t just be unwise but utterly dangerous.

And so Ragnor had to live with his guilt as the cost for keeping his loved one safe.