Page 6

Chapter six

Ashia

‘7 Rings’- Our Last Night, Derek DiScanio

‘Baby’- Justin Bieber, Ludacris

‘It Wasn’t Me’- Shaggy, Rik Rok

Two Days Later

After my last client of the day walks out, I lock the door and begin cleaning up. I'm thinking of trying to finish my book tonight instead of watching a movie, and I’m sure all of my brain cells will thank me for it. The book is a sci-fi nonfiction, filled with laser sword battles and armies of cloned warriors. So far, it’s really good. Well, all of the four chapters I’ve been able to focus on and read so far are.

I have another book, but I haven’t brought myself to even open it. A romance novel. Thanks, Ser. I don't need unrealistic expectations of men or love. I’ve witnessed firsthand what those kinds of feelings can bring you, and I’m not interested. I can’t watch romantic movies anymore, even funny ones, without feelings of depression and longing setting in. Then after I notice how manipulative and corrupted the men in those movies are, the only thing I feel is anger. So, I imagine something as detailed as a book won’t be much different.

Then again, if the male main character had the right characteristics, ones such as a strong jaw and blue eyes, I could make that work. Maybe just skip all of the fake adoring scenes and skip right to the smut. Yeah, that could work.

My phone buzzes on the counter beside me as I empty our barbicide bucket, drawing me away from my thoughts, and I answer to hear Serena’s enthusiastic voice.

“Hey girl! What's up?” She practically yells.

“Hey, Ser. Nothing. Just cleaning up the shop. You?”

“Nothing much, I just got home and was going to indulge myself with the banana pudding I bought, but it's a huge container and I need help. So, get your ass over here.” She demands.

“I don't know, Ser. That's sweet, but I was thinking of staying in and reading.” I say with conviction, hoping she won’t feel the need to stop my self-sabotage.

“Bitch, you are always staying in. I'm making a new rule that starts tonight.” Oh, God. I roll my eyes, which I’m sure she can imagine as a huff escapes my lips.

“New rule? Am I thirteen?”

“No, but you're loved. So yes, new rule. You're only allowed to stay in every other night, and you were home last night. And the night before. And the night before that…” She’s sure to drag out the letters in that last sentence.

“Yeah, yeah. I get it. Fine, I'll head over in a few minutes.” I hear her squealing on the other end of the call. “But I'm not following this new rule of yours past tonight.” I point my finger in the air as if she was standing in front of me.

“Fine, party pooper! Bring your ass!” The snapping of her fingers plays behind her voice.

“I’m coming, chill.” She makes a kissing noise through the phone and hangs up. I don’t bother going upstairs and changing or eating dinner first. I'm sure she has something at her apartment I could eat besides pudding, and if I take too long, she’ll just call back anyway. She’s very demanding like that, and she’s quite stubborn. Granted, if she was any less insistent, I’d probably never leave.

I quickly clean everything up, grab my keys and wallet, and head to my car. I'm surprised at how little I actually drive it, but when almost everything I need is within walking distance, it’s become more of an option for escape than a necessity. I do love my car, though. I worked really hard to get it last year, and I try to take good care of it. Even though I don’t use it much, I always have wipes and glass cleaner in the glove box. That way every time I drive it I can wipe it down.

Serena calls it my ‘mom car’. Well, I'm sorry, Ms. Honda Civic, I don’t need a car that goes from zero to a hundred miles an hour in ten seconds. My 2021 Chevy Equinox does just fine, and it has excellent security and safety features. Plus, it fits a lot in the trunk, and the one time a year I need to fill it up, or Ser decides to buy some hideous piece of furniture, it comes in handy. I thought about buying a truck, like her dad has, but I don’t have a need for one, and it takes way too much gas. But I at least stuck with a Chevy like his truck, and he was happy about that, and something inside me warmed the day the expressed his approval over my brand choice.

Even though I've had it for a little over a year, I swear it still has that new-to-me, clean smell from the dealership. I'm not OCD, far from it in fact, but I do like a clean car. It’s one of those luxuries in life that you can give yourself. Every time you sit in it, it feels like a new car or a rental, and somehow it makes you feel better about your upcoming drive. Not that I drive a lot, but toe-may-toe, toe-mah-toe.

Checking the back seat before I get in, my ass slides into the seat and puts my seatbelt on. I’m halfway dreading the drive to her apartment, but only at the anticipation of traffic. Ser lives in a really nice apartment by the hospital about twenty minutes from me. Her salary as a TCRN allows her to afford the apartment, because it really comes in handy when she’s called in. Which is fairly recently. She’s the best trauma nurse they have, and whenever something big comes in they always call her back. I suppose that’s my fault too.

After my attack, she decided to specialize in the trauma department. Even got some outside training from trauma surgeons and triage specialists. Every time she sought outside training, they gave her a raise. Which is fantastic, but that's not why she did it. She even continued her education and got her Bachelor of Science in Nursing. She thought about going to medical school and becoming a surgeon for a while, but she decided that she liked nursing the best. I'm so proud of her.

She may be bossy, fierce, bratty, and a tad overbearing, but she’s my best friend. She’s also sweet, considerate, and compassionate. She loved nursing, even before my attack, and instead of cowering into life with me, she grew and flourished. She’s outgoing, strong, and personable. Everything I'm not anymore, but I always feel a little more like myself when I'm with her.

I always need to hype myself up before I see her. She’s so bubbly and energetic that I feel like I drag her down sometimes. Using my frequently used Spotify app, I turn on my ‘Song Covers’ playlist and play ‘7 Rings’ by Our Last Night, and start driving. She is definitely more of a Pop and Rap music person, but she puts up with my like for Rock, so I put up with her music choices as well. Doesn’t mean I can’t try to mix them when I'm alone.

The drive is always nice, especially in the evenings. The traffic isn’t as bad, and as long as there isn’t a large incoming trauma, the streets by the hospital aren’t backed up. Now, when something has happened? The streets here are chaos, especially when the nearby interstate is backed up, but luckily I don’t deal with it most of the time. It is nice in this part of town. The buildings look newer, and there are more trees and plants along the sidewalks. The business fronts look more colorful and inviting. Probably to chase away the gloom of the nearby hospital, but calming, nonetheless.

Once I come to a red light, I survey my surroundings out of habit. Looking up and down the sidewalks for potential threats before looking into all of my mirrors. I glance into my rearview mirror, and double take to see a tall, chiseled man, wearing a leather jacket on a motorcycle about two cars back. I can only hear my music, but he’s slightly head banging as he looks forward, waiting for the light to change like I am. His large hands drum on his handlebars, and even though he’s still nodding his head around, the hair on the back of my neck rise when I begin to think he’s looking at my car instead of the traffic lights.

His head is facing directly forward at me, and peering over the cars between us, instead of tilting up as if it was towards the lights. Is he moving his head to the same beat as I am? Come on, don’t be so paranoid. I tell myself. There’s no plausible reason why this man would be following me or give two shits about my car. Plus, he could be listening to anything, and the beat could just so happen to match up. Stop being so dramatic, Ashia. Those flowers are driving you to insanity.

They must be, because they’re constantly on my mind. Each flower with an accompanying swaying note runs through my head. Every day. For over a week. Each one complimenting me in some way, as if this admirer is trying to strengthen my resolve and see myself in a different light. This is a prank. It has to be, because my name on each card expels the assumption that the admirer thought someone else lived in my apartment.

Perhaps I’m imagining them. From the years of abuse and loneliness, I’ve finally snapped. Yeah, that’s it. I’m sure hallucinations could be a sleeping side effect that has just recently resurfaced. It was that man. That God of a man that stood outside the shop window and turned my brain to a paranoid and horny mush. What do they call it in Criminal Minds? A trigger? That’s it. My pussy saw that man and thought ‘yes’ while my brain screamed ‘no’, and now the two are fighting each other. Great. My own bodily warfare.

I make it to her apartment building, somehow continuing to drive with my mind blanking on images of the nameless man, park in the parking garage, and walk up to the elevator. I inhale the stale, humid air from inside the enclosed structure, and my face sours.

I hate that it’s almost summer. Whoever says summer is their favorite season, is full of it. Only people who have time and money to constantly be on vacation or in the pool like summer. Us working and broke people? We hate it. It’s hot, too hot at that, muggy, humid, and the town empties from others being gone the whole season. We have the lake close by, but it’s not near clean enough to enjoy. At least, I don’t think so, but only because I used to watch my parents throw their needles in the lake after they got high. So, I don’t step foot in it.

Using my permanent guest card, I scan in and listen to the elevator descend. A sharp squeak, not coming from the elevator, has my head snapping around to stare into the black abyss that is this parking garage. I don’t see anyone, but it sounded like shoes squealing on a basketball court, as if someone walking came to an abrupt stop. Just like my heart at the sound. There's not nearly enough lighting, and I can barely see anything past ten feet in front of me. The humidity speckling small dots of sweat on the back of my neck isn’t helping the goosebumps traveling over my body. I attempt to wipe it all away with my hand, but the uneasiness is still there. I wipe off the sweat on my palm on my jeans, and the touch on my leg causes me to shiver.

Fuck. Why am I so sensitive? Serena is going to have me placed on a 72-hour hold if I don’t relax.

The dinging of the elevator arriving causes me to jump, and once the doors open, I quickly step inside and watch as they close again, shielding me from my paranoia on the other side.

I take a few deep breaths, realizing how ridiculous I feel . I have got to get over this . I think to myself. Once the doors open to the thirteenth floor, I step off and walk to the other end of the hall to her apartment.

The halls are covered in cute, colorful, light wallpaper, and a cushioned grey carpet lays on the floors. It’s very inviting, and I could see the appeal contributing to Serena’s happy mood. A lot of the nurses and surgeons live in this building, so I suppose it was done with them in mind. If I had to deal with death and trauma all day, every day, I’d need this light outlook as well.

I use my key to walk inside and watch as she dances around her living room to some heavy beat, stripping off her scrubs, throwing the articles of clothing all over the room, and prancing in her matching under garments.

I’ve always loved her apartment. It’s spacious and open, with large picture windows that overlook the hospital. The floors are a cool grayish brown, and her walls are a very light, almost white gray that compliments the floors. She has bright yellow accents on her open curtains and couch pillows, and fake flowers on her tables that make the place look inviting.

“I take it you had a good day today?” I ask through giggles as I shut the door and lock it back.

“Hell yeah, girl! I didn’t lose a single patient! Hence the pudding!” She continues to dance, showing off her incredible figure. Her hips swaying in a way that moves every dip and curve in a fluid motion.

“Are you going to put clothes on or is this what our night is going to look like? Because as much as I love you, I’m not sure eating pudding half-naked is on my to-do list.” I chuckle and place my keys and wallet on the end table.

“I’ll put clothes on after you dance with me.” She walks over to her phone and changes the tune, immediately recognizing it as ‘Baby’ by Justin Bieber.

“Please! Dear God! Not Justin Bieber!” I laugh out while shaking my head and throwing my hands up in a mock surrender.

“Come on! I was obsessed with him for forever! ” Her eyes rolling as she practically begs.

“Oh, I remember. That was the only time I’ve ever questioned our friendship.” We laugh loudly as we both start jumping and dancing around. “Well, and then your Taylor Swift era.” I move closer to her in the middle of the living area.

“Girl! You know that era never ended!” She grabs my hands and spins us around before we go back to jumping around, now halfway dizzy. She starts loudly singing with the lyrics, using her hairbrush as a microphone in a dramatic gesture. Jumping back over to me, she grabs my hand as she serenades me with her screeching voice. Poor thing. But she’s smiling so big, and turning so wildly, that her blonde hair comes back around and smacks her in the face. So, who am I to stop her fun?

She moves to the couch, jumping on top of it and then slowly kneeling down, singing in an overdramatic fashion. Swiftly moving from couch to couch, we continue to dance around each other, until she finally tires out enough to jump back to the floor and press her back to mine. Our hair practically tangling in each other as we flail about.

Once the song ends I walk over to the window as she prances to grab her clothes from her room. The view from the area around the hospital is very nice. Especially from this floor. The mountains that surround the city are in clear view, and on days like today when there are some fluffy clouds in the sky, it creates a breathtaking picture. The mountains, which should be green, somehow give off a blue tint instead, the reason behind their name.

I focus my gaze to the top of the hospital as I go to turn, since this floor is just under one section of the roof, and notice one of the security cameras pointed at her window. That hasn’t always been like that. Has it? Surely I would’ve noticed from the countless times I’ve been here.

“Ser?” I yell at her, trying to gain her attention.

“Yeah?” She yells back from her room.

“Did you know one of the security cams is pointed at your window?” She immediately erupts into boisterous laughter, the sound ringing through the apartment.

“It’s not normally, but I had that date with Jake last week.” My eyes widen in paranoia, and I turn to look in the direction of her bedroom. You know, since she was just dancing half-naked in front of it.

“I take it Jake works for hospital security?” I ask, hoping to God that I’m right, and some stranger was not watching my best friend.

“That he does!” I chuckle to myself with relief. Serena has always been a very free and open person. Obviously the fact that she could have been watched didn’t bother her. So, to try and keep the mood light, I push my over-protective feelings to the side.

“Well, remind me to never undress in your apartment again.”

“Don’t worry, I'll scold him in the best of ways!” I rear back in surprise and walk towards her bedroom door.

“Oh? Are you actually going to fuck this one twice?” Serena almost never sticks with the same guy more than once. She says that if they’re worth that much of her attention, then they’re lifelong material. A big jump from one to the other in my perspective, but it’s not like I have any room to talk, or pleasant experiences to back me up.

“I don’t know girl. He wasn’t TERRIBLE.” She says with a drawn-out tone. “I’m sure I'll find someone else by the time I resort to it.” I roll my eyes at her and walk into the kitchen area to grab the pudding out of her pristine fridge and scoop it out into two bowls. I look up to her walking back in with a pair of jeans and tank top on as she goes to turn off the music. “So? You feel better today?” She asks me with a raised brow. I slide her bowl across the counter before I sit on top of it.

“I’ve felt fine Ser?” I say, obviously lying, but as nonchalantly as possible before I take my first bite. A groan escapes my lips, and my eyes almost roll back. The pudding is so smooth against my tongue, and I can tell it’s been made recently because the banana is still firm. I didn’t even know I needed this little scoop of heaven until now.

“You went to the cliff; you don't go there unless you're not okay.” She says as she moves the bowl in her hand towards me and back to her as a gesture.

“I'm fine Ser. I was just thinking about this secret admirer .” I say in a hushed, but dramatic tone.

“Lucky bitch. I want one of those.” She says before taking a bite. I giggle as I swallow.

“Seems like Jake might be?” She shakes her head and scrunches her face in disbelief.

“He just likes my ass.” She says with a mouth full before swallowing. “Your admirer seems to like YOU.”

“He did leave a really sweet note yesterday.” I duck my head and say quietly, without making eye contact, and from the corner of my vision I can see her whole body perk up.

“Oh yeah? What’d this one say?” She asks excitedly.

“Here, I took a picture.” I pull out my phone and pull it up to read it word for word. “I demand a story as disquieting as yours be painted upon the Cathedral walls. A true testament to strength and beauty carved into mythology.” I then glance back at her to see her eyes widen before she drops her spoon back into her bowl.

“Holy shit, where do I find one of those? See! He likes YOU. Not just your perfect ass.” I roll my eyes at her comment about my ass, knowing that hers would be picked over mine any day.

“You are very likeable Ser. Regardless of your ass.” I try to reassure her.

“Eh. I don't need to be liked. I need to be fucked.” I snort a laugh, almost spitting out my pudding. “And so do you. It's been way too long. Maybe try finding out who this admirer is.” She shrugs her shoulder.

“Nope, I'm fine. I don't need a man touching me, and I certainly don’t need to meet the mystery man that happens to know where I live.” I say dismissively.

“Oh, come on, Ash! You need to loosen up. Maybe this admirer could dust the cobwebs off of your pussy.” She says as she shakes her body, shimmying her shoulders enough to sway her breasts.

“Ewe! I just don’t think I'm ready for that, Ser.” She stops shaking abruptly.

“I'm not going to sit back and watch you end up alone, and you're stuck with me. So, the only plausible solution is to get you ready to assimilate back into the dating environment.” She raises her eyebrows and purses her lips at me.

“Or hear me out, you could be a doll, and leave me the hell alone.” We laugh and I start to wash my bowl out. Serena sets her bowl down on the counter and looks at me with a concerned gaze.

“I just know how badly you wish you had someone to love. I don't want you to be alone forever.” She looks at me with soft eyes, and I can’t help the anxious wave that floods my body. I hate that she worries so much about me, and she might even be starting to pity me. I can’t stand the thought of that either.

“I’m fine, Ser. I don’t need meaningless people in my life. I mean, come on, you’re not lonely? No offense, but one-night stands aren’t necessarily meaningful connections.” I put her bowl in her dish rack and turn back to her.

“Hell no girl, our hospital is practically Grey’s Anatomy, and I'm comparable to Mark Sloan. Well, Mark before Lexie.” She winks at me.

“Are you openly calling yourself a whore?”

“Hey, I wear my badge with honor.” We laugh again as she looks down at her phone. Her bright green eyes widening in shock. “Oh shit! We’ve got to go!”

“Go?” She grabs her keys and then my hand, pulling me along with her with almost enough force to yank my arm out of my socket. “Where are we going!?” She rushes me through the apartment and up to the front door.

“On an adventure! Come on we can’t be late!” Without question, we run down the hallway to the elevator, make our way downstairs to the lobby, and out of the front doors. She runs down the sidewalk and I follow closely behind her as our steps crunch along the concrete. After a few turns, and down a few streets, she takes us down a side street and turns us into a large grass field.

We double over and stop only for a moment to catch our breath, and I seize the opportunity to look up and take in our surroundings. A tall, chain-link fence stands in front of us. The area behind piled high and scattered with abandoned cars.

“Oh my God, Ser. We can NOT do this.” I know exactly what she’s thinking, and last time we did this, we almost got arrested.

“It’s fine, Ash! I was with Robby last week and he said we could, we just had to do it before dark. That’s why we’re in a hurry. Come on!” She takes my hand again and pulls me up to the fence before she starts climbing it.

“You know, I'm starting to regret ever teaching you how to do this!” She stops at the top and straddles the horizontal pole.

“Oh, my sweet little delinquent, I’ve learned much naughtier things since.” She giggles before dropping to the ground.

I lace my fingers through the cold metal and climb over myself, internally thankful that I can still climb these as easily as I used to. We quietly walk through the rows of cars as her head moves side to side, seemingly like she’s looking for something in particular.

“So why did we have to do this before dark? And if it’s okay, why are we sneaking in?” I scrunch my eyebrows at her and ask accusingly.

“Robby doesn’t want a liability after its dark, and because we can be caught on the cameras inside if we come in from the front. If Robby’s dad found out we’re here again, we’d be fucked.” She shrugs her shoulders as she avoids eye contact with me.

“Oh, so really we’re not allowed?” I cross my arms over my chest and ask sarcastically.

“Eh, there’s no true answer to that question.” I giggle as we come up to an old-looking Ford truck, conveniently placed in what seems to be the only open spot in this junk yard. The paint has been sanded down, and I'm not sure it has any parts left under the hood, but there’s two pairs of safety glasses, two baseball bats, two knives, and two crow bars on the open bed of it. “Oh, hell yeah, thank you Robby. Go on girl, get your glasses on!” I hesitantly grab a pair and put them on before grabbing a baseball bat.

“You want first hit?” I shrug my shoulders and hold the bat out to her.

“Nope, but I call stabbing the passenger seat! All the movies say bad people hide shit in there and I want to see if I can find some paraphernalia!” I chuckle at her naivety.

“Suit yourself.” I climb onto the bed of the truck, the shocks squealing as it bounces with motion, and leap onto the top of the roof, still holding the bat in my hand. Looking down and over at her, I wait, my mind full of hesitation. “You’re sure this is okay? I don’t want you getting into trouble with the law.”

“Yeah, he said he’d pick one they’re getting ready to crush. No biggie! Robby said he’d make sure to clean up before his dad came to work in the morning.” The confirmation was all I needed to lift the bat up high above my head and drive it down into the front windshield. The spider web looking cracks, and the crunching sound that emerges already makes me feel a little better. As if the crackling sound also came from my muscles and not just the glass. “Oh shit! Alright hulk, get down from there, it’s my turn.” I hop down back into the bed, and she picks up her bat, immediately driving it into the driver’s side window like she’s known how to swing it her whole life.

“Hell yeah!” I yell out excitedly as she squeals at the damage she caused.

“Jesus Christ! This might be better than sex! No wonder vandalism is a crime!” We ring out laughing as she pulls out her phone and plays ‘It Wasn’t Me’ by Shaggy and Rik Rok from her phone. My laughter immediately intensifies, seeing the irony in her song choice.

“Seriously?!” I have tears spring to my eyes as I hold on to my side I'm laughing so hard.

“Go on girl, get that frustration out!” I walk over to the other side of the truck and take out that window as well. Hitting the side of the truck over and over until the dents make the door look like Swiss cheese. Every hit, every crunch of glass, every grunt as we swing chips away at the buildup of anger, fear, and sadness I’ve had lately.

Then I move to the headlights, the taillights, back windshield, and truck bed. The truck falls to be my victim and I’m grateful for its sacrifice as I continue to ruin and maim the it. Serena demolishes the inside and slashes the tires, stabbing the fabric of the seats with a knife as if she’s suddenly a psychopath. She didn’t find her treasure, but I don’t think she minded once she took a crowbar to the radio.

The very last thing I want to do, I only hesitate before Serena retreats out of the cabin of the truck. I climb on to the hood, and use three hard thrusts of my leg to kick the windshield in. Luckily, my hands catch the top of the truck before I fall inside with the large glass pane, and I’m left to revel in my achievement.

“Whoo! Hell yeah girl! Look at your strong ass legs!” I look over to her as she throws her crowbar and glasses into the truck bed. So, I take the hint, hop down, and do the same. We’re both extremely sweaty and tired, but I can tell how much more relieved we both are. As if every worry or stressful thought is slowly seeping out of skin with every drop of sweat. “Damn, that’s a good workout.” She says as she wipes her forehead.

“Oh yeah, we’ll be sore as hell tomorrow, but it’s going to be so worth it.” We laugh as we start walking back through the maze of cars to the fence. “Thank you, so much, Ser. I really needed that. You’re amazing.” She steps closer to me before wrapping her arm around my shoulder.

“You know I got you, bitch. I know I work a lot too, but I'm always here for you.” Her words strike a pang of sadness into my chest, and suddenly it makes me feel guilty. She does work a lot, she’s a trauma nurse for fucks sake, yet she does always make time for me. I need to be a better friend and ‘sister’. I don’t call or see her like I should. I've been such a selfish bitch, so caught up in feelings I should already be over. She deserves better from me, and I make it a point to actively push myself to do more.

“I know, and I'm very grateful for it.” I say as I wrap my arm around her torso and pull her on for a big hug. She squeezes me tightly, and then plants a quick kiss to my sweaty cheek before we keep walking.