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Chapter forty-five

Ashia

Everything hurts. My stomach and throat are on fire, and that almost overpowers the throbbing in my head. My muffled hearing isn’t allowing much through besides a consistent beeping, but I heard him say he loves me…I couldn’t comprehend the rest, but the rest didn’t matter in that moment.

Forcing those words out of my mouth felt like choking on razors, but he needs to hear them. I need him to hear them… I feel the I.V. in my left arm and the oxygen shooting up my nose smells different than normal air. Pure. I had almost forgotten what that smelled like.

I feel his hands on my face, holding on for dear life. His shaky breaths caress my forehead and I feel water drip onto my face.

“Are you crying?” I manage to force out through the scorching feeling in my throat. My vision clears enough to see him turn his head and sniffle, trying to contain himself, but then looks back to me.

“I thought I lost you…” He chokes out.

“I’m right here.” He leans back down and nestles his forehead against mine before he kisses my forehead, my nose, and over to my cheek. “I’m right here, baby.” I’m grabbing onto his arm, but mine feels so heavy. Everything feels heavy. My chest, my limbs, and even my eye lids. The longer I force them open, the easier it seems to be, but I’m so tired... I drop my arm down to feel something cold and solid on the bed. Running my fingers over it, I can feel the shape, and I’m startled to feel the trigger under my fingertips. “Is there a…gun on the bed?” I ask through my heavy breath.

“Fuck…um, yeah. I should probably give that back.” He moves it to the chair behind him.

“Give it back?” I draw in a deep breath. “Whose was it?” I shudder at a loud cracking noise, and I hear feet stomp into the room. Two men walk up and try to detain Damien, throwing their arms around him and trying to drag him out. “Wait, please…”

“Alright officers, let him go! He’s fine now!” That voice sounds vaguely familiar. I look over to the door to see Damien’s dad. They let him go, and they stand staring at each other aggressively. I can feel the tension deepen within the room, and the increase in the beeping from the monitor gives away my nervousness.

“Can someone please…tell me what the fuck happened…” I say through my burning throat and hard breaths. My chest feels so tight, like someone is pulling drawstrings. Damien then walks back over, and sits next to me, grabbing my hand. He gently caresses and moves a hand to my cheek, wiping it with his thumb. If I’m crying, I can’t tell, but I imagine so with the amount of pain I’m in.

“While we were gone, someone snuck in the house and poisoned all of the alcohol. I’ve already got guys testing everything else in that fucking house.”

“Someone poisoned me?” I take a deep breath in. I'm in pain, and I know I should care a little more than I do, but I don't. I just want to go home. I want him to hold me in our bed. I want to keep making random meals at two in the morning when he comes home. My thoughts trail off to an image of me randomly crawling into his lap in the living room. Granted, if I was dead I couldn't do any of those things. Someone really tried to kill me…it's not the first time, but it's the first time I've been poisoned. Maybe I'll get a metal for this one. “When can we go home?”

“As soon as they tell us when you'll be discharged I'll find us a place, baby.” He says as he squeezes my hand.

“No. I want to go home. ”

“It’s not safe there, Ashia.”

“No where is going to be safe…until this Dranan guy is dead. So, if we’re going…to be ‘not safe’ somewhere, it’s going to be our home. Please, Damien…just take me home…” My voice cracks, and I can tell by the agony on his face that I’m definitely crying. He stands up, runs his hand over my head, and kisses my forehead.

“Oh my God, Ash!” Serena runs in and practically jumps on top of me. The force of her body sends a sharp pang throughout my body. I grunt in pain, and she pulls back. “Oh God, I'm so sorry.”

“It's okay Ser.” I see her pretty green eyes pierce through her tears as she holds my other hand.

“You scared the shit out of me.” Her voice cracks.

“I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to be sorry you compliant bitch. Just…just…”

“I know.” She squeezes my hand again.

“I'll make some calls. Get the security at the house amped up and have someone get the rest of your things and your car from the apartment.” Damien says.

“You’re not going to run off…guns blazing are you?”

“No, baby girl. I'm staying right here. I’m not leaving your side.” We look at the door to see a doctor walk in.

“Is it safe to come in?” He says, and I huff, thinking it’s a joke. While everyone else has a serious look on their face.

“Why wouldn’t it be safe?” I ask looking around the room, my gaze landing on Damien who’s chewing on the inside of his cheek. The fucking gun. “Did you point a gun at my doctor?” I force out in one breath.

“Yeah, I did.” He admits. “I'm sorry, doc.”

“He’ll behave from now on. Right?” I say looking over at him again and squeezing his hand.

“Yes. I will behave.” I turn back to the doctor and smile.

“I promise, he’s actually a big teddy bear.”

“Most likely a grizzly, but definitely a bear.” He says angrily. “I’m doctor Derek Montow, I’ve been treating you since your arrival. I just wanted to give you a quick update.” I've met Derek before; he treated me when I was rushed in all of those years ago. He’s also Ser’s friend, but I understand the need for formalities, so I nod my head.

“When you first arrived, you presented with symptoms of poisoning, as well as aspiration of bodily fluids. You were administered CPR prior to your arrival, and we did have to shock you twice to revive you. Once we had a steady rhythm, we administered an antidote that fit the description of the poison you ingested, and the symptoms subsided fairly quickly. You did have an adverse reaction to the antidote, you seized again, and you needed to be resuscitated a second time.” He looks between me and Ser to make sure we’re getting everything.

“We have you on antibiotics in hopes that the vomit and blood you aspirated won’t cause pneumonia. It’s most likely going to be difficult for you to breathe until they clear completely, which is why we still have you on oxygen. Your stomach lining was damaged, so we’ll have you on a liquid diet until that heals, possibly a week or a little longer. From your past medical history, if your stomach is unable to handle a normal liquid diet, we will need to put in a feeding tube. Only as a last resort, but I just want you to be prepared for that.”

“I would like to keep you as long as possible so we can keep an eye on everything. Sometimes these poisons can have prolonged effects, but you are up and talking, and that’s a very good sign. A nurse will be in to take blood samples every four hours and check your vitals and your temperature every hour until they’re a little more stable. If you spike a fever, we’ll increase the antibiotics. We want to make sure you don’t develop any infections, and we’re going to use your blood samples to track the amount of the poison still in your system. After the next twenty-four hours, we’ll only draw blood twice a day.”

“I'll do it Derek, I don’t want another nurse in here.” Serena demands.

“That’s fine.” He says softly to her before turning back to me. “Your blood pressure is a little on the lower side, and your heart rate still has not regulated back to a normal rhythm. If it doesn’t regulate back in eighteen hours, we’ll consult a cardiologist. But for now, you’re doing just fine. There’s a call button attached to your bed. If you start to feel dizzy, lightheaded, or it becomes more difficult to breathe just press that button.” I nod my head at him. “I assume this was no accident, so our Chief of Security is on his way up to speak to you all, and we’ll be moving you to a more secure wing soon.” Damien stands up and holds his hand out to him.

“Thanks, Doc. I am sorry.” He takes it and shakes it.

“I have a wife, I understand how scary this is. Let’s just refrain from fire arms from this point forward.” Damien nods at him.

“Thank you, Derek.” I say to him before he walks out. “I'm going to be in here a week?”

“However long it takes for you to get better. You should listen to the doctor.” Mr. Hartley says. I’m honestly surprised to see him here, but I don’t know how long I’ve been out, and I’m just happy that Damien had him here. Our attention is drawn to Carter when his phone rings.

“It’s Zander.” He answers it and walks out. “Hey, what do you got?...” His voice trails off as he exits.

“Serena, you don’t have to stay. You should go home.” I say to her.

“Fuck no, I'm not leaving. I will grab some coffee though and update mom and dad. You want some?” She looks to Damien.

“Yeah, thanks.” She kisses my cheek and walks out.

“I'll go make some calls.” His dad says and walks out. I look over to Damien and he’s trying to hide the fact that he’s wiping tears from his face.

“I’m okay baby, you're not getting rid of me that easily.” He huffs out a laugh as I wipe a tear from his cheek. Then he leans forward and kisses me deeply before pressing his forehead against mine. I can feel the shakiness in his body as we stay close together. Not really talking or moving, and I notice his fingers fidgeting.

“You’re just itching to kill people aren’t you?”

“Fuck yeah I am.” I choke out a small laugh, but he’s anything but amused. “I'm going to make him pay.”

“I know you are, and I'm smart enough now to know better than to try and talk you out of it.” He nods gently and closes his eyes.

“I’m so sorry, baby…” He chokes out, trying to hold back a sob.

“Damien, don’t this isn’t…” I’m interrupted as Carter walks back in. His face is sunken, and he looks worried. Partially taken over by anger and the other by sadness. Damien stands up straight, his body pulling taut.

“What’s going on?”

“Zander can’t find anything on how they got in. The cameras don’t show anything . I walked him through it, and there’s a split second interruption in the feed, but I can’t find how they got in the system to loop it back like that.”

“So, we have no idea what they did, how they did it, and when they did it?” Damien asks through gritted teeth.

“Nope. They’re good. If someone can get into our system and manipulate it this well, we have a huge problem.” Carter warns.

“Damien.” Mr. Hartley calls as he walks back into the doorway. I'm not sure what they’re silently talking about, but he and Damien are looking at each other like they’re having a silent conversation. Mr. Hartley’s eyes are pleading, almost desperate, while Damien looks unsure and angry. Downright pissed off, actually. He bites his bottom lip, and I see the muscles in his jaw clench. He’s contemplating something serious. Something he doesn’t even want to imagine, but now he has to.

He then looks back at me and runs the back of his fingers over my cheek, studying every feature of my face. As if looking at me alone could solve all of his turmoil. He then takes a deep breath, like he’s decided something, and turns his attention back to his dad.

“Call. Give me everything you've got. Every man. Every weapon. Every poor soul you can find.” He says through gritted teeth as he fists his hands by his side. His stance tenses, and it’s as if his body hardens to stone.

He’s getting ready for violence, and a lot of it. This isn’t just about saving people anymore or keeping drugs off the streets. Our whole world, his entire existence, changed at the drop of a dime. What happened yesterday pulled him into somewhere dark, and I'm not sure anything is going to be the same again.

Someone, or multiple someone’s, broke into our home. They invaded the one place that’s symbolic to him. Entered his security like it was his mind and proved that it wasn’t safe. That nothing and no one is safe. He’s in fight or flight, and Damien doesn’t know what flight is. His world was threatened and his hopes shattered.

This isn’t just a fight.

This is war.