Page 20 of Cruel Russian Pakhan (Safin Bratva #1)

I was livid!

As soon as Lev shoved me into the vehicle and holstered his gun, I tore into him. I didn’t care if Rocco heard. I didn’t care about anything anymore.

I glared at him. “Are you certifiably insane? How dare you put a gun to my head and then drag me away!”

Lev’s eyes blazed. “Did you not hear Artyom say he was going to marry you off?

Do you think for one second that a man who wants you to have surgery so he could fulfill his need of sleeping with a virgin is going to treat you properly?

He isn't going to put up with half the shit that I do, Katya!

A lot of these Bratva men aren't like me!”

“And you’re going to marry Vera!” I snapped.

“I’m sure we could’ve talked to him, but no, you felt the need to act like a caveman!

There could be worse things than being married to a man who wants me to tighten my vagina, Lev.

I could have a husband who kidnapped me!

Or one who locked me up like I was a freaking prisoner!

Or one who put a loaded gun to my head! Oh, that's right, I already have one of those!”

My voice darkened. “Lev, you ruined today for me. I was scared I’d say or do something wrong that would make them not like me. Never in a million years did I think you would be the reason they wouldn’t!”

“Artyom wanted me to kill you,” he growled.

“He’s angry! He respected his father. If you found out your father had an illegitimate child, I’m sure you’d be pissed, too. But he would’ve come around eventually!”

Tears streamed down my face, my voice cracking.

“You knew how much this meant to me.” My voice dropped.

“You’re just like him…Artyom. Pig-headed and controlling.

As long as you get what you want, you don’t give a damn about anyone else.

If they don't want anything to do with me after today, I'll never forgive you.”

The car stopped in Lev's compound, and I didn’t wait. I flung the door open, jumped out, and stormed to my room. My hands shook as I locked the door behind me—not that it mattered. Lev had a key.

I curled up in bed, wrapping my arms around a pillow, and cried, praying that after the stunt Lev pulled that my siblings still wanted to get to know me.

About an hour passed before I heard the door unlock. I faced the wall, refusing to look at him. I was still furious and didn’t want to see or speak to him.

His footsteps approached the bed, and the mattress sank beneath his weight. I hugged the pillow tighter, trying to make myself small.

“Dinner will be ready in fifteen minutes,” he said quietly.

I said nothing.

“In case you forgot, Artyom may be your brother, but I’m still your husband.

” His voice was strained as he continued, “He had no right to suggest you stay there without consulting me. And then disrespect me by saying he already had a husband for you? The least he could’ve done was wait for the damn annulment. ”

I stayed silent. Lev was right. Legally, he was my husband. But in everything else, he was just a roommate. I didn't understand why he was fired up about me staying and getting remarried when he and Artyom made a deal that included him marrying Vera.

I let the silence stretch out between us, determined not to speak to him.

I heard him blow out a breath, frustration clear. “Fine, then, stay here. Suit yourself.”

The bed shifted again as he stood up. I heard footsteps heading for the door, then the door opened and closed.

And just like that, I was alone again.

I waited an hour and a half before leaving my room. I was starving, but the thought of running into Lev made my stomach churn. As I reached the bottom of the stairs, I heard voices coming from the lounge. My heart quickened when I realized it was Mariya and the others.

I tiptoed to the open door, straining to hear.

“Lev, what you did today was reckless,” Jaroslav said.

His voice was calm, but there was an edge of disappointment.

“When Yegor called and sent the video footage, I called everyone. This isn’t a Bratva problem, this is a sibling problem.

I’m worried about you. You haven’t been yourself lately.

We can’t afford for you to make mistakes that could get you killed. ”

“I knew Artyom wouldn’t have me killed,” Lev answered. “He might be arrogant, but he’s not an idiot.”

“So, Artyom, who named us the enemy, had you in his clutches, threatening his sister, and you really think he wouldn’t have killed you?” Marten scoffed.

Avit added, “Had you died and the footage leaked, it would’ve shown you in the wrong, shattering everything we uphold as a faction, especially when it comes to women and children. Hell, if the footage leaked now, we'd crumble faster than the fucking walls of Jericho.”

I flinched at the thought, but stayed silent, trying not to draw attention to myself.

“Lev, why are you so against Katya getting remarried?” Mariya asked. I heard the confusion in her voice. “She's the sister of a Bratva leader, and she will be in high demand. It’s bound to happen. You may have stopped it this time, but it’s inevitable.”

Ninel asked quietly, “Lev…do you have feelings for Katya?”

Pyotr swore under his breath, then chuckled softly.

“You do like her. In all the years I’ve known you, Lev, you’ve always calculated every move, controlled every variable.

But the thought of Katya being someone else’s wife?

That rattled you. For the first time in your life, you acted before you thought.

And once you were in the situation you couldn't back down from because you wanted to protect her.”

The silence that followed made my heart lurch. Was that what this was all about? Did Lev really have feelings for me? Was that why he kept acting hot and cold?

“Yes, Lev, I’d like to know as well,” I spoke, stepping into the room. All eyes turned to me, but my gaze was fixed on Lev. He stood as I approached, his face turning cold, a mask falling into place.

“When we got to the church after you kidnapped me, you could’ve used brute force to remove me from the van, but you didn’t.

Then you protected me during the shootout, held me after when I thought I was going to fall apart.

During our training sessions, you’ve been gentle, and calm…

a great teacher.” My breath hitched, but I forced myself to keep going as his eyes darkened.

“We may not have always gotten along, but when I felt the barrel of your gun pressed to my temple…that was the first time I was actually afraid of you. The first time I felt my life was in real danger around you.”

I saw a flicker in his eyes before it faded. “Help me understand,” I said, my voice trembling. “Why did the controlling man I know act…irrationally?” I stepped towards him, my eyes pleading with his. “Please, I need to understand.”

There was no warmth in Lev’s gaze as he looked at me. It was cold and lethal, locked on me with a fury that snatched my breath from my throat.

“Nothing about what I did today was irrational. Don't let Pyotr’s assumptions go to your head. As I told you before, you're a wife of convenience. I needed to show Artyom that just as you're a pawn to him, you're a pawn to me.”

I heard a sharp gasp behind me, but I didn’t turn around. My heart chipped away with every word that fell from his lips; those same lips that gave me pleasure. I fought the tears threatening to fall.

Lev smirked, but it didn’t reach his eyes.

“The difference is, he needs you more than he’s willing to admit.

Artyom crossed the line today. Whether he likes it or not, I’m still your husband, and that means I control your movements, not him.

” His voice dropped, hardening. “I don’t trust him not to back out of our deal.

Him making plans to ‘sell you off’ as a wife just confirms it.

You’ll return to Artyom after I marry Vera, not a moment sooner. ”

By the time he finished, I felt sick. A pawn. A wife of convenience. I meant nothing to him. His words crushed me and left me bleeding out.

I spun on my heel and ran out the door.

Footsteps followed me, but I didn’t stop. I burst into my room, slamming the door behind me, only to have it open moments later. Ninel and Mariya rushed in, and Mariya immediately wrapped her arms around me, guiding me to the sofa. I collapsed into her embrace, sobbing uncontrollably.

I felt Ninel's hand soothing my back and she spoke softly to me and Mariya. “I don't care what Lev said, I think Pyotr is right. I think Lev has fallen for you.”

I wanted to believe Ninel, but where was the evidence to show it? It couldn't be the sex, since I was obviously just used to scratch an itch like a one-night stand.

“Fallen for me?” I choked out. “Didn't you hear what he said? And you don't pull guns on the people you love.”

“If it meant getting you away from Artyom, he would. He told us what happened when you got there,” Ninel said gently.

Mariya spoke then. “Lev has never had the luxury of having a steady relationship. When our parents died ten years ago, he was thrown into the leadership role. He was twenty-eight and expected to fill some mighty big shoes. Ninel was only eleven then, Pyotr was fifteen, I was seventeen, Avit was twenty-one, Marten twenty-four, and Jaroslav twenty-six. So, Lev not only had to be a leader, but a parent as well.”

Despite how angry I was at Lev, my heart went out to him. Having to deal with losing his parents, raising his siblings and stepping up as a Bratva leader couldn't have been easy.

But he had sisters. He didn't have to be a complete ass when it came to my feelings.

“I'm so sorry about your parents. How did they die?” I sniffed.

Mariya's voice grew sad. “It was an ambush.

Mom wanted food from her favorite Thai restaurant.

At the time, there was a rift with another Bratva leader.

It wasn't safe to leave home, but Dad loved Mom, so they went together.

Lev heard the whole thing. He said Mom was Dad's weakness.

After their funeral, he told us he couldn't afford to have a weakness when he had six younger siblings to take care of and a faction to hold together. He wrapped all his feelings up and dropped them in the deepest part of the ocean.”

I leaned against Mariya, her heartbeat helping to soothe me. Lev was hurt. He saw love as a weakness. In his mind, it wasn't strength since his parents died because of it. Mariya sharing that with me made me understand him more.

Mariya pulled back just enough to see my face. “Do you love Lev?”

I rolled my lips inward and pulled into her again, but nodded. If I opened my mouth to say how much I loved Lev, I'd burst into tears again.

“Since that's the case, I'm sure he'll come around if the way he reacted today was any indication,” Ninel said.

Mariya agreed. “I think Ninel is right. What Lev did down there, what he said was totally wrong—it was an asshole move, don't get me wrong, but I think he needs time to figure out his feelings, especially if he's never felt them before.”

“So, until he stops being an asshole and admits that he's in love with you, we'll be here for you.” Ninel hugged me from the back.

“But what about Vera? I’m her sister, I don't want to hurt her,” I said. I sat up slowly, and Mariya took one of my hands in hers while Ninel held the other.

“You are. But don't forget she is also your sister, your older sister.

She wouldn't want to hurt you, either. She'd want to protect you, and I'm sure right now that she's worried about you and pissed at Lev, wanting his head on a silver platter.

Besides, you can't help who you fall in love with. It just…happens,” Mariya said.

I nodded.

Ninel smiled mischievously. “One thing I know about Lev is when he sets his mind on something he wants, he not only does everything in his power to get it, but he does everything in his power to keep it. And he wants you, Katya.”

“The question is,” Mariya asked seriously, “Can you wait until he sorts through things in his head?”

I looked from Ninel to Mariya. “I can try.”

Ninel's smile broadened. “That's good enough for me.”