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CALLIOPE

C rew cried in my arms for at least twenty minutes as we sat in the airport lounge. How did parents do it? How did they manage to console their children when they felt just as bad?

I noticed my tears had dampened his downy, little boy hair and snuggled him, drawing as much comfort from him as I provided.

I texted Tom once we had successfully passed security and then focused on consoling and distracting Crew in equal measure.

I planned to save the tablet and TV shows for while we were on the plane, but it wasn’t long before he was tired of the puzzles and books I had brought.

By the time we were able to board, I was exhausted, though I doubted I would be able to rest on the flight.

I texted both Tom and Kelsey once we had safely boarded the flight, knowing that one was excited about our return while the other was dreading our departure.

And Crew? He was stuck right in the middle of it all.

Thankfully, he behaved on the flight and was excited to see his mother and Sam once we landed.

Maybe that was the bright spot? He could put a bandaid on the hurt he felt leaving his father with his excitement to see his mother.

Kelsey and Sam were both at the airport when we landed, and they took turns hugging Crew before we collected our luggage and headed to their home. I let them catch up with their son and excused myself to head to my room.

My bedroom was on the third floor, so I had a good amount of privacy and access to their rooftop patio. They had been clear that I was off for the next few days; I wasn’t expected to do more than travel with him this round.

Me to Monica: Do you have time to meet for a drink tonight?

Monica: Sure! I can’t wait to hear all about the first rotation.

I sent her the location of a brewery I wanted to try, and we planned to meet at seven.

I took a shower, feeling the need to wash off the airport grime before leaving for the night.

I had a car, but I had left it at my parents’ house in Concord instead of leaving it in the city while I was gone.

Instead of picking it up, I ordered an Uber to bring me to meet Monica.

“Hey,” Kelsey said as I walked through the kitchen on my way to wait for my ride. “I know I didn’t really get to talk to you when you got back, but I hope everything went well for the first trip?”

“Yeah, we had settled into a routine by the time we left.”

“I know. This is disruptive to everyone,” she said, looking to where Sam and Crew played together in the family room. What are your plans tonight?”

“I’m meeting Monica for drinks to catch up.”

“Oh, good! I always worry that she never takes time for herself. She’s been a godsend to us, and we’ve called on her more than a few times in the middle of the night. She never says no.”

“She never will say no. And I’m not saying that to make you feel bad. She loves every second of it. She especially likes to be the one who solves what seems like an impossible problem.”

“We’ve tested her over the last year and a half. But she’s been with Sam for a lot longer. But go, take advantage of your time off. I’m sure you’ve earned it.”

I waved to Sam, and Crew ran over to hug me goodbye. “Song tonight?” he asked.

I looked over at Kelsey for assistance. “Not tonight, Crew. We have a movie night with Pops.”

“No game?”

“Not tonight. It’s just us.”

It was then that I noticed the Uber waiting out front for me and took the opportunity to slip out the door.

Other than the texts I sent Tom letting him know we had landed safely, I hadn’t really talked to him.

That didn’t sit well with me. After spending the last week plus with him in his home, I didn’t like the distance.

And the time off felt almost unsettling.

Me to Tom: What are you doing?

I wondered if he’d even be back home; the two-hour time difference would mean he could still be at practice.

Tom: Showering and then headed home. You?

Me: Meeting Monica for drinks. I have the next few days off.

Tom: Good for you. Is Crew good?

Of course, he would want to confirm that. I’m sure he’d already talked to Kelsey or Sam.

Me: Yes. He was sad to leave but really happy when he saw K this was only my first trip. I barely know them. How has this family become so important to me so quickly?”

“You are living in their homes and are fully responsible for Crew. I remember when Sam first met Kelsey and Crew. They had an immediate connection. One day, Sam was this lonely bachelor and boom, he was all in. That little boy is like a magnet. He will draw you right in.”

“And you thought I needed to be drawn into their lives?”

“Yeah. I thought it would be good for all of you. I didn’t recognize you after Zander betrayed you. You needed a major change, even if it had you moving across the country. But no, it wasn’t a fix-up. Shit that would be weird as hell.”

I thought I had successfully hidden how bad it was.

The relationship was only a small part of what had torn my psyche apart.

I knew there were issues with our relationship, but I wasn’t blind.

But I thought our common interests and shared excitement over work were enough to make up for the lack of chemistry we had elsewhere.

Not just the sexual chemistry, though he loved to make me feel as though there was something wrong with my level of interest in sex.

Color me crazy, but I thought men were always looking for women who loved sex.

I ordered another beer, filled her in on all of the details, gave her the scoop on the hockey WAGs, and did my best to get any information out of her that wasn’t locked up tight by an NDA.

“As much as I’d like to hand you the information and make things easy on you, get to know him on your terms and his. Organically.”

I yawned, and the long day finally caught up with me. “I think I need to head home for the night.”

We both ordered an Uber and waited together for our rides. I hugged my friend goodbye, and we went our separate ways. Pulling up in front of Sam and Kelsey’s home, the extravagance again struck me, and even with everything they had, they were so freaking normal.

Once I had curled up into my bed, I remembered my promise to Tom.

Me: Hey, back home and safe.

Tom’s response was almost instantaneous.

Tom: I was just starting to get nervous. Fun night?

Me: Yes. A couple of beers and a nice chat.

Tom: Good. It’s quiet around here. I missed you guys today.

Me: I missed you too.

It took Tom a few minutes to respond, and I had started to doze off when the message indicator popped up on my phone screen.

Tom: Goodnight, beautiful.

Me: Goodnight.