Page 9

The next morning was a shit show of epic proportions. Between the packing, the yelling, and the inevitable havoc that broke out whenever all of us were home, it was no wonder I forgot about my mom and her matchmaking.

At least…until it was time for me to claim my spot inside Lacey’s van next to Mavis, and I realized in my haste to be helpful, I’d made the mistake of dropping my guard. All it took was one glance after yanking the door open to understand that I had been betrayed.

Again.

My seat was already occupied. Roderick smiled at me, glasses glinting as he offered me an unapologetic wave. I was so surprised to see him that I did a double take. Mavis was unconcerned, sitting obediently with a stuffed lion tucked protectively in her lap, its mane almost as matted as her own hair. I’d watched Lacey comb it that morning, so it was a mystery how she’d managed to get it that messy that quickly .

Kid magic.

“What are you doing in Lacey’s car?” I asked, already anticipating the answer. “I assumed…you would be riding with Juniper? You know…your fiancée?” Maybe he’d forgotten. Perhaps this was a fluke and he’d hop right out and thank me for the reminder.

“Your mom invited me.”

“My mom… invited you?”

“Yes. When I told her all the other spots were full of coolers.”

“Jesus.” Mom had packed ten coolers herself. I knew because I’d helped. One of them had been entirely filled with bacon.

Roderick appeared benign, but he was far from innocent. “So here I am!” Roderick’s jazz hands were awkward as hell. Fingers still wiggling, he offered me the same cheeky grin that had made me weak-kneed in high school. Now it just made me want to pull my hair out. Or stab him. Or both. “Don’t worry. We made sure you had a ride.”

“You made sure that I…” My sentence was cut off when I felt a familiar wall of heat at my back. A shadow fell over me, slipping along the sun-sanded surface of the paint on the hood of the van. The scent of designer cologne filled my nose.

No.

No.

No.

“I’ve got a free spot in my car.” Alex’s voice was cheery. “Not to worry, my pretty little friend.” I was not his friend, nor was I little. Height-wise. He did have a considerable amount of bulk on me. And probably a few inches in the cock department. But still. Nothing that would constitute him calling me…me that .

I tried to ignore my arousal, but found that impossible. Especially when Alex’s fingers curled around my shoulders, thick and strong, and steady. In a dominating way that made me feel like a melted pile of goo, he steered me away from Lacey’s minivan of death, and marched me across the street to his car .

I didn’t dare say anything biting, worried about causing another scene. The last thing I needed was to embarrass my mom again. Once was enough.

It felt like everyone was watching us.

Maybe because they were.

Juniper was halfway out the front door of Roderick’s house. She paused, not at all subtle when she gave Alex a thumbs up, and then aimed one toward Roderick in the back seat of the van. My mother, who had just strolled onto our porch in a floor-length, bright red, monster of a dress, smiled smugly when she saw who had abducted me.

Saboteurs.

Saboteurs everywhere.

“What did I do to make your sister hate me so much?” I whined under my breath. Alex’s throaty chuckle sent a shiver down my spine.

“I wonder that myself every fucking day.”

Alex drove a black Mercedes. Which did not surprise me in the slightest. The paint was shiny and recently waxed. In comparison, how well-maintained his vehicle was made Lacey’s van look like it’d been pulled right out of a junkyard.

This car was all sleek lines and paint so new it was practically a mirror.

“Do I really have to do this?” I grumbled as one of his hands slid to the nape of my neck. Collared, I had no choice but to stumble—then melt.

“Yep.” Unrepentant as ever, Alex’s voice crackled with heat.

I heard a clicking sound, felt a bit of wind, but was too distracted by the palm holding me steady to do more than breathe.

“In you go,” Alex urged, using his grip on my neck to gently push me down into the passenger seat. Leather. Real leather. The smell tickled my nose. Surreptitiously, I sucked in a deep, greedy lungful. Alex’s car was as ridiculously good-looking as he was.

The thing probably cost the same as a small country, judging by all the dials and buttons it had.

Across the street, my sister, Lacey, eyed us with interest. She was climbing into the front seat of her minivan with Mavis’s unicorn backpack tucked protectively in her arms. The only member of my family that wasn’t actively torturing me.

Thank god.

Alex opened his door, having crossed behind the vehicle. I mouthed help Lacey’s way. I even widened my eyes to show how dire the situation was. But she didn’t immediately jump to my rescue. Instead, my no-nonsense, asshole fast-track-to-district-attorney sister’s lips pulled into a smirk. And then she turned to face the garage and completely ignored me.

Traitor .

When Alex slid into his seat I had no choice but to accept my fate. His door shut with a resounding click. I shrank, glaring at him through my lashes—aware that I was well and truly stuck.

He smiled at me.

It was a sweet smile.

Softer than the ones yesterday.

I didn’t trust it one bit.

Not.

One.

Bit.

The nice thing about riding with Alex? I was sitting in the front seat. The not-so-nice thing about riding with Alex? I was sitting in the front seat. Which made it very difficult to ignore him.

I was a mess of jumbled up feelings.

Did I find Alex attractive? Yes.

Had he saved me from immense embarrassment? Yes.

Had he taken the heat off of me yesterday, going so far as to outright find my mom and “make things right”? Yes.

All of those things normally would’ve made me more inclined to like him. But nothing about this situation was normal.

My saving grace was the fact that Alex’s particular brand of playful teasing never slipped into a category that was actually abusive. I’d had ample time to reflect on yesterday's events. Without the hurt clouding my judgment, I’d come to the conclusion that the only time Alex had come close to crossing that line had been at the barbecue when he’d brought up Neil—and even then, he’d been careful not to speak openly enough to cause me real embarrassment.

Even his provocation was mindful.

I wasn’t sure if that was another manipulation or not. Truthfully, I didn’t know what to make of him. The fact he’d spoken to my mother in itself was unexpected. Brendon would’ve never done something like that. Ever. Aside from the odd hot-and-cold behavior he’d exhibited yesterday, nothing about Alex reminded me of Brendon.

I knew logically, I should dislike Alex—and part of me did. Simply because I had not accounted for his presence when I’d taken off work to visit. He was throwing a wrench in my plans. Which was something I had always hated.

However…

I could tell he wasn’t totally awful.

And objectively speaking, I could understand why my family—and his—were trying to push us together. On paper we were compatible. Not to mention that neck grabby thing that he’d done to get me in the car had been… fuck . My skin was still tingling from it. In a good way.

“So…” Alex started as he pulled out onto the street. I truly had no idea what was about to come out of his mouth. Nothing good. The CD player kicked on, a song beginning to play that sounded kind of like one of the musicals I loved. Alex quickly hit the off button. “You and Roddy, huh?”

I sighed, frustrated that I had no choice but to respond. “A long time ago.”

“High school?” he asked, arching a brow .

“Briefly.” I could tell he was going to keep pushing, so I figured I might as well go ahead and tell him to save us both the headache. “We were never all that compatible.” Alex made a sound, and I continued. “When I went away for college it seemed logical to end things. We knew it wasn’t working. The breakup was amicable.”

“Did you love him?” Alex’s voice was subdued.

“I’ve loved everyone I’ve dated,” I replied.

“Huh.” I’d never seen Alex’s face look so broody. Alex gathered his thoughts and I soaked up the sun that hopped between the trees planted along the road. Almost perfectly spaced. Shadow, light, shadow, light. “I’ve only loved one person,” Alex confessed. “Romantically,” he added, as though that hadn’t been clear.

“And did it end amicably?” I inquired, honestly curious.

“No.”

Now it was my turn to stew. I wasn’t sure why we were having this conversation at all. But as I glanced through my lashes Alex’s way I couldn’t help but come to the conclusion that he was…maybe possibly as damaged as I was. At least, if what he’d just said was true, and the expression on his face wasn’t fake.

“What happened?” I knew I shouldn’t ask. I certainly didn’t want him prying into my private business. I could only assume that feeling was mutual. We were strangers. But…well. He looked…

He looked sad .

A furrow between his brows, his lips pressed into an unyielding line. The muscle at the corner of his jaw jumped as he clenched it tight. “He was a liar,” Alex said simply. It was a small admission, but it was enough.

Immediately, I thought of Brendon. Of his dark eyes. His brown hair. Of the smile he’d given me every time he’d told me soon, soon, soon .

Soon we’d go public with our relationship.

Soon we’d move in together.

Soon we’d get a dog .

Soon we’d start our family.

Soon.

“Liars are the worst kind of people,” I agreed, bile climbing up my throat. It seemed Alex and I had found some common ground at last.

“I’d drink to that, but I’m driving,” Alex laughed, some of his usual cheer back already. “And I?—”

“Don’t have a drink,” I finished for him, because he was nothing if not predictable.

“Cute,” Alex’s lips curled into a smirk. I shrugged, ducking my head to gaze out the window again. The seat was soft. The leather clung to my ass in a way that was somewhat erotic—and should not at all be the design of a vehicle. It was slutty. Just like his t-shirt had been yesterday. Just like his Armani suit.

“Ha, ha.”

We were silent for a few minutes. Out of Chesterton and on the road toward our destination, it was easier to breathe. It was only one car ride. I could survive one car ride. Wasn’t like it was going to be a life-altering experience.

I didn’t hate Alex anymore.

But that didn’t mean I wanted to chat.

“George—“ Alex said.

“The small talk is unnecessary,” I cut him off. “Let’s get this over with.” I’d been a smidge…harsh yesterday when I’d told him I didn’t want to talk to him again. But still. It was beneficial for all of us if I stuck to that. It would minimize potential contention.

“Right.” Alex was quiet for another minute, hands flexing on the steering wheel.

I couldn’t help but stare.

They were lovely hands.

I’d thought so before.

His knuckles turned white from tension, the sound of his breaths coming a little faster, a little louder. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say he was nervous. Clench, clench, the veins on the top of his hands rippled as he squeezed.

“I…” Alex started, then stopped. He made a frustrated noise as he glared at the road. The trees that dotted the edge of the street grew wider apart as we drove. Soon enough, they’d disappear entirely, replaced by farmland once again.

I waited for him to finish his thought, but he didn’t.

Squeeze, squeeze, Alex continued to strangle the steering wheel.

Up ahead, the “Hell is Real” sign came into view. Black and white, it’d been a landmark that’d reminded me I was home for most of my life. Growing bigger by the second, I waited for the words to blur as we sped by. But they didn’t. Because instead of continuing toward our destination Alex slowed down. I frowned, turning to look at him as he pulled over onto the side of the road, wheels crunching on gravel.

“What the fuck?” I managed as he got out of the car. Concerned, I watched him stalk around the back to the trunk. Had we hit a nail or something and I hadn’t noticed? Was he fixing a tire?

Why was he?—

The trunk closed, revealing Alex once more, holding… pickles?

A giant jar of pickles.

When he rounded the vehicle to my side and pulled the door open, I wasn’t sure what I expected. To be kicked out? Told to walk because I hadn’t wanted to chat with him? To be beaten over the head with the jar and tossed into the corn?

“Here,” Alex said instead of murdering me.

His chest was heaving, shallow little pants as he shoved the jar of pickles toward me. I took them, bewildered.

“You…stopped us on the side of the road…to give me pickles ?”

Alex looked panicked.

It was the most unsure I’d seen him yet.

“They’re…um.” He scratched the back of his neck, big shoulders flexing in a way that was far too distracting than it had any right to be. “They’re apology pi ckles.”

“Apology…pickles…” I echoed, staring down at the jar. It was the brand I favored. My favorite. The same kind I’d lost my appetite for the night before. “I’m confused.”

“Because I was a dick yesterday,” Alex tried to explain. “Words didn’t feel like enough. I wanted to show you that I’m not an asshole.” The more he spoke, the faster his words came out. “I wracked my brain all night trying to figure out the best way to do that.”

He’d worried about this all night?

“After talking to your mom I figured this was the best way to prove my sincerity.”

“With… pickles? ” I confirmed. The glass was cool to the touch, slightly warmer where the wrapper lay. I rubbed the edge with my thumb, so confused by this new turn of events, it took me a second to realize my anxiety had fled.

Laughter bubbled up.

The horrible kind.

The kind that made me feel like I was choking. It spilled free, these awful wheezes escaping as I clutched my apology pickles close.

Alex was startled at first, his eyes wide, like he didn’t know what to do. Then his unease melted away, broad shoulders relaxing. He cracked a smile. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think he looked proud of himself.

When I finally stopped choking on air, I wiped tears away from the corners of my eyes and shook my head. “This has got to be the stupidest, sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me,” I told him. “Apology pickles. Wow. Just… wow. ”

Alex grinned, wide and unrepentant. The sun glazed him in gold, highlighting the bump on the bridge of his nose, and the curve of his jaw. “I’m glad you liked it.”

I shrugged. “Hard not to like pickles.”

Alex laughed, this elated, sharp burst of breath. Then he sobered. He was nowhere near as rigid as he’d been previously, however. Just stiff enough I knew to expect another wild card. Proving me right, Alex dropped to his knees on the gravel in my open doorway. The car continued to run, and I held tighter to my pickle bottle.

“I was an asshole,” Alex said softly, holding his hands palms up. It was a sign of surrender. The same gesture he’d made the day before when I’d rejected him.

“Mmm,” I agreed, because he had been. “I was too.”

“I was worse,” Alex replied. “I…” He sucked in a breath, and then, because he was full of surprises today, he was honest. “You’re the fourth person June has tried to set me up with for her damn wedding. I’m not looking for a relationship. Not fucking interested. I was…frustrated that she was pushing this on me, prepared to treat you the same way I’ve treated all the people she’s tried to make me date.” He paused, refusing to look at me. “But then I met you.”

I arched a brow.

“You didn’t like me.” Alex’s voice caught. “I…fuck. This is hard. I don’t normally talk openly like this.”

“Why do it now?”

“I want to make things right.”

Another pause.

“I’m used to everyone liking me.” Alex grimaced. “I know how that sounds. But it’s true. I’ve been…a mess since yesterday. Not sure how to talk to you, or…what I even wanted. To push you away? Get June to stop setting me up? Or to feed into this…because you weren’t at all what I expected. This is the first time I’ve been even remotely interested in one of her matches and that was fucking with my head a bit, all things considered.” He took in another breath. “I shouldn’t have ignored you at the party. I shouldn’t have pushed you when you were clearly uncomfortable.”

My heart skipped a beat.

“I should’ve left you alone when you told me you wanted me to,” Alex added, staring at the pickles in my grip. “But…I figured you deserved answers. I didn’t want things to be weird between us. Didn’t want to ruin more of your trip,” Alex murmured, turning his pale blue eyes on me. Puppy eyes. Again.

“Okay?” My voice was oddly soft.

It was hard to process everything he’d just said but I tried. Maybe he wasn’t manipulative like I’d thought. Maybe Alex was simply off-kilter? I could understand that. I didn’t know what to make of him either. Maybe I’d misjudged him.

Alex’s smile was sad. “I really am sorry, George. Seriously, genuinely sorry. And I swear if you forgive me—even though I know I don’t deserve it—I will make it up to you. I’ll be honest from here on out. I won’t play games anymore. Not with you, and not with myself. As crazy as it sounds…I think we’re kindred spirits.”

I’d forgiven him the moment he’d brought out the goddamn pickles. His explanation was nice though, and appreciated. No one, in all my life, had ever apologized to me so sincerely. And so…endearingly pathetically? Like a kicked puppy. And like he really, actually cared what I thought.

What a trip.

“You were flirting with me as a joke?” I confirmed, because he hadn’t addressed that. “Because I didn’t like you, and you thought it was funny.”

“ No .” Alex shook his head. “The flirting was all real. It was the…other shit that wasn’t.”

“Huh.”

I frowned, processing this.

“So, do you—” Alex bit his lip.

“I forgive you.”

He sagged, giant frame collapsing forward. The rocks had to be digging into his knees, but he didn’t seem to notice. “Thank god.”

“I don’t know why you care,” I said, pickles still clutched close.

“Honestly? I don’t either.” Alex reached a hand out, hovering it over my knee before retracting it. “All I know is the idea that you might hate me makes me sick to my stomach.”

“I don’t hate you,” I reassured. Maybe I had, a little, but it’d been fleeting and before the puppy eyes.

“Yeah?” I swear to god if he’d had a tail it’d be wagging.

“You gave me pickles.”

“I did.”

“You’re hurting my knees just looking at you,” I grimaced. “Please get off the ground.” Alex was on his feet before I could blink, blocking the sun again. He smiled down at me, golden and sweaty.

I didn’t understand why he would flirt with me when he wasn’t looking for a relationship. Maybe he found it fun? Like a psychopath. I suppose it didn’t really matter. It wasn’t like I was looking either.

Alex shut my door for me, jogged around the back of the car, then slid into his seat. I studied the “Hell is Real” sign thoughtfully, deciding what to do now that we’d reached a tentative truce.

“It wasn’t that I didn’t…like you,” I confessed.

Alex’s presence alone made the inside of the car several degrees hotter.

He let the AC blast, but made no move to pull back onto the road. Twisting to look at me, his eyes were swimming with intelligence. Every ounce of his focus was on me. It made me feel bare, and I wasn’t sure how to react to that.

“I’ve just…never been treated that way. And I was…embarrassed. For obvious reasons,” I said.

Alex made a soft sound. “Treated what way?”

I rolled my eyes, self-conscious. I glowered at the cornfields outside the window. “You wouldn’t stop paying attention to me. Flirting with me. It was confusing.”

“Confusing how?”

“I’ve never…experienced that.”

“You’ve never been flirted with?” Alex sounded appalled. I hummed noncommittally .

“My recent ex wasn’t particularly…open with his affections.” That was the understatement of the century. “We were together for a very long time.”

“He didn’t pay attention to you?” Alex’s voice was full of disbelief. “How is that possible? Have you seen your legs? And your face?”

I flushed.

“He wasn’t like you. His affection was difficult to earn, and only offered behind closed doors.” I picked at the label on the pickles as I spoke. The pit in my stomach returned. “You saw my…Neil, and you continued to talk to me. I thought you were making fun of me.”

“Fuck no.” Alex sounded so adorably angry, I had to turn to look at him. He looked pissed off on my behalf, which was…flattering. “I mean, yeah, it’s a pretty wild choice—to bring a dildo on a?—”

“I didn’t.”

“You didn’t?” He blinked. “But you?—”

“My roommate packed it. Not me.”

“Oh. Well. That makes sense.” Alex’s smile was apologetic. “No offense, but you give off a kind of sexually repressed vibe. If I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes, I never would’ve believed you’d bring a sex toy with you like that.” His smile morphed into a grin. “So, what? She snuck it in there without you knowing? Won’t she miss it?”

I gagged. “It’s not hers.”

Sexually repressed?

I’d bet anything I’d practiced more kink than he had.

“So it’s…” Alex blinked. “So it is yours?”

“I never said it wasn’t. I only said that I wasn’t the one who packed it.”

“Right.” He nodded up and down. His eyes were on my body. My chest, then my hips. His pink tongue flickered out to wet his lip. “And you…use it?” His hands twitched, almost like he wanted to reach out to measure my waist—to see if someone as slight in frame as I was could really fit a cock that big inside.

“That’s a very inappropriate question,” I admonished, cheeks hot .

“Right, sorry. I’m just…” Alex inhaled sharply. “ Fuck .” He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to redirect his thoughts, probably. Horny bastard. His lips were still slick, and they looked…even more kissable like this, when he wasn’t smirking and smarming and taunting.

Honesty was a good look on him.

“Suffice to say,” I mirrored his earlier words. “I didn’t know what to do with you. Being wanted is unfamiliar.”

“That’s a shame,” Alex said, eyes opening again, his pupils flooded black. “A serious shame.”

I shrugged. “I’m used to it.”

“So, you’ve never had a boyfriend who showered you with affection?” Alex echoed, finally putting his hands back on the steering wheel. “A guy who couldn’t keep his hands off you, no matter how hard he tried?” He shifted gears, pulling out onto the road. It was a relief not to hold the entirety of his attention any longer.

“Never.”

“Not even Roddy?” Alex said.

I quirked a brow. “We weren’t like that.”

“Right.” He shifted in his seat, chewing over our conversation as the world blurred by. It was too hot, so I reached over, pointing the cool air my way. The pickles jostled, but I managed to keep them from falling to the floor. “Would you…want that?” Alex asked, voice uncharacteristically breathless.

“Want what?” I inquired.

“A boyfriend who showered you with affection,” Alex clarified.

I paused with my fiddling. Now it was my turn to chew over his words. Scowling, I settled back in my seat. “I…” Imagining that hurt. Someone to love. To care for me openly. To be proud to parade me around. To touch and hold and pamper me. Someone who thought I was enough. “I would.”

“Okay.” This silence dragged on longer. I didn’t interrupt, certain there was a purpose to it. Alex’s expression was contemplative as he watched the road with unseeing eyes. We passed over a railroad track, wheels thunk, thunking.

“ Okay ,” Alex said again, a bit louder, like there hadn’t been a pause at all. “I have a proposition for you. And it’s going to sound unhinged?—”

His expression softened as he glanced my way.

My heart rattled in my chest.

“How would you feel about a practice boyfriend?”