Page 30

Having Alex on his knees for me felt like a religious experience. Earth-shattering. Not because of the action itself, but because of the control he was handing to me. Control that, I suspected, was another of his masks.

His pale blue eyes were somehow even more impossibly gorgeous while peering up at me from below—and for a second, all I could do was breathe .

I was so overwhelmed by the weight of his surrender.

I’d never been offered something like this before. My inexperience was intimidating—but it was also exhilarating . This was a chance to be someone I’d never been allowed to be. A pivotal moment. And the offer of a new…kind of intimacy.

I wasn’t afraid of it.

Not with him.

Alex wouldn’t become angry with me if I fumbled. He wouldn’t yell or ignore me. He wouldn’t ice me out .

If I made a mistake, we’d figure out how to fix it together.

There was no “failing” when I was in bed with him. I couldn’t imagine myself ever feeling this comfortable with anyone else—as preposterous as that sounded.

I shouldn’t trust him so much, he was practically a stranger, and I knew that.

And yet…when Alex was around, all logic flew right out the window.

Bad decisions became good, simply because they meant I’d get to have more of him.

Grounding myself, I closed my eyes.

I let the scene wash over me.

The faucet dripped. Outside, the world was silent—the sound-proofing in here was frankly impressive, all things considered. All I could hear was the woosh of both our breath, and the way my own heartbeat tripped in my chest, as eager to get this right as I was. I nearly strangled the bottle of lube in my hand.

“I’m not sure what to say,” I said, honestly, eyes still shut.

Normally, it was difficult to admit weakness.

But not here.

Not with him.

“I want this, but I…don’t know how to do it.”

“Just do and say what feels right,” Alex reassured. “I promise I’ll like it.”

“What if I sound silly?”

“You won’t.”

Comforted, my free hand found its way blindly into Alex’s hair.

It was as thick and soft as it looked—slightly damp from the summer heat, a reminder that as perfect as he seemed, he was human. He’d never gotten it wet down by the lake so it was untangled. Almost buttery smooth to the touch.

Alex didn’t pull away, so I gripped his hair tighter, curious to see what he’d do. Testing the waters, so to speak. Alex made a sound and tipped into my touch—just a little—enough to send all the blood in my body rushing south .

When I spoke again, my voice was more steady.

“Do you want to fuck me, Alex?”

“ Yes .” Alex’s answer was a growl—gravelly and soft.

I opened my eyes—and Christ , he was a vision. Dark hair clutched between my pale fingers, colors in stark contrast. Peering up at me obediently, awaiting orders like the eager puppy I’d said he was.

I liked this way too much.

I almost said okay—like a total idiot—but caught myself before I could hand over the reins prematurely.

“I want you to get my cock out.” Voice both breathy and firm—I attempted to sound in control. Though my face and voice were behaving, my dick was not. It twitched, steadily filling and betraying my interest.

Without doing as he was told, Alex pressed his face into my crotch.

His nose skimmed up and down the length of my dick. Barely-there pressure, that made my skin buzz. Diving lower, he nuzzled my balls, inhaling hungrily. I was sweaty, half-tempted to shove him away—as contrary as that was, considering what I’d just told him to do.

But I didn’t.

Somehow I knew Alex wouldn’t mind a little sweat.

He didn’t speak.

But he didn’t have to.

The way he was sucking in breathfuls of my scent made it clear how pleased he was by our current position. His breath was hot, lips rubbing my sac through the fabric.

Misbehaving…misbehaving meant…I should…punish him, right?

Yes.

That made sense?—

The punishment I delivered was a sharp tug to his hair. Which wasn’t much of a punishment, because Alex looked completely unrepentant as he groaned. I yanked his head away from my dick, just a few inches. His big chest was heaving, this fucked-out hungry look in his eyes that was far less present than usual when we were together like this.

“Do as I say,” I chided.

The sound he made was even more pitiful than the last one. “Anything you want,” he promised, and I believed him. “Seriously. Anything .”

Immediately, he went for the hem of my shorts. The elastic gave beneath his fingers, sliding low on my hips as he yanked it down along with my underwear. My dick popped free, flushed and leaking at the tip, bobbing toward him.

My dick looked so small next to his hands. Barely the length of his thumb. Maybe not even that?

His hands framed my hips, tan skin scratchy soft as he fanned his fingers out to hold as much of me at once as possible. It was a lot of me—considering how much thicker, and broader he was. He kept his grip gentle, allowing me to continue to be in charge.

I bit my lip hard as Alex stared up at me.

He was waiting for his next command—only I was still so new to this that I wasn’t sure what to say next. Obviously, I should ask him to suck me. But…

Oh fuck.

There was a glint in his eyes that promised untold mischief if I wasn’t quick enough. And it was that chaotic energy—and its familiarity—that got me out of my own head.

“Open your…” I hesitated, mouth flooding with saliva. “Open your mouth.” My heartbeat was drumming in my throat, my fingertips, and my cock as Alex parted his lips. “Tongue out, please .”

It was polite to say please, wasn’t it?

Even in this situation?

“Yes, sir.” Alex taunted, before he stuck his tongue out as instructed. He wasn’t exactly… submissive so much as he was obedient—but I found I didn’t care. Semantics, and all that .

I watched his pink tongue wait, muscle trembling the longer we stood in silence.

He’d made me do this too. In a different setting, for a different reason. But the parallels were impossible to ignore.

This was the time to praise him, right?

That’s what I would’ve liked in his place.

“Um…” I stalled, cheeks burning as I debated how exactly to go about that. “Good boy, Alex.” His lips threatened to pull into a smile despite the way his tongue was out in the air. Like a switch had flipped, the mischief in his gaze settled. “That’s…very… good . You’re so…” With every word it became easier. “You’re so good for me.”

And he was.

So good.

“So good to me,” I added, because it was true. “So strong, and lovely, and caring. The best, most wonderful, most amazing man I’ve ever met.” It was true. It was all true. “You’re being so very good.” He was. “I am so…I am so grateful to you. This…”

Alex’s lashes fluttered, affection dancing in the depths of his gaze.

“This is such a gift. If your tongue starts to hurt you can put it back in,” I murmured softly, mind swimming. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

I had no doubt he’d ignore his own comfort for my sake at this point. I sucked in a breath, suddenly overcome with emotion as it truly hit me why exactly he’d pushed for this. That he might need it, the way I did. And that he…

He might have wished to teach me a lesson I desperately needed to understand, the best way he knew how.

Because it wasn’t until I was the one doling out orders and praise that I realized how easy it was to do so. How natural. How right. To take care of the person who relied on you. To…be kind to them. To watch them.

Experiencing Alex in his obedience made me want to cradle and protect him.

Not hurt him .

Not like Brendon had hurt me.

What was it about me that had ensured Brendon did not feel this…protectiveness? This desire to care, and covet, and please? Was it truly my fault? Was I lacking some important, essential component?

No.

Something clicked inside me. A cog. Tiny, mechanical. Fixing itself. Part of a door that’d been wedged shut for long enough I’d forgotten it could open. My systems fired, running smoother than they had in years—thoughts swirling, heart warming—memories…so many memories, climbing to the surface.

No.

Maybe Brendon was the one who was broken, not me.

I really had deserved better.

Was that…what Alex had been trying to teach me through this?

Staring down at his quivering tongue, at his pale, needy eyes—at the way he gave himself to me, trusting me to care for him—all I felt was an immense desire to keep him safe.

“George,” Alex’s tongue went back inside his mouth. “You okay, baby?” His voice was soft, breaking through the fog in my brain. I had no idea how long I’d been observing him—a long time probably. Simply holding his hair and ogling his tongue as my world came crashing down.

Even while on his knees, Alex was watching out for me.

“I’m good,” I promised—and suddenly I was. The shadows of my past fled as quickly as they’d come. I sucked in a breath, a weight on my chest I’d hardly noticed was there, gone with them. “Color?”

“Green,” Alex’s lips twisted into a smirk.

I put the bottle of lube in the shower caddy behind me before refocusing my attention on him.

“Tongue out again, Alex,” I whispered, steadier this time. “Round two.” Apparently, he sensed the difference in my speech too, because he straightened and his blue eyes went foggy soft .

Out his tongue went, pink and inviting.

I was forced to spread my legs so that I could sink low enough he could reach. The shuffle slide of my feet on the tile was as awkward as it was tantalizing. Alex’s breath ghosted over the tip of my cock as I lined us up. Aiming at his open mouth, I guided the crown onto his extended tongue. The first rub of wet heat made my head drop down, hips threatening to snap forward of their own accord.

I was supposed to be in control.

This was my chance to be in control.

But I’d been teased, and prodded, and taunted all night long. I’d had my dick groped, my nipples sucked, my hole rubbed. I’d had Alex’s tongue so far down my throat that I felt empty without it. I’d breathed his air for hours, tasted where his cologne clung to his throat, I’d grown intimately familiar with how slick his fingers could become if he massaged my slit long enough. Therefore—I figured it was only fair that I cut myself some slack.

It was natural to be overwhelmed when the entire night had been foreplay.

“Fuck yes,” I gasped out, shoving an inch inside without preamble. As soon as I’d given myself the grace to take what I wanted, the pressure lifted. “God, you’re so good . Hold still. I’m going to…” I pushed a little further, enjoying the way Alex’s tongue twitched beneath my length when I did so.

He was observing me, a look of longing in his gaze that was so powerful it made me feel like I could climb mountains. Who cared if I wasn’t the best at taking control? Who cared if this was a learning curve? Alex certainly didn’t and he was the person willingly submitting to me.

It was a choice he’d made.

I hadn’t had to intimidate him, or manipulate him, or force him. I had a big, confident, delicious man on his knees for me—simply because he desired to be there.

I’d never had a large dick. It was something that used to make me feel insecure, but…I’d learned to love it. Especially at times like this, when all it to ok was a steady thrust and my length was entirely enveloped in tight-hot-wet—and Alex didn’t have to struggle whatsoever to take me in.

He blinked, swallowing around me, and I whined.

Out, in. My hands tightened in his hair as I fucked the slippery glide of his tongue.

“Harder,” I commanded, curled over his head with another snap. Alex slurped, the sound lewd in the quiet. “Again,” I said. “Again.”

Alex groaned, the vibration sending tingles down my spine as I humped his face. His nose pushed into my pubic bone, and I shuddered, forcing myself as deep as I could. He inhaled sharply and I felt it. Felt the whoosh of his breath out of his nose.

Close.

I was so fucking close.

Only made more so when I pulled out all of the way, dick slipping free only to skim against Alex’s cheek. He made a sound, this broken, needy thing. His eyes were dazed, like he’d fallen as deeply as I had into this.

“So good,” I murmured again, the praise spilling freely as I released his hair so I could rub my fingers across his glossy lips. “You feel so good, Alex.” Lips turning up sweetly, Alex’s eyes met mine.

He was hunting for approval—approval I gave freely. “So perfect.”

When I glanced down between Alex’s legs I shuddered. His dick was fighting against his pants, attempting to poke through the fabric. Rock hard and swollen. I couldn’t help myself. I stepped out of my sneakers, kicking them out of the shower stall. Alex continued to stare, obediently waiting for his next command. There was no reaction whatsoever. At least…not until I lifted one socked foot and pressed it between his legs directly over his hard cock.

“ Fuck .” His voice was throaty-soft, lashes fluttering. Eagerly, his hips jumped up, grinding into my foot.

“You’re so hard, Alex ,” I purred, surprised by my own forwardness. “I bet it hurts, doesn’t it? ”

“ Yes ,” Alex agreed. His hands flexed at his sides, the tendons dancing.

“I bet this big,” I dug my toes into his crown, then jerked my foot down, “ thick , cock—” Alex folded over my foot with a gasp. “Wants a nice wet hole to fuck.” I’d almost called my own ass a pussy. Jesus Christ. He was rubbing off on me.

Ha!

Literally.

“ George .” Alex had never said my name like that. A grunt—a plea, all at once. “I need?—”

“I know what you need,” I said, skimming my toes down low to his balls. Reaching one hand out, I sought the wall for balance so I could trace the shape of him without fear of falling. “Spread wider.”

Alex did as he was told, shuffling his knees outward. The fabric of his joggers pulled tighter, making the shape of his hard dick even more prominent. He was delicious. Chest expanding with each choppy pant, t-shirt translucent as the muggy air in the shower made it cling to his sweat-damp skin. Even his nipples were hard, pressed against the white fabric.

“Good boy,” I murmured, flicking his balls lightly with my toes. He sobbed, dark brow pinching. “You like this?” I cooed, flattening my foot against his length again and giving it a liberal rub. “Needy as a fucking puppy.”

He’d mentioned wanting to try puppy play. I didn’t know much about that kink, but figured he hadn’t been entirely off the mark when he’d thought I’d like it too. Degrading him was just as fun as praising him—especially when his hips fucked up, and the pitiful look on his face made it clear he liked it.

“And you call me slutty,” I clucked my tongue. “When I know if I keep doing this.” Another rub, root to tip. “You’d come in less than five minutes. Humping my foot like a dog.”

“G-George,” Alex shuddered, hips rutting upward fruitlessly because I pulled my foot back with the motion, taking the pressure away. “Jesus fuck, you’re sexy when you’re mean. ”

His cock throbbed.

“Dogs can’t talk,” I told him, pressing down hard again just to soak in his responding growl.

“ Woof ,” Alex replied. I wasn’t sure if he was teasing me, or giving in. Either way, I rewarded him with another full rub. I even squeezed his crown between my toes at the end, just because I was magnanimous like that.

My own dick was throbbing, pointing right at him, fluid building at the tip. It was still shiny from his mouth—oh.

Yes.

His mouth!

“Open up, puppy,” I commanded, pressing into his dick with my foot, careful to keep my hips open enough that I could lean my pelvis toward him. “There you go—” Alex’s head sank forward, taking me inside his wet-hot-hot heat again. He made a slurping, sucking sound, and I rewarded him with a few sharp rubs to his massive, needy dick.

I could come like this.

I knew I could.

But…

Alex’s big blue eyes were black with need. The twitches of his hips were taunting me. And his cock—Jesus Christ, so fucking big—would feel even bigger when it was inside me. Thick, long, so satisfying. Twitching and throbbing, desperate to spill.

“ Okay .” I pulled my foot away. Alex sobbed around me, nearly nicking me with his teeth. I didn’t admonish him though, pressing my foot to his chest instead, right between his pecs. I forced him back with a push, his back arching to accommodate the motion. “You have a minute to get us naked and rinsed off or I’m leaving you here to jerk off alone.”

It was an empty threat, but Alex didn’t seem to realize that.

He jumped to his feet fast enough he stumbled.

Reaching out to steady him, my cock pulsed as he yanked his t-shirt and pants down in quick succession. He kicked them away just like I’d kicked my shoes. With all that gorgeous tan muscle on display it was difficult to decide where to look. His chest? Still expanding with each ragged breath. His flat belly, sucking in and out in jagged bursts. The V-cut that led to the dark riot of curls between his legs. Or his cock, long, veiny, and soaked with his own pre-cum. It leaned against his thigh as it throbbed and throbbed, begging for attention, foreskin pulled back to show the slightly lighter pink tip.

He truly was gorgeous.

And so far gone.

“Color?” I checked in, breathless.

“So fucking green, baby.” Alex’s hips jerked forward, rutting into the empty air like he was trying to fuck me before he’d even gotten inside my body.

We made quick work of my clothes too. And the shower. Rinsing off the lake water, the sweat from the day, and some of the fluids we’d already shared.

“Grab the lube,” I commanded when the shower turned off.

In a blink Alex was back, lube in hand, cap already open. “Slick up your fingers,” I directed. A thrill swooped through me as he did what he was told immediately. Apparently, Alex was an unrepentant tease—unless he thought it would delay his opportunity to fuck my ass. Then he was obedient as a lamb. “Good,” I said, watching his fingers become glossy with the slippery substance. “Now wrap them around your dick.”

“No—” Alex keened. “No, no.” His hand shook. “I want to—to you ?—”

Obviously he thought I was going to make him jerk off because he hadn’t cleaned us quick enough. I wasn’t that cruel.

“If you’re going to fuck me, you’ll need to get that big cock nice and wet,” I said. Alex immediately relaxed. “Don’t you want to put it in my?—”

“I want your pussy so bad,” Alex whined, circling his length and giving it a languorous rub. “Please, George.” He looked pathetic in the sexiest possible way, head tipped down, eyes beseeching. Like he really was my naughty puppy. “Let me breed you. I need it—I need—” His hand tightened to the point it nearly looked painful. “Need to fuck your cunt.”

Jesus Christ.

This man was going to kill me.

He really looked like he needed it too. Like he’d die if I didn’t let him stick his dick inside me and go to town.

“Here,” I held a hand out, and Alex immediately squirted lube on my fingers. “I’ll get myself ready for you.”

Alex whined again, squeezing his dick hard enough the tip looked nearly purple for a moment. His foreskin slid back as he yanked himself almost violently, like he couldn’t help it. If that was an indication of how hard he was going to fuck me, I really needed to be thorough with prep.

We both gasped in tandem when my now-slick fingers slid home inside my ass. It felt odd, the angle uncomfortable, but I didn’t mind. I was quick about it, bearing down and adding more fingers faster than was smart. But I just…

God.

Every time I saw his big hand slide up and down his cock, the heat inside me burned brighter.

When I was ready, it felt like a century had passed. Alex was fucking his fist now, and judging by the way his gaze hadn’t left the spot where my hand had disappeared behind my back, he was genuinely unaware. He looked drunk on this, a dark curl falling forward and sticking to his forehead, lips parted, eyes glassy.

“Such a good boy,” I sucked in a breath, three fingers sliding free. Glistening, I smeared them down his abs, tickling low till I could rub the mess around the dark curls at his base. Alex whimpered, the slippery slap of his hand rubbing up and down impossibly loud. “You ready for?—”

“Yes, yes, yes.” Alex squirted more lube onto his fingers and liberally spread it across his dick. “Please, please, please, please.”

I paused—just to tease.

And that pause apparently terrified Alex, because he began to beg. “Please, Georgie. I’ll be so good. I’ll be so, so good for you. I’ll be your best, best boy. Anything you want. Anything in the world—please just let me—I need to fuck you. I need it. I need you—I need, need, need?—”

Before he’d finished talking, I’d turned to face the wall, ass angled out.

“Have at it, big gu?—”

Alex’s cock was shoving into my ass before I could finish speaking.

It was my turn to sob.

Apparently, I’d pushed him past his limit. Alex wasn’t gentle or careful the way he normally was. An inch popped inside, then a second. All the while, his gasps of gratitude were hot on the back of my neck.

“Thank you,” he whimpered, rutting in another inch. “Thank you, Georgie.” Another. I bore down on him to ease the push-slide, and Alex howled. His hands found my hips, squeezing tight enough to leave real bruises this time as he shoved into me bit by bit. It hurt a smidge. I probably should’ve made him prep me with his giant ass fingers—to ease the stretch, but I hadn’t.

“So good,” I whimpered, spreading my legs wider to accommodate his width. It didn’t help. He was simply too big. “Jesus.”

Luckily, I enjoyed a bit of sting, and soon enough, even that faded.

Till all I could focus on was how very full I was, split wide on his cock.

“Such a good puppy,” I gasped. “Breeding your master.”

“Mnnn,” Alex gasped when he finally rutted the last of himself inside me. His pelvis ground against my ass, these greedy rubs that made it clear that as deep as he could go was apparently not deep enough. He wanted to fuck his way into my stomach, my heart, my throat. “Gonna knock you up, Georgie,” Alex threatened against my shoulder, faint enough I wasn’t sure he even meant for me to hear. “Gonna—knock you the fuck up.”

My hole squeezed and his teeth sank into the meat at my shoulder. It stung even more than his thick dick had. And I loved it. Loved it so much. Loved that I’d somehow pushed him into a head space where he was this uninhibited .

He’d never been this way when he was in charge.

Without his walls in place…Alex was far needier than he let on.

“So good,” Alex’s voice was muffled, his tongue rubbing my skin as his teeth sank deeper.

“Fuck me, baby,” I promised, lashes fluttering. “You can go hard—it’s okay. I know you need it. You’ve been so patient for me, haven’t you?”

Alex responded with another of those impossibly distracting hip grinds. Like he couldn’t fathom the idea of pulling out—even if it meant he’d get to fuck back in.

“It’s okay,” I said, reaching back to assist him. I needed to keep one arm on the wall to brace myself, otherwise I’d face-plant—but my free hand, luckily the un-bandaged one, found Alex’s hip. He made a desperate sound when I gripped the bone, forcing him out of me by a few inches with a sharp tug. “I’ll help you.”

“No, no, no,” Alex whimpered, too respectful to fight me even though I knew it would be easy for him to overpower me. “You said I could?—”

“It’s okay,” I said. “Just…shift back a bit, let me help.” When I’d gotten him to move till he was halfway free, I finally let go. “Now in,” I commanded. Alex didn’t need to be told twice. He snapped his hips forward with a brutality that forced a groan out of the both of us.

I didn’t have to demonstrate for him again.

Alex growled, starting up a pace that was unrelenting. Brutal thrusts that made my eyes roll back and my feet skid across the damp tile. I gripped the wall for balance, chest shoved into it as Alex went to fucking town on my ass.

He’d never been this uncontrolled before—and I loved it.

Loved that I’d brought him to this point, all animal instinct.

Even more, I loved how full I felt.

How needed I felt.

Split open, the clutch of my ass parting and spreading for the rough jerks of his hips. I was so stuffed it was all I could think about. The way Alex’s crown was slightly fatter than his base. The way it pounded directly into my prostate with every slap. So fucking delicious. Alex’s mouth dragged over my neck, my shoulders, leaving more bites, hickeys, and spit in his wake.

He didn’t speak again, too far gone to do anything but breed me the way I’d told him I wanted him to. He did make noises though. These hurt little sounds—grunts, and gasps, as he rutted into my hole like he was about to make good on his promise and knock me up.

“So good,” I gasped, my dick bouncing with every thrust.

At this rate, I was going to come untouched.

Stars swam behind my eyelids. My toes curled. My dick was leaking a trail of need against the wall. Chilly, but welcome pressed to my feverish skin. “That’s it, baby. Give it to me. I know you need to.”

Alex’s hand slid from my hip down my leg, and before I could process what was happening he’d folded my knee up, forcing me open wider. The new angle was even better than the last one had been, my entire weight wobbling on one leg as Alex’s hips jack-hammered against my ass.

So close.

I was so close—I just needed?—

And then he bit me. Hard. Hard enough I was almost certain it’d draw blood, his teeth sinking into the meat of my shoulder with a sharp sting. I came all over the wall, gasping and clenching down on him.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck—fuck this delicious fucking cunt,” Alex gasped out, breaking his silence as I spasmed around him. His hips continued to rut. Over and over and over, faster now—and then…he groaned , low and luxurious.

Wet heat spilled inside me, flooding my ass as Alex’s thrusts slowed.

He let my leg down, and I sank against the wall, chest to belly. The chill was a balm on my feverish skin. Alex kissed over the bite he’d left, lapping at it with apologetic swipes of his tongue. His hands massaged circles over the bruises on my hips, half apologetic, half appreciative. Afterward, they ducked inward, chasing the shower-damp crease at my groin, fingers tucked between my balls and upper thighs.

He didn’t seem to care that we’d both finished, or that his cum was going to start leaking out of me—he simply luxuriated in our shared pleasure. The steady swipes of Alex’s thumbs were explorative, running along my pubic hair and down my softening length as he wiggled his fingers lower, lower, possessively around my balls.

“Mine,” Alex’s voice was soft as one of his hands cupped my dick and the other snugged around my sac. To hear talkative, charismatic, “everything man” Alex, reduced to a caveman was erotic as hell.

“Mmm,” I murmured in agreement, so sucked up in his touches my mouth refused to work.

“ My tiny cock,” Alex gave it a squeeze, and I whined. “My balls.” He gave them a liberal rub. “My pussy.” The last word was punctuated by a needy flex of his hips, driving his softening dick deep again.

“Mmm,” I repeated, lips against the tile—germs be damned.

“My…” The hand that had been on my balls slid up my belly, my chest, and settled around my throat. He squeezed. “My Georgie .”

Those words were a promise as much as they were a declaration.

“Yours,” I agreed, without thinking too much about the words.

This was only sex, after all. It wasn’t like he really meant it.

I was supposed to give Alex aftercare. I’d made such a point to ask for that when he’d been the one in charge. And yet—here I was, basking in his touch and offering no praise or comfort of my own.

“You did so good,” I managed, though it was difficult. Far more difficult than it should have been. “Such a good?—”

“I wanna lick your hole,” Alex’s voice was right next to my ear. I shivered, my good-Dom-etiquette fleeing. Were we…were we not done? “Please,” Alex’s tongue flickered out to trace the shell of my ear. “Let me lick my cum out of your cunt.”

“Oh, Jesus Christ.” I shuddered like a total asshole. “But you…I mean—af tercare—I need?—”

“I’ll cuddle you when I’m done,” Alex promised.

“I meant that I need—to give you —” Oh god, why was this so difficult?

My words were wasted, Alex wasn’t listening.

That was made apparent when his cock slid out of my ass with a hiss from the both of us, and the protective weight he’d been at my back slid low to the ground. His breath was hot against the globes of my ass.

With little to no preamble, Alex’s tongue tickled the top of my crease. He rubbed it there imploringly, only a few inches above where I was twitchy and empty, as his hands gripped my ass cheeks and spread them wide. “Say I can,” Alex begged. “Give me permission—George. I need you to give me?—”

“Lick my pussy,” Oh god. The words were out before I could stop them. I hadn’t meant to say the word myself. Hearing him say it was one thing, but uttering it myself? Totally another. It was filthy. Taboo. Something I had barely even read in books, let alone thought I’d experience in real life.

“Thank you,” Alex’s tongue slid down. “ Thank you. ” And then he was sucking around my hole. My fists thumped the tile, lips skimming the surface. Alex ate ass like he kissed. Possessive, with no shyness whatsoever. He rubbed his tongue against the rim of my hole, chasing his own flavor inside it, coaxing it out with each, curled flick.

I convulsed, fingers slipping along the wall.

Now it was my turn to beg, because that was what I did—pleas falling from my lips as I arched my back and pushed into him.

Brendon hadn’t liked eating my ass.

He’d thought it was “dirty”.

Alex apparently did not share such qualms.

He was voracious about it. Long fat swipes, then needy little flicks. Like he was trying to coax my hole to open even more for him—even though it was already loose from his big, hot dick. “Thank you,” Alex breathed against my ass, his teeth lightly worrying the edge of my rim. Then he slid his tongue deep. It wriggled, and I sobbed—in particular when he did this scooping motion with it right after, pulling his own cum right out of my gaping ass.

If my dick hadn’t literally just spilled, I would’ve come again.

Alex ate my ass until there was nothing left inside it. And even then, he didn’t stop. Not until I had to reach back to push his head away weakly. My legs were so wobbly I was fairly certain if he didn’t stop trying to impregnate me with his tongue I was going to fall on my face.

“E-Enough,” I whimpered. “Sore.”

“Sore?” Alex’s voice was a pleased purr. “That’s good.” And then he did this frankly unhinged thing, and brought his hand up to lightly spank my hole. It stung, and I jolted.

“Jesus Christ.” I whined, unable to stop him because he was still holding my ass open with the other hand.

“God, you’re so pink back here,” Alex growled. “So fucking pretty. Wanna stick my dick right back in and go again.” He fingered my hole, and it attempted to close—to no avail. Finger slipping in easily, Alex located my prostate right away, and gave it a pointed rub.

“C-Can’t.” My hole squeezed around him and he made a pleased sound.

“ Fuck .” Alex pulled his finger free. I thought we were done, until his fingers came back—two this time—and he pushed them in.

“A-Alex.”

“Don’t pretend like you don’t like it.” Apparently, he was no longer foggy-brained and dick-drunk. Well… Actually, maybe he was still dick-drunk. “I’m just checking to make sure my pussy isn’t hurt.” And then a second later, “It isn’t.”

Thank god.

He took pity on me though, only teasing my prostate one more time to hear me gasp, before he slid free and rose to his feet.

My head was spinning, our roles reversed so effortlessly back to the way they normally were that I hardly noticed the change. Not until Alex had turned me around and my face was tucked against his shoulder. His big hands swiped up and down my back, fingers taking a minor detour to slip inside my ass on a couple glides south.

“You’re so pretty when you’re in charge,” Alex promised against my ear. “Such a pretty, pretty kitty.”

“Nng.” My response was lackluster at best but Alex didn’t seem to mind. It took every ounce of brain power I had, but I managed to sling my arms around him, squeezing tight. “You were so good,” I gasped, the words aching as they slipped free. “So perfect for me.”

Alex made a soft sound, melting around me like a giant, muscly blanket.

Apparently, even men as self-assured as Alex needed praise after intense scenes. It felt odd to voice the words I’d often ached to hear, but it was therapeutic too. Like it healed part of me that had been shriveled and full of cracks.

“You did so well,” I continued, stroking his muscular, solid back. “Thank you for giving me that.”

This felt…dare I say…equal?

Which was something I hadn’t known a relationship could be.

Alex kissed the top of my head, his hands mirroring mine as we embraced in the quiet, dark room. It was a perfect moment. Special. Full of eye-opening epiphanies, fun, and orgasms.

I was glad it was Alex here with me.

Glad to be learning what love meant from someone as precious as Alex James.

Fifteen minutes later, we were under the spray of the shower again. Neither of us spoke, but we didn’t need to. We took turns sudsing each other up and stepping beneath the spray, unhurried this time. Alex was maybe a little too thorough when it came to my ass—but I wasn’t complaining.

When we were finally dressed and clean—with the shower spotless and as innocent as it’d been when we’d entered—I knew with certainty that I was going to sleep well that night. Bugs be damned, woods be damned, impending trip back home to New York be damned .

Because Alex was by my side.

And when he was there, it was easy to forget that the world could be an ugly, scary place.