Page 18

CHAPTER 18

I nstead of feeling shy or even embarrassed that her breasts were on full display, Ava felt brave .

She suspected that it was because of how he looked at her, how his eyes had widened when she had pulled her chemise down her chest to expose her breasts. She watched as he swallowed hard.

He looked positively transfixed, as if he had just witnessed the most beautiful sight, and that pleased her.

“Hold both of them in your hands,” he rasped.

Ava obliged, cupping her breasts in her hands.

“Caress them slowly.”

She kneaded them gently instead, hearing his sharp intake of breath.

At first, Ava did it simply because she could tell that it excited him. However, as she traced her fingers over her nipples, a bolt of pleasure shot to her core.

“Now, pay attention to one breast at a time,” Edwin murmured. “Use both hands.”

Ava held her right breast with one hand while she played with her nipple, squeezing it between her thumb and forefinger. Warmth bloomed inside her as she felt wetness pool between her legs.

Her own touch excited her and yet scared her. She had never felt so alive, so whole. And yet the fact that he was watching her every move intently made her touch feel even more pleasurable.

Her breathing quickened, and her core started pulsing.

“Ah!” she moaned, lost in the ecstasy even as she struggled to keep her eyes open.

She squeezed her nipple again as she felt the pleasure grow.

“Did I tell you to do that?” Edwin asked.

Ava groaned in frustration. She slowed down and felt the pleasure ebb.

“Dip your hand into your drawers,” Edwin croaked.

Ava nodded. Without a word, she slid her left hand into her drawers and found her bud. It throbbed even before her fingers touched it.

“Touch yourself,” Edwin whispered.

With a tentative finger, Ava slowly rubbed her bud.

Pleasure shot through her. She had not expected the intense feeling that washed over her.

“Continue—you are doing great,” Edwin said thickly, his jaw tightening.

His praise was all Ava needed to continue pleasuring herself.

She pressed her finger on her sensitive bud. Her breath hitched. She continued to rub it, even when the pleasure mounted so quickly that she trembled.

“You have forgotten your breasts.” Edwin shook his head in disapproval.

Ava resumed squeezing her nipple between her thumb and forefinger while she rubbed her pulsating bud.

The pleasure mounted, and she thrust her hips. Soon enough, the world faded around her. All she was aware of was herself, perched on Edwin’s desk, pleasuring herself before her husband.

The last thing she saw before closing her eyes was Edwin’s hungry gaze.

Her hips bucked one final time, and her thighs pressed together, before shivers racked her whole body.

“Don’t stop touching yourself,” Edwin warned in a firm voice.

She kept playing with her nipple and rubbing her bud until she was spent and could no longer support her weight.

She slumped on the desk as she caught her breath. Her body was still trembling with the aftershocks of her climax, and her heart was beating fast and hard.

“Good,” she heard her husband murmur.

She opened her eyes to find him standing above her with a crooked smile on his face.

She propped herself up on her hands till she was sitting once again. However, this time, she caught a glimpse of the hard bulge straining against the fabric of his breeches.

“Your performance was impressive,” he said.

Ava beamed at his praise. “Is that so?”

“Indeed. But there are still certain things you could learn,” he said. “I suppose I might as well show you.”

In a flash, he had divested her of her chemise—with her help, of course—until she was sitting on his desk stark naked.

The wood felt cold against her skin, but her resolve did not waver. Not when her husband’s eyes were roving over her body as though she were a work of art.

“I have never seen you fully naked before,” Edwin breathed.

Instinctively, Ava covered her breasts with her arm. She suddenly felt shy. What was she thinking, baring herself so freely?

“Ava,” Edwin said as he caressed her cheeks, “your body is magnificent. You should never hide it.”

As though transfixed, Ava dropped her arm to her side.

She trusted him, and if he said her body was beautiful, then it must be.

She watched as his hands trailed down to her breasts, igniting every inch of her skin in their wake. He cupped them in his hands and rolled her nipples between his fingers.

She gasped, and he smiled triumphantly.

She was disappointed when he let go of her breasts. But then he moved down her body and stopped at her mound.

He lowered his face and inhaled deeply. She was confused as to why he would do this, but when he rose, he had a contented, glorious look on his face.

The next moment, he wrapped his lips around her nipple and sucked.

This was different. It felt different from when she had touched herself. It felt even more intimate, more thrilling. Her whole body came alive.

“Edwin,” she breathed.

She felt his fingers slide down her mound and circle her bud. However, he did not stop there. His fingers slid lower and found?—

“There it is,” he purred as he released her nipple, leaving her aching for more. “Wet and ready.”

He was right—she could feel the wetness dripping out of her.

He circled her entrance with his finger, spreading her wetness over her folds. He looked up at her before he returned to her breast, sucking on it as though it contained his sustenance.

She was only just getting used to his mouth on her breast again when he slid a finger inside her.

Ava tensed immediately and gasped.

In an instant, he withdrew his finger and released her breast. He looked down at her, concern etched on his face. “Are you hurt?”

Ava shook her head, grinning. “Quite the opposite.”

She slid one of her hands behind her and leaned back on it so that he could have better access to her body.

When his finger slipped inside her again, she was ready. She felt different—stretched yet full. And when he finally began to move his finger, she gripped the edge of the desk tightly.

His movements were slow— painfully slow. Yet it was deliberate, as though he wanted to take his time exploring every inch of her body.

He slid his fingers in and out of her in a consistent rhythm that she soon began to follow. She gyrated her hips, meeting his finger when he slipped in and withdrawing when he slipped out.

That familiar warmth bloomed again in her belly, but this time it was more intense.

He was still sucking on her nipple, and she could feel her body tingle all over, the pleasure overwhelming her.

His finger pumped faster, and she also quickened her pace. The faster she moved, the more intense her pleasure grew until her arm shook and ached. She had no choice but to hold on to him.

She moaned and whimpered, but he continued until she forgot everything except the feel of his mouth on her breast and his finger inside her.

Her hips bucked wildly, as though they had a mind of their own. And when her pleasure finally reached its peak, she felt her walls clench down on his finger.

Edwin withdrew his finger one final time and slipped it back in, and she ground her hips against it. The pleasure washed over her like a tidal wave. She had even stopped breathing for a second.

Her body trembled, and she felt him nip her nipple. That was her undoing.

She cried out loud.

The pleasure overtook her, consumed her, her breathing ragged and shallow. She clung to him until she was spent.

Edwin held on to her, and she felt him pepper kisses all over her hair and face. She was happy in his arms, at peace.

“Ava,” he whispered against her skin, “that was beautiful.”

Ava smiled weakly.

When he pulled away from her, she was overcome with emotions.

Even though she could not quite see all of his face, the crinkles at the corner of his eye told her he was smiling.

But at that moment, guessing what he was feeling was not enough for her. She needed to see him—to fully see him and know what he was feeling. She wanted to be able to read his face in the same way he could read hers.

Even though she had never felt as intimate with him as she did at that moment, she knew that with his mask always in place around her, she could never quite feel as close to him as she wanted to be.

So, she reached out her hand and gripped the edge of his mask.

“Ava!” he warned, his fingers clamping around her wrist.

Even though his grip was not tight or painful, and she could still pry the mask away if she wanted, she knew he did not approve.

Therefore, she let go, and he let go of her wrist too.

Something shifted between them at that moment. The mask was a wall between them, and as long as it was still up, her husband could never be plain and open with her.

He must have sensed the change because he leaned down and kissed her on the lips.

At first, Ava did not reciprocate. However, the harder he kissed her, the more she struggled to hold on to her resentment. And when he cupped the back of her neck and groaned into her mouth, the last thread of her resistance snapped, and she finally let him in.

She had only just begun to let go and enjoy the kiss when he suddenly pulled away.

“I know you are frustrated by my mask,” he murmured.

Ava nodded. “I am. I cannot help but feel like you are shutting me out.”

He shook his head. “Oh, Ava, I truly am not.”

“Then why won’t you let me see you? Truly see you.”

Edwin sighed before pulling back and sitting on his chair. “Come here.” He patted his lap.

Ava climbed off the desk and sat on his lap, still naked.

“I do not suppose I have told anyone this,” he began, “but I will tell you now.”

Ava studied him. His eyes seemed distant, and he had a pained look on his face.

“I left for the army when I was only a boy,” he said.

“That must have been quite hard on you,” Ava whispered.

“It was. In my first year, I watched a lot of boys like myself die in battle. No one cared that they died. If fifty boys died today, tomorrow we would return to the battlefield and continue fighting. Theo, William, Magnus, and I knew that every day we survived was nothing short of a miracle. We could well die and no one would lose sleep. We were only boys, but we had witnessed awful things.”

Ava was moved to tears. She could only imagine young Edwin carrying firearms and trying to stay alive.

“I earned several scars on the battlefield,” he continued. “There are several scars on my body and face, and I got them all while I fought for king and country. However, none of them was quite as deadly as the one that runs across my face down to my chin.”

He motioned to the side of his face that was covered with the mask.

“How did you get the scar?” she asked.

He winced at her question, and she instantly regretted it.

“You do not have to respond. I am truly sorry,” she murmured.

“No.” He rested a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “You have nothing to apologize for, I assure you.”

Ava sighed in relief.

“The memory is rather intense,” he admitted.

“Then you truly do not have to share it,” she assured him.

“No, I must,” he insisted. “I know you are bothered by the mask, and I want you to know the reason behind it.”

Ava nodded.

“I was part of a team that rescued a family that had been held captive by the Spanish army. We were only just returning the captives to our camp when they attacked.”

“Who? Your enemies?”

Edwin shook his head. “The captives. Unbeknownst to us, we had been tricked, and our enemies had been disguised as captives.”

Ava gasped in shock.

“We let down our guard, so we were caught off guard. Only a few of us carried weapons—I was lucky to be one of the few. The man who caused this scar…” He traced a finger across his mask. “He was wielding a sword and tried to cut off my head.”

Ava clamped a hand over her mouth to stifle another gasp. “That must have been terrifying.”

“It was. But back then, I was only happy to be sharp with my gun. I shot him in an instant, but I did not dodge his sword fast enough. He slashed my face as he went down.”

“Oh no!” Ava breathed, pressing her palm against his mask.

“I do not want you to pity me,” he warned.

“I don’t pity you. All I can think of is the immense strength you possess,” she said.

It was true. Only a brave man would return from such a battle and carry on living despite Society’s judgment. Maybe this was why he appeared so cold and emotionless.

“When I returned from the war, I was not expecting that my mask would make me a pariah.”

“You know how superficial the ton can be,” she responded.

“Indeed. It did not take me long to realize it, and I immediately got a mask to cover my terrifying face.”

“I assure you, your face is not terrifying,” she insisted.

“You say this now because you know me. Anyone from the ton who already thinks me a monster would be terrified if they saw me without my mask on.”

“And yet they are terrified of you even with the mask on.”

“I must confess something to you, though,” he whispered. Ava noticed that his face had softened. “I prefer it when people are terrified of me.”

Ava chuckled. “Why? You enjoy the terror on their faces?”

Edwin shook his head as a smile spread across his face. “Not quite. However, if people think me a monster, they would not bother accosting me with ridiculous chatter and gossip. They would simply let me be.”

Ava studied him. “So you prefer being feared?”

“Hmm…” Edwin considered for a moment. “I would not say that I prefer being feared,” he began. “However, I have found that it can be rather advantageous if everyone deemed me unapproachable.”

“Then I suppose I am grateful I ran into the unapproachable Duke in that dark passageway.”

“Why?” He looked genuinely confused.

“If I did not run into you, I would not be here right now, sitting naked on your lap, in your study. And as unlikely as it may seem, I prefer this to being back in my father’s home, wearing myself out without receiving an ounce of gratitude.”

Edwin smiled brightly. “You know I am grateful to you. How you care for me and my home. And this…” He made a show of raking his eyes over her naked body. “This is my way of showing my gratitude.”

Ava laughed. “Then I must work even harder and not be tardy so I can earn more of your gratitude,” she quipped, winking at him.

Edwin laughed even louder.

Ava’s heart swelled as she watched him. He was a far cry from the cold, emotionless man she had first met. As she watched him laugh at her words, his eyes closed and his head thrown back, she felt such intense affection for him.