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A fter flipping and flopping all night like a fish out of water, Chaz woke up grumpier than usual, his hip aching. With a curse, he dragged his old ass out of bed, used the bathroom and guzzled down an entire pot of coffee. He brewed it the old-fashioned way with his always dependable Mr. Coffee. Fuck k-cups. They were too expensive and barely drizzled out a quarter cup. Hell, he took bigger pisses.

Once the caffeine worked its magic and he felt awake, he wandered back into the bathroom, flipped the shower on and stepped beneath the spray. His special shampoo hadn’t arrived yet, and as he ran his fingers through his thinning hair, he frowned. Although he’d never had the fullest hair, he wasn’t ready to lose what he still had. Screw being bald. He’d go out fighting before giving up.

As the warm water streamed over his body, his thoughts inevitably drifted to the tiny blonde who fascinated him more than any other woman. How could anyone so tiny have such a big presence? She also had a heart the size of the ocean. He’d seen her kindness in action over and over again with her daughter and patrons at the bar.

Of course it wasn’t her heart his brain was focused on. His thoughts turned more heated as he contemplated all the dirty things he wanted to do to her. Wrapping a hand around his thick cock, he began stroking. Would it even fit inside her? He’d never dated much less fucked such a petite woman.

The idea of being deep inside her, seeing her hot, wet pussy stretched around his dick made him lose control fast. If just jerking off to the thought of being with her got him so worked up so fast, actually being with Lottie would be epic. With a feral growl, he blew, his release splattering on the tiles.

Leaning his forehead against the wall, he took several deep breaths, trying to get his raging desire under control. He’d never wanted anyone more in his life. Too bad there were a fuck ton of obstacles between them. For one, she was way too good for him. Not to mention she was sixteen years younger than him. Fuck, he could be her damn father.

Or her daddy , a little voice taunted.

Nope. He squashed that thought fast.

He was a nobody, the only offspring of an abrasive drunk and a woman far too good for him. His mom had done her best, but ended up working herself into an early grave. She’d been on her hands and knees, scrubbing the kitchen floor, when she’d keeled over from a heart attack. His worthless father had died of cirrhosis of the liver a few years earlier. Alone and unsure of what to do with his life, Chaz joined the Army.

Channeling all his energy into the training, he’d soared and excelled at every challenge. He was one of the select few invited to try out for Delta Force. Refusing to end up like his old man, he wanted to make a name for himself. To prove his worth.

The selection process was notoriously difficult, but he’d pushed himself through each grueling challenge, mentally and physically, and had been one of six elite operators invited to join a team.

They’d started with over eighty guys.

It was a proud moment, but he didn’t have anyone to share it with—at least no family. He grew close with his fellow military buddies and built an incredible career with CAG (Combat Applications Group) better known as Delta Force. Hunting down and eliminating bad guys came naturally to him. It gave him something to focus on, a purpose that called to him, and he quickly discovered he was damn good at thinking like the enemy. Because of that, along with his sheer determination to succeed, he was an incredible operator and asset to his team.

After returning from a particularly hard mission, he and his buddies went to their local haunt and got stinking drunk. He met Samantha that night and the alcohol convinced him he wanted a girlfriend. After only three months of dating, she began hinting about marriage by leaving bridal magazines everywhere and constantly complaining about how all her friends had engagement rings.

Yes, his friends were getting serious with women and it seemed like the next logical step, so he proposed. Mostly to get her off his back, but if he were being honest, a part of him wanted to fit in with his buddies. With no family left, Samantha and his friends were all he had. That part of him feared if he didn’t give her what she wanted, she’d leave and he’d be relegated to a loner.

Besides, that’s what you were supposed to do. Work, meet someone, date, get engaged, get married and start popping out kids.

Right?

It didn’t take him long to realize he’d made a mistake. Samantha was controlling and needy. So fucking needy. Chaz had warned her how demanding his job was and that it could be mentally and physically exhausting. Told her he could be gone for weeks at a time. She began to resent his time away and the moment he’d return, exhausted and needing peace and rest, she’d start harping on him to find a new job. Something that wouldn’t take him away from her for weeks on end.

He didn’t want to hear it. CAG had become his life. Without it, he had no idea who he was or what he’d do. It fulfilled him in a way nothing else did—including his wife. They argued constantly, growing more distant as the rift between them grew. The honest to God truth was he stopped missing her and began to dread coming home. Then one day he returned from an op and she’d betrayed him in the most humiliating and worst possible way.

Chaz wasn’t normally a hothead. He was strategic and methodical. But he’d lost his shit that day. Once he’d blown up, and subsequently regrouped, he quickly accepted the fact Samantha was a huge mistake and divorcing her was the best solution.

In hindsight, he wished they both would have handled things differently. He refused to waste his energy on hating her, knowing it had only been a matter of time before their marriage imploded.

Charlotte Russell was nothing like Samantha, though. She was the complete opposite in every single way. She was kind. She was accepting. She cared about people other than herself. And, yeah, she was far too good for him. Something he had to keep reminding himself when she came around spilling her sunshine.

After he got dressed, Chaz decided to take a walk. It was a gorgeous fall day, not overly warm, and the sun drew him out. Sure he didn’t put his body through the rigorous training he once did, but he still made sure to exercise. Hiking and lifting were his main ways of staying in shape.

Slipping his phone into his pocket, he locked up and started out on a brisk walk. After a few minutes, he realized he was heading toward the small park near Lottie’s apartment complex. Maybe it was intentional, but he didn’t want to think too hard about it. He’d run into her there on a few different occasions and they usually chatted. All very casual, of course, but it brightened his day so much. Secretly, he looked forward to seeing her there because it was away from the scrutiny and prying eyes of his buddies when they were at Old Glory.

When it was just him and Lottie, her daughter playing nearby, his world felt right.

His hopes high, he picked up his pace, and the moment the park came into sight, he saw her sitting on a bench watching Reya toddle around the playground area. Excitement pumped through him, and when Lottie looked up and gave him that adorable, little wave, he felt another chink crack in his armor.

“Hey, Sunshine,” he greeted, sitting down beside her on the bench. His nickname brought a flush of color to her cheeks. “Nice day out, huh?”

“Beautiful,” she agreed.

He glanced over at Reya who shared her mom’s same blonde curls and blue eyes, and was currently picking up rocks. “How’s the nugget?”

“Why don’t you ask her?”

“Hey, nugget, what’s happening down there in Munchkinland?”

Lottie chuckled, and when Reya saw Chaz, she came waddling over like a little duck. Her gait reminded him of someone who’d had one too many at Old Glory. Grabbing hold of his knee to steady herself, she looked up at him with those big aqua eyes…and damn if his chest didn’t tighten.

“Reya, say hi to Chaz.”

“Hi!” she exclaimed, not at all shy, curls bouncing around her chubby face. Then she extended her other hand and offered the rock she’d found. “For you.”

He turned his hand over and she placed the rock in his big palm. “Thank you.” She gave him another huge smile then toddled away.

“Once she’s not looking, feel free to throw it in File Six.”

“File Six?”

“Code name for the garbage,” she whispered. “I used to try to save everything she gave me, but it’s impossible. You have to prioritize. And rocks, leaves and half-eaten carrots are usually the first things to go.”

He chuckled, but kept the rock in his hand. For a minute, they both watched Reya entertain herself, but he couldn’t help notice the weary look on Lottie’s face.

“Everything okay?” he asked.

“Yes. Well, no.”

She had his full attention and he leaned forward. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m just having a bit of a dilemma.”

He hiked a brow. “What?”

“My mom has to go out of town to help a friend. I’m working tonight and have no one to watch Reya. I don’t think Brand wants a baby at the bar, so I’m going to have to call in. I hate to leave him hanging.”

“You could find a babysitter,” he suggested.

“I already asked my neighbor, but she’s busy.” She lifted her phone. “Hopefully he won’t be too upset.”

It was Saturday night and Chaz knew Old Glory would be hopping. Plus no work meant no tips, and he also knew how much losing out on that money could affect a single mom. A crazy idea hit him, something completely out of his comfort zone, but Lottie needed help and he could offer it.

“I’ll watch her,” he said before his logical side reminded him he knew less than nothing about kids.

“Really?” Surprise laced her voice. “I don’t want to put you out—”

“It’s fine.” He looked over at Reya having an animated conversation with no one. She was so little and harmless-looking. Besides, she’d probably be sleeping the entire time Lottie was at work. How hard could watching one nugget possibly be?

“Well…” Lottie looked from her daughter then to him, considering. “I really can’t afford to miss a shift. But only if you’re absolutely certain.”

“I’m certain,” he assured her.

“I can pay you—”

He shook his head.

“Your time is worth money,” she insisted.

“How about you pay me back in another way?” Fuck. The moment the words left his mouth, he inwardly cringed. Dammit, that sounded totally creepy.

Her blue eyes widened slightly.

“I meant like maybe cook me dinner or something,” he quickly amended. “Or cookies or… Never mind. It’s really fine, Lottie. You don’t have to do anything.”

His tongue seemed to get all tangled up. What he’d really wanted to say was maybe she could repay him by going out to dinner with him. But it hadn’t come out right and, honestly, being alone with Lottie too long probably wasn’t the best idea.

She’s off-limits, Madden.

“I can do that.” She gave him a megawatt smile that lit the cold, dark crevices of his soul. “Can you come over at 7:30?”

Yeah, he could do that. For Lottie, he could find a way to do anything. Especially if it got him that beautiful smile.

He nodded, completely caught up in her baby blues which seemed to sparkle more than usual.

Must be a trick of the sun , he told himself, pocketing the rock in his cargo pants.

◆◆◆

Chaz arrived promptly at half past seven and Lottie quickly gave him a tour of the small apartment. It was clean and cozy, but there wasn’t much to it. She deserved so much better. Hell, she should be living in a palace with hired help to wait on her hand and foot.

“Reya’s been fed, changed and I just put her down for bed. She should be asleep in less than fifteen minutes and I doubt you’ll hear a peep out of her all night.”

Chaz nodded, looking around Lottie’s domain, taking in the feminine details. Pillows, candles, a vase of dandelions on the coffee table and a basket full of baby toys.

“The baby monitor is on the coffee table. Please help yourself to anything and call me if you have any problems.”

He nodded again, breathing in the soft scent of flowers and baby powder.

“Thank you so much, Chaz. You have no idea how much I appreciate this.” Grabbing her purse, she paused and gave him that dazzling smile that did funny things to his insides. “Oh, and the tin of chocolate chip cookies on the counter is for you.”

For him? He couldn’t remember the last time a woman had made homemade cookies for him. Probably not since his mom, and that had been over thirty years ago. God knows Samantha never baked, and Chaz couldn’t even remember the last time he’d turned on his oven. Corey was the cook of the Motley Crew and used baking as a coping mechanism when he was depressed and struggling with bouts of PTSD.

“Thanks, Lottie.”

She turned to leave then hesitated. Looking shy, she said, “I remember hearing you say you liked coconut, so I added a little.”

Words stuck in his throat as emotion tightened it. Why had she remembered something like that? And then gone ahead and used that knowledge to do something so nice? His attention dropped to her pink glossy lips and his heart thumped harder. “Thanks,” he finally managed to rasp.

“I’ll be back a little after three.”

Her gaze shifted to the bedroom where Reya slept. “If she wakes up or gets fussy, you can read her a story.”

“Sure thing.”

“Um, I guess that’s it.” She hesitated again, face full of motherly worry.

“Stop worrying. I’ve snuck into enemy territory, neutralized terrorists and rescued hostages all in less than an hour. I think I can handle one sleeping toddler.” He lifted his phone. “And if the nugget gives me any trouble, I’ve got your number.”

She smiled. “I trust you.”

“I know.” And that meant the world to him. He didn’t exactly know why, but Lottie’s trust and faith in his ability to watch the most precious thing in her world, her daughter, meant absolutely everything. “I’ll guard her with my life.”

“I know,” she echoed.