Page 5 of Caught By the Chief of Staff
Rachel must have asked a thousand times tonight what was wrong. I’ve never been one of those moms who unburdens themselves at the expense of their child, so I told her everything was fine and we should enjoy the movie. Which, of course, she chose the movie about the dog that is reincarnated over and over to find their person, and every time the dog died, I only cried harder. I’m sure it was an outlet for the fact that my world is imploding just when it seemed like everything was finally on the right path, compounded by the fact that our dog died a little over a month ago and we still weren’t totally over it. But still, never trust a person who doesn’t cry during a dog movie.
We splurged and bought all the snacks, drinks, and hot dogs to eat during the movie. At one point, I was sobbing so hard that I shook the popcorn bucket and it rained buttered globs over our laps. Rachel thought my show of uncontrolled emotion was hilarious, so she started laughing. So of course I had to throw a handful of popcorn at her, which only made my beautiful girl laugh that much harder. Her laughter is like music to my ears and always contagious, so I started laughing too. That is, until the dog died again, and I started crying all over.
Finally, the movie was blessedly over, and I could go home and mourn a fictional dog. It was late by the time we made it back to our small home in New Jersey. When I decided to come home, I knew it was going to be to Jersey. New York is wonderful, but New Jersey is where I spent my formative years. This is where I wanted to raise my daughter. I hustled Rachel off to get ready for bed and tucked her in not long after. My girl isn’t one to dawdle. She’s always set her mind on something and seen it through right away, no matter how big or small the task. She’s a lot like her father in that regard.
Unfortunately, then I was left alone with my thoughts. Would he take her away from me? Could he cost me my business? Could Rick send me to jail? Would he? He was so angry—and rightfully so. I can’t help but wonder if he would feel the same way if he knew why. Would Rick still hate me? Or would he understand? But he can never know, because that would put us all at risk and void the sacrifices I made for all of us, to keep us safe—Rick included.
I must have paced the house for hours before finally deciding I couldn’t solve the world’s problems as they stood right now. The exhaustion of a full day topped with emotional upheaval finally sank in. I put on a pair of plaid pajama shorts and a tank top. I washed my face of all of my makeup and brushed my teeth before twisting my heavy mass of dark unruly curls on top of my head and slathering my hands and face with moisturizer. And then I curled into bed and finally, finally drifted off to sleep.
But not for long, because someone now pounds on my front door.
I grab the baseball bat I lean in the corner next to my bed and quietly creep down the hall. Everyone who knows me knows I have a young daughter, and they shouldn’t be waking up my house at two in the morning. The neighborhood Rachel and I live in is a quiet one, but it’s also not free from crime. This can only mean trouble has decided to darken my door.
I slide the lace curtain that covers the window in the front door back so I can peek at who is on the front step. Yep, I was right. Trouble is here and in the form of one angry ex-husband. I take a deep breath, flipping the locks on the door before pulling it open. Rick takes one look at me before he starts yelling.
“What the fuck are you doing?”
“I could ask the same of you,” I reply, raising an eyebrow. “What are you doing here in the middle of the night?”
“I could have been anyone, and you answer the door like that,” he says as he points to my attire.
“I looked out the window and saw it was you,” I answer, raising my hand that’s holding the old bat so he can see it. “Besides, I’m armed.”
“Are you out of your mind?” he snaps as he grabs for the bat, effectively knocking it out of my hands. “This isn’t going to protect you from someone like me.”
He leans into me as he issues his threat. He’s breathing hard, and so am I. We’re so close our noses are almost touching.
“Should I be afraid of you?” I ask softly. I raise an arm to touch him almost against my will. It’s as if the limb has a mind of its own, and it’s on Rick, as I lay it softly on his hard chest.
“You should be,” he says before he grabs me by the back of my neck and crushes his mouth to mine.
When we were together, Rick was a sweet and tender lover, and that man is clearly long gone. He used to touch me gently, reverently, and he always got me off, but it was nothing like this. He devours me without so much as a concern for anything else, his focus solely on me, and I would be lying if I said it didn’t turn me on.
He backs me up against the front door and presses his hard body against mine, and it feels like I can’t get close enough to him. I drive my fingers into his hair as he thrusts his tongue into my mouth and pull on the strands, making him growl.
Rick presses his palm flat against my stomach and skates it upward toward my breast. He molds my breast to his hand and squeezes it as he rocks his hips against mine. I want to wrap my legs around his waist and feel his hardness where I need it most, when he pinches my nipple between his thumb and index finger. I let out a whimper.
It’s been far too long since I was with a man—this man—and I feel like I’m on a runaway train. I just hope I don’t get caught under its wheels.
Rick drops his hand between my legs and dips a finger under the hem of my pajama shorts where he finds me wet and wanting. Oh how I want this man if just for one more time.
He pulls the front of my tank top down roughly to expose my breasts, and the material bunches up under them, lifting them up. He bites and licks his way down my neck, not stopping to soothe the sting as he goes, but it only ramps up how much I want him. Rick draws the hard tip of my breast into his mouth and sucks hard as his fingers pump in and out of my center. The combination of the slick slide of his fingers and the stinging nips at my breast has me gasping for breath.
Before I know it, Rick is shoving my sleep shorts down to the ground, and I’m stepping out of them. I hear the clank of his belt as he unbuckles it, and he unzips his slacks, freeing his hard length. His large hand is firm and strong on my thigh as he lifts it high on his waist.
And then he’s there.
He’s right there.
At the very center of me.
Slowly, ever so slowly, inch by inch, he enters me, he owns me, possesses me with a fierceness that before was just an echo of what this is now.
Rick lets out a groan as he fills me and drops his forehead to mine, closing his eyes. I force myself to keep my own eyes open and on his brutally handsome face. I know with aching clarity what it feels like to have everything one day, and it’s all taken away from you the next.
When he finally opens his dark eyes, they sear me where I stand wrapped up in him. He dips his mouth to mine and licks across the seam of my lips. I whimper and open underneath him, letting him lick inside.
And then he begins to move.