Page 45

“Well, so do you,” I returned. Our bodies angled at each other as if there were a possibility one of us might pull a weapon on the other.

“Aaagh!” I hollered, feeling as if steam were about to rush out of my ears.

Why did everything have to be so confusing?

I didn’t have time to be hung up on a woman right now.

My future was hanging by a thread. “You will all vote for me to leave so that I can get the fuck out of here! I am done with all of this!”

Everyone stared but Bexley, who had busied himself picking berries from the patch and placing them in the hammock of his shirt.

It felt good to let a bit of anger loose, so I continued.

“My life has fallen apart and I don’t even know who I am anymore.

” I typically wasn’t so vocal about my inner turmoil, but for some reason, I couldn’t shut up and the words kept falling from my mouth.

“I don’t want to hear your diagnosis about why you think I want to be loved or helpful,” I snapped at Anna.

“No one has my back, not truly.” This one was directed at Walter.

“I just want out of this hellhole!” Bexley mumbled something under his breath.

“Well, guess whose fault that is?” Anna said, stepping in front of me. The sun had begun to go down and the dark orange hues from the sky blanketed her face.

I don’t know what happened, but something came over me. I grabbed her and turned her around to face the others, tightening my forearm around her neck. “Everyone vote for me to leave, or I’ll snap her neck.”

Walter held Eletha back from charging me.

“He won’t,” he said calmly, glaring at me.

“Because one, he is a good man and even good men get confused sometimes. That’s what makes us real and authentic.

And two, because if he touches her or anything that belongs to her without her consent, I will personally kill him. ” His eyes darkened.

I held strong for another minute before my desperate anger turned to sadness and I dropped my hold on Anna, turning her to face me.

Horror washed over me at what I’d just done.

I didn’t even know who I was anymore. Was that from the itch or was that a part of me that I’d never known existed until I’d been pushed and pulled like this?

I was mortified. “I’m sorry, I would never have hurt you.

” I spoke the words directly to Anna with the utmost sincerity.

I never could have hurt her, but the fact that I’d even acted like that had me more shaken than if I’d actually hurt her. Who was I ?

She was furious. “You volunteered to come here. You chose to tie yourself to my sister. Your prejudice against this place and these people is causing your suffering. No one has your back and why would they? Your family caused two of us to be here and you don’t hear us bitching.

You are the decider of your life, so if you’re miserable, blame yourself. ”

Needing space from everyone, including myself, I walked off about twenty feet, sat on the ground, and leaned my back against a large ancient-looking tree.

‘Cal?’ I reached out in my mind. I needed to talk to her—I needed a friend.

‘You again,’ Mendax chimed in almost instantly. ‘Great.’

‘Where is Cal? I want to talk to her, now. Tell her to open her mind.’

‘Have you given her sister the pendant yet?’ he asked. I knew he was feeling me out for information for his wife, but I felt her sharp presence.

‘Cal? Talk to me.’

‘What’s wrong?’ she said. ‘You feel terrible. What are all of these feelings coming through the bond?’

‘Cal, I have something to tell you that’s going to change how you think of me.

’ The fact that I had been not only hiding that I was tied to her sister but that I was really starting to…

like her needed to be discussed. I didn’t know how she would react, and honestly, I’d been kind of surprised she hadn’t figured out the tie thing earlier.

‘I have something to tell you,’ she volleyed.

‘Let me go first, please. When I tied myself to you, it was only able to happen because of your sister’s magic.

Seelie royal fox shifters can only tie to Artemi as you know…

’ I waited to feel if I would sense when it clicked for her.

She remained silent and I was eager to continue. ‘Cal, I’m tied to Anna.’

‘What? How? Then how can we still talk through the tie?’

‘I don’t know for sure, but if I had to guess, it’s because I was using my magic when I tied to you and now that you possess my magic, there’s some residual connection that is letting us all talk where the tie once was. I don’t know; the Fates threw us a bone,’ I answered.

‘You are tied to Anna…my sister. Anna, who you think is an evil monster?’

I twisted my hands around a stick, breaking it as I leaned my head back against the tree. ‘I don’t think she’s a monster anymore… heathen, maybe’.

‘He just got aroused. Oh, disgusting, I felt it. He just got aroused talking about your sister,’ Mendax interjected like the snake that he was.

‘He did just get aroused! You did just get aroused! Aurelius!’ Cal screamed. ‘That’s my sister!’

My cheeks heated, growing a new shade of red the more I felt Cal and Mendax cringe.

‘All right, calm down.’ I rolled my eyes.

‘She is kind and gentle, fierce and brave all at once. Anyone would be attracted to her.’ I realized that even though this conversation was in my mind, my hands were moving and clenching as if I were talking to them in person.

It had attracted the attention of Anna, who walked over.

‘What does she look like, Eli? Do we look anything alike?’ Cal asked.

Mendax’s presence boomed from the back of my head, causing me to flinch and thoroughly confuse Anna. ‘Why, Calypso? Curious if he still finds you attractive?’ Mendax said with a flare of jealous rage in his undertones.

“Can I sit?” Anna asked, gesturing to the ground next to me. Without waiting for my response, she sat down and folded her hands in her lap.

‘What does she look like?’ Cal asked again.

I let my eyes inspect all of her unabashedly.

‘Her skin is smooth and glowing with hair that is brown, but more like the brown of a pine cone. She has a tiny line that’s as thin as a piece of hair that stays between her brows when she squints so frequently around me.

She has similar eyes to you, but they are shades darker blue. Her smile is--

“Why do you keep moving your mouth like that?” Anna asked .

I sucked my lips inside of my mouth not realizing that they had been moving. “I’m talking with Cal through the bond or tie…whatever it is. She wanted me to describe what you look like now.”

Her mouth fell open. “You’re talking to Caly right now?” She got to her knees and moved closer. “How is she? Tell her I’m here and that I say hi,” she said enthusiastically.

I remained silent as far as Anna could see. ‘She says hi, Cal. She’s in front of me right now.’

A snap of excitement ran through the bond. ‘Don’t get too excited, Caly,’ commanded Mendax.

My head smushed back, making the skin around my neck wrinkle. ‘Why was he talking to her like that?’

‘Oh my sun. Tell her I said hi, Cal said with excitement. Put your hand on her face. I want to feel her features as you feel them.’

“She says hi back,” I said to Anna. She smiled so wide, I could have counted all her teeth.

Anna grabbed my arm and moved so close she was almost on my lap. “I-I can’t believe I’m talking to Calypso,” she said in awe. “Is she saying anything?”

‘Do it! I want to feel her face!’ Cal’s voice commanded.

Somewhere in the distance, I felt Mendax titter—actually titter.

I decided to just go for it. I brushed a small section of pink and brown hair from her cheekbone and let my palm remain still on her face. “She wants me to feel your face so she can feel you—or at least feel how I feel you.”

Anna looked at me. I wonder what she saw when she looked at me like that, like she could see inside of me. She tilted her chin up slightly, giving me a better view and also putting us in an incredibly intimate moment. “Go ahead,” she said softly.

‘Ooh, what are you doing now? You really like that. Focus! Does she have wrinkles? Freckles? Tattoos? Really feel it.’ Cal’s speech was rushed and curious.

I moved my hand up the side of her delicate face, letting my thumb caress the three tiny creases at her eyes.

“She has the scars of laughter and deep smiles at the corner of her eyes,” I said both out loud and in my mind.

“Her eyes have more depth than a hole and more light than anything else in this horrid place.”

‘Horrid place?’ Mendax decided to jump in. Again. ‘You are aware we can feel what you feel, right, Sunshine? Horrible where? You sure seem to be warming up to whatever is there quickly.’

‘Why are you still here? I snarled internally. ‘And don’t call me Sunshine.’

“What’s wrong?” Anna asked.

The air deflated from my lungs. “Mendax, he keeps calling me Sunshine.”

Anna cracked a wide smile. “And what do you call him? Is he talking with you as well?”

I glowered. “Yes, he is here, and before you ask, no, I have no clue why I can talk to both him and Cal through the bond.” I thought for a moment. “And I of course call him by his birth name: Smoke-Show.”

Cal laughed and I felt a flicker of light and happy feelings push into the bond.

“How are things going in the lab, Cal?” I asked, hoping to feel more of her happiness.

‘Amazing,’ she said.

‘It’s not amazing,’ Mendax interrupted.’ You spend all day in there when you should be resting.’

‘Why should she be resting?’ I looked at Anna. “Cal has a lab she’s been working on,” I explained, “and Mendax says she spends all day in there but should be resting.”

“She wants to tell us something,” I said aloud to Anna.

“What is it? Is she okay?” Anna asked.

‘I’m pregnant, Eli,’ Cal said. She sounded so nervous telling me.