Page 26 of Bride Takes a Laird (Highland Vows & Vengeance #2)

U pon the rise that abutted the field on the border of Cameron land, Magnus and his soldiers lined the ridge, side by side. Silhouetted and framed by the gray sky beyond them, Magnus hoped the Chattans hadn’t spotted them from their land. Magnus peered below and his brows drew together at the sight of the short wall the Chattans had erected. There were no sheep in sight, and yet, the fact that they cut them off from their land irritated him. Magnus took the slope and his soldiers followed. When he reached the bottom, he dismounted and stepped to the wall. His men awaited instruction and their outrage was evident in their grousing and the harsh gazes upon their faces.

“I want this wall destroyed. Take every rock and toss it over the ravine. We will not make it easy for the Chattans to rebuild their wall again when the weather warms.”

The mass of soldiers dismounted and ran to the wall. They took the stones the Chattans had used to build the wall and removed them one by one, carrying them to the crevice in the land. Magnus lifted a heavy stone and lugged it to the nearby gorge. He tossed it into what seemed to be a bottomless void in the land. No sound was audible when the stone hit the bottom of the abyss.

It took most of the morning to disable the wall. By the time they’d finished, the sky grew even more dismal with heavy clouds. On their ride home, fat snowflakes fell and covered the ground, their horses, and themselves. Their beasts pounded the ground with their hooves as they rode through the gate, flattening the snowy trail to the keep. His men assembled at the training field and readied to practice arms. Magnus flung his hand up in greeting at Wyren who approached.

“Is it done?” his brother asked.

“Aye, the wall is gone. We’ll have to send the sentry to ensure the Chattans don’t build another. The men want to practice arms but I deem they deserve a day off since they tarried all morn carrying heavy stone.”

“I’ll let them know,” Wyren said and stepped to the edge of the field. He cupped his mouth with his hands and bellowed, “Men, ye are permitted the rest of the day to seek your leisure. Report back on the morrow unless I deem otherwise.”

His men shouted with glee. Many of them gathered snow in their hands and tossed it at each other. The melee continued and Magnus was hit with a ball or two of formed snow. He chuckled and relaxed at the sight of his men enjoying themselves. He didn’t leave the field and watched his men’s mirthful entertainment and merriment.

Someone struck him in his chest with a snowball and he glared at Wyren, who chortled. “Ye are testing my patience.”

“Why do ye not join in?” His brother tossed another snowball at him and guffawed.

“I detest the snow.” Magnus marched forward to stand with Wyren. “I am putting ye in charge of the task of ensuring the Chattans do not build another wall. If ye need to post men at the border then do so.”

“Why? Ye usually like to control such a mission.”

He shook his head. “I mean to give ye more authority and will entrust ye to see to the matter. Ye are more than capable of handling the responsibility. In the future, I will delegate more important matters to ye, Jake, and others. ’Tis time I hang back a wee bit. ”

Wyren frowned at him. “ Och why? It is because of Kendra? Do ye mean to go to her?”

Hearing his wife’s name tensed his shoulders. “Aye, I do. As soon as this damnable snow ceases or lets up, I’ll be taking Hayden with me. I’m not sure how long I’ll be gone but I trust ye will see to the clan until my return.”

Wyren set a hand on his shoulder. “I am gladdened to hear this, brother. Worry not for I will ensure all is handled whilst ye are gone.” His brother bowed his head and marched off toward the field.

Magnus chuckled aloud at the sight of his men in a melee of snow being thrown to and fro. His soldiers’ voices rose in mirth and their expletives shouted in aghast of being targeted. He joined in, knelt, and retrieved a bit of snow, formed it into a ball, and tossed it at Wyren. His aim struck true and landed in the center of Wyren’s back. His brother turned and glared at him. Magnus shrugged but then bellowed in laughter at his brother’s disgruntlement.

“It is good to see ye laugh,” Jake said on his approach.

“There hasn’t been much to laugh about recently.”

“I should have been there to help ye take down the wall. Aye, Da told me where ye and the soldiers went this morn. Magnus, I trained hard to gain my comrade’s respect and yours. Finally, I have succeeded in wielding my sword for the clan and am effective with my bow and dagger. Because of Ned, I am resigned to regain your respect and my comrades’ once again…”

Magnus sighed at his brother’s passionate speech. He understood how hard Jake had trained and knew the lengths he’d gone to, to effectively gain skill. He’d been the first on the field and the last to leave on many a day. Jake gave his all to training and Magnus had been proud of him.

“I told no one about what ye confessed to me, except for Wyren and Da.” Magnus had only spoken to their direct family about Jake’s involvement in Ned’s death, and that he’d sought retribution in the name of their clan.

“Our clansmen must suspect something is amiss and most shun me. Mayhap it is the way ye avoid me. Ye cannot even look at me, can ye?” Jake used his boot to kick at the snow.

He was astute in that because Magnus had avoided him. The only reason he had, was because he was uncertain what to do about the situation. That Jake had to regain respect from their brethren disheartened him. He wanted to forgive Jake but that was easier said than done. In truth, he was obligated to banish his brother for lying to everyone. But Jake was a beloved member of their clan, well-respected, and a fierce asset to their army. It was hard to decide if his betrayal outweighed his worth as a clan member.

“I am still considering what to do about your wrongdoing. Ye were led astray by Ned, and I understand that ye sought to make him see he’d made a mistake before he was caught.” Magnus kept a serious tone to his words and hoped his brother understood the position he’d put him in. “If ye were not my brother and I was laird, I’d have to punish ye for the killing of two of our clansmen even though they deserved their end. Ye should have come to me and told me what ye suspected.”

Jake nodded continually. “Aye, I should have, och I was unsure how ye would react. I was closer to Ned than I ever was to ye. My whole life, you and I barely spoke two words to each other. But Ned, all I wanted to do was to protect him and give him a chance to turn back. He was always there for me, Magnus, when we were wee and others teased me. He’d protected me most of our childhood. Ye were never around and even though ye are the laird, I couldn’t trust ye to help Ned. I owed him my allegiance. Our bond was strong.”

Magnus flinched. It was true that he and Ned were close. He’d had little to no time to form a bond with Jake or Ned. But he understood why Jake would want to protect Ned. They’d been raised together and their bond was greater than any that Magnus had with his brothers. A regrettable feeling overtook him at such a thought. He’d wished he’d been given the opportunity to form such a relationship, to have an unyielding trust and connection with his brothers. But since he hadn’t been fostered with them, they didn’t know each other well enough.

“We Camerons do not take arms against each other even if deserved. There are ways to punish those who need it. But there are also times when killing a man is called for.”

Jake took a step toward him and held out his hand. “Take my hand then before ye slay me and take my life. I deserve the punishment, brother, and I am ready to face it.”

Magnus’s chest twinged with pain at his brother’s words. The last thing he’d ever do was to take his brother’s life or harm him. “Ye took from me my right as the laird to enact retribution and to discipline those who beheld treason. I cannot banish ye or harm ye. In the future, Jake, ye need to come to me if ye find out someone is against us. We shall, all of us, collectively, decide what to do and take action.”

“Am I forgiven then?” Jake clasped his hand. His brother’s eyes shimmered with tears.

Magnus enclosed his fingers around his brother’s hand, but pulled him into an embrace and pounded his back with affection. “Ye must prove yourself worthy of my forgiveness and when ye do, I’ll have Wyren put ye in charge of a regimen of soldiers. Ye have earned the right to do so, but must rebuild that trust.”

“I am grateful, Laird, for your pardon and I promise ye that I will regain your trust.” Jake bowed to him and marched away.

Magnus was glad that was over with. He’d thought long and hard about how to handle his brother’s overstepping his authority. Yet he had to admit that Jake possessed loyalty and that alone saved him from being banished. Of course, there was also the fact that his parents would never have forgiven him if he had banished Jake.

The men finished their revelry and sauntered from the field. Most had dampened garments from being pummeled by the wet snow. He too was cold and slightly damp from the snow that had hit him. He walked leisurely back to the keep, feeling lighter than he had in days. Magnus entered his bedchamber and rummaged through a trunk for a change of garments. He hurried to the kitchen and had the servants warm water for a bath. When the water was nearly filled half way in the tub, Magnus stepped into it and sank down. The heated water eased him and warmed him within a moment.

The door banged and he glanced up to find his brother Wyren strolling inside. “I told the men to stay within their cottages and the barracks on the morrow. It looks to be a heavy snow falling. We will probably need to stay inside until the snow lets up, and it might be days until we can take to the field again. When it does let up, I will have the soldiers clear the paths and distribute firewood to those who need it.”

Magnus rubbed a soapy cloth over his chest. He continued to wash as his brother enlightened him on his orders to the soldiers. “I wish this snow would let up now because…”

“Ye wish to be on your way, aye?” Wyren sat on a stool and snatched a sweet roll recently taken from the oven and ate it.

“I miss her. She probably detests me for not coming to her sooner. I am uncertain what I will find when I finally do reach her—a sweet lass or a wrathful minx. The crux of it, is that I’ve wanted to leave straight away when I found out that she left. But with all the problems that I’ve had to deal with…and now I am further delayed.”

“I feel for ye, brother. Wives are never easy to please. Marny often scolds me for naught but I cannot be angry with her because I usually deserve it. My advice is to confess your sins and beg for her forgiveness.”

Magnus chuckled at the grimace on his brother’s face. “Aye, I intend to, if I can get to her. It might take until spring if this horrid snow doesn’t cease.” He finished his bath and by then all of the kitchen servants had gone to seek their beds. After he dressed, he sat on the stool next to Wyren and ate a small bit of stew. “Are ye hiding here?”

His brother chortled. “Caught me, aye? Hale is fussy this night. I suppose that I should go and relieve Marny for she’s been dealing with the bairn all day. Ye might want to wait afore ye bless your lives with bairns because they can be difficult.” Wyren shifted off the stool and headed for the door with a chuckle.

Magnus considered his brother’s jest and reasoned he might be right. Bairns would come eventually, but he was content to wait a few years before he and Kendra became parents. He supposed it was in God’s and the goddess’s hands. He finished his supper and left the kitchen. As he crossed the thoroughfare between the buildings, he pulled his tartan tightly around him to ward off the coldness. That night everything would freeze for it was colder than he’d ever recalled.

The wind forced the door to close behind him when he entered the keep. Magnus headed for the great hall and collected a cup of ale on his way to the fire. He pulled a trunk near a chair and set his drink on it. Then he sat back and shifted his feet atop the trunk. He was about to close his eyes and take his rest when he heard someone’s footsteps.

“Magnus, are ye asleep?” His mother’s voice sounded.

He opened his eyes to find her standing near him. “I was about to be.”

“I don’t mean to keep ye from your rest but Jake just told me what ye decided.” She took the chair next to his and rubbed her hands together, warming them. “’Tis so cold this eve.” She seemed to be deciding what to say as she held her hands out to the fire. Finally, she said, “I want to thank ye for being so forgiving toward him.”

“Of course I would forgive him. He is my brother and a damned good soldier for our clan.”

“Can ye also forgive a mother who is undeserving?”

Magnus set his feet on the floor and leaned forward. “Why do ye say such a thing? What do ye need forgiveness for? ”

His mother’s eyes lowered. “For my brash behavior of late. ’Tis just I was so devastated by Ned’s death, and then to learn what Jake did… I rebuked ye and I should not have. As laird ye had every right to act the way ye did. I should have held my tongue.”

“I do not hold it against ye, Ma, so worry not.”

“I never got to love ye like I loved your brothers. I never got to nurse your wounds when ye were a lad or dry your tears when ye got hurt. I was angry that ye were taken from me, ye being so young. Why did ye stay away?” She sniffled back tears.

Magnus was astounded by what his mother said to him. “I…I didn’t think ye cared for me because ye allowed the elders to take me from ye. I thought ye cared more for my brothers than me, and so I…stayed away.”

“I should have fought against it when they took ye and Wyren. I should have forced your da to stand up to the elders but me and your da understood the service ye were destined to. We did not want to interfere. I lost out on many good years with ye, son, and it saddens me.” Tears gathered in his ma’s eyes and she swiped them away with the back of her hand.

Magnus reached for her hand and held it tenderly. Then he rose and pulled her up into his embrace. “Do not weep. It hurts me to see ye so distressed. Ma, I wanted nothing more than for ye to nurse me and coddle me like ye did Ned and Jake. I am sure Wyren feels the same way. But ye are right, we were destined to put aside our wants and wills to serve the clan. I am not displeased by it now that I’m older. Ye have my forgiveness if ye accept mine.”

“I am grateful for your mercy, and of course, I forgive ye. There should be no strife betwixt us, Magnus.” She squeezed his body before releasing him. “I shall go and seek my bed now. See ye on the morrow?”

He nodded and leaned back as he watched her leave the hall. The conversation with his mother eased him but also beset him with a little melancholy. It was a long time in coming and they should have spoken sooner about the time he’d been taken from his parents’ loving arms.

Magnus shivered a little, fetched a tartan from a trunk across the hall, and returned to his chair. He covered himself with it and leaned back. With his eyes closed, he was weary enough to fall asleep. He only hoped his troubles allowed him to rest.

More footsteps sounded in the hall. He ignored them and kept his eyes closed until he heard his father’s voice. “Magnus, why are ye sleeping down here when ye have a warm bed above?”

His eyes shot open and he peered at his da. “I cannot sleep there. Not without Kendra. There are too many reminders of her there.”

“What reminders?” His da took the seat next to him.

Magnus sighed and thought he’d never get rest if everyone insisted on conversing with him. “Reminders? Ah, well there’s the bed we shared, her belongings, the manuscripts she went through for me. Da, when I last saw her, I was so angry with her because she…” He swallowed his culpability at being cross with Kendra.

His father peered at him inquisitively. “Because she what, son?”

“She entered the figures of our stores from the time Ned went missing. I had wanted to do it and she didn’t ask for permission to employ herself as the steward. I said some rather unbecoming things to her and was harsh. Being there…in my bedchamber reminds me of how coarsely I treated her and I cannot get the vision of her dejected face from my mind. It was my duty—”

“Duty,” his father said, cutting him off. “There is more to life than duty to the clan. Magnus, in all your training to become laird, the elders missed one important detail. That is, ye alone cannot do everything. Ye must rely on your clansmen and women, your direct family, but most of all, your wife. Your wife and children should always come first, then yourself, and finally your clan.”

“I know that now, Da. Kendra tried to tell me that before she left. She told me to leave the clan’s matters at the door when I entered our bedchamber. I deemed she wanted my attention but I acted borishly. She only meant to aid me and like an arse, I criticized her for doing so. I hope with all my heart that she forgives me when next I see her.”

“Ye must find a way to meet her halfway. So ye intend to see her again? I thought that since ye had not left that ye were resigned to let her stay at her family’s manor.”

Magnus grunted at his father’s assumption. “I wanted to leave but I still had to find out what happened to Ned and then there was the Chattan’s interference. Now that I’ve solved the mystery of Ned’s death and we’ve dealt with the Chattans… I vow to go to her but I’m despaired that she didn’t leave me a missive or send one explaining…”

“No message has come?”

“Nay and that tells me that she is still wrathful at me. I await the snow to melt and then I shall leave. I grow weary waiting for the weather to break.”

“It is hard to be separated from those that we love.”

Magnus quailed at his father’s conjecture but what he’d said was an utter truth. “I never got to tell her that I love her.”

“Ye must do so when ye see her.” His father smiled and nodded encouragingly.

“What if she doesn’t love me in return?” Admitting such vulnerability was something he’d never thought to profess. He wanted Kendra to love him because he loved her with his entire being. Now if only he could find a way to prove it. And what if she didn’t love him? The king had given her to him and she had no choice but to accept their marriage. If she didn’t love him now, he’d get her to love him one day.

“There’s no sense, lad, in staying here in the cold hall. Go on and seek your bed. Let the reminders be for the night. Cease being so hard on yourself.”

Magnus agreed by nodding but he made no move to go to his bedchamber. He wouldn’t sleep there until Kendra returned, he vowed so and wouldn’t go back on his promise to himself. As he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep, he envisioned her next to him, her bonny smile, and her soft touches.